National City Rejects

As one might imagine, the immediate aftermath after freaking Supergirl announces a partial retirement (or at least a dramatic scaling back of duties) was... fraught to say the least. Since they no longer lived in National City, Lena and Maggie were thankfully spared the worst of it. After all, it had a relatively minor impact on their city. Beyond the occasional fly by or team up, Supergirl rarely appeared in the skies of Star City. Plus, after Lena’s little panic attack in the middle of the coffee shop, they had swiftly holed up in Lena’s swanky apartment, turned off all electronic devices and drunk themselves into a stupor.

There were tears, feelings, shouting, crying, cuddling, and eventually, exhausted ‘please I just need to feel happy for a few moments’ fucking.

The Monday morning after was...not much better. While the immediate fury and outrage from reactions had somewhat cooled, the morning news was filled with whiny assholes yelling about aliens not ‘earning their keep.’ That they had to pay back the generosity of the American taxpayers for welcoming them so completely into society. As if those same reactionaries hadn’t been calling for Supergirl's arrest and deportation for years. Even as time and time again she saved the world or did her best to fit into American society. As if they hadn’t been trying to systematically kill, cage, or dissect every new alien they could.

Maggie’s jaw was clenched in impotent rage the whole time. Having worked with Kara extensively, she knew the blood sweat and tears that went into the job. Knew the cost it had on her family and herself. Knew how much she deserved a rest after years of faithful service. She didn’t even get the RnR between tours of duty like soldiers were supposed to either. Everybody has a breaking point, and Maggie was just surprised something like this hadn’t happened yet.

Of course, Maggie’s frustration had nothing on the shout of rage snarling out of Lena when Lex sauntered onto National TV. His slimy charisma in full glow selling his faux disappointment and understanding. After all, he argued, wouldn’t Earth be better in the hands and protection of Earthlings. Poor weak alien minds just can’t handle making the hard calls needed to protect humanity. Sacrifices have to be made at some point. The illusion of perfection and consequence free heroism was of course more dangerous to humanity. After all, if people didn’t take responsibility for their own lives, how would we ever make progress as a society.

...Yeah, Maggie wisely chose change the channel after Lena’s glass of ‘fuck-it-it’s-9pm-somewhere’ scotch shattered against the wall and said woman collapsed into broken sobs.

Some other reactions were, of course, more sympathetic, if very rarely full of actual understanding. There was the seeming unending series of human interest stories of the profound effect Supergirl had on the daily lives of citizens. It was frankly stunning how truly many people owed their lives and livelihoods to the blonde who had never really asked for anything in return. It floored the two women to realize just how much sincere care and worry people felt about how she was doing. About how much they admire Kara’s strength and conviction. How much of a fixture she was in the minds of everyday people.

...about how very afraid they were now that the Super comfort blanket had been taken away. Please, oh please, they seemed to imply, could we just have it back now? Ha-ha-funny joke Supergirl, we need you!

Most, of course, probably didn’t mean anything hurtful about it. Fear was a perfectly reasonable reaction. For years the Supers had been more or less indomitable forces of nature that meant no situation was ever truly hopeless. Tired, in pain, about to be killed in a freak accident? Well, she couldn’t save everyone, but there was always a chance (a damn good chance actually) that the blonde would drop whatever she was doing and save you. Staring down the gun of a robber? Supergirl was probably seconds away, so if you just kept him talking and bought yourself some time you’d be okay. She was a symbol of compassion, of strength, of goddamn hope in the face of impossible odds.

Nothing was ever truly hopeless because Supergirl was likely on the way.

Now suddenly, people realized that she could bleed. That she likely had a life, family and people who care for her. That she had responsibilities and demands on her time outside of saving the city. That she was, essentially, human. With all the imperfections and fallibile foibles that entails.

...Privately, Maggie likened it to a press conference for little kids where Santa came out on National TV, pulled off his fake beard and told the kids their parents put the presents under the tree. The collective naive ignorant bubble most of society was living in popped dramatically.

All that was left was to decide what they could do to move forward now that a demi-god had been brought low. There were questions, oh so many questions. People wanted answers. Wanted surety. Wanted to know when Kara would be back. When the world could be made right again. When they could go back to normal where everything was great and wonderful.

Only, there was no going back to unscrew the pooch. Kara was essentially gone, and there were no silver coated words to make the hurt go away.

Personally at least, Lena and Maggie went back and forth at least twice a day. Lena was predictably eating herself up inside worrying about how much of this was her fault. As much as Maggie tried to reassure her, she also didn’t want to lie to Lena. While she highly doubted that Kara would quit being Supergirl over a nasty fight with one friend, she also knew how much the superhero relied on Lena to keep herself grounded. It was undeniable their split had, at least, left Kara partially less able to cope with whatever stress actually broke the camel's back.

As Maggie explained and reassured repeatedly, she personally their friend break up was probably one of Kara’s smaller worries.

No.

This had Alex stamped all over it.

The detective wasn’t even close to clear on the actual dynamic at play, but there was only ever really one button that could cause Kara to completely fall apart. The foster sister she so dearly clung to, the largest part of the small set of stable people that had never abandoned her for any reason when she came to earth. If it came down to it for some reason, Maggie knew that Kara would practically gut herself to make sure Alex was happy and healthy. If, for some reason, Alex laid down the law (perhaps over some serious threat to Kara’s life or something) Kara might, might concede. However, if it was something really important to the blonde, if lives were on the line, she did often stand up to Alex. Kara would have fought hard to stay working as Supergirl.

Which...unfortunately led to several much worse interpretations. If... if Alex was hurt or...y’know. Not around anymore? For..whatever reason? If that injury had something to do with humanities seeming need to assert that Kara didn’t belong and wasn’t welcome?

Fuck.

Maggie could see how that could lead to Kara drawing back and retiring.

Neither Lena or Maggiew were quite sure what to make of what they’d deduced. Both vacillated widely back and forth. As...strained as their relationships were to their respective Danvers sisters were, they both still cared about them. Alex might be Maggie’s ex, but she wasn’t heartless. She’d want to know if the redhead had ended up dead in a ditch somewhere. It had been a big worry during their relationship for both of them. Especially once Maggie started helping out a bit on cases and occasionally got into situations with alien compatants she was not equipped to deal with.

The ex-cop knew there was a damn good chance she’d probably already missed the funeral if the worst had happened. Who would have thought to call the ex they hadn’t heard from in years in the middle of their grief? She just...would really rather know instead of wondering ‘what if?’ A small, despondent part of her also wondered if there might be any tykes now looking for a new home. Alex did, of course, want terribly to be a mother. It’s what broke them up. Maggie couldn’t say whether she felt more sick thinking she’d died without ever accomplishing the dream, or if she did just after leaving her kids orphans. They hadn’t split long enough ago for a possible kid to have even started school yet. She just…

Didn’t want to think of Alex’s kids getting put in the system. Or Kara throwing out her dreams and goals to take care of them. If there was ever a reason to retire as Supergirl, a couple of vulnerable kids would be it.

Lena on the other hand…

Well, she might not be particularly mad at Kara anymore, but she also couldn’t help but feel hurt. The lack of trust had made her wonder if they really were as close friends as she thought they were. Maggie assured her that Kara practically worshipped the ground Lena walked on but… well, niggling, vicious little voices in one’s head were hard to silence. Lena never had been a paragon of self-esteem and the whole thing had kicked her while she was down. Even lacking the anger, the CEO just...couldn’t decide whether or not it was worth it to put on her big girl panties and call Kara to see if she was alright. Every few hours her worry for the blonde would get bad enough that she’d pick up the phone and have the number half dialled...only to drop it again a second later.

Would Kara even want to hear from her after all this time? After the CEO had practically ripped out her heart? After all the venom she’d spewed? Would she just be adding to the clearly crushing burdens Kara faced everyday as Supergirl? Just one more thing to manage. One more person to try and appease? She couldn’t stand it if Kara ended up just putting up with her. If she didn’t actually want Lena around. If she didn’t actually trust Lena. The pure, unadulterated fear bubbling away in her veins was crippling.

Kara hadn’t, after all, even tried to reach out after their fight. Kara probably could have gotten one of her hacker friends to find Lena’s new number. Lena was mostly convinced that Kara had completely given up on her.

...Needless to say, procrastinating about painful but necessary phone calls became a favorite hobby of both women.

For the next week they spent basically every evening camped out together at one of their apartments or the other. Each tried to comfort the other. Each failed miserably. Each switched between obsessively checking the news for non-existent updates and just trying to bury their heads in the sand. They were...stuck.

Still, they had to know.

Maggie was the first to break. They’d both been sitting side by side on the ratty old couch in Maggie’s apartment. Neither were really paying attention to the 9-o’clock news playing on the TV. They were both staring at their phones laid out on the coffee table in front of them, trying to work up the gumption to actually pick it up and dial.

It took three heartstopping calls to an old number before Maggie got through.

“This is Danvers.” A gruff, tired, distracted but still thankfully okay voice crackled through Maggie’s phone. Which, well, Maggie let out a deep, relieved breath at that. Worst case scenario wasn’t on the table. Good. Yes. Fuck. It’d been so long since she’d heard Alex’s familiar and comfortably grouchy voice.

Words escaped her though. How the fuck are you supposed to call your ex out of the blue and ask “Hey I saw your sister on the TV, are you dead?” She really, really, thinks she should have gotten a better opening line in her brain before she just smashed her finger on the call button.

“Who is this? How did you get this number?” Alex barked out gruffly, now seeming to pay more direct attention.

Which, well, right, words are needed. Words to figure out this mess.

“A-Alex?” Maggie said softly.

“Maggie?!” Alex shouted back in surprise and excitement, making the ex-cop wince and pull the phone back from her ear just a smidge.

“Yeah, uh, yeah, it’s me.” The ex-cop replied, feeling the ghost of a nostalgic but nervous smile ghost her face. Dimly she felt Lena shift to press her warm body up against her side, so she gave the CEO’s knee a reassuring squeeze.

“Um, okay. Yeah. Right. Would you uh, why did you call?” Alex said, stumbling over her words in that adorable awkward nerd cadence she had always tried to pretend she didn’t have.

“Well, I was just, you know, with the news out of National City going crazy and all. I was just, uh, wondering how you were doing with you know, everything.” Maggie replied, idly massaging Lena’s thigh with her free hand.

Fuck. This was awkward. Why was this so awkward. Why can’t a lady call up her possibly dead ex and not have it be awkward. Fuck.

“Awww, are you worried about me now the girl of steel is off duty Sawyer?” Came a teasing, pleased voice out of the speaker. Maggie could practically see the fucking shit eating grin the secret agent must have been flashing her.

Brat.

A long hollow part somewhere in Maggie’s heart ached at the echo of casual competitiveness she used to have with her.

“Sue me why don’t you? We may not have worked as a couple, but I still care about you alright? I don’t- I was just a bit worried. It’s not a big thing.” Maggie said, huffing petulantly. A quick glance over to Lena revealed the deeply amused smirk on her face. Fuck, the CEO was pretty. Also, she was a bitch who was rapidly coming to know all of Maggie’s eccentricities and buttons. Her whole thing about things and feelings.

Despite the fear that thought and it’s accompanying feelings brings, Maggie can’t help but be happy about how things are playing out between them.

There was a brief moment of startled silence on the phone.

“Uh, Yeah, alright fair. I uh, I care about you too. It’s been...well it’s been a bit busier around here. I’ve had to pull some overtime that my fiance Kelly is not at all happy about, but y’know, we are getting by.” Alex started explaining a bit hesitantly. Maggie felt a bit of a tang of sourness at the mention of a new fiance, but honestly...it had been years at this point. It was more awkward than anything else, and not even for a really good reason.

Still, with how not at all stressed or worried Alex sounded, Maggie felt a bit more confused and hopeful. If something hadn’t gone wrong with Alex, what happened to Kara?

“-know, it’s just a bit of an annoying situation. I mean, I probably shouldn’t say too much, cause, classified government organization, but we didn’t really get any warning. Real nice of Supergirl. Real nice. I’m starting to see why the Colonel has such a bee up her bonnet about her, honestly.” Alex continued on. Her annoyed growl served to snap Maggie back to attention after the ex-cop had zoned out thinking. Which after a moment to mentally catch up in the conversation...didn’t really make much sense. Something about how the leaked article came out before the agency had even gotten official notice from the Superheroine and how annoying that was.

“What do you mean? How’s Kara? What happened to her? ” Maggie asked, honestly scratching her head. A glance over to Lena showed the CEO staring at her in wide-eyed astonishment.

“Why are you bringing up Kara? She’s fine to my knowledge. Still working away at Catco last I heard, trying for that pulitzer. I haven’t heard from her in a few weeks, but I’ll see her at Christmas. Just like normal.” Alex queried, her voice going high with a snort of amusement like she heard a weird non-sequitur.

Maggie felt herself pale, turning to face Lena with her jaw practically hanging on the floor. The CEO wasn’t looking too much better either.

“And that's...normal?” Maggie whispered, her tone incredulous.

“Yeah? I mean, of course, we haven’t been as close as we were in college since her job at Catco really started to pick up, but that’s pretty normal for the last few years. Why, what’s up?” Alex replied, her tone full of exasperation. As if Maggie’s confusion was just this incredibly weird, out of character quirk.

Maggie cursed under her breath.

“Oh nothing, just thought you were a bit closer than that is all. I was a bit worried you were stressing about how she was handling the whole thing is all. I remember how much of a mother hen you could be at times.” Maggie said, trying to keep the shock, panic, and utter terror from her tone.

Based on the sharp look Lena sent her, along with the subtle tremble she noticed in her fingers, Maggie wasn’t doing the best of jobs.

“Oh, well, I might like to be, but we are both just such busy people. You know, the DEO is always kicking my ass, and life as a star reporter barely lets her sleep. We text every couple weeks and catch up. I’ll call her though, let her know you're worried. She’ll be touched.” Alex replied, her voice practically smiling. Maggie couldn’t help but let out a hum of agreement.

Clearly, whatever else had happened, the Danvers sisters still loved each other. It’s just that something...else had happened

“Look, uh, I’m late for dinner with Kelly, I’m gonna have to let you go. It was...nice chatting to you though. Good to know you're still kicking around out there.” Alex hurriedly said, breaking the moment. Maggie sucked in a startled gasp.

“Good to talk to you as well. Don’t be a stranger.” Maggie replied before the line abruptly cut off.

“What. The. Fuck.” Lena spat out, jumping to her feet to begin pacing back and forth. Maggie wrung her hands once before following her up and wrapping her arms around the CEO’s trembling shoulders. As if a light switch was hit, the brunette spun around in her arms and clung desperately to her.

“Took the words right out of my mouth.” Maggie replied, humming soothingly and running her hands up and down the soft skin of Lena’s arms.

“Something must have happened. That’s...that's not normal. Kara and Alex were inseparably close. That’s just...that’s just not possible.” Lena spat out, her voice halfway between a hiss and a wail.

“No. No that’s not normal. Something must have happened.” Maggie said, mentally counting the I-told-you-so even if she’d never say it out loud to a clearly panicking Lena.

She’s a detective after all. She detects...and keeps from poking the bear when at all possible.

In a rush Lena spun back around to snatch up her phone. Without giving herself a single second more to hesitate the woman tapped in Kara’s old phone number and hit dial.

It rung.

-and rung.

-and rung.

-and rung until Kara’s cheery answering message turned on.

Not wasting a second Lena hung up and dialed again.

-and again.

-and again.

-and again.

“Fuck.”