An Explanation
Luz’s POV
Luz stared hard at the device in her hand. A classic video game system, the kind you’d hook up to your TV using the three different colored plugs. It looked like someone had run it through a car wash.
“This is the original system, not a remake. Could be worth a few hundred if I refurbish it well enough.” Luz turned her computer screen around to show Eda the page she found.
“Hey Luz…”
“I know what you’re thinking and yes, some of the consoles on the site are worth more but those are mint condition and this will just be a refurbishment.”
“Luz…”
“I’ll need to start by taking it apart and seeing the internal damage but I have a feeling the only hard to find part is gonna be-”
“Luz!”
Luz dropped her screwdriver and looked up at Eda in shock. The woman was peering down at her like she’d grown a second head. King was perched in front of her on the opposite side of the table, giving Luz a similar look. “Do I… do I have something on my face?” Luz asked sheepishly, rubbing her fingers over her eyes. She’d been having trouble focusing her vision lately, that usually started happening when she went too long with poor sleep.
“Kid…” Luz blinked up at Eda, finally able to decipher that her expression was different than she’d initially thought. “What’s going on with you? You don’t look right.” Concern. That was the expression.
Trying to swallow the lump in her throat, Luz opened her mouth to speak but the sudden stop had made her lose all momentum. It felt like she was trying to spit up dust. She coughed to clear her throat but it wasn’t working. It was Sunday, they’d shut off the water yesterday. She’d already filled up a water bottle here three times, it sat half empty in front of her but she didn’t reach for it now. Slowly, she brought one of her hands into her lap and squeezed it to try to relieve the tension while she tried to force some words out of her mouth to no avail.
“Luz, hey.” Eda’s voice was calm. It sounded strange to come from a woman who usually had a much more energetic attitude. As though she were approaching a wild animal, Eda gently took the gaming console from Luz’s hand and placed it down on the table before taking the seat next to Luz. The girl felt as though she were frozen in place. “Okay, look. I haven’t said anything before because I figured it wasn’t my business, but something’s off. It’s been off for a while but it’s been getting worse.”
Luz blinked, breaking out of her trance enough to rapidly shake her head. “I- I’m fine.”
“Stop.” Eda held up her hand and Luz was back to staring at her face, trying to figure out what she had to say so that she could go back to work. “Luz, you look like you haven’t slept in weeks, you can’t do makeup well enough to hide the bruises, and despite the fact that you consume a rather large portion of my yogurt cups you still look like a damn twig.” There was a moment's hesitation before Eda placed her hand on Luz’s shoulder, she could practically feel her collar bone digging into the woman’s hand. “I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s happening.”
Tears started to well up in Luz’s eyes. Her lip was quivering. She didn’t want to cry, she never cried in front of others. Crying was for people who weren’t supposed to be the ones that other people go to for comfort. She didn’t cry when Boscha kicked the chair out from under her in the lunchroom. She didn’t cry when the girls from her last school wrote homophobic slurs over her locker in permanant marker after she’d came out to them as bi. She didn’t cry ten years ago when she’d sat in the principal’s office for the first time in her life and listened to a grown woman call her every racial slur in the book while the secretary tried to call her mom for the fifth time that night, even though Luz had already told them that she wouldn’t pick up because her mom was an ER nurse and there was probably an emergency.
No. She didn't cry then. She wasn’t going to cry-
There was something around her. Something warm and calming. Eda was hugging her.
Luz didn’t do it intentionally but she just didn’t really have control over her body any more. Her arms reached up and hugged the woman back. A staggering breath stabbed its way into her lungs as she broke. Tears spilled down her cheeks like a waterfall and onto the shoulder of Eda’s dress. There was no whining or blubbering, just wheezing breath after wheezing breath while the hand on her back kept her anchored to the world around her.
They sat like that for a very long time. Long enough for King to weasel his way into the space between them on their laps without them really noticing. After an eternity of silence and calming touches, Luz finally felt her breathing steady and Eda pulled away just far enough to look her in the eye. “You okay?”
Luz nodded.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
She hesitated a second, then nodded again.
Eda gave Luz’s shoulder a squeeze and got up from her chair. Luz watched as the older woman prepared two mugs of warm apple cider, one of which may or may not have been spiked just a little bit, and placed the other one down in front of Luz.
The girl wrapped her hands around the warm mug and was grateful for the sensation. “I need more hours.” The words came out of Luz’s mouth like a croak.
Eda sighed, “Okay. Look, kid, as I said before, you look like you’re sick, why on Earth are you asking for more hours right now? If you tell me what’s actually going on, maybe I can actually help you. Please, you’re practically dead on your feet here.”
Luz looked down at the mug in her hands and tentatively took a sip. This was gonna be hard. “Did you know my dad was an insurance agent?” She didn’t look up but could feel Eda looking at her. “He was a good one too. He worked long hours and got promotions while my mom finished her nursing degree and eventually got a job at a really good hospital. They built their lives together from the ground up and when they found out they were pregnant with me it was like they’d won the lottery.” Luz chuckled, she could feel tears prickling at her eyes again and let them fall but let that be the end of it.
“Then… my dad got sick.” She sniffled, “Started treatment immediately but the insurance company that he worked for… they claimed that the treatment was experimental and wouldn’t pay for it. My mom sold everything, took out every loan she could, emptied their bank account, but it didn't matter. By the time I was born he couldn’t even hold me in his arms. There aren’t any pictures of us together.”
Another deep breath, keep it together. “Now, we’re just stuck. My mom’s been working to dig us out of this hole for as long as I can remember. I started picking up odd jobs by the time I was twelve to help out, but the debt kept growing and it’s been all we can do just to keep our head above the water. I know that she loves me more than anything, that she’s doing the best she can and that she feels horrible that I have to deal with this too, but-” she hiccups. Her knuckles were turning white against the mug. “Eda, I don’t know what to do. I haven’t been eating, I barely sleep because the only time I get to see my mom is at three in the morning, and school is full of nothing but jerks that i can’t do anything about because nothing would ever happen except my mom needing to leave work early for the day.”
Eda nodded her head slowly, making sure that Luz was done speaking before reaching over and scratching behind King’s ears as the animal had been snuggled into Luz’s lap for the entirety of the rant. She was actually very grateful for him being there so that she had something to hold on to. “Well kid, I can’t say that I can help you with all of that. Believe me I wish I could, but there’s a reason I haven’t gotten around to fixing the hole that’s underneath the picture frame next to Hooty.”
As if to prove a point the clock started screeching from the other room. It was nowhere near the hour.
“Oh shut up ya stupid bird!” Eda screamed back at it and Luz couldn’t help but let out a chuckle though it may have sounded more like a croak. Eda smiled slightly when she noticed the girl’s laugh. “But... I can say that I’ve been fair to you in terms of an hourly wage and with the commissions that you make, and I’m going to keep being fair about it. And as for some of that other stuff,” she jabbed her thumb over shoulder, “fridge has food-”
“Eda, I can’t do that-”
“Real food, not just yogurt, and you’re not just taking it or anything. I’m going to actually start getting groceries so that you can make something. See I’m a crap cook who’s been living off of frozen pizza for about two months now. I’m pretty sure you’ve mentioned that you cook before so if you cook and eat with me here around dinner time, you can take whatever’s left home with you.”
Luz sat there, staring at Eda, not really sure what to say.
“Oh, one more thing.” Eda finally released Luz’s shoulder and got up from her chair. She took two steps to the side and started rifling through one of the several junk drawers in the kitchen. After a few seconds, she pulled something out and placed it in Luz’s hand. “That’s a key to the shop. I’m trusting you with it.”
“Eda-”
“If anything happens, you can come in at any time. I leave the staff door unlocked so you can just come right up to the apartment if you need anything.”
Luz was frozen, her eyes glued to the key in her hand. She couldn’t accept this. Could she? She started shaking again.
“Kid, I just want you to be safe okay? I might not show it in the traditional way but I do care about you and I care if you’re okay.”
A sniffle came from Luz. She used the heel of her hand to wipe at some of the dried tears as she nodded slowly. “Okay.”