Look After You
Josie opened her eyes, it was still dark and cool, and she didn't need to look at the clock to know that her body had awakened her again ready for the attack of morning sickness. She crawled out of bed, careful not to wake her sister.
She walks down the lonely hall to the bathroom. She turned on the faucet to mask the sound of her throwing up and leaned over to the side of the toilet. Once her stomach was empty, she brushed her teeth wearily and returned to her room, carefully crawling into bed. Knowing that it wouldn't be long before the dream claimed her.
The Valentine's party was in two days; Josie had decided not to go. She had fooled Lizzie with the excuse that it was too painful after Penelope, and if nothing else had happened that would have been true. She had been the first person to whom she had given her heart and she had walked away from her without any explanation.
Surprised, she realized it was the first time in weeks that she had thought about her breakup. The love for Penelope was not as strong as before. Her pregnancy had taken care of that, it had been everything she had focused on. Her feelings for Penelope had faded into the background and had slowly begun to fade. She had to put the past behind her and focus on the future.
A future that now included Hope.
Hope, the second reason she wasn't going to that party. She knew that Landon would be there with Rafael and the others and although she had never had a problem with Landon, she knew Hope longer. Even without the pregnancy, she was sure that she would side with Hope, she deserved to have someone to support her. And even if she decided to go to the party, she couldn't be there and watch her suffer.
Josie sighed in the dark, trying to imagine how Hope will feel with this date so close. They saw each other every night, Hope would always come to her room with mineral water and crackets for her sickness, they would talk until Lizzie arrived. What was even more surprising was how much she looked forward to those talks. They spoke with an openness they had never had before, as if they had lowered an invisible barrier between them. The first few minutes they always talked about how she felt and even though she felt that she was growing weaker every day, she always assures her that she was fine.
Then they would talk about nothing important, any chore they had commissioned at the time, any thoughts that crossed their mind, and little things. But still she enjoyed it more than she thought possible. Her reassuring tone and carefree demeanour made her think that everything would be fine.
But the only topic they had avoided was Landon and the upcoming Valentine's party. She didn't know if Hope would go and had no idea how to broach the subject.
Lizzie on the other hand. She had barely seen her all week. She had spent most of her free time coordinating the party, going over last minute details. The positive side of that is she didn't need to hide the effects of her pregnancy as much.
Josie bit her lip, her hand tentatively moving under the covers and pausing on the lower part of her stomach. She kept busy so she wouldn't have time to worry, but at times like these, when it was just her and her thoughts, she couldn't stop. She was terrified.
She was too young, unprepared. She was at school, how was she going to support a baby?
But more than that, more than the financial worries of caring for a baby or having such a great responsibility at such a young age. It was the moment when she held the baby for the first time that scared her. What if the baby looks at her and knows that she is not enough? Would it be a disappointment to her baby from the beginning?
A wave of exhaustion hit her and she felt her eyelids begin to close. Her worries began to fade as her body's needs took over and with a yawn, she closed her eyes, her hand still stretched across her stomach.
Later that day, after Lizzie left her so she could give orders to the witches for the party. Josie decided to continue her research on the merge, she was buried in books when her phone rang.
It was from the Mystic Falls Medical Centre. With fear she replied.
"Hello?"
"Josie? It's me Elena. I already have the results of your blood tests "
She squeezed the phone tight, was it her imagination or was there sadness in her aunt's voice?
"and?"
"I think it would be better to discuss the results in person"
"It's ... okay" Josie stuttered, fear freezing her "when do you want me to be there?"
"As soon as possible, right now I have free time"
"I'll be there" she hung up, hurried to her room, grabbed the keys of the Camaro from Lizzie's nightstand and drove to the medical centre. She went in and asked to speak to Dr. Salvatore, her voice sounded strange.
Martha, the nurse behind the desk, picked up the phone and then led her to an examination room.
" What am I doing here? I'm supposed to come for my blood test results. "
Martha shrugged.
"I'm sorry Miss Saltzman, I don't know anything about your case, the doctor asked to wait her here, she will be here shortly"
When the door closed behind her, Josie sat down on the stretcher, sighing as she rubbed her eyes. She forced her mind to remain blank and not jump to desperate conclusions.
"Hi, Josie." She looked up to see her Aunt Elena at the door.
"What happens?"
"There have been some developments that we have to talk about"
"Ok" she said distractedly, she was shaking.
Elena could see how distraught the teenager was in front of her. She felt bad for the girl, but she forced herself to straighten up and speak like a doctor.
"Your body is reacting to baby as if it were a disease, apparently the baby is taking too much of you that is forcing your body to create antibodies against it. In massive quantities I must say "
"What are you trying to tell me is that my body is killing my baby?" she whispered painfully, it was so much that she couldn't breathe.
"No Josie, it's just genetics, your body can't adapt fast enough to the baby's needs, whatever is causing this I've never seen before and it's a lot coming from me, I think the closest thing would be what happened in those Twilight movies "
The nurse came in calling Elena, apparently there was an emergency of some kind.
"I'll be back as soon as possible Josie" Elena said leaving the room.
Josie felt, her throat too tight to say words. When she was alone in the room, she hugged herself tightly and felt the phone in her jacket pocket. Desperately, she took the cell phone and dialled, hoping that soft voice would answer on the other line and make her believe that everything would be fine.
"Hello?"
She tried to speak, but couldn't force the words out of her mouth. Tears spilled from her face as her breathing became more ragged.
"Hello, Josie?" At the other end of the line, Hope was beginning to worry. When Josie's name appeared on her cell phone, she couldn't stop the little emotion that had run through her. But that emotion faded when she heard her sob on the line, she felt the panic rise inside her. "Josie, what's wrong?"
"Hope ... I need you to come to the hospital, something is wrong" she finally spoke.
"I will be there" said the tribrid in a strong and determined way, although her legs were shaking so much that she was not sure she could walk. “what room are you in?”
Josie looked around the room before her eyes met the door.
"213. Hurry up"
It took Hope less than 5 minutes to get there, she ran to the hospital in her wolf form carrying her clothes on her snout. She entered the hospital looking for the room, when she found it without wasting time she entered.
"Josie?"
The brunette raised her head and fear seized her heart when she saw that she was crying.
"How did you get here so fast?"
"I ran in wolf form here, what's wrong?"
Josie pursed her lips, trying to get the courage to tell her that her body was trying to kill their baby.
“I got a call from Aunt Elena. The results of my blood test were ready and she asked me to come. She told me that something was wrong "
The baby, Hope thought worriedly, stood in front of her.
"What happens?"
Josie wiped her tears away with her hand.
"They don't know, just that my body is not adapting to what it needs and my body is creating antibodies against it"
Pain like never before pierced Hope's heart. She closed her eyes and clenched her jaw trying to steady herself. Her fears had been correct, Josie's body could not maintain the pregnancy because the baby was just like her. No matter how powerful she was, she couldn't protect her child, she couldn't protect the baby from being like her, and she doesn't need Josie to say the words to know they were going to lose the baby. Nothing else could cause the pain that she saw on the brunette's face. The last of her control was gone and she pulled away so Josie wouldn't see her haunted expression and the tears in her eyes.
Josie closed her eyes as the tribrid turned. Tears running freely down her face. She knew Hope was blaming her for what was happening. She couldn't get mad at her for that, not when she felt the same way. She had been right, she couldn't handle this, couldn't even keep her child safe inside her.
"I'm so sorry," Josie whispered.
Hope turned around in surprise
"what?"
"This is all my fault, if I were stronger" she confess
The tribrid instinctively went to her and took her in her arms, feeling her shudder as she tried to control her emotions.
“Josie, this isn’t your fault, trust me. You have done nothing wrong "
The brunette clung to her arms, wanting to believe her.
Hope didn't want her to blame herself, when she knew it was all her fault. It was her genes that had doomed their baby.
"Josie, you've done everything you can to protect this baby, I'm the one with the problem, I'm the one who condemned our baby from the start"
"I'm sorry for the delay," Elena commented upon entering the room and stopped in surprise, looking at the young couple embracing. The auburn girl raised her head and met her gaze. Her eyes had the same tears and pain as Josie's. Despite the seriousness of the situation, Elena's concern lessened knowing that Josie would not face this alone. "Hi, I'm Elena Salvatore, Josie's doctor and aunt."
Hope nodded, releasing a hand.
"I'm Hope Mikaelson, I'm the ... Josie is my ... we are ..."
Elena took mercy on Hope and interrupted her.
"It's good to know that Josie is not alone"
"She’s not" Hope said seriously.
"I didn't have time to finish, but it's good that the two of you are together now, because we have some things to consider," Elena commented.
She didn't like the doctor's words, but she stood firm for Josie.
"This disease is very similar to Rh incompatibility, only more severe, your body is wearing down due to the amount of antibodies it is developing against the baby, plus having to cope with the needs of pregnancy, that's why you feel so bad "
"and the baby?" Josie asked.
"The baby is fine, from last week's exams until now, it doesn’t show any harm to the fetus, my fear is that the special condition of the fetus could make more of a dent in Josie's body"
The brunette's hand squeezed Hope's hand.
Elena looked at Hope
"I think it would be nice if you could give me some of your blood to do some tests and learn everything we can from you to help Josie" asked Elena.
"No problem" Hope agreed.
"Okay, I'll do a physical exam" Elena commented to Josie as she handed her a gown.
Josie reached for the thin cotton laid it on her lap, staring at her, feeling overwhelmed. When she looked up she saw Hope follow Elena out of the room.
"Hope?"
Hope looked at the terror in Josie's eyes and reassured her.
"I'm going to be outside while she does the exam, I'll be back ..."
"No, please stay" Josie asked.
The tribrid nodded, unable to deny her anything.
"Just let me know when you've changed and I'll be back"
"ok" her voice was small and seemed so fragile that the tribrid wanted to hug her again and promise that she would find a way to make all this better. But it was a promise that she didn't know if she could keep, so she just nodded again and closed the door behind her.
Once outside, she leaned against the wall and let out a heavy sigh, trying to stay strong for Josie when all she wanted to do was scream at the universe for being so unfair.
"Hope?"
Elena's voice brought her back to reality, the doctor approached her with a syringe and prepared to draw blood from the tribrid.
“No matter what we find out today, I need you to understand that Josie needs a lot of support now. Physically and emotionally, it does not matter if the results show that you aren’t the baby's other parent "
"I am" surprised her how quickly she had responded and how deep the possessiveness that struck her "the baby is mine, my wolf already claims it as ours"
"I'm ready," Josie commented in a voice low enough that Hope doubted Elena would hear her.
Elena took Hope's sample and tucked it into her robe as she entered the room followed by the tribrid.
Josie was lying on the table, her blue robe making her look even paler. Her hand covered hers immediately.
She stayed with her the rest of the day. Her embarrassment on the physical exam and her concern about everything came in second. The only thing that mattered was what Josie needed. She didn't even care that now Elena had her and their baby's blood in her possession. The blood that she had taken so much care not to fall into the hands of strangers. But now she would do anything to save the baby.
Hours later she stood outside the room waiting for Josie to get dressed. As soon as they finished here, she would take her to her aunt Freya. The witch had sent her a message telling her that she had reached Mystic Falls and was waiting for her at her family's old mansion.
When Elena returned with the results, she joined Josie in the room.
"Josie until we know exactly what is happening, you will come weekly ok?" the brunette nodded "there is also something else that worries me"
"What happens?" Josie asked
“The baby is not the only thing that worries me. You've lost 5 pounds in a week, Josie. Your blood pressure is even higher and this pregnancy is putting a lot of pressure on you. I’m concerned that more emotional or physical stress could cause a miscarriage, you probably don't want to hear this, but as your doctor I’m obliged to say so. The truth is, you may not be able to carry this pregnancy to term. Right now you’re in as much danger as the baby” Elena took a deep breath “I think we need to talk about your options”
“No” her voice cut the air “don't even say it. I'm having this baby”
"Jo" called Hope
"No, Hope, I’m going to have this baby, there is no discussion" with a confidence that she did not feel she turned to Elena "is there anything else I have to do?"
Elena saw her niece. She was showing the same fierceness as Caroline.
“First you must restrict your activities, I don't want you to lift anything heavier than a pencil, no jogging or playing any sport. Take it easy and rest often. The stronger you are; the more chances the baby has. To overcome this, you must avoid stress at all costs. Your pregnancy is very fragile at the moment and anything can happen "
Josie and Hope nodded, their faces are pale.
"anything else?"
Elena smiled bittersweetly.
"Wait for a miracle, I've seen some" She look at Hope "maybe you'll be lucky"
Josie nodded unable to speak because of the sudden lump in her throat.
"Come on" Hope said putting a hand on Josie's back "where's the car?"
Josie was gone, her only connection to reality was the warmth of Hope's hand against her jacket. She glances at the girl, who is waiting expectantly for her answer. She looks at the parking lot and walk slowly to the car, handing her the keys.
"Hope?" her voice was so low that she doubted if Hope didn't have her wolf hearing she would have heard it. "Mmm?" she said as she started the car and pulled out of the parking lot.
"Could I stay with you? I don't want Lizzie to see me like this"
The confidence she showed in front of Elena had faded, her nose was red, her eyes were puffy and she looked exhausted. If she came back like this, Josie knew Lizzie would ask questions. Questions that would cause the stress they wanted to avoid. Right now Hope would do anything she asked, anything that would make things easier for her.
"okay"
Josie sighed in relief that she hadn't argued and leaned her head back against the seat, sleep claiming her as soon as her head hit the seat. She woke up when she felt being lifted, tilted her head to look at Hope's face.
"Hey"
"Hi" Hope said back, as she closed the car door "let's go inside so you can rest well"
"Okay" Josie said feeling the movement.
Hope opened the door to her room, trying not to wake her. Fortunately, she hadn't passed anyone on her way to the room. She put Josie on her bed and remove her shoes. She covered her with a blanket and then pulled a chair closer to the bed. She sat up and watched her sleep, feeling lost.
She texted Freya saying she would see her later. She needed Freya to see Josie and give her a solution to what was happening.
She was worried about Josie, her mind was thinking different scenarios and none of them were good.
She could lose them both. That is what had been behind Elena's words, that the chances of survival were very slim. She looked back at Josie, her face calm as she slept. She longed to reach out and touch her, to reassure herself with that physical contact that she was there and going nowhere. But she didn't want to risk waking her up. She needed to rest, and from now on, Hope would make sure she got everything she needed.
Then, she sat quietly, watching over the person who was becoming the most important part of her life.
The moonlight crossing the dark room was the first thing she saw when Josie opened her eyes. The second was Hope.
"Hey"
"Hi"
"what time is it?" she winced at the faint sound of her voice.
"After 10" Hope stared at her, as she slowly turned to look into her eyes. “Josie, Elena said you are worse than last week. You should have realized what was happening, why didn't you tell me? "
"I didn't want you to worry about me, you already had too much on your plate with everything else" she admitted "besides if I said it out loud it was real you know?"
“I understand” Hope nodded “but it's my job to worry about you and baby now. Family above all, remember? "
Josie smiled.
“Family above all. Well if I go now I can get Lizzie to not ask questions, where are my shoes? "
She handed them over and stood up as she put it on. She seemed so weak and exhausted that Hope couldn't take it anymore and spoke.
"Josie I have to tell you something"
"Can it wait, Hope?" despite having slept, she still felt tired "all I want to do is go to bed"
And with that statement, Hope says nothing. It didn't matter what she wanted, it only mattered what was best for Josie. Maybe if she rested more she could take her to Freya and listen to what her aunt had to say.
"Yes, it can wait"
Josie walked to the door, opened it, then stopped, staring at her. The day had also taken on her its toll, the tribrid looked as tired as she.
"Hope?"
"yes?"
"Thank you for being there when I needed it"
The tribrid nodded.
“I will always be there for you, Josie. Always and Forever"