How Interesting

I am at a bit of impasse here. As the overwhelming desire to simply fade from existence starts to fade, it becomes quite clear that this is not a normal circumstance. How did this happen I wonder? It’s interesting I suppose lying in my sister’s arm instead of her laying in my arms.

I suspect it would be lie to say the feeling of my sister hugging me is all bad. It feels quite nice actually. I wonder is this why Ririka cries so often? Or does she always just feel like I did? Hmm. I’ll ask her later when I’m in a less precarious place. I do not wish for my spine to be broken today. I wonder could I simply leave right now? Would she attempt to stop me? I have noticed her patience growing thin, so I wouldn’t be surprised if she stopped me from leaving. It’d be interesting if she did, but I really wish she doesn’t. Perhaps I should simply wait for her to fall asleep. Yes a lovely solution. Ririka has always been weak to the whims of sleep.

“Don’t.” Oh my it seems that plan simply won’t work. I’ll just tease her a little, so she’ll let me leave. I have much to think about after-all. Those eyes flash back in my mind; I shiver. Yes much to think about.

“Whatever could you be referring to.” Her grip on me tightens for a moment before relaxing. Anger perhaps?

“I can feel you scheming.” Is this the so called psychic teen bond people speak oh? How amusing.

“Oh can you now?”

“Yes. What happened?” What happened indeed I wonder? I began to swim with my favorite fish then tried to pretend as if it weren’t so. To play two roles it was bound to end up with such a result. Even I cannot have it both ways. Then I wonder which would I prefer to swim or to watch?

“A small argument. I simply overreacted.” I start to slip away from her arms. Yes simply an argument I slipped up. It doesn’t matter though Sayaka will be back. Will she, now? Her eyes said otherwise. I will see I suppose. I don’t want to wait.

“What did you do?” Oh Ririka you are simply too cruel, and you know me all too well.

“I asked about Terano ask as you advised.” There’s a pause. Her eyes are soft still perhaps a little teasing will her fix that.

“And why did you fight?” Fight isn’t quite the word I would use, but I suppose it’s fine.

“I simply requested that Sayaka stop this relationship with Terano.” Quite reasonable if I might add. Her reaction was odd to say the least. And It hurt.

“What did she say?” No. Oh Sayaka you’re rebellious stage fits you so well, but it hurts me. Nothing to worry about; she’ll be back tomorrow morning.

“She refused.” Ririka nods her head.

“Why?” Why? Hmm. I couldn’t say for sure.

“I don’t know.” Ririka looks rather disgruntled at that answer, but she schools her face back into that soft face. I hate it. Just a little more, and she’ll blow up. Not soon enough though this conversation has grown dull. Certainly a little meltdown will liven it up.

“Well why was she in the partnership in the first place?” An interesting question indeed perhaps I’ll hold off on the teasing. The first answer that pops into my head is Midari’s words. No. That cannot be why. Terano is just about the most dull girl ever; Sayaka would never be interested in such a girl. Then why? Who could say? Sayaka I suppose.

“I’m not sure.”

“And it’s safe to assume that you didn’t ask?” Even now her tone is soft. It doesn’t irritate me this time. Too nervous. No that can’t be right. Nerves are curious things aren’t they, both types, but I don’t get nervous. A lie. No.

“No I suppose I didn’t.”

“Why?” Why indeed? I didn’t even think of it. It’s strange I have always been impulse, I mean who wouldn’t want to be, but in that room it’s wasn’t my usual impulsiveness. It was something different. I was barely thinking. How interesting it was to truly lose control. Did I like it though ? Hmmm.

“I was not interested.” She frowns then sighs in resignation.

“It’s okay you know. It’ll be fine. I’m sure she’ll be waiting for you tomorrow morning.”

Yes I’m sure of this too.

——————-

I have always considered those who sleep a lot to be weak as well as those who couldn’t sleep at all. I mean why wouldn’t you be able do to something you want? I will never understand others inability to do as they desire; however, I wouldn’t dare deny its intrigue. Yet despite what I have always thought sleep tonight I didn’t sleep. And not because of a new interesting event or because I wanted to. No I just simply couldn’t stop my mind from thinking of Sayaka.

Everything about her. Her smile. Her eyes. The look before she slammed the door shut. Her touching Terano. Looking at her longingly.

It should have been a rather amusing image, but it made me feel sick. And kept me up. How unusual.

“It’ll be fine, Kirari.” Her words mean nothing. We’ll be out of the car in under a minute. I’ll see Sayaka, she’ll apologize, and I’ll—Apologize for what? I hate that. That I thought that. It’s sick.

The door is opening. It’ll be fine. I’ll apologize, and Sayaka will forgot Terano.

She’s not there.
Its fine.
Probably in the Studnet Council Room.

It’ll be fun. Teasing her for not waiting for us. She’ll do her blush, and it’ll be entertaining. Yes. This is interesting. I start walking faster.

“Kirari.” I ignore it. I keep walking. Nothing else matters. I wonder where will she be. Does it matter? No. Will she bow? That doesn’t matter either.

The door is close now. I walk faster. I don’t hesitate before swinging it open. Perhaps it’ll startl—it’s empty.

No that’s quite right is that. There is a single item out of place. A black object. It’s clear what it is, what it means. Her taser.

She’s not coming back. It hurts. It burns.

“Kirari I am sure you can fix th—“ I raise my hand to silence her. No there is no way. I deserve it. Who would I be if I did not follow my own standards of facing your punishment for failure? Nothing, I’d be nothing.

“I’m not interested in fixing it. You can leave if you would like.” There’s a brief pause before she leaves. I sit in my chair.

Why am I even here?