Klaus is floating, riding the wave of his latest high.
(He’s trying not to drown.)
Dave hasn’t spoken to him in seventeen days.
(Klaus hasn’t been sober in seventeen days.)
Ben is saying something, has actually been talking for a while now, but Klaus can’t be bothered to listen.
Besides, if Klaus knows Ben (and he does- he’s spent the last twelve years being the only person Ben can talk to, and it turns out being dead turns you into a whiny little bitch), then it’s probably a lecture. Or a guilt trip, Ben is really good at those, too.
“Are you even listening, Klaus?” Ben finally snaps irritably, the sharpness of his tone breaking through the pleasant haze of drugs and booze that Klaus is lost in.
Klaus squints at his brother before offering up a sloppy salute. “Sure am, mein bruder ,” he says cheerily, flashing him a charming smile. “Couldn’t tune out your bitching and moaning even if I wanted to!”
Ben glares down at him.
“Which I don’t, obviously!” Klaus adds on hurriedly.
Ben’s glare turns judgmental.
Which rude , it’s not like he’s in any place to judge. He’s dead! He doesn’t have to worry about things like breathing or eating or, ew , withdrawals (again). Or, like, real life Adult Problems. He just gets to be . Klaus wishes he just got to be . That sounds way better than whatever shitty end of the stick he actually got.
“Your end of the stick wouldn’t be so shitty if you just went and talked to him,” Ben stresses and oops, Klaus must’ve said that out loud.
“You did,” Ben says with a deep, long suffering sigh, head tipping back so he can stare balefully up at the night sky, most likely praying for God to strike him down once and for all.
Heh. Jokes on him, God is a strong, independent little brat who probably gets her jollies off by fucking Klaus over.
Hence his current predicament (which may or may not be of his own doing, but that is not a fact he will ever be willing to admit).
“You can’t blame this on anyone but yourself, Klaus.”
Oops. He must still be doing it. He really, truly forgot how poor (i.e. nonexistent) his brain to mouth filter is when he’s high and/or drunk.
“Shhh.” Klaus brings a clumsy hand up to his mouth and covers his lips with a finger. “No talky- you’re bringing me down, Benny boy!”
“You’ve taken so much shit I don’t even think that’s possible,” Ben says dryly.
“Nonsense, dear bruder , I feel fabulous!”
Ben raises an incredulous eyebrow, before his eyes go soft and sad as he looks down at the interesting (pathetic) sight Klaus must make; sprawled out on his back on the fire escape balcony, one leg dangling off the edge, rain pitter-pattering across his face, a sopping cigarette perched between his lips, a half empty whiskey bottle dangling from his trembling fingertips, free arm thrown over his eyes like some sort of damsel in distress (which he is not- in distress, that is, clearly ) (he wouldn’t mind being Dave’s damsel right now, though).
And then Ben’s eyes ice over again, and any hint of sympathy (not that Klaus needs it) is gone. “Clearly.”
“I-”
“No,” Ben snaps suddenly, standing from his precarious perch on the railing. “No, I don’t want to hear your excuses anymore, Klaus. Seriously. You hurt him, and that hurt you, all because you’re afraid. He doesn’t need your shit, Klaus! No one does!”
Klaus could let that slide. He could, but he doesn’t, because now Ben is bringing Dave into his little tantrum, and while Klaus’s lines may be blurred (if they exist at all), that has certainly crossed one.
With a displeased hiss in Ben’s direction, Klaus levers himself into something akin to a sitting position, squinting at his brother through the rain.
“Listen up, Ben- I don’t need you, okay? I don’t need you to babysit me, and I don’t need you to yell at me, and I certainly don’t need you to tell me when I fuck up because I know ! I am deeply, eminently aware of just how fucked up I am, and despite what you seem to think, telling me doesn’t actually help!”
Ben actually pauses at this, head tilted consideringly, before he states with all the delicacy of a rampaging elephant,
“You’re crying.”
Klaus frowns, brings a shaky fingertip up to prod at his own cheek, frown deepening when he feels the telltale wet heat on his skin.
“I’m not,” he denies immediately, just because he can. “It’s the rain.” He flops back down again and glares balefully up at his terrible, mean brother.
“The rain,” Ben repeats flatly, shooting Klaus a deeply unimpressed look, the one he uses when he thinks Klaus is being particularly bone-headed.
“I-” Klaus is cut off by a soft fwmph and a flash of blue light. He tips his head back against the hard grate beneath him to peer at Five, who’s standing behind Klaus’s head holding the neon pink umbrella Klaus got him last week that he swore he hated, his face a mixture of concern and annoyance that he has to be concerned.
“You’re going to catch a cold,” Five states concisely, scowling down at Klaus as if he’s the reason for the bad weather (that would be Vanya, actually, but no one has had the heart to tell her that it hasn’t stopped raining for seventeen fucking days , and Klaus is pretty sure she hasn’t actually noticed despite her many trips out of the house) (a smaller, more logical part of Klaus’s drug addled mind reminds him that he actually is the reason for the bad weather- his sister wouldn’t be sad if it wasn’t for Klaus’s monumental fuck up).
“Yeah,” Klaus agrees absently, letting out a noncommittal hum.
Five’s scowl deepens in a way that means there is about to be violence , before he reaches down to snatch the whiskey bottle out of Klaus’s hand and throw it off the balcony.
Klaus watches it fall with a detached sort of irritation, rolling onto his side and leaning his head off the balcony to watch the glass shatter satisfyingly onto the concrete below.
“He’s right, you know,” Ben speaks up again, entirely unwelcome, and Klaus flaps a hand at him and hisses.
“Is that Ben?” Five perks up slightly, eyes blindly turning to peer in the direction of Klaus’s irritation. “Whatever he’s saying, he’s probably right.”
Ben snorts and turns to smile smugly down at Klaus, who groans before pushing himself shakily to his feet and climbing back through the attic window.
“Happy now?” He asks, throwing his hands up in exasperation.
Five blinks back inside, because clearly he’s too good to use mundane things like windows, while Ben just floats through the wall and eyes him.
“Your resemblance to a drowned cat is truly uncanny,” Five says, lip raised in disgust as Klaus drips all over the hardwood.
“He’s right about that, too,” Ben says with a smirk, and Klaus sighs, grinding his cigarette out against the wall before tossing it out the open window. Ben follows the movement with a look of disapproval, but Klaus really cannot give a flying fuck what he thinks, right now.
“Dave is talking about moving out, you know,” Five says conversationally, tucking the umbrella away and tossing it onto a nearby box that poofs dust everywhere.
There’s a jolt deep in Klaus’s chest, and the pain there gets so intense that he has to stop and just breathe for a minute.
Five’s eyes sharpen in concern but he doesn’t say anything, and neither does Ben, who just watches him like he’s a particularly pathetic puppy.
“Is he now.” Klaus tries for casual, but his voice breaks halfway through the sentence.
“Well, his boyfriend, whom he travelled fifty years into the future for, turned down his marriage proposal and then ran and locked him out of their bedroom for two days,” Five says, watching Klaus intently. Klaus’s chest throbs again. “And now, he won’t talk to him at all because he’s too busy getting high in the attic.”
Klaus winces and rubs a hand absently over his chest.
“How strange,” he says hoarsely, and Five flashes a sharp smile.
“Yes, how strange indeed,” Five murmurs in agreement.
Ben watches their stare off for approximately thirty seconds before saying abruptly, “Make me corporeal.” His voice leaves no room for argument (and fuck , that’s Serious Ben voice), so Klaus doesn’t even try, just sighs in resignation and lets the familiar cool blue of his power tumble through his hands, channeling the wave of energy into Ben who glows his way into full corporeality between one blink and the next.
Five inhales sharply (Klaus doesn’t know if his siblings will ever get used to seeing Ben), but Ben uses his newfound freedom to walk over and slap Klaus upside the head.
“Ow!” Klaus shrieks and trips over his own feet dodging the next slap, breath whooshing from his lungs as he falls hard onto his ass.
“I’m done!” Ben shouts, and Klaus feels a jolt of panic before he realizes Ben isn’t actually finished. “I’m done watching you throw away every good thing that falls into your lap! You’ve done it since we were kids, and I’m sick of it!”
And Klaus- he knows , okay? He does. Things start going good, and then he goes and ruins them. His siblings only let him get away with it because they’re too guilty about how they’ve treated him in the past to say anything about it, but Ben has no such reservations. He’s been trapped at Klaus’s side for twelve years, watching as he throws his life down the gutter as soon as it looks like things might be taking a turn for the better.
“He loves you , Klaus,” Ben continues, pacing angrily and only stopping to shoot Klaus a glare when he flinches at the word love . Five looks between the two with slightly widened eyes (Klaus forgets, sometimes, how much Ben changed after he died). “Despite all the weird shit in your life, or maybe because of it, he loves you. Are you really going to let him walk away? How much do you have to lose before you get your head out of your ass and do something about it?”
Silence rings, and Klaus stares at his brother, breath caught in his throat and tears pricking at his eyes.
Ben deflates slightly before he shakes his head and lets out a breath, eyes going distant and hazy with disappointment.
Without another word, Ben starts making his way towards the door leading down the stairs, and Five’s hands start glowing blue.
Klaus’s chest seizes in panic.
“Wait!” He scrambles to his feet. Ben pauses in the doorway, and the blue slowly fades form Five’s clenched fists.
“I’m scared,” Klaus admits quietly, staring down at his bare toes. “I run because- because I don’t want to get hurt anymore. And if I’m the one leaving then...then I’m not getting hurt, I’m doing the hurting. And I know that’s all sorts of fucked up.” He lets out a bitter laugh. “But I’m so tired of getting hurt, Ben. Dave...he has my whole heart. And I don’t think that I’ll survive if he breaks it.”
Klaus is still staring at his feet, so he almost gets bowled over by an armful of teenage boy.
“You’re an idiot, Klaus.” Five’s words are muffled by Klaus’s chest.
Klaus rests his chin in Five’s hair. “Yeah.”
“The biggest idiot I know,” Five continues, and Klaus huffs out a quiet laugh.
“I know.”
A cool hand falls to rest on his shoulder.
“Life isn’t fair,” Ben says quietly. Klaus turns his head to look at his brother, and Ben motions down at himself as if to say look at me, I would know . “I’m stuck. But you don’t have to be. And can I tell you something?”
Klaus frowns slightly but nods, because Ben has told him a lot of things and he’s never stopped to ask, first.
“You have Dave’s whole heart, Klaus. You have it, too. And you wouldn’t ever break it, would you?” Klaus shakes his head immediately and vehemently because no , he wouldn’t. He would rather chop his own up into little tiny pieces. Ben smiles gently and nods like he’s made his point which...Klaus supposes he has.
Five pulls away just enough to see Klaus’s face, meeting his eyes with a look so intense that Klaus nearly flinches under the weight of it.
“For once in your life, kiddo, don’t be afraid.”
Klaus shivers and says quietly, “I don’t know if I can.”
Ben laughs, soft and gentle and wondrous, and says, “Klaus, you already did. ”
“But I-”
“You let yourself fall in love with a man in 1968 in the middle of the Vietnam War . You had to know there was a chance you were going to lose him.”
Klaus swallows thickly and scrubs the damp sleeve of Dave’s sweater over his eyes. “I did,” he says, heart beating faster at the admission. “But I didn’t care. Loving him was worth losing him.” And then he freezes, breath catching in his chest. “Holy fuck, Ben, I did. ”
Ben nods and smiles encouragingly.
Five lets go of his shoulders and says, “Go get him,” and then smiles, bright and genuine and proud , and it makes Klaus’s chest swell with warmth.
He smiles at his brothers and whispers a heartfelt “ thank you ,” before he’s taking off down the stairs, nearly tumbling ass over tea kettle as his wet feet slip and slide on the hardwood.
“ I love you !” Klaus shouts breathlessly as he bursts into their bedroom. Dave startles, a folded shirt falling out of his hands and into the duffle on the bed, before he turns to stare at Klaus, wide eyed.
“I...what?” Dave asks, voice quiet and vulnerable and so lost that it makes Klaus’s chest ache.
“I love you,” Klaus rushes. “I love you so goddamn much that I was scared to say yes. I’m always so scared , Dave, but not when I’m with you. And that scares me even more. I’ve never met someone who makes me feel fearless, not until I met you.” He swallows and fiddles with his hands, heart beating painfully against his ribcage. “I said no before, and I’m so sorry, but I didn’t say no because I don’t love you, or don’t want to spend forever with you. I said no because of that, because I can’t even begin to fathom the thought that despite that, I might lose you some day. It was stupid , I know that now. So- ask me again. Please. Please, if you still love me enough to want it, ask me again.”
Please ask me again.
Dave is still staring at him, shocked and silent, and doesn’t say anything for so long that Klaus starts fidgeting nervously.
“I...Klaus, do you mean it? Do you really want this? Because if this is some sort of joke, some last ditch effort to keep me, then we can’t-”
“No!” Klaus yelps, reaching over to fumble with the drawer on his nightstand and pull out a small envelope. He rips the top off and dumps the contents into his hand. “I got this in Vietnam, Dave,” he says quietly, holding up a simple silver band. “I got this in Vietnam, and then I never got the chance to give it to you.”
Dave reaches out a slightly trembling hand, picking the ring up before he laughs shakily.
“Marry me, Klaus. Spend the rest’a your life with me, and I’ll give mine to you.”
Klaus throws himself into Dave’s arms with a delighted laugh, holding his boyfriend ( fiancé, holy shit) close and peppering his face with kisses.
“Yes!” Klaus says reverently. “I love you, I love you, I love you, I’m sorry, I love you,” Klaus whispers against Dave’s lips, and Dave kisses him languidly.
“I love you too, darlin’, more than anything in the world.”
It doesn’t fix everything. Obviously. How could it? Klaus has too much baggage, has fucked up so astronomically that nothing can be fixed so easily.
But it’s a start. A step in the right direction on the very long path towards healing.
And as long as he’s got Dave by his side…he thinks he can do it.
***
Klaus gets sober (again) and the wedding is beautiful .
There’s a truly exuberant amount of flowers, and Diego gives the worst toast Klaus has ever heard in his life.
Luther gives himself a concussion when he accidentally brains himself on the disco ball dancing to Soul Kitchen.
Vanya’s new girlfriend (Betty? Bethany? Brittany? Who cares! She’s exploring!) accidentally spills sparkling cider on Allison’s dress, and despite Allison waving it off with all the grace of a woman used to absolute, utter chaos , Vanya still blushes and pratters on about paying for the damage.
Five spends the evening chatting with Claire (“she’s the only one here with more than two braincells to rub together”), while Ben dances with literally anyone and everyone who’s willing (no one has the heart to turn him down, not when he looks so excited).
Klaus trips over his own two feet and nearly faceplants while walking down the aisle, and it turns out Dave’s shoes are not meant for breaking glass- when he steps on it during the ceremony, a piece somehow manages to poke through the bag, his shoe, and stab his foot. Luckily, it ends up being a shallow cut- nothing that a good bandaid can’t fix.
In all actuality, the wedding is a disaster.
It’s the best night of Klaus’s life.