We'll be home for Christmas

“I know we said one day at a time Poppins, but if we don’t get a Christmas tree soon, all the good ones’ll be gone.” Jamie’s hand reached out to a sullen looking spruce that had already lost a large proportion of its needles. She picked at a branch and more needles fell away in her hand as she looked at it with contemplation. She glanced up at the au pair and immediately, she knew her mind was somewhere else.

“...Dani?”

Dani snapped back to the present moment, with a look of alarm in her eye that was so fleeting, if Jamie didn’t know her so well, she would have missed it. The gardener and the au pair had left Bly, and were living in Vermont after a few months travelling the midwest. It was December now, and they stood at a tree farm, preparing for their first Christmas together.

“I’m sorry.” She laughed nervously, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

Jamie eyed her cautiously, already knowing what she was thinking. Moments like this had happened a lot the last few months. But it was to be expected. Dani would disappear somewhere and when she came back, it took her a minute to find herself again. But she always did, eventually.

“What about this one?” Dani motioned to a much healthier, fuller-looking balsam fir tree that would dominate the living room of their small flat, above the flower shop they had opened together. Henry Wingrave had given them a generous amount of money as a parting gift when they left Bly some 4 months ago. When the couple arrived in the Green Mountain State at the beginning of October, chance would have it that a shop premises with a flat upstairs went up for sale. So, they bought it and turned it into a florist they called ‘The Leafling.’ Jamie had taught Dani all about the subtle art of flower arranging, and the pair were making a comfortable living with their new business venture in their new home.

Jamie bridged the distance between them, and squeezed Dani’s hand in hers.

“Looks good.” She smiled. “Do you wanna do the honours or shall I?”

“Oh no, I can’t-.”

“Rubbish it’s easy!” Jamie scoffed.

“Look, watch me. You want to cut it as low down to the ground as you can.”

Jamie had swung the axe with a surprising amount of strength for someone of her size and stature. She struck the base of the tree to create a notch so that the wood was easier to saw through.

Dani watched with a sheepish look on her face. As a gardener, this sort of thing was much more Jamie’s forte. Sensing her trepidation, Jamie picked up the saw, and lay down next to the tree, readying herself to begin sawing. “S’alright Poppins, you hold it, I’ll cut.”

A few moments later after Jamie had sawed through the tree wood, it fell to the ground with a soft thud. Jamie got up and brushed the tree needles off her body that clung to her khaki padded jacket. Together, they stood back to admire their handiwork, removing their protective gloves in perfect unison.

“We don’t half make a good team, don’t we?” Jamie remarked.

She reached over and took Dani’s hand once again giving it a tight squeeze, before bringing their entwined hands up to her lips and kissing Dani’s knuckles. Dani visibly softened at the gesture. “We sure do.” she smiled back at her tenderly.

Jamie was flushed pink with the effort she had applied to cutting down the tree, her hair peppered with fir tree needles. To Dani, she looked perfect. There was something about Jamie and the outdoors that just made her radiant.

“Right.” The gardener sighed contentedly. “Let’s get this thing home then.”

***

On some days, the au pair felt the Lady of the Lake weighing heavily on her, like a pressure in her chest that would rise and rise, until she could feel her heart pounding in her ears. She imagined this was what prey felt like. Prey that was acutely aware it was being hunted. It was something that always stayed in the back of her mind, but some days, she allowed herself to forget about the fate that awaited her. December 7th, was one of the good days.

“A little to the left maybe?” Dani pondered, motioning to the left with her finger, arms folded and her head tilted to the side as she studied the tree and the woman who stood before her.

Jamie, wearing a t-shirt emblazoned with 'The Clash' and a Santa hat, was perched high on a ladder affixing an angel to the top of the tree, which wouldn’t sit quite right under the weight of it. The tree did indeed dominate the flat, which was small but homely. In the short time they had lived there, they had made it their own.

“No, that’s not it, try a little more to the right.” The au pair said with a wry smile playing on her lips. The tree looked perfect to Dani, she just wanted to watch Jamie for a bit longer. Every time she leaned and stretched over the tree, her shirt rose up, exposing her taut stomach and defined abdominals. Dani watched her, knowing she could not keep this teasing going for much longer. The sight of Jamie's exposed skin made her want to reach out and touch her in a way that she had never experienced before. She cleared her throat to compose herself.

“Nope, that’s not working, try the left again.” Dani said, stifling her laugh. Her amusement and desire was impossible to hide now.

“Are you taking the piss?” Jamie huffed, placing her hand on her hip and rolling her eyes at the au pair. Though she tried to look miffed, the Santa hat simply would not allow it.

And with that, Dani cracked and couldn’t help but break out into fits of giggles.

“I swear to God-” Jamie laughed with mock annoyance as she descended the ladder and made her way over to Dani, encircling her arms around her waist, nuzzling into her neck and leaving kisses on her shoulder. Dani laughed with delight in response, wrapping her own arms around the gardener. Jamie loved to hear her Dani laugh. It had quickly become her favourite sound, and she knew that there wasn’t much she wouldn’t do to ensure she heard that sound as often as she could, for the remainder of their days together. However long that may be.

They stood for a few moments entangled in each other. As Jamie looked into Dani’s eyes. she knew she was still there. She was still her Dani. Their faces inched closer so that their noses were touching. They both sighed, relishing this moment of peace and contentment they always found in each other. They wished they could stay like this forever.

“Look what I got.” Breaking the moment, and to keep the atmosphere playful, Dani retracted one arm and reached behind her back, picking up a bunch of mistletoe sprigs from the side table. She raised it high over their heads.

Glancing up at it, Jamie replied “Oh yeah? What’re you gonna do with that then?” She smirked as her arms tightened around Dani’s waist, bringing their bodies closer together.

“I can think of something…” Dani replied, her voice low. Her free hand moved to cup Jamie’s cheek, her thumb gently grazing the smooth, unblemished skin of her face. Dani’s lips parted and her breathing became uneven as she stared into her lover's eyes, taking in every detail from her delicate eyelashes, down to her perfectly formed cupid’s bow. She dipped slightly to close the distance between them, caused only by their difference in height, and kissed her deeply, as though she was trying to communicate something only she could understand.

They could have stood like that for a lifetime. It felt like that every time their lips touched. Their hands once again became locked as the gardener and the au pair parted from their heavy kiss. Jamie opened her eyes first. They were dark and longing, and she could feel an insatiable desire settling in her stomach.

“I like your thinking.” She whispered, with their foreheads pressed together, pulling Dani eagerly by the hand in the direction of their bedroom.