Recovery

Y/N danced around the room, lighting apple cinnamon candles (the superior fall scent…pumpkin spice is overdone). It was September and high time for spooky season. Her fall playlist blared as she hung up paper leaves and bat scarves from her ceiling. All of a sudden, her phone timer went off. Making her way down to the kitchen, she pulled the two bowls of cookie dough out of the fridge. She had mixed up gingerbread and sugar cookie dough after breakfast that morning. Why was she doing this?

One. It was spooky season.

Two. Her Avengers and Halloween themed cookie cutters had arrived.

They were so freaking cute! Pumpkins, witches, candy corn, cats, and cauldrons, as well as all of her family members in various hero-type poses. She was so excited.

Spooky season was the best. She was never really allowed to celebrate before; her family said it was ‘of the devil’. But now she was going all out! Her fall wardrobe consisted of brown, oranges, greens, purples, golds, and reds; big sweaters, cardigans, and jumpers, as well as tights and heels. Her room was decorated and she had plans in the making that would include a family trip to get pumpkins. In college, she had won a gourd in a trivia game and named her new son Gourdon.

In therapy yesterday, she talked with Dr. Lia about making plans with her family to stay busy. This included drafting a Halloween movies list; none of them were scary, since their lives were scary enough. It was going to be epic.

As she rolled out the dough, she heard the sneaky footsteps of one Sam behind her.

“I swear, you have spidey senses for my cooking, Sam.” You sighed, before turning to face him.

He laughed, hands held in surrender. “Okay, but if I help, can have some first?”

You smiled. “Sure.” You pulled out another cutting board, dusting it in flour and handing him half of the sugar cookie dough. “So we`re going to do the sugar cookies first because otherwise, the sugar cookies will taste like gingerbread.”

As he rolled out the dough, you pulled out your treasure bag of cookie cutters. “Ta-da!” you shouted dramatically, dumping them out.

Both of you squealed over how awesome they were and got to work cutting out cookies and placing them on the cookie sheets.

“So. How are you?” Sam asked as you both worked.

You glanced over before turning back to your work station, rolling out the dough. “I`m ok. I`ve been better, I`ve been worse. All of the spooky season planning is helping, giving me something to do. Lia`s really a great help.”

He nodded. “Yeah, she`s awesome. She helped to get me back on my feet. When I moved in here, I recommended her to Stark and the rest is history.”

You put the trays in the oven. One of the perks of the kitchen was that you could fit four trays in the oven at once. Amazing.

As the two of you began to roll out the gingerbread, you bit your lip. “Sam?”

“Yeah?”

“Therapy`s hard.”

He raised an eyebrow with a smirk. “You know what else is–“

You rolled your eyes before cutting him off. “No, I`m being serious. Its really freaking hard. Half the time, I don’t know if what I feel is even real, let alone trying to explain that and unleash all the trauma I`ve repressed and just ugh. It sucks.”

He smiled, nudging your shoulder. “I know. But you’re doing really awesome, by the way. Don’t be so hard on yourself. I know that’s easier said than done but really. You`ve had, what, two sessions? Three sessions? The fact that you`re already trying says a lot. It`ll get better.”

“What if it gets worse before it gets better?” You waited in the silence. “What if I screw up again?”

Sam turned and wrapped you up in a hug. “You`ve got us all here for you, ok? We`ll take it like we always do, one step at a time. You`re stuck with us now, kiddo.”

You smiled, hugging him back before you both continued cutting out gingerbread Avengers and pumpkins. Once they were in the oven, Sam started to set the sugar cookies to cool while you began to whip up the white icing. Putting it in two bags, you both began to pipe the icing on the edge of the cookies, outlining the Halloween and Avengers shapes. Once the gingerbread was done and cool, you did the same with those.

Waiting for the icing to harden, you shared your Halloween movie list with Sam. He added a few Disney movies to the list before you headed to your room to retrieve your second purchase.

Back in the kitchen, you pulled out the box of Halloween goody bags and twist ties. The two of you set to work putting 4 cookies in each bag and tying them off. Putting them in a plastic pumpkin trick-or-treat container, you turned to Sam.

“Ready for some deliveries?”

He stuffed a cookie in his mouth before giving you a thumbs up. Your laughter echoed down the hall as you got in the elevator.