Secrecy
Kaito's heart was pounding in his chest. He was seriously about to do this. Sure, going on a space expedition was scary, but exposing his friends' deepest secrets was downright terrifying. Were they his friends? Kaito wasn't exactly sure. Well, they wouldn't be his friends after this. He felt a pain in his chest that wasn't due to his condition. Even if the others didn't view him as their friend, Kaito viewed them as his. That made what he was about to do even more heinous.
Kaito returned to the same hallway as his previous conversations. He felt like there was an easier way to contact them, but the routine was somewhat comforting, strangely enough. Here he was in space, taking comfort in the repeated action of yelling at the government back on earth through a hallway. Life was strange.
Kaito blamed nerves for what happened next. His palms were sweating, and his mind was spiraling. Choosing the perfect way to piss off the superiors was a thousand times harder with the additional fear. He'd settled on yelling either, "Wanna fight?!" or "Fuck off!" but what came out was neither of those things.
"WANNA FUCK?!" Kaito blurted, before slapping a hand over his mouth. He groaned, well that was certainly threatening. He'd never been the best under stress.
He heard a crackle of static from the comms, but nothing else. Presumably whoever was currently on the other end had no idea how to react to that either.
"Uh, my bad." Kaito said sheepishly. Wait, no he wasn't going to apologize! He was trying to piss them off. "I mean, no! I'm not sorry!" If Kokichi was here, he would have been in hysterics.
"Do you need something, Mr. Momota?" The woman's voice was a surprisingly welcome sound. Now Kaito was getting somewhere.
"Yeah! Fuck you!" Kaito yelled, reaching for his previous anger, hoping that it could overwhelm the fear. "Bitch!"
"Excuse me?" To Kaito's surprise, his petty insults seemed to have genuinely struck a nerve.
"Yeah, useless whore!" If his grandmother was there, she would have shoved a bar of soap in his mouth. She was a fan of the old ways.
"Mr. Momota, I suggest you think clearly about what you are doing." The woman said coldly.
Thinking clearly was out of the window at this point, and Kaito's anger was flowing freely now. Even if this would hurt his friends at first, he was trying to save them. He had to believe in that. "I'm done! No more listening to your bullshit orders! I'm taking over this mission and doing it my way!" As soon as he'd said the words, Kaito wondered what it would be like if he really did commandeer the mission.
"Have you forgotten the information we hold in our hands?"
No, Kaito had most certainly not forgotten. He was getting closer, he had to be aware of not going too far now. He just wanted the secrets released, nothing else.
"Do it, I fucking dare you!" he snapped, crossing his arms. "I don't believe you have anything. You're bullshitting."
"Last. Chance." The woman's tone was colder than it had ever been before. Now it was downright frigid.
Kaito took a deep breath. No going back now. "You can shove your so called secrets up my ass!" Shit, that didn't come out right. Kaito quickly backpedaled. "I mean up your ass! Shove it up your ass!"
There was a moment of silence. Kaito waited, heart beating painfully in his chest. Crap, was he going to have an episode now? No, he had to hold on just a little longer...
Finally, the woman spoke again. "If you believe I am still bluffing as you said, check your datapad. Then we'll see who's bullshitting." The comm clicked off, but Kaito was no longer standing in the hallway. He was rushing for the nearest bathroom.
Kaito had barely closed the door before he doubled over, forcefully expelling blood, painting it across the bathroom floor. He didn't have time to reach the sink before several other waves of retching overtook him. He sank to his knees, hacking and choking, barely keeping himself upright. His chest burned worse than it ever had before. With a final effort, Kaito retched once more, expelling blood that was an even deeper red than before.
Shit, he was getting worse. There was no denying it. He had been able to lie to himself before, that the episodes weren't actually worse, that was just his body adjusting to space. But this, blood this color meant he was close to, or had already entered the last stage of the illness. It was bound to happen eventually, he had been battling this his whole life. In a way he was lucky. Others lasted months, even weeks, and he had lasted years. But he had never really thought about reaching this point. Everything became so much more real.
Was he going to die?
Kaito slowly stood, glancing at himself in the mirror. Jeez, he looked like he'd been to war and back. Blood trickled from his nose freely. He was vaguely reminded of Rantaro, when he'd first gotten sick. Kaito felt himself feel slightly satisfied. At least his friends didn't have to suffer like this. At least they could do what he never would, fully recover.
Cleaning up took longer than what Kaito would have liked. His body still felt weak and heavy, and he stumbled and nearly fell several more times. At long last he had erased any evidence from the bathroom and himself. He slowly unlocked the door-
Crying. He heard crying.
Kaito slowly made his way around the corner, arriving at the shut door of a storage closet. Soft sobs were coming from inside. Kaito raised a hand and knocked on the door, unsure of what else to do.
"It's occupied." A small voice said. That gave Kaito a surprise.
"Himiko? Are you ok?" Kaito asked. Was she still on the sicker end of the spectrum? "Hey, open the door. Please?"
"No." Her voice was muffled. "I'm staying in here forever."
Kaito slowly slid down until he was sitting, back against the door. "If you say so, but I'm gonna stay here too then."
"Why?" Himiko sniffled.
"Because I'm the captain and you're my crewmate." Kaito said. He heard a shuffling sound and slid away from the door as Himiko slowly opened it. She still didn't look exactly healthy, but she was healthy enough to make her way to the closet by herself. Tears stained her cheeks, and her eyes were puffy and red.
"There. I opened the door. Now can you go away?" Himiko asked, dragging a hand under her dripping nose.
"Well, now I can't. You're clearly not ok." Kaito said. "What happened?"
Himiko shook her head, clutching something close to her chest. Upon closer inspection, Kaito realized it was her datapad. And then it hit him.
"Your secret." Kaito said, feeling a wave of guilt wash over him.
"They're lying." Himiko said, voice quavering. "It's not true."
Gently, Kaito pried the datapad to her fingers, looking at the page open. It was boldly titled: The Secret of Himiko Yumeno. Kaito began to read.
Himiko Yumeno, the Ultimate Magician. From a young age, she trained under the delusional stage magician [Redacted], who convinced her that like him, she was capable of genuine magic. Despite ultimately surpassing her master's skill on the stage, Yumeno continued the delusion that she was truly magical. The most magical thing about her performances was her ability to create excuses to defend why she was indeed, a user of true magic. Even when her master died a horrific death, she maintained that both she and he were magical, despite him dying due to a lack of magic. He died a horrible death while she watched, believing that he would survive due to his so called magic. She could have helped him, but the delusional girl stood and watched, letting him die. Himiko Yumeno is a stage magician. She is not, nor has ever been a mage. There is nothing magical about Yumeno. She is merely a delusional girl. Himiko Yumeno cannot do magic.
When Kaito looked back up at Himiko, she burst into a fresh wave of tears. "They're lying, they're lying." She wailed. "He was magic, an anti mage stole his powers, that's why he died! It wasn't my fault! I'm a mage too! They're lying, I'm a mage!"
Kaito said nothing, only pulling the small girl closer to him. She sobbed into his chest, shoulders shaking. "They're lying, they're lying." Himiko repeated.
Kaito held her close, still saying nothing, just letting her release the emotions she had repressed for so long. The guilt he had felt was immense, and until now he had been under the impression that no one believed that Himiko was really capable of magic. He had been wrong, there was one person that believed more than anything, and that was Himiko herself.
Kaito wasn't sure how long they sat there for, and it didn't matter. He had set this in motion, and he was going to be there as long as Himiko needed. Slowly, her tears subsided into soft sniffles, her mantra lapsing into silence. Finally, she looked up at Kaito.
"Hey." He said gently.
"Hi." She said back. "D-do you believe me?"
Kaito chose his words carefully. "I believe it wasn't your fault. It wasn't your fault at all. And yeah, I think they got it wrong. There's lots of magical things about you Himiko."
"So you think I can do magic?" Himiko asked softly.
"Yeah." Kaito said, grinning. "You can do magic. You have your own special magic, and no matter what anyone says, no one can take that away."
Himiko's eyes filled with tears again. "R-really?"
"Really." Kaito said. "You're always gonna be magical to me."
Himiko buried her face into his chest again. "Thank you. You're the best captain ever. I'll use my magic to protect you forever."
"And you're the best mage." Kaito said. When Himiko looked back up at him, he could see in her eyes that her whole world was still shattered, but she was starting to heal. It would take a long time, but Kaito was confident that she would be ok.
"I left the others." Himiko said suddenly. "Angie, Tenko, Kiyo and I were feeling better, so we went back to the comms room. Then we got the secrets."
"Did you see anyone else's?" Kaito asked. Himiko shook her head.
"No, I only saw my name and tapped on it. Then I ran away."
"Did anyone else read any?"
"I don't know. I'm s-sorry." For a moment, Himiko looked like she was going to cry again. Suddenly, she steeled herself. "But I'm going to help you find them. I promise."
"Good." Kaito said, getting to his feet, and holding out his hand. "I'm gonna need my right hand mage."
Himiko took his hand and he pulled her to her feet. "Then I'm right here."
Kaito's heart nearly stopped when he saw Kirumi's slumped over form. The Ultimate Maid was sprawled out on the ground, unconscious.
"Holy shit!" Kaito yelled, dropping to the ground. Himiko followed suit.
"She's sleeping." Himiko said, picking something up off the ground. "Look, a sleeping potion."
It was a syringe, most likely filled with sedative. "Someone knocked her out." Kaito said, feeling chilled. Shit, the others. Kaito whirled to the sickbay ...only to smash face first into the doors.
"You're supposed to wait for them to open." Himiko said.
"They're locked!" Kaito said, peering inside. He could see almost all of the others, minus Shuichi, Korekiyo, Angie, Tenko, Kirumi, himself and Himiko. The others appeared to be asleep. Kaito had a feeling that they had been sedated too.
"Who locked it?" Himiko asked, looking terrified.
"I don't know, but we should get to cover." Kaito said. "Help me with Kirumi, we gotta move her to somewhere safe-"
"Please step away from the sacrifice!" Kaito whirled to see Angie smiling at them brightly.
"Angie!" Himiko cried. "You're ok!" Before she could run to the other girl, Kaito grabbed her shoulder.
"Wait."
Angie regarded them with a strange look in her eye. "Nyahaha! I was wondering where you went! That's everyone then! Now come, come, let me put you into a lovely sleep."
"You did this?!" Kaito exclaimed. "Why?!"
"Himiko, my dear friend." Angie said, addressing the shorter girl. "Come to me and Atua, everything will be alright, I promise."
"Himiko don't." Kaito said. "Angie, what the hell's going on?!"
"Can you not hear Atua's voice? Secrets were given that were not meant to be heard." Angie said, stepping forward. She spotted Himiko's datapad. "Oh dear, I thought we destroyed them all."
Kaito was momentarily stunned. Angie had done this to protect her secret? He really hadn't thought of all of the possible consequences, had he?
"Angie, I promise, whatever it is, it'll be ok." Kaito said. "Whatever it says, I'll be here to support you. I promise."
"Angie, please." Himiko begged.
Angie looked conflicted, before closing her eyes and clasping her hands. She muttered under her breath in a language Kaito didn't understand. Was she...praying? When she looked back over at them, Angie looked just as conflicted.
"Atua must be sleeping. I must handle this on my own, for my people, for him." She looked at them sadly. "Please do not struggle." She drew two more needles from a hidden pocket.
"Go, go!" Kaito yelled, pushing Himiko towards the exit. He had to leave Kirumi. As much as the thought plagued him, she was possibly safer than they were.
"Why is she doing this?!" Himiko cried.
"Get to Kokichi's room." Kaito replied, leading the way. Hopefully it would still be open, the way Kaito had left it. Thankfully, he was correct. He pulled Himiko inside, closing the door, hoping that Kokichi's additional locks would activate.
"But what about Tenko and Kiyo!" Himiko asked, looking frantic.
"I don't think she chased us." Kaito said. He was pacing back and forth. "Shit, shit!" He turned back to Himiko, who was shaking. "Gimme your datapad!"
Himiko slowly handed it over. Kaito closed out of the page containing Himiko's secret, which brought him to a list containing all of his crewmate's names. He saw his own, but resisted the urge to click on it. Instead he scrolled to Angie's.
The Secret of Angie Yonaga: It is obvious by the accent and skin tone that Ms. Yonaga is not from Japan. Her home is a small island nation known as [Redacted] located in [Redacted]. The nation of [Redacted] has a complex religion surrounding a deity known as Atua. While the religion is greatly mocked, leading to the isolation of the [Redacted] people, it is a genuine historical practice, stripped from most of history. The exact cause is unknown, but many figures have stated that any and all practitioners of [Redacted] are dangerous and to be treated as enemies of the country. Yonaga is known as an oracle (rough translation) of her people, a powerful spiritual figure responsible for speaking to her god, and delivering its messages. Due to the uses of ritualistic sacrifice, blood magic, and other extreme practices, Yonaga is an extremely dangerous figure, who's actions serve to prove the need for a mass extermination of the [Redacted] people. Angie Yonaga is a dangerous religious figure.
"What the fuck?!" Kaito yelled. "They're talking about genocide?!" His rage burned hotter than ever. "Christ, she's trying to protect her religion and people."
"She put everyone to sleep so they couldn't read her secret." Himiko said slowly.
"I gotta talk to her." Kaito said, standing up. He returned Himiko's datapad to her. "Stay here."
"No." Himiko shook her head. "She's my friend. I want to come."
"Are you sure?" Kaito asked. A million arguments raced through his head, but he wasn't able to voice any of them.
"Yes." Himiko nodded. "She's not a bad person. She told me lots about her island and Atua."
"Ok." Kaito said. "Then let's go." Together, the two dashed out of Kokichi's room, and back towards the sickbay, calling Angie's name.
Angie was waiting where they had left her. Everything was the same, except for the disappearance of Kirumi. Had Angie moved her inside the sickbay?
"I thought you'd return!" Angie said. "How delightful! You've seen reason."
"Angie, we gotta talk-" Kaito started, but the artist cut him off, a terrifying expression taking over her face.
"You read it." Her eyes were dark, her smile sinister. "I see. This is unfortunate."
"No, it's not." Kaito said. "Angie, listen to me-"
"Listen to what? Are you going to tell me my beliefs are wrong? Filthy? Immoral?" She slowly stepped closer. "That I and my people are monsters? Demons? None of you understand. We are peaceful. The only blood we shed is the blood of the willing. We are not occultists. We are not a cult."
Kaito almost mentioned how her charismatic insistence of her religion was cult-like, but decided to keep his mouth shut.
"But you do not believe me." Angie said, still coming closer. "You see evil, darkness, I work hard to explain to you, but you do not listen. Atua teaches us to embrace all, even those who do not believe. He is a loving god, a creator, not a destroyer! We are no threat to you!" Her voice was raising in pitch. "Why can't you leave us alone! We have done nothing to you! We only wish to practice in peace, and welcome those who wish to join us!"
"Angie." Kaito said, quieter this time. "You're right, I don't know. I don't know what it's like for you, but I believe you. You don't have to justify anything to me."
"Lies." Angie said, still smiling.
"He's not lying." Himiko said in a small voice. "Angie, I know you're not a bad person. We've spent hours talking about Atua and your island. We all wanted to visit, remember? Me and Tenko and Kiyo. We believe you."
"Oh Himiko." A despairing expression crossed over Angie's face. "I am so sorry, I must protect my people. It is my duty as the oracle-"
"Then let me help." Kaito said. "You're right, I don't understand your religion, but I'm willing to listen and try to understand as best as I can. I'd rather die before I let those bastards do anything to your home."
"Atua guide me, I do not know what to do." Angie said softly. For the first time, she appeared small and helpless.
"C-can I tell you a story?" Himiko asked in a shaky voice. "You said Atua loves stories."
Angie's eyes filled with tears. "Yes, he does."
"Then I'll tell you one." Himiko said, and she told hers, everything Kaito had read, and more. He stood quietly, waiting. When Himiko finished, the syringes fell from her hand.
"I've made a grave mistake." she said quietly. "In trying to prove our peacefulness I became what the lies said."
"You were worried." Kaito said, "And honestly, you handled it peacefully...ish. They're just sleeping."
"The most painful part was the needle." Angie said. "And they will awaken in a few hours."
"See, no harm no foul." Kaito said. "Look, I don't think attacking people with needles is the right way to go, but you didn't have another choice, not one you could see." Kaito said. "I'm never gonna understand what it's like for you and your people, but tell me what I can do to help, and I will."
"Then I will trust you." Angie said finally, eyes downcast. Seeing Angie without a smile was strange to Kaito.
Himiko moved forward and hugged the artist. "It's ok."
"Where's everyone else?" Kaito asked. "Where did Kirumi go?" Then something hit him. "Wait, you said Kirumi was a sacrifice, but you also said your people don't use anyone who's unwilling for rituals."
"She was not a sacrifice for Atua." Angie said, shaking her head. "Oh we made a grave mistake."
"You and Atua are fine." Kaito said.
"Atua is not the we." Angie said. "We made a pact to hide our secrets."
"Then who-"
Angie pointed to the datapad. "Read. I cannot explain the story I was told." She shook her head. "Go to the labs. I must stay and pray for forgiveness from Atua." Kaito opened his mouth to say something, but Angie held her hand up, smiling. "I know you have forgiven me, but I must pray now. Can you understand?"
Kaito nodded. "Yeah, do what you need to. You gonna be ok?"
"Yes, we will see each other again soon." Angie nodded. Again, Kaito could see that Angie's world had radically shifted, but like Himiko, he felt that she would be ok eventually.
"Keep an eye on them." Kaito said.
"Of course." Angie said. She shifted into a crosslegged position on the floor, closing her eyes. "I will pray for you as well Kaito, thank you."
"We should have asked what lab." Kaito said as he and Himiko hurried down the various hallways.
"Wait." Himiko said, stopping. "Do you hear that?"
Kaito listened, hearing a strange metallic groaning noise. "Yeah, I do."
"This way." Himiko said, moving down a side hall.
"Are you...tracking the sound?" Kaito asked.
"Yeah, I clean my ears very well." Himiko said. "Over here."
A second supply closet stood before them, the strange sounds coming from within. Kaito took a deep breath. "On three then. One, two...three!" he threw open the door and something metallic crashed to the ground.
Kiibo.
Kaito was overcome with more guilt. He had forgotten to count Kiibo in the people who were missing. Was this robophobia? The thought was pushed away by something more pressing.
"Woah! Ok, uh, Himiko, help me start untying him." Kaito said, staring at the state Kiibo was in. His limbs had been tied to his body tightly, forcing the robot into a position of near immobility. One was even tied around his head, pressed into his mouth to keep him from speaking.
"I'm good with knots." Himiko said, quickly untying various knots. Kaito gathered the excess rope, pulling it away from the robot's body.
"Oh thank god." Kiibo wailed. "I didn't think anyone was going to help me!"
"What the hell happened?!" Kaito asked.
"I was doing security passes through the halls." Kiibo started.
"Wait, why?" Himiko asked. "There's no one here but us."
"I wanted to feel helpful..." Kiibo said in a small voice. Kaito could understand that. He patted Kiibo's metal shoulder.
"What happened next?" Kaito asked.
"I saw Kiyo, and he was demonstrating signs of extreme stress." Kiibo said. "I've been adding to my emotion recognition database." He added proudly. "I wanted to be helpful, like another human could, so I asked if I could do anything to help. He told me to come in here with him." Kiibo said. "I assumed that I was going to provide intimate physical comfort, so I was worried, but then he slammed me against the wall. My sensors malfunctioned."
"Aren't robots invincible?" Himiko asked.
"No...that's sci-fi stuff." Kiibo said in a small voice once again. "Anyways, while I was disoriented, he tied me up. And then he left me." Kiibo looked increasingly sad. "I couldn't see because I was facing the wall, but I heard him and Angie talking, something about protecting themselves and their loved ones..."
"So it wasn't a solo effort." Kaito said. "Kiyo and Angie teamed up."
"The others must be with him." Himiko said. "We need to find him."
"I would like to recite to him the novel on ettequite between robots and humans." Kiibo said, crossing his arms. "I wrote it while I was in the closet. It starts like this: Do not tie up robots and leave them in closets!"
Kaito had turned his attention to the datapad again, scrolling to Kiyo's name and clicking it. It was longer than Angie's or Himiko's secrets, and Kaito found himself scrolling through it. Several phrases jumped out at him, and he nearly dropped the datapad. "What the fuck..."
"What is it?" Himiko asked, trying to see.
"We gotta find him." Kaito said. "Kiibo, come with us."
"So I can read him my book?"
"Sure." Kaito said, feeling his anxiety growing. Jesus, this had been a terrible idea. His crewmates' secrets ranged outside what he would have ever imagined. "We're gonna try his lab."
"Is something going on?" Kiibo asked. "Are we finally taking initiative against robophobia?"
Kaito didn't answer, weaving the corners, flying through the doors. Kirumi and Shuichi were sprawled out on the floor, unconscious. Tenko was tied in a similar state to Kiibo, facing the door. Her eyes widened when she saw Kaito, making frantic noises through her gag.
"It's ok, I'm gonna help y-" Something whacked Kaito across the back of the head. His vision illuminated with stars, before he toppled into darkness.