Jonny levied a serious assessing gaze at the crew before him.
In a picnic-dress and a little basket to match, Nastya looked the very definition of russian farm girl. Her expression could use a little work though, her glare could probably kill right now.
Brian, looking very much the same as always really. He did have an oil can in his hand however, so Jonny supposed it counted.
Tim...still hadn’t noticed the dog ears and looked very proud of himself for “successfully” getting out of wearing a costume. Ashes had a bet going on how long it took Tim to notice his additions. Ivy had bet two books on never, citing a 100% confidence rate.
Good old Marius was in a lion onesie. That was enough said about what the hell was going on there.
The Toy Soldier was looking rather...stuffed. Straw poked out of its uniform in odd places, and Jonny was confident it had stuck an entire crate of hay down its pants. Whatever floated its boat he supposed.
Raphaella had on an incredibly floofy dress that took up more than half the loading bay. Could she even fly in that? Well, not his problem, as long as she fulfilled her duties. Though, he could have sworn he saw an octo kitten or two hiding beneath all the tulle.
Embracing the Oz aesthetic to the maximum, Ashes made quite the handsome green bastard wizard. Not that Jonny would ever tell them that, though he should’ve expected it with how hard they went as Hades.
It had taken hours to pull Ivy out of her library. It wasn’t worth the effort to convince her to put down her book for a change, but she did eventually compromise and put on a sticker name tag. He would just have to figure out her role later.
And finally, himself. He looked quite dashing he thought, with how much woosh the wizard robe gave him. Tim had managed a smear of green paint on Jonny’s face that he couldn’t wash off in time for curtain rise, a pity. Alas, the show must go on.
Raising his broom, Jonny pointed forward at the planet that had no idea what was coming.
“Onwards!”
“Ding dong the Witch is dead,” Ivy sang, lounging back on a lawn chair. “Which old Witch? The Wicked Witch!”
On her shirt was a crumpled sticker name tag that read: ‘Hello! My name is: Munchkin #1’.
“Are there any other munchkins?” Nastya asked, staring curiously. She’d noticed Jonny’s mild tantrum about Ivy’s lack of costume earlier but didn’t get a good look.
“Would you like to meet #2?” Ivy asked, pausing her singing.
“Yes please.”
Ivy pulled another name tag out of her pocket and stuck it over the old one. It now read ‘Hello! My name is: Munchkin #2’.
“Here you go Dorothy! The red shoes of a dead witch!” Raphaella waved her fairy wand over the corpse smashed under Aurora, and pretended to summon the shoes to her hands. The shoes, of course, remained where they were.
Raphaella frowned at them.
A shadowy figure about the size of a cat crept up from beneath her massive dress and removed the shoes with a strong tug of a few tentacles. It then carefully presented them up to Raphaella.
“Oh! Thank you.”
The octo-kitten purred in delight and ran back into the safety and comfort of the fabric.
“You probably shouldn’t smell those flowers Tim,” Marius warned. They kind of look like-”
Tim fell into the poppies, dead asleep. Marius attempted to catch him but also got a whiff of the pollen and fell right beside. Nastya, who hadn’t been paying attention, finally turned around and inhaled in mild confusion before also collapsing.
Brian, surrounded by the sleeping bodies of his friends, sighed despairingly.
Ivy threw an apple at Tim’s head from off stage. It bounced off nicely.
“Ah Dorothy. You’ve finally arrived. Welcome to the Emerald City,” Ashes grandly gestured to the life-sized bright green lego model of the Aurora. On its side read: ‘Emerald City’ in glowing neon green.
The traveling band of misfits stared at the impressive feat of engineering in slight concern.
“You have too much time on your hands, Ashes?” Tim raised a brow.
“Well I’m not allowed to burn down the planet until we finish, so I had to get creative.”
“You wanna go home kid?” Ashes gestured widely, standing on their wide green stage. The curtains fluttered dramatically around them.
“Not particularly no,” Nastya replied, picking at her fingernails.
The curtains ceased their fluttering. Nastya and Ashes looked at each other for a moment, Ashes looking very disappointed. Nastya rolled her eyes.
“Yes oh great wizard,” she droned. “Please grant my wish. I want to go home.”
Ashes got their wind back, and so did the curtains. “Well Dorothy nothing comes for free, you gotta do a little something for me first.”
“I'm supposed to be 13, this is extortion.”
“Shush you. Go kill the evil wicked witch of the west, he sucks ass AND took my gold as blackmail.”
“Yes, yes. I’m off. Why do you have all that gold anyways?”
“Um. Tax purposes.”
Hey TS, you’re leaking straw again.” Jonny lazily pointed out, lounging back on his broom. He gently drifted over the gaggle of misfits down below, who majority stared up at him irritatedly.
The Toy Soldier looked over its uniform, noticing the small bits of straw poking out the seams. It patted it down quickly. “Thank you for the tip, Jonny old chap!”
“Aw look, Jonny’s being nice to TS isn’t that sweet?” Marius cooed sweetly, bringing his lion onesie paws in a clap.
“Fuck off, I don’t want straw all over my wizard robes when I kidnap it, is all.”
“According to the script, you kidnap Nastya, not the Toy Soldier,” Ivy piped up, a script in her hands. Her name tag read: ‘Hello! My name is: Flying Monkey A’. “Also, witch robes Jonny, you’re a witch”
“And you’re a wizard Harry. Fuck off.”
“Run Toto run,” Nastya smiled. Tim looked a little disturbed.
“Who’re you calling Toto?”
“Well, the person who has dog ears on of course.”
“Who the fuck has dog ear-oh fuck no.” Tim reached up and felt around for the ears on his head and swore loudly. “Whoever the fuck pulled this shit is gonna die!”
Ivy groaned as she placed two books into a grinning Ashes’ hands.
“That was cheating,” she complained. “If nobody told him we could’ve gone the entire time.”
“Sucks to suck,” Ashes retorted.
“Oh nooo, I’m melting. I’m melting,” Jonny deadpanned as Nastya drenched him with the bucket.
Nastya, Tim, Brian, and Marius stared at the dripping wet Jonny for a bit in silence. The Toy Soldier was just happy to be involved.
“I thought you were supposed to replace that with acid earlier,” Marius mock-whispered to the Toy Soldier.
“Ms. Raphaella took the last of it before I could get it in time!” The Toy Soldier chipperly replied.
“Wait, what? Why did Raph-”
Then the room flooded in acid.
“Well that was a productive use of our time,” Jonny shrugged as the remains of the still-burning planet shrunk smaller and smaller behind them.
The others cleared out, grumbling about their melted off hair and whatnot. Jonny ignored them.
“There’s no place like home, there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home,” Nastya was pressed as close as possible to Aurora’s walls. “I missed you dearest.”
Aurora rumbled happily in response.