Breakdowns ft. Lashton
Luke’s POV
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I still can’t really believe that this is real. I mean everyone just woke up one morning with these things, beautiful things, on their skin. Which is crazy on its own but knowing that they also lead us to the person who we’re supposed to love for the rest of our lives, it’s insane. And I love it so much.
But that’s not even the best part. The best part of all of this has to be him. In the back of my head, for years, I’ve known that I like guys, I’ve known that I maybe find him attractive, but have never really acted on it. But then he showed up at my door all frantic about the tattoos and we realized that ours match, and that was probably one of the best moments of my life. I really think that the matching needle and thread tattoos wrapping around our wrists is beautiful.
Ash is probably, no, definitely, the best thing that has happened to me. And I couldn’t be happier that we ended up being soulmates. It’s only been a couple of days, but I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy. And I know that he’s really happy about us being together too.
What I’m worried about is how Michael and Calum will react. I really don’t want this to come between our friendship or the band. I know they won’t care that we’re gay, but I’m worried about them having an issue with me and Ashton dating because we’re in the band together.
It definitely isn’t helping my anxiety that neither of them have talked to me or ash since the tattoos showed up. I know Michael and Crystal are probably soulmates, but I have no idea who Calum’s soulmate might be. I’ve had a hunch for a while that Calum might not be into girls, but I don’t want to make any assumptions.
So since neither of them will answer us, me and Ash have decided to go to their houses. We decided to check in with Cal first since he lived closer.
We got to his house and knocked on the door. But no one answered, so we knocked again, a little louder this time, but still nothing. We know he’s home because his car is in the driveway, so we thought he was probably ignoring us. So, we yelled.
“Cal, we know your there, will you please open the door?”.
A couple seconds later the door opened to reveal and very scared, sad, but somewhat relieved looking Calum. He had bags under his eyes and tear tracks on his face. This is definitely not what I was expecting, but now I’m really worried.
“hi”. I barely heard him say it. He was looking at the floor, completely avoiding eye contact.
“Cal, what happened, you look like shit.” Straight to the point, as it always is with Ash. Well maybe not straight, but you get what I mean.
“what are you guys doing here? Did mike send you? I really didn’t mean to screw things up this much, I’m so sorry.” He sounded so scared, broken. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him like this, and it’s scaring me. But also, what does he mean ‘screw things up’ and would Michael have sent us, why wouldn’t he just come here himself if he needed something?
“Cal what are you talking about? Mike won’t answer his phone, we actually came here to talk to you about the tattoos, we tried calling you, but you didn’t answer.” When I mentioned the tattoos, he seemed to tense up really bad. Something is definitely wrong, and I’m guessing it has something to do with the tattoos.
“Umm what about the tattoos?” We’re sitting on the couch in his living room now, but he’s curling in on himself.
“We can talk about that in a minute, but first can you please tell us what’s going on? You look like got run over by a car, plus you’ve been walking around shirtless the whole time we’ve been here.”
“I don‘t want to talk about it, I don’t want you guys to hate me.”
“Cal we could never hate you, no matter what. How about this, you tell us what’s happened to you, and we will tell you what happened to us.” He nodded, and for the first time since we got here, he looked up and spoke at a normal volume,
“I guess this has kind of been a long time coming, I wasn’t really planning on talking about it any time soon, but I guess it’s better to hear it from my than someone else.”
“Cal what’s going on, what happened?”
“wh-when the tattoos showed up, I didn’t notice at first, but Mike called me and told me about it. He told me to see if I could find mine, that’s why I’m not wearing a shirt,”
“Cal, we found out about the tattoos days ago”
“I realize that but um, when I found my tattoo, well you can see for yourself.” And he held out his right arm. And sitting there on his arm was a tattoo that definitely wasn’t there the last time I saw him. It read ‘Since the Beginning’ in scratchy handwriting.
“Cal that’s a beautiful soul mar- “
“Don’t call it that. Please don’t. I really liked it at first too, but now I just really wish it would go away.”
“At first?”
“Why do you want it to go away?” Ashton added right after me.
“Well remember how I said I was on a call with Mike?”
“Yeah, but what does that have to do with you not liking your mark?”
“Well um, I showed him, and he uh, well I don’t think he was very happy about it.” It sounded like he was holding back tears now.
“why not?” Ash whispered almost scared.
“cause the same three words on his right forearm too. But he has Crystal, and their really happy, and I don’t want to ruin that. Plus, it doesn’t even matter anyway, he’s straight, and I’m not, but he is. He said that this had to have been a mistake, that he would never work out. I think he hates me. And the worst part is that I really like him, and so I might have gotten a little defensive, but he doesn’t know how I feel. And he CAN’T know how I feel. I just wan him to be happy, but I kind of had a break down, and maybe hung up on him, and I may have just left my bathroom floor for the first time since that call, when you guys got here.”