Chapter IV
“Tell me where you got that ring!” Anne demanded her again, her heart racing in her chest, blood rushing loudly in her ears, she would recognise that ring anywhere – it couldn’t be another. Ann twisted uncomfortably, which Anne took notice of and her heart began hammering harder in her chest – what if it wasn’t that ring but another. Had Ann married that rapist and then seriously sat herself in her sickroom to taunt her?
“Well?” Anne stared at the ring, her head giving her hell at the moment on top of it all.
“I’m not sure I should tell you.” Ann murmured eventually; she looked a bit alarmed at Anne waiting for her retort. Ann wasn’t really cut out for any yelling today. She hadn’t slept for three days, her back was sore, and she was certain that if Anne did start shouting and saying things now, she would break down and cry inconsolably.
“It’s a wedding band.” Anne’s voice was low and a bare whisper, as if she didn’t want to believe it, had she married him then? Hope dwelled in her chest though, surely it was her ring!? – That must be the ring she had ordered, he couldn’t have picked a ring so similar to hers, surely? Unless, Ann had picked it herself of course. Anne’s eyes regarded her closely, and Ann tried to hide away her hand, hesitant of what to do. She didn’t want to slow Anne’s recovery. How did one treat memory loss anyway?
“No.” Ann replied meekly, and Anne frowned at her though it made her head throb,
“It is! Who have you married?” Anne sounded accusing and to be fair, she was, Ann had and was breaking her heart. How could she choose to be with that fucking rapist rather than her? When she could make her so happy.
“I… I can’t say.” Ann stuttered, her eyes avoiding Anne’s dark ones.
“Why? – If you do not tell me you might as well leave.” Anne growled and Ann grimaced,
“I’m afraid you will overexert your head, and Dr Kenny said…”
“Dr Kenny is an idiot!” Anne exclaimed and Ann frowned,
“Yes, but… I don’t want to hinder your recovery.”
“You’re not. Seriously tell me or leave me. Either way it’s going to plague me more if you do not tell me.” Anne snarled at her and the blonde looked extremely conflicted about what to do.
“Are you seriously taking advice from Dr Kenny!?” Anne pressed further and Ann’s eyes darted to her and they were brimming with tears, she was much too tired to be pushed like this.
“Anne…” She begged her, but Anne wouldn’t heed her,
“Is it him? That scum Ainsworth!?”
Ann’s face turned to that of mild disgust for a second, and Anne wondered at why that was. Her hopeful heart told her it might be because she hadn’t and that she was hers, and her pessimistic brain told her it was because she had just called her husband a scum.
“Anne, no!”
“It isn’t him, or you don’t want me calling him names?” Anne continued and Ann looked miserable, how was she supposed to get Anne to rest her head when she wouldn’t let things be?
“Anne, they told me to let you rest.”
“Do you seriously imagine I will be able to rest until I know? When we…” Anne trailed off, it was too painful. Ann eyed her with sympathetic eyes, taking her hand in hers, and this time Anne didn’t pull away – she couldn’t be bothered, she was too tired, too hurt to fight back.
“I can tell you in a few days when your head is better. Its’ been a long few days, and…”
“In a few days!? Why would you torment me like that? Undoubtedly you must comprehend what agony that would mean for me!” Anne cried upset, and Ann bit her lip anxiously, pulling her hair behind her ear,
“Calm down Anne, your head…”
“Leave.”
“Sorry?” Ann seemed perplexed,
“I don’t want you here, I don’t want your pity or your… it’s too painful! Not that you would understand- to you I’m just repugnant and queer!” Anne barked, and Ann flinched but little, a traitorous tear running down her cheek,
“I am your wife!” Ann squeaked out, tears rapidly following the first one, Anne became speechless for a second, she just stared at Ann in disbelief. Despite her hopes, she hadn’t expected it to be true, she had not allowed herself to go there in her mind.
It wasn’t often she was speechless, but she teared up,
“But you said… when did we? How did we?”
Ann couldn’t help but grin wide at her, she stood up and sat down gently on the side of the bed instead, running the back of her hand against Anne’s wet cheek,
“I realised that there was no other I’d rather spend my life with and, and that I’d rather die than to be without you!”
“Really?” Anne whispered her voice frail, and Ann kissed her forehead sweetly,
“Truly. We took the sacrament in church last Easter. The 30th of March 1834.” Ann told her smiling and Anne’s face almost lit up in a smile,
“Is that all true? This isn’t some sick joke that someone put you up to?”
“Of course, it’s all true! I would never hurt you – not deliberately anyway, not again.” Ann told her sincerely and Anne reached up to cup her cheek, running her fingers along it and down her neck, making her skin tingle and she closed her eyes leaning into Anne’s hand. It had truly been the worst three days of her life not knowing if Anne would wake up again. She had sat by her side through most of it, though they had forced her to rest in her own bed on the third day, telling her she would be no good to Anne if she perished. Ann hadn’t got much rest though and then she had heard Catherine come bustling down the corridor.
“I’m sorry for all the things I said before. I…” Anne began but Ann shushed her softly,
“Don’t apologise. How were you supposed to know? And if your memory alludes from when I said those unforgivable things, then you had every right to be upset with me!”
Anne were about to ask her for a kiss, when she felt another blinding pain from her wounded head, and she moaned loudly. Ann were immediately alarmed, checking her temperature with her wrist against her forehead, and eying the bandage intently.
“Do you want me to ask them to fetch the Doctor, I’ll tell them to get Dr Day if you like, Marian were the one who asked for Dr Kenny.” Ann asked and Anne shook her head very slowly not to upset her wound, her eyes closed to better stand the pain.
“No. It’s late. I only over-exerted my head. Rest will do fine.” Anne murmured, and Ann stroke her over the shoulder down the arm affectionately,
“You should sleep, I’ll be right here if you need anything.” Ann smiled small, and Anne’s lips twitched slightly upwards and she gave a small nod. Ann bowed down and kissed her over the brow tenderly before carefully standing up from the bed to seat herself in the chair next to it.
Anne held her hand out for hers, and Ann took it, their fingers intwining, and Ann watched as Anne’s breathing became calmer and deeper as she drifted off to sleep, and she felt her own eyes grow heavy with sleep where she sat. How would they explain her memory loss to the others?