Chapter 3
It took hours for Booker to finally wake and when he did, he jerked up, as though waking from some nightmare.
Disoriented as he was, he did notice those he considered his family around him. All the emotions that he had been blocking out for the past months inundated him and he curled into himself; like he was trying to protect himself from physical blows.
Why were they here? It couldn't have been a hundred years yet, could it?
"Sebastien? We're here. May I sit near you?" Nicky paused as he shifted past Joe, towards him.
Booker did not respond. "We're here. We want you to come home." He continued
Again, there was no answer.
"Bastien... Can you look at me? Please?" Joe whispered, reaching out to touch Booker's shoulder, and stopping when Booker jumped hard, hitting his cranium on the headboard.
Slowly, Booker lifted his face and looked at them with tear-filled eyes. "What are you doing here?" He whimpered. "Why must you torment me so? Is it not enough that I dream of you? Dream of all that you do, but am not able to be with you? Is it not enough that--" Booker cut himself off abruptly.
Nile, about to ask what he was going to say, was abruptly cut off by Andy. "Book, how long do you think you have been here?"
He shrugged at Andy's question. "I know that it has not yet been a century."
"You have been in this house for close to three months... Book... What happened?"
"Nothing happ--"
"Don't you dare lie to us, Booker! Don't, just don't."
"Nile, mon cher, I'm not lying. No one did this to me."
"You did this to yourself? Why?"
Booker said nothing. He did not want them to pretend as they cared for him, because when they left him again, and they would, he knew, he would not survive it.
"Go...please go... Find me after my century is up. Find me then. Please." he beseeched. His voice rising a few octaves, reaching almost a howl. "GO!"
Even as he was shrieking for them to leave him, a part of Booker hoped that they would care enough to stay. They didn't.
All of them walked out as if he meant nothing to them. As though they did not have two centuries of history between them. He heard the door close and the feeling of abandonment crushed him and he started to sob. He could not breathe. He didn't want to. He wanted an escape from the all-consuming pain that he had been enduring for a century and a half.
Quynh left first, she understood that this was not her place. James following, but not before throwing a pointed look in Andy's direction asserting "don't leave him".
Nile, Joe and Nicky walked out concurrently, believing that Andy would handle the situation.
Booker's heart-wrenching sobs could be heard even through the closed door.
Andy walked silently towards the weeping man. He did not seem to have realised that he was not alone. She clambered on the bed and engulfed the younger immortal in a hug, attempting to reassure him.
Nothing seemed to work. She whispered softly to him, but his cries just went up in volume. She rubbed his back, but that just caused him to flinch.
He was trying to say something, but his wails made him incoherent.
When Booker felt someone's arms around him, he knew that it was Andy. He did not understand why she was there, all he knew that it brought him a certain relief that she was there. That Andy hadn't left him again. He knew that Andy thought that they both were kindred spirits. She was wrong. The only thing they shared was their longing to leave life. And now that Quynh was back, they did not even share that.
Quynh's return was why he started drinking again. They all had each other while he was left to rot alone. That was a thought that he could not stand, after all, he was a coward.
He tried to tell Andy that he wasn't worth it, that she should just leave him be, but his wails rendered him rambling.
Finally, he exhausted himself. His loud wails turned into mute tears and he sagged against Andy. She wanted to say something but knew that doing so would have no impact. So she remained quiet, just holding her little brother.
A few minutes later he was asleep.
Joe opened the door and peeked through it. Through the darkness of the room, she could make out the redness in his eyes and dampness on his cheeks.
One by one, they all entered the room in similar states. Nile sat on Booker's other side while Joe and Nicky made themselves comfortable at the foot of the bed.
Quynh sat beside Andy and let her drop onto her chest, silent tears saturating Quynh's clothes.
Copley had left, recognizing that this was not his place.
No one said a word. Joe, Nicky and Andy all blamed themselves for not noticing. All of them wondered what has happened. True, Booker was not the happiest of their group, but they did not know what this was. Was he sad? Or angry? Depressed?
They should have known. He was their brother and they should have known.