Chapter 1
The gun on her hands felt heavier than what she was acostume to, it felt like it was pulling her down.
The crimson pool of blood around the body of the criminal she’s been chasing was spreading, reaching her feet. The gun disappeared from her hands, when she looked at them, there was only blood.
She could feel her chest tightening, she couldn’t breath, everything turned red around her, she was trapped, drowning and then…
Her eyes snapped open, her first reaction was to reach for air, her breathing was irregular and everything around her was darkness. She started to move her arms as if trying to desperately reach for something. Panic started to invade her as she felt her chest tightening again and her body started to shake. Then, someone took her hands gently and pulled her into a soft hug.
“I-”
“Shhh… Is ok Tamara, I’m here. It’s going to be ok.” The voice was soft and comforting.
Tamara had no idea how long they stood there, but neither moved. She managed to regularize her breathing and her eyes adapted to the darkness of the room, when she finally was able to, she returned the hug, holding onto her girlfriend almost as if she was going to disappear.
Her hands were still trembling, she buried her face on her girlfriend's neck as she caressed her back.
“More nightmares?”
Tamara nodded not moving from her position.
“Tsk tsk tsk, i’m sorry to hear that.”
“I’m fine.” Tamara finally managed to say, her voice shaky.
She pulled away slowly, and looked at her girlfriend's eyes. It gave her a sense of peace.
“Do you want to talk about it?” she asked delicately.
“I… I just need a drink,” Tamara stood from the bed and made her way to the kitchen.
Her girlfriend followed her; she had a disapproving look on her face as Tamara served herself a fair amount of whiskey.
“You know I don’t like that.” she said looking at her as she walked towards the couch “Is not good for you.”
“Fátima please.” Tamara said as she sat down. She took a sip of her drink, the burning sensation running down her throat grounding her on reality.
Fátima sighed and sat next to her. The moonlight coming through the window illuminated the place making it easier for them to see their faces.
The concern on Fátima’s face was clear, Tamara didn’t like to see her like that but it became a recurrent thing since she came back from Argentina a couple months ago. She would wake up in panic from a nightmare, Fátima would try to comfort her, she would have her drink and then attempt to sleep again, but she almost never could.
Tamara’s mind started to wander. “Don’t drink so fast.” Fátima´s voice brought her back. She had downed the drink already,
She put the glass down and turned to face Fátima, who just opened her arms waiting for her to come to her, Tamara moved towards her and let her girlfriend hug her once again, this time more tightly.
After some time they went back to bed, Tamara let Fátima cuddle her while she slept. Tamara couldn’t bring herself to go back to sleep, she just laid there caressing her asleep girlfriend´s hair until the sun came out.