Fireproof

“Don’t you think she’s a little young?” Eudora said with a smirk as Diego led her down the stairs of his boiler room apartment.

Diego raised a hand, “She’s 3. If she’s old enough to walk, she’s old enough to fight - here - watch this--”

They came up to where Kenzie was set up in the middle of his apartment, it looked strange next to his practical decor and empty space to see the bright children’s blanket and the scattering of toys. A high chair set next to his makeshift kitchen and obnoxiously colored juice boxes that he had stacked next to his fridge now that he was able to babysit his niece.

“Hey, Kenz’!” Eudora held his hand as she followed him to where his niece was standing next to a small toy kitchen set up that he had brought over from Klaus’ apartment.

She looked up and waved, “Hello!”

Eudora did the same, her face softening as she watched both the little one an the way that Diego changed when she was around him, “Hey, Kenzie, do you remember me?”

“Uh-huh!” The three year old stated confidently.

“Kenz - I was wondering, since you’re in your kitchen - what would you do if a bad guy came up and did this--”

He got on his knees and held up a finger gun towards her face.

“Jesus christ, Diego…”

“Just wait--”

She thought about it for a moment then grabbed her fake frying pan and whipped his hand away. Diego played out the move, his hand falling back slowly like the gin was falling away and she stepped forward and punched him in the solar plexus. He bent over, still playing out the scene. The 3 year old moved forward and kicked him in the crotch to finish out the moves that he taught her - he shielded himself but fell over defeated anyway.

Kenzie dropped the plastic frying pan and clapped proudly as Diego rolled back onto his knees and held his hand up. She high fived him with all of her might - “That’s my girl!” Then he looked back up to Eudora, “See - She already knows combo moves! She’s a natural!”

“That’s very impressive, Kenzie - Now that you’ve gotten away from the bad guy, what do you do now?”

The toddler thought hard about the question for a few moments before picking up her frying pan and just continuing to beat her uncle in the shoulder with it for good measure. Diego Hargreeves did the closest sound to a giggle that he was capable of and although it made her heart warm with a strange affection that was now coming through - seeing this gentler side to her boyfriend - she was still a cop first and foremost.

“Diego, she missed the first, most important step for a 3 year old.”

Both Uncle and niece blinked blankly at the detective.

She shook her head and got on the floor with them, crossing her legs and clasping her hands, “Kenzie - if someone scares you - before you start fighting them you should always try to run away first. Run away and scream as loud as you can for an adult - be as noisy and difficult as possible. Fight as a last option.”

Diego waved his hand, “She knows that - I’m just trying to make sure that if she gets into a fight she wins - right, Kenz’?”

The toddler punched the air passionately in response.

Diego leaned back and glanced at his girlfriend- “I’m so proud.”

She shook her head fondly, “That’s all we need - another tinier version of you running around.”

He laughed, “So what do you say - I told Klaus I’d watch her till he gets off work - we could go to lunch and shop and do boring things or I thought you could stick around and show her how it’s done?”

Eudora sighed. Kenzie was watching them curiously, absently chewing on the plastic spoon that came with the set. She and Diego had had their troubles in the past and he’d initially struggled with the fact that his ex addict brother was now a father but now she loved seeing this new side of her boyfriend. It was a more youthful and excited attitude - he’d decided that he wanted to be a part of his niece's life and like everything that he did, he was determined to be the best.

Patch caved, “Okay - But we’re also teaching her how to sound the alarm and get an adult to help - again - she’s 3.”

“Who says she won’t be fighting other 3 year olds too?” He smirked.

“Oh yeah- I forgot about all the ruffian toddlers roaming the city.”

Diego shrugged, “You never know -” He held out a hand and she took it, allowing him to help her back onto her feet, “Late naps is the cause of 80% of tantrum behavior.” He checked his watch, “Speaking of - we’ve got 40 minutes before naptime - you ready to show her some moves?”

They moved a few feet away onto a makeshift boxing pad, “Okay, Kenz’, you watching? Eudora’s going to teach you some new moves.”

The toddler clapped then plopped down on the floor watching them, her legs kicking impatiently in front of her. “Be careful, uncle Diego! I love you!”

He huffed, “Yeah, you too kiddo - okay--”

Eudora grabbed his arm, twisted him around and flipped him onto his back in one smooth motion which left him out of breath on the floor. She held up a finger,

“Rule number one, Kenzie- never let your guard down and always exploit your opponents weaknesses.”

**************************************************************************************

A few years later…

“Are you a freak too?”

Kenzie looked down mid- swing as the boy came over to the edge of the sand barrier and called over to her. A few of his friends giggling and egging him on.

“What?”

“My dad said- Said that your family is weird and that the government should take you back.” Trent - a blond 1st grader with a loud voice and a big insecure presence walked up to Kenzie who had just been trying to swing in peace.

The swingset was her favorite - she liked the sensation of flying and she was now big enough to go really high without her father’s help. She also liked that the other kids left her alone as long as she wasn’t wandering around the playground by herself. Until now, that is.”

She slowed her swing down with her feet, staring at him, confused as to why he was even talking to her, “Your dad sounds dumb.”

“That’s not true!” He walked up closer and the small group of his friends moved in as well, watching the interaction with as much attention as 5-6 years olds can muster.

“He said you’re probably a freak too.”

Kenzie’s face screwed up, “I’m not a freak!”

“You’ve been talking to yourself -” He accused.

Kenzie glanced over to the ghost child that would hang out on the swing set next to her - her name was Sally and even though she had a bloody mark on her head and wore strange old fashioned clothing, she was sweet and told Kenzie lots of stories.

She had been afraid when Kenzie first came to the playground as she felt she couldn’t swing on her favorite seat anymore. But she warmed up when Kenzie offered to sit in the one next to her so her haunted seat would be open again. They became fast friends after that - lots of spooks were scary but Sally was more like Uncle Ben and she seemed lonely which Kenzie could currently relate to.

“My dad said that you shouldn’t be with us - someone should keep you away. I think he’s right - you’re a freak!” Trent shouted.

Kenzie stepped off of her swing set, glancing back at Sally who had her face covered nervously at the interaction. She moved towards him on the defensive - she felt so angry but she had to keep that fire inside from flaring up- it was difficult and she could feel her body heating up as a response.

She walked up to him.

“Get away from me!” He yelled and tried to push her down.

She ducked just like her uncle Diego and Eudora taught her and smacked his open palms away, clocking him right in the face as hard as she could - He stumbled backwards but then lunged forward. Kenzie was faster and she tackled him to the ground where she would have better leverage to incapacitate him.

They wrestled for a short period of time then Kenzie punched him again and he rolled over and started wailing. Kenzie looked around at the other kids on the playground as they backed away nervously.

Before she understood what was happening, a very upset teacher ran over and she was escorted to the principal’s office with a scolding.

**********************************************************************************************

“Honestly - I think that 3 months is actually pretty good given our family’s tendencies.” Ben deadpanned as he and Klaus walked quickly through the halls of the elementary school. It was early afternoon and after they got the call they took an Uber from the shop to get here. Over 5 years sober and Klaus still wouldn’t get behind the wheel of a car.

“Please - I never got into fights, even when dad tried to throw me into them. And neither would you.”

Ben scoffed, “You wouldn’t fight but we both know you started most of them.”

Klaus waved him off and Ben went invisible as they walked into the principal’s office - Kenzie was sitting two seats away from a boy in her class - she was staring nervously at the floor and swinging her legs.

Klaus was on his knees next to her a second later, his hands moving over her face, checking her over for injuries, “Are you okay?! Kenzie - What happened?”

She didn’t have any marks on her - not a scratch even though her T shirt had some dirt on it. The kid next to her, however, was sporting a black eye - his face smeared with mud and a bandaid over one of his elbows. He was pouting dejectedly at the new arrivals.

“She tried to gouge my eyes out!” He whined.

“Okay, kid - don’t be dramatic-”

“Klaus.” Ben warned.

“No- I did - But I was just trying to incapacitate him!” She said, using her thumbs to mime poking two eyes out - in a suspiciously similar way that the old posters from their childhood portrayed disabling an attacker.

Klaus pressed her hands down, “Shh… Never admit guilt - remember? Plead the fifth, baby. Plead the fifth.” he whispered.

“Kenzie - what were you thinking? You can’t attack people, you know that.” Ben stepped up to scold her since it took Klaus exactly 2 seconds to fall back on his old criminal survival techniques.

“He started it!” Kenzie nearly stood up, pleading with Ben and pointing at the other kid.

“There’s nobody there, freak!” The other child snapped.

“Yes, there is - my uncle Ben! I’m not a freak!” Kenzie jumped up ready to fight again, this time getting stopped by her father.

“Easy pumpkin-” He put a hand up towards the boy, “And you - don’t call people freaks, that’s very rude!”

The door opened and a man in a business suit walked inside with a huff, it only took him a moment to observe the scene then rush forward towards, presumably, his son. “I swear to god - if your little mutant laid a finger on my boy, we’re going to have a big problem, Hargreeves.”

He knelt down to observe his son’s black eye, redness creeping up his neck into his cheeks.

“Excuse you - What did you just call my daughter?” Klaus stood up from his crouched position, his fists balled up at his sides.

The man did the same, walking up to face the other father “There’s a reason they kept you freaks away from the rest of us - And apparently it runs in the blood.” He sneered, gesturing to Kenzie who was watching this exchange with wide eyes.

“Klaus - You start something and it’s only going to hurt Kenzie - just wait for the principal to get in here and explain what happened.” Ben was standing guard between the men, although he wasn’t doing much good considering his brother’s eyes were sharp and locked onto the other offending parent. Flecks of blue were circling Klaus’ hands.

“I’m sorry- was your daddy a bank robber? Because, if so, my bad truly.”

“Screw you, freak.”

“That’s adorable - you must be so proud of your little white collar criminal in the making but maybe you should tell him what happens to snitches in the real world since he seems to be parroting the nonsense you spout at your sexually repressed wife in the evenings - Because my girl has every right to stand up for herself.”

The man stepped forward and pointed a threatening finger directly in Klaus’ face, “Big talk coming from a washed up child star freak turned crack whore. They should have never let a child of yours into this school.”

Klaus squared up like he was about to push the other man.

“Get him, momma!”

“Kenzie, no - Klaus NO.” Ben looked out the window, “Where are you, Dave…” He whined, his eyes scanning the parking lot.

“Gentlemen!” The principal - a friendly looking woman in a pantsuit - came out of her office to the scene boiling to a head. She glanced around the group, “I apologize for your wait - I was on a call. Anyway - please follow me, so we can get this straightened out.”

She clasped her hands together, “Let's all just act like adults, shall we?” She gestured for them to follow her into the office. Klaus and the other man glared at each other but they both took their children’s hands and silently trailed after the principal.

****************************************************************************************************

By the time the group exited the office - they were all feeling properly told off. Ben was impressed how Principal Cunningham cut through both his brother’s theatrical bullshit and the other man’s (Mr. Taylor) insistent ramblings and conspiracy theories. She didn’t have time for either of that - both kids were in trouble; Trent for bullying and Kenzie for fighting and they both received a week of suspension.

Taylor’s attitude made Ben nervous- there were lots of people who disliked the umbrella academy and subscribed the conspiracy theories about where they came from but they had never had to coexist with one of them - much less with Kenzie being accused of being a mutant or a government experiment.

He was dangerous because he was paranoid and scared of her even interacting with his son.

“Kenzie - go wait by the door while we have a grown-up conversation about some stuff for a second - okay?” Klasu patted her back as she dragged her feet to the entrance.

Klaus turned to his brother, “So what do we do now? Do we- I don’t know, ground her or something?”

Ben thought about it for a moment, “I guess? I mean - yeah- she can’t be starting fights at school. We need to set a clear boundary for that early. She’s only been here a few months - we don’t want this to become a pattern.”

“She didn’t start the fight- That tin foil hat junior did. He called her a freak, Ben! We need to deal with that! She’s probably so upset!”

Ben put a hand up, “We will- here’s what we’re going to do - We’ll ground her for fighting but we’ll talk to her about bullying. Just explain to her that next time-”

Klaus whined.

“--If there’s a next time.” Ben corrected himself, “She needs to walk away and get a teacher instead of throwing punches.”

Klaus sighed and nodded, “Okay, okay- yeah, we’ll do that. I think- Shit- what is she doing?” He pushed past his brother who twisted around to see what he was looking at. Kenzie had pushed open one of the glass entrance doors and was now walking out into the parking lot. They started jogging faster down the hall.

Klaus stopped when they could finally see out the doors, “It’s just Dave, thank fuck…”

Ben closed his eyes in relief, “Finally…” Then he continued, “So we’ve got a plan - no video games for a week but we play it cool ‘cause the other kid was a dick.”

By the time they made it out to the parking lot, Dave was crouched down talking with Kenzie who seemed to be handling this pretty well considering the circumstances but Klaus was fully upset by the entire situation - many of his own personal fears just coming to life in front of him after she had only been in school for a few months.

“Why don’t you meet us in the car, Kenz’?” She groaned - sick of all the adults talking about her but she drug her feet towards the vehicle anyway, Ben joined her and started getting her ready in the backseat.

“Sorry, I’m late - I tried to get here as soon as I could.”

“It’s okay - Just bullshit stuff, anyway.” He glanced up and added, “The little punk called her a freak - The father’s a lot of strong opinions about the umbrella academy and he’s indoctrinated his little spawn on all of them.”

Dave cringed, “Shit... You think it’s going to be a problem?”

Klaus pouted, “I don’t know… She didn’t do anything wrong! It’s just her name that gave it away - Maybe I should have, I don’t know, just made up a last name for her.”

“We both know it’s not because she’s a Hargreeves that she’s ‘special’ - Look, she probably scared the kid to death today - I doubt he’ll bother her again. Same goes for the rest of the kids.” He smiled and squeezed his boyfriend’s arm, “She’s the toughest kid out there.”

Klaus huffed, “Yeah… I just hate that she’s stuck with all the dumb shit I did in the past. It’s not fair.”

Before Dave could respond, a silver car drove past and the driver, Mr. Taylor, glared at them as he passed. Dave pulled an arm around Klaus in solidarity and held eye contact until the vehicle turned onto the road.

Klaus pressed into Dave’s side, flipping the back of the car off as it disappeared into traffic.

Dave kissed the side of his head, “Come on- Let’s go home.”

***********************************************************************************************

“Momma, why was that man being so mean?” Kenzie asked, as Klaus took out the pins keeping her hat firmly placed onto her head. It was their afternoon routine for him to help her get out of the beanie then brush out her hair.

She had been unusually quiet even when they grounded her, although she did put up a fight at that, especially when Dave put the games up too high for her to reach. But nothing was lit on fire and Klaus only cried for a few minutes alone in the bathroom afterwards so he considered it to a resounding success.

“Oh, some people are just bullies, Kenz’. They’re afraid of what they don’t understand and they get angry when they're afraid because they never learned to feel their emotions.” He sighed as he plucked the last pin out and lifted the beanie off of her head, revealing her horns and her flattened curls.

“Why are they afraid?” She reached up and rubbed at her horns as if making sure that they were still there.

Klaus inwardly cringed at the question, “Because… We’re a very special family and they don’t understand that. It’s wrong. Because you didn’t do anything wrong and I don’t want you taking their fear and anger and turning that into more hate but I know that it’s easy to do that.”

“Kenzie, you know you’re not a freak, right?” He had her brush and was tugging slowly away at her curls, fluffing them back up and untangling any rats’ nest that had been created over the course of the day.

She didn’t say anything.

He turned her around to look at her, fluffing up the sides of her hair, “Kenzie - That kid, what was his name?”

“Trent.”

“Typical… Trent doesn’t know anything about you, he was just repeating stuff his old man was mad about me for and it wasn’t right. I don’t want you to get into anymore fights but I’m very proud of you for standing up for yourself but next time, you come to me, okay? He was angry at me and what I’ve done, I don’t want you to have to suffer for that.”

She pouted, “Can I play my games, then?”

He huffed, “ ‘Fraid not, Kiddo - And don’t pressure me anymore because you know I’m weak. If you’re going to pressure anyone, do it to Uncle Ben - He’s got one of those spine things.”

She smiles a little as he turned her around towards the mirror to see her newly freed locks and horns. He hugged her, “I’m sorry you had to see that, Kenzie - Just know that they’re wrong, okay? Those things that make you special don’t make you scary or bad. They make you my Kenzie Kenz' - my pumpkin pie--” he kissed her rapidly on the cheek and tickled her until she started to giggle and squirm, “My most favoritest person in the whole world - You understand me?”

She cackled and fell back against him. Klaus levitated both of them up a few feet, “The things that make you special make you who you are, do you understand me, Kenzie Grace?”

She nodded.

“Fantastic! Now let’s go bother Dave until he feeds us…”

************************************************************************************
Kenzie waited for her father to sit down at the table with Dave and start talking before she casually walked past. She moved close and hugged him - he absently hugged her back, stroking her hair as he continued to talk to Dave about something she really didn’t care about.

She slipped her hand into his jacket pocket and pulled out his cell phone. Just like her momma taught her - she continued on without him noticing it’s absence and brought the phone into her room, plopping down on her bed and scrolling through his contacts.

She tapped the one she wanted and listened patiently while it rang, a few moments later a familiar voice picked up, “”What do you want?”

“Uncle Diego?”

His voice changed, “Oh- Hey Kenzie, is everything okay?”

She grabbed one of her pillows and hugged it against her chest, “Everything’s okay -I wanted to tell you that I got into a fight today.”

There was a pause on the other end, “You got into a fight today?”

“Uh- huh… Mom and Dave say I shouldn’t have punched him first…” She admitted.

There was a shuffling on the other end and she heard him muffle the phone, “Hey- fuck off- I’m busy, pal..” Then he returned to full volume, “Well, they’re your parents so they have to tell you that. It’s their job. But I’m your uncle so you know I’m always on your side.”

“Did you win?”

Kenzie's face broke out in a grin, “Yeah. I won.”

She could hear the smile in her uncle’s voice when he spoke again,

“That’s my girl!”