A sound of someone speaking coming from the living room woke Serena up at around two in the morning.
She reached for the other side of the bed before realizing that there’s no one lying next to her. She sighed and rubbed her eyes a few times before getting off of bed and putting on her nightgown.
The living room, even only one light was lit, was too bright for her liking. She squinted her eyes together while walking towards the source of her sleeplessness -- June Osborne, famous author, her soon-to-be-wife.
“...I told you i wanted the pink ones not the white ones. It’s a goddam wedding not a fucking funeral.”
June’s slightly irritated voice was Serena’s only guidance and when she was close enough, she put both of her hands on the woman’s shoulder which made her fiancee stopped short.
“Hold on Drew, i need a sec...Hey you...Did i wake you up? I’m sorry honey.”
June said to her apologetically and pulled her to the other side of the sofa by the wrist.
Serena followed June’s hands and eventually landed on the small space between the blonde and the sofa arm.
“It’s okay.” Serena snuggled closer to her fiancee and buried her face in June’s neck.
“Hello, Drew, you still there?” June kissed Serena on the forehead and picked up her phone that got tossed on the little table beside the sofa seconds ago.
“...yes, of course i’m wearing white...no, i haven’t picked it out yet, Serena and i are going to the store tomorrow.”
At the mention of her name, Serena looked up from June’s arms and saw the woman smiling at her.
So she smiled back.
“You’re welcome to dress as whomever you want as long as you’re wearing things. And NO. For the 458th time, i’m not gonna wear that hideous garland. I’m THE bride, not child bride.”
Serena chuckled at June’s comment. There’s a reason as to why it took them so long to find a suitable wedding planner -- June Osborne is one picky bride.
Of course Serena would never say that out loud. So she simply put Drew’s names in her prayers.
“...okay, i’ll let her know. Uh huh, thank you.”
June hung up the phone and turned to Serena who’s staring at her fascinatedly.
“Drew said hello. And he wants me to tell you that he votes for the DJ instead of the band.”
Serena didn’t miss the look on June’s face when she said “DJ”.
“Ah-ha. So i won.” Serena nudged June’s shoulder and teased.
“Don’t remind me. Ugh.” June took a deep breath before saying.
“Right, i almost forgot, i’m doing the seating chart. So, how many guests are you gonna invite? Beside your parents of course, they’ll sit with mine at their own table.”
June reached over to the table and grabbed what looked like a manuscript of a mathematician. Lines and numbers and everything.
“My...parents?” Serena asked dully.
“Yes. Your parents. As in the ones who born you?”
June laughed before answering.
Then the smile died out.
“Wait a second. You...haven’t told your parents we’re getting married?”
June put down the sheets in her hands and turned to Serena who’s still looking at her dully.
“I...well...”
Sometimes June regretted how well she knew Serena. And now was one of those times.
“Serena?”
June raised her voice which sounded harsh in the quite living room at 3 in the morning.
“I...forgot...?”
Serena really didn’t tell her parents that she’s getting married.
“Try. Again.”
June’s on the edge of loosing it.
“I...”
And Serena was never the eloquent one in their relationship.
“Do you even WANT to marry me or not?”
June’s fucking pissed.
What kind of people doesn’t tell their parents that they’re getting married before the freaking wedding?
“I...Of course i want to marry you! I spent half of my savings on that ring for God’s sake!”
Serena pointed to the engagement ring on June’s left hand which did cost half of her savings -- but she bought it in a heartbeat anyway.
“Then PLEASE help me understand how did you FORGET to tell you parents that we’re getting married?! Because i certainly can’t!”
How can June question the amount of love she had for her like this?
“Oh for the love of...It’s not like they’re gonna COME to the freaking wedding anyway!”
There it was.
“I...What?”
That’s WHY.
“They told me that when i first came out to them -- you’re our daughter and we love you, but it’s not likely for us to come to your wedding. Sorry.”
Serena sounded...broken.
“Actually they never thought that i will BE married one day. Because as soon as i am this daughter who didn’t turned out to be the one they expected -- straight and liking men -- they thought that i’m gonna die alone.”
June had never seen her like this before. Even on her worst days.
“Don’t say that, i’m sure it’s not...”
So she held Serena in her arms tightly and tried to comfort her fiancee.
“No! But it is!...it is.”
It didn’t work.
“Do you know what they suggested not long after i came out to them?”
Serena was more broken than before.
“To get a second kid.”
Devastated.
“For ME.”
There were tears in Serena’s eyes.
June didn’t know what to do so she kept quite and just listened.
“Imagine your 50-year-old parents tell you that they want to risk their lives and against all odds to conceive another baby just so you’ll have someone...SOMEONE...to look after you when you’re too old to even stand.”
“I was seventeen. Stupid teenager yes. But THAT...that fucking hurt.”
“It still...hurts.”
“And the worst part of all these? I fucking understand.”
“I fucking understand WHY they said that.”
“And sometimes?...A lot of times really...i wish i had killed myself when i had the chance so that they can have a second kid. A straight kid. So everyone can be happy.”
“But i can’t. Because i’m the only child and i’m the one who’s going to take care of them when they get older.”
“That’s my responsibility.”
“And i would get these...dark...twisted thoughts that maybe...just MAYBE i’m gonna die before them and having my life be taken by some accidents so i don’t have to deal with it.”
“I hate myself for thinking that but the truth is that’s the only consolation i’ve gotten that actually helped.”
“So no. I didn’t tell them. Not because i didn’t want to or, or I’m ashamed of it...because i don’t know, HOW...”
June’s heart broke into pieces at the sight.
“OH...oh baby...”
Now there were tears in both of their eyes.
“I wasn’t trying to hide it or keep it a secret or anything, i swear. I’m fucking proud of you and i can’t wait to marry you, I just....I’m sorry, It’s just...”
June’s not sure there’s anything she could say to make Serena feel better.
“No honey. I’m the one who should be sorry...I always forgot that not everybody is as lucky as i am to have a loving and supporting family.”
So she just stroke Serena’s hair until the woman in her arms calmed down.
Over and over again.