A century later when they finally meet again, Claudine had been standing outside of a bookstore and drinking the most mediocre coffee in her life.
Humanity is such a far cry already from the one she’d known in just a span of a couple decades. Their clothes, their hair, their beliefs – everything about society mortals loved to define so much since the beginning of their feeble existence. Even the streets Claudine has walked a thousand times and more are familiar yet different in a way that only comes with time.
So, of course, she doesn’t recognize at first the one person in her immortal life she can’t seem to leave behind.
Last time they’ve met, she’d had shoulder-length brown hair and not purple tied to a side ponytail. She’d been taller then, just like how she’d been certainly taller than Claudine in many of her past lives. When that’s not the case, Claudine relishes in being able to be the one to tuck the other’s head underneath her chin. The green eyes are the same but Claudine doesn’t remember them ever being so bright before.
Not for the first time, Claudine wonders why they keep coming back to each other like this in every reincarnation. There’s nothing that binds them together; no red string on her finger and no tugs in her chest but Claudine always finds her each and every time. 7 billion people in the world and yet, her other half enters Claudine’s world with so much ease it’s as if she’d never left.
Claudine recalls five centuries ago when her name was Akari before it was Isabella, and Ingrid, and Hina. They’d met in Claudine’s hometown in that lifetime with Akari bumping into her at a museum as a foreign exchange student studying the arts. Black hair spilled over rare brown eyes with freckles dotting her cheeks. They’d spent most of Akari’s lifetime in France until her youth finally faded with age and her hair turned white. Claudine was still the same from the day they’d first met in that life. And so was Akari’s smile.
“Don’t cry,” she said, voice raspy and weak at 86 but still just as loving – still sounded like home. Akari brushed away the tears Claudine spilled, sick and tired of saying goodbye. “I know you’ll find me again in my next life.”
The door chimes jingle as she enters the store – the heater an invited warmth against the December chill on her face. Claudine closes her eyes and takes a deep breath; lets the ink and crisp book pages greet her. Familiar. It’s a scent that’s been by her side for so long. Honestly, it’s about time she finally finds her working in her natural habitat.
“Welcome to Pages! How may I help you?”
Truly, there are no indicators Claudine is able to follow to lead her to her other half in every lifetime. She never completely has the same features, never the exact same person twice. Other times she even goes by “they”, other times she disregards it completely. Claudine recalls with fondness the reincarnations when she was a him: chest bounded, hair cut short until barely reaching his nape and looking so happy and proud with who he is that Claudine only loved him more for it in those lifetimes. And although essentially, she’s the same person, every version of her is similar and yet, entirely different.
There’s not a single thing that tells Claudine she found her again. No sign pops up to congratulate her nor is there anyone around to give her a pat on the back.
But when she opens her eyes and looks into expectant emeralds – Claudine just knows their paths are intertwined once more.
It doesn’t make sense. Her other half had spent countless lifetimes trying to give her the answer only to come up with nothing. Just like how Claudine doesn’t know why she’d lived for as long as she did and will only continue to do so. Though she supposes that perhaps it’s just fate who refuses to separate them, no matter how cliché that is. And she knows just how much the other hates clichés.
“I was just ah, browsing.”
Her other half nods, glasses bouncing lightly on her nose. That’s new, Claudine muses. Though she has to admit it only makes her even more adorable.
“I see, well, if you find something you know where to find me.”
“Actually,” Claudine clears her throat, “I was hoping you could recommend some to me, Ms. …?”
“Junna,” she says and Claudine’s heart warms at the sight of her smile, “and of course! Although I err more towards classical literature if that’s not to your tastes.”
Junna. She commits the name to memory as much as she could. She tries to remember all of her features in that moment and though Claudine will have the chance to memorize everything about this lifetime’s version intimately more so later on, she still tries. Time is fickle and in the face of her unexplained immortality, Junna’s lifetime can pass by her in just a blink of an eye.
And it’s getting harder to remember the longer Claudine exists. Memories of her long, long past is nothing more than just a foggy haze now. She can’t even recall how they first met in Junna’s first life. Details overlap and reincarnations merge together until all Claudine remembers are the smiles, laughs and warmth of the love the woman doesn’t even know she’d given her.
But she tries. Junna, she repeats in her head. Claudine will remember Junna’s birthday, things Junna likes her past lives didn’t, Junna’s past and everything else. She doesn’t want to forget anything o the time she’ll have with Junna before it’s another life and another name.
“No,” Claudine finally replies, smiling all the while. “That sounds lovely. How about some Shakespeare?”
Predictably, Junna’s eyes light up as a more excited air surrounds her. “He’s one of my favorites! My most read work of his would probably be–“
“Sonnet 48,” Claudine mumbles without a thought and out of fondness as Junna’s eyes widen.
“How did you…?”
She shrugs, amused at her surprised expression. “Wild guess, I suppose.” You’ve always loved it because of all the gay annotations.
“Well, it’s either you’re psychic or just lucky because you got that right.”
Claudine winks, “Which one do you think it is?”
Junna laughs and her heart aches as she finally hears it again after an entire century of walking the Earth without that melodious sound by her side. Even the most skilled of orchestras can never hold a candle to that beautiful symphony.
“Cheeky,” Junna says after her giggles subside. “Oh, that reminds me, I haven’t caught your name yet…?”
She doesn’t know how many times they’ve done this already. “First meetings”, hellos and asking for each other’s name as hers change and Claudine always stay the same. She’d long lost count after the 10th reincarnation.
But it doesn’t deter her from making a good impression. Junna may have loved her already a hundred times before, but Claudine only has one chance to love her in every lifetime.
“Claudine. Saijou Claudine.”
“Then, Saijou-san, would you happen to have some paper with you? I’d like to write my suggestions down on a list.”
In that second, Claudine lets the warm air fill her lungs as she breathes. In that second, she watches the other rummage through the desk trying to look for a pen. In that second, she truly looks at this version of the person she’s convinced she shares her soul with.
Junna with purple hair, emerald green eyes, and glasses barely hiding the freckles on her nose. The bookstore clerk she met on the 3rd of December. In her smile, she sees all the past reincarnations she’d ever loved.
She looks at the cup in her hand that had long gone cold.
“Actually, would you like to talk about it over some coffee?”
And in that moment, Claudine knew:
She will learn to love her all over again in this lifetime until their time together moves on to the next.