What the heart wants
Josie frowned at the screen, she really didn't enjoy horror movies. She got up from her bed and turned to the blonde lying next to her.
"I'll go to the kitchen; do you want something?"
"No, I'm fine" Lizzie gave her a tight smile that faded as soon as her sister turned around. She frowned as she watched her sister leave. Since the night Hope told her what happened, she spent a lot of time trying to imagine the life that the tribrid had lived. A life that not only Hope and Josie were happy, but that she had been too.
She shook her head, dismissing her sudden melancholy. It was ridiculous, she thought sceptically. Josie a mother? And not just any mother, but the mother of Hope's babies? It was crazy. Then there was the idea of Hope and Josie being together. She couldn't imagine it. Or maybe she didn't want to, a voice whispered in her mind.
Her eyes fell on the photo on the nightstand next to her. It was a photo of them on a trip to Paris. Her fingers reached out and she touched their smiling faces, wishing that she and Josie had the closeness they had shared in Hope's dream, not that now they weren't close enough, they were twins, for God’s sake, they shared everything. But she was very aware that for some time there were walls that separated them. Walls, she admitted to herself, had put it first without realizing it.
She glanced toward the open door. Then She watch Hope pass by.
"Hey, Hope" she got out of bed and walked to the door.
"Hey" greeted the tribrid. Her face was haggard and she looked tired.
"Haven't you had any luck sleeping yet?"
Hope shook her head. Every time she closed her eyes, she dreamed of Josie and the children and waking up without them became more and more difficult.
"I miss my children"
Lizzie closed her eyes at her simple, painful statement.
"I know" She mutters.
"Hope, are you sure it was real?" the words came out before she could register them but she didn't withdraw them. The truth is that she desperately wanted to convince her that it had not been so. Not only because of the tribrid, but also because of her, she didn't want to think that there was a life out there where she had been happier than she is now. "I mean; how do we know that his powers weren't really illusions of what you really want instead of showing you alternate lives?"
"Are you saying that what I wanted then was to fall in love with Josie?" she asked with a wry smile. Lizzie shrugged in silent defeat. “It was real, Lizzie. I know it in my heart "
Lizzie met her eyes at the quiet conviction she heard in her voice. Now Hope was different. She couldn't exactly place it, but she knew it was that other life that had caused it. The blonde nodded not knowing what else to say, so she changed the subject "so how is your life with Maya?"
Maya was the new wolf girl and now her roommate, the girl was nice but she had no filter when saying things, she had great problems obeying authority and she had no qualms about flirting with her or annoying her.
Hope shook her head.
“Frustrating, everything I say disputes it. But I think she has finally managed to give herself an opportunity to enjoy school "
"Well, Fido, this has to be difficult for her," Lizzie pointed out. "Everything she knew or thought she knew about herself is gone or changed and she has to adapt to a whole new world."
"Is that empathy? Who are you and what have you done with Lizzie Saltzman? " she tries to joke
The blonde rolled her eyes.
“I can be empathetic, fleas. to something the years in therapy have to serve, I know a thing or two about mental health "
Hope sighed.
“I try to be patient with Maya” then Hope looked at her with a hopeful expression on her face “I thought maybe you and Josie could come to my room tomorrow night and watch a movie so Maya would feel more comfortable with socializing with others"
"Hope, are you sure seeing my sister right now is a good idea?" she asked with a frown. And speaking of Josie, she thought with her gaze fixed on the hallway, she would be back soon and Lizzie didn't know if Hope's reunion with Josie at that moment would help things. So she closed the door to her room and lead Hope out of her room.
"I'll have to see her sooner or later, we live in the same school and we have classes together" she said and then she felt Lizzie's hand pushing her forward to start walking "Lizzie, are you trying to get rid of me?"
"No, why would I want to do that?" her laugh was sharp and forced.
Hope smiled, but vanished when she looked at Josie standing there with her arms full of junk food.
"Hey"
"Hi" the brunette answered breathlessly, then her eyes went from her to Lizzie "Did I interrupt a private conversation?"
"No, no," Hope stuttered, feeling her heart race. Despite her words moments before with Lizzie, she found she had no idea what to say. And looking at the brunette now, all she could remember was feeling her lips against hers when she had kissed her. The tribrid looked away.
"I have to go"
Josie stood there for a moment, biting her lip, undecided. Then, before she knew what she was doing, she handed the food to Lizzie and walked over to Hope.
"wait!"
She ran past her sister without looking at her. Hope looked up in surprise.
"I want to invite MG to join Lizzie and me," she explained, pointing the way in front of them that led to the boys' wing.
Hope nodded and her gaze returned to the ground.
Josie sighed, knowing that if she left it to Hope, it would be another 3 weeks before she got over the awkwardness between them. So the brunette steeled herself and stopped the auburn girl.
"Hope, you can't avoid me forever."
She turned to her with a serious expression.
"I know and I'm sorry, Josie"
"For kissing me or avoiding me?" the brunette couldn't help asking.
"For avoiding you" replied the tribrid without thinking. Josie's eyes shot up to her and Hope stuttered "and ... and for the kiss"
"So why did you kiss me?" Josie asked, taking a step closer to the wolf. She held her breath as she waited for the answer.
Hope shook her head helplessly as she stared at her, unable to tell the truth, but unwilling to lie. So She changes the subject.
"I'm sorry I haven't been around since then"
"I missed you," Josie admitted quietly, looking at her hands shyly.
Hope's eyes met the lovely pout and she felt warmth fill the void inside her.
"Do you want to come to my room tomorrow night to see a movie? You and Lizzie? I want to introduce you to my new roommate, Maya and maybe we can talk”
Josie bit her lip, feeling absurdly pleased with the invitation.
"of course, I would love to"
Hope smiled and they continued walking in silence.
"Hey, are you sure you're okay?" Maya asked looking at her roommate fixing the room at full speed.
"Yes I am"
Maya rolled her eyes.
"I don't see why so much trouble, we'll only see a movie, right?"
"what? Yeah, it's just a movie” Hope answered absently.
Maya crossed her arms and guessed cleverly.
"This sudden need to impress, it won't be because of a certain brunette twin, right?"
Hope looked at her as if she had been caught.
"The wolves speak and you aren’t as subtle as you think, tribrid" Maya said.
"I just want it to be perfect"
"I get it, but from what I've heard from your girl, she won't care if it's perfect, she'll only care that you did it, so relax a bit."
Hope smiled at her.
"Thank you, Maya"
The girl smiled warmly at her.
"anytime. Now, if our mission is to impress, I better do my part” she walked around the room helping Hope clean up until everything was settled. “Now I think I'll go for a walk before the girls arrive”
"Just make sure you come back in 15 minutes," Hope warned.
Maya left before the auburn girl could say anything else. Hope shook her head, arranging the space where they would sit and watch the movie, thinking of Josie. Since yesterday, the brunette is everything she could think of. Not that this was surprising, she admitted to herself with a smile, Josie was always in her thoughts.
"Everything looks great," said a voice behind her.
"Josie" she said as she turned around dropping some napkins in the process.
Both girls bent down to pick them up off the floor, Josie handed them over to Hope taking her hand in the process stroking the palm with her fingers. When the brunette realized what she was doing she was going to let go of the tribrid's hand, but Hope spoke.
"Don't stop," Hope whispered taking a step closer to Josie.
Josie's fingers took on a life of their own, gently tracing the tribrid's palm, her heart pounding faster as she felt Hope's soft hand under her fingertips. The tribrid approached and Josie let her eyes close, waiting to feel her kiss.
"It seems that there is something hot here and this time it isn’t me" said Maya entering the room.
Both girls jumped apart, red fogging their cheeks.
Hope shot her a look, telling her to behave.
"Josie this is my roommate, Maya Machado, Maya this is Josie Saltzman"
Josie pulled away from Hope and smiled at the other girl.
"I hope you are adjusting well to school"
"I was better before, but I can't complain now" Maya smiled looking at the girl Hope cared so much about. She couldn't deny that Hope had good taste, the girl in front of her was beautiful and she had a warm smile that made you feel welcome. "Hope has talked lot about you, it's good to finally have a face to put on with the stories, although it clearly didn't do you much justice, you're beautiful Josie"
Josie blushed at the comment and turned to Hope who was staring at the ground, clearly embarrassed by what Maya said.
The door opened again, showing Lizzie.
"Well, what are we going to see?" the blonde asked, she stopped a bit when she looked at everyone standing idly by. The girl who thought it was Maya was smiling, Josie was looking at Hope, who was looking at the ground as if she expected it to swallow her at that moment. "what did I miss?"
Maya looked at the girl who apparently had stolen the heart of her roommate, she wasn’t stranger to the tragic story of the auburn girl, who she already considered a friend, she hadn’t lied when she said that wolves speak. But now in front of her eyes she saw how Hope was laughing at Josie's joke, she had never seen her so lightly since she met her. With a smile of her own, she decided that from now on she likes Josie Saltzman.
Seeing how Hope was around her, she was proving that Josie was just what the tribrid needed.
Maya watched as both girls got up, explaining that they would go for more snacks. The brunette just nodded.
Lizzie came out of the bathroom and only found the new wolf girl.
"where…?"
"Outside, officially for snacks, unofficially I hope that making out, I can only bear so much sexual tension up to a point," Maya said without taking her eyes off the film.
" I hope so"
Lizzie just smiled and sat down next to the brunette.
Outside, Hope was walking nervously beside Josie. There was a time, not long ago, when touching her had been as natural as breathing and now she was as close, as she had dreamed of, but now she didn't know what to do.
They made their way into the kitchen in silence and Josie leaned against the island, sighing in satisfaction, even with the discomfort in the air.
Hope watched as Josie's hand came down and stroked her belly, her mind racing back to another time.
"Hope"
"what?"
"I think the babies just moved." She smiled widely when she felt the slight movement once more. She took the other girl's hand and placed it on her belly. "Do you feel that?"
Hope shook her head.
"No, nothing"
Josie saw her disappointment and tried to comfort her.
"Aunt Elena said it would take a while to feel the movements of the babies, maybe they are not big enough yet"
"Maybe" she agreed, until an idea came to her mind "get up".
Josie frowned, but did as the other girl asked. Hope pulled her to her, placing her ear against the brunette's belly. She closed her eyes and concentrated, shutting off everything else. First, she sensed the rapid heartbeat of the babies and then, there are, like a small earthquake, she heard the movements.
"There they are"
She couldn't help the proud smile that spread across her face when she looked at Josie, who was beaming. The tribrid rise and hugged Josie spinning her around.
"The babies moved"
Josie laughed.
"I know, Hope. I felt it"
"Hope?" Josie's voice brought her back to the present "where were you?"
“In a nice place. But here it's nice too” She saw the look of surprise on the brunette's face and smiled.
Josie smiled at her in return, trying not to take too much meaning in her words.
"Maya looks nice" changed to a more neutral theme.
"Yeah, she's quite nice when she wants to" Hope smiled "so what's happened to you lately?"
"Well, you're seeing a new representative of the witches on the honour council," Josie said sheepishly.
"Wow, that's amazing Jo" she was really proud of the brunette.
"Yeah, I hadn't applied, but Penelope, she moved all the witches just to screw Lizzie, who inexplicably took it too well," Josie said thoughtfully.
Hope guessed that Lizzie hadn't said anything to her sister because she was too busy processing what she had tell her.
An idea occurred to her and before she could flinch she spoke.
"I think we should celebrate"
Josie frowned.
"celebrate?"
"Yes, not every day you become a representative of a faction on the honour council, I'm proud of you, Josie"
"really?" She asks sounding vulnerable
"Really" Hope took a chance and leaned over to place a kiss on her cheek, enjoying the action for a moment.
They returned to the room with a smile and movie night passed quickly and Hope accompanied the brunette and her sister to their room.
"What time should I pick you up the saturday?" the auburn girl asked before Josie entered her room.
"for what?" Josie asked confused.
"To celebrate because you’re in the council of honour"
"Hope ..."
"Josie, I want to do this for you." She watched her bite her lip and knew she had it.
"okay" she relented, even as she told herself she was crazy for accepting this. "At two, it’s okay?"
"It's perfect" Hope smiled
Lizzie, who had entertained a bit on the way with a witch, approached the tribrid.
"Are you sure about this, wolfie?"
Hope didn't answer her right away. She hadn't thought of anything but Josie and the boys since she'd come back, and as much as it broke her heart, she knew she couldn't have the life she once had. Things had gone a different way and she couldn't change that.
She squares her shoulders and look at the blonde.
"I want my life back"
Lizzie looked at her in alarm.
"What do you mean you want to get your life back? You can't go back”
"No, I can't" she said firmly "I can't change the past, I can only move on"
Finally, she knew what her heart wanted. Maybe she had known it all along and was tired of fighting it. Now she would fight for it.
"The truth is that I want what I had before, I want a life where I wake up next to Josie every morning and where I have my family once again"
Lizzie stared at her wordlessly.
"Do you realize that maybe my sister doesn't feel the same?"
"Oh I wouldn't be so sure" said Maya's voice behind her "since Hope kissed her, she's been calling her every night and Josie doesn't look like the type of person who would let you do that if she didn't feel something in return"
"What are you doing here?" Hope asked to her roommate.
"Lucy texted me, Jed and Alyssa had an argument, that means we shouldn't be here when the curfew starts," Maya said before continuing on her way.
Alyssa was the one who checked the hallways after curfew, if she found you it was automatic detention, triple when she was angry, like right now.
"where are you going then?" Hope asked when she noticed she wasn't going to their room.
"With Lucy" she says as if it were obvious and kept walking.
Lizzie returned her attention to Hope.
"So you talk to my sister every night?"
"Not every night"
"Hope, if you tell her all about the alternate worlds ..."
“I love her Lizzie and I know her. She is different here, I get it. I’m different too. But I don't want to live without the love we had. So if I have to start all over again, that's fine, because it's worth it. Being with Josie is worth everything "
The tribrid gave her a big smile.
"So I have an ally?"
"Okay, but if you hurt her, you're dead, mutt" Lizzie threatened.
Hope smiled and said goodbye.
Lizzie just hoped she was doing the right thing.