Chapter 2
Holly wasn’t known for taking chances. It could be the opportunity if a lifetime, but even then she could find something to get in the way. It was a fatal flaw, one would say, but she was learning to stray. Or at least trying to.
So she hadn’t called Jan.
She thought about it a lot. She didn’t really need candles - and sometimes they gave her headaches - but it was a safe in, that she knew. To what? That part she was still a little bit confused about.
It had been a few weeks. Michael had been parading around the office in preparation for the birth of Jan's baby - it only fueled Holly’s guilt that she had failed to call the woman, as Jan had clearly wanted her to; right? Holly swallowed as she sat at her desk, tapping a pencil against her desk absently. Jan was going to be here soon - what was Holly supposed to say to her? Would she be offended? Was she just overthinking it? Probably.
The woman was having a baby soon, after all. She had bigger things to worry about.
It was only a few moments later that Jan was walking through the door, and she had at her side...a baby.
Oh.
Everybody seemed to be surprised, but nobody more so than Michael. If Holly was being honest, it felt somewhat good given the fact that Michael had told her he’d been be treating her poorly in Jan’s presence. It was shallow.
Instantly Jan’s eye caught Holly’s, and the blonde swallowed as she gave a weak wave, begging her cheeks not to flush in the woman’s presence.
The baby shower went exactly as the office had suspected a situation like that would go. Between Michaels inane attempts at a baby shower, and Jan’s…”lullabies,” it was a miracle that the employees tolerated it for as long as they did. Holly, on the other hand, didn’t mind so much.
When Jan put herself down for a nap, Astrid made her rounds among the employees of Dunder Mifflin. From Phyllis, to Angels, to Oscar, and eventually, to Holly. Baby in her arms, Holly lulled her to sleep around the office, humming softly as she cradled the baby lovingly. She was a sweet baby, Holly found, and seemed to be comfortable in her embrace. When she stumbled upon Jan sleeping on the couch, she could only imagine how tired she’d been. Holly couldn’t imagine having a baby just yet.
Suddenly the woman stirred awake, and Holly felt Astrid stir just slightly in her mother’s presence, but remain fast asleep. “How long was I asleep?” Jan mumbled, the sight of Holly holding her daughter awakening something within her.
“Not too long. She’s an angel.” Holly offered softly, a finger running over Astrid’s small cheek with affection.
“You didn’t call,” Jan pointed out after a moment, noticing how comfortable her daughter made herself in Holly’s arms. “I could really use the business.” Jan teased sleepily, reaching her arms out for her daughter. Holly passed her along, instantly missing the warmth of the bundle in her arms.
She blushed at Jan’s words, looking down at her feet. “I figured you were preparing to have your hands full.” She admitted shyly, motioning to the baby. “I’m sure you’re exhausted,” Holly added in understanding. “If you ever need a sitter, I-I love babies.” She offered, nodding.
“I’ll keep it in mind.” Jan nodded, eyes dancing over Holly’s face with interest. There was an awkward silence as Holly chewed on the inside of her cheek, wanting to work up the courage to say something - anything - before Michael stepped out of his office and interrupted them.
Holly swallowed her disappointment.
———————-
That night Holly stared at the screen of her cell phone with great intensity. She had to admit; living alone was pretty...lonely. She’d always had roommates, or her parents - even back in Nashua. But right now she couldn’t get the prospect of Jan from her mind, and her fingers danced across the keyboard of her phone aimlessly.
She could hear Oscar’s voice in her head egging her on, but he did seem like one for drama - and Holly had hoped to avoid that as much as possible. Aside from Michael, however, Oscar was the only other one to really understand Holly.
Taking a deep breath, Holly picked up the phone and glanced over at the sheet of paper Jan had given her sitting on the counter, dialling the number as she chewed on the inside of her cheek and brought the phone up to her ear.
It felt like a whole ten minutes before Jan picked up, and in that ten minutes, Holly had went through six different stages of hesitation. “Hello?” Jan’s voice ran through the receiver and Holly paused a moment, blanking on what to say.
“Hey-Hello.” She replied finally, clearing her throat. “It’s me. Holly, I mean.” She offered gently, bringing her hand to her forehead in faux punishment. But she could almost feel the smirk through the phone on the other line, and she settled herself down on her couch with a small grin.
“Holly, hi. I wasn’t sure I’d be hearing from you.’ Jan spoke with a teasing tone, and Holly could tell from the way she spoke that she had Astrid in her arms - she could hear the small baby coos.
“I’m not interrupting anything, am I?” Holly asked, hoping Astrid hadn’t been asleep when she called and she caused a disturbance.
“No, no. We just got finished with a bath.” Jan assured her with a shake of her head on the other line. “How are you?” She asked a moment later, setting Astrid down on the changing table and beginning to fasten her pajamas around her.
“I’m good,” Holly replied with a nod, hoping that Jan couldn’t hear the shakiness of her voice. “Is uh...Is the candle shop open?” She asked with a nervous chuckle, knowing she didn’t actually want to buy candles, but figuring it wouldn’t hurt to have an excuse for calling at eight o’clock at night.
“No,” Jan replied with a laugh, shaking her head buttoning up Astrid’s onesie. “But I appreciate your enthusiasm. What are you up to?” The older woman asked, beginning to prepare Astrid’s crib for bed.
Holly was relived that her blush couldn’t be seen, and she brought her thumb up to her mouth and chewed at the tip of the nail. She glanced at the glass of wine in front of her and the leftover pizza she was eating. “I was just having a drink,” she explained, taking a sip from the mentioned glass.
“Come have it over here.” It was more so an order - at least that’s what it sounded like to Holly - and the blonde got a shiver up her spine. “I have an...ample amount of wine.”
Jan had stopped drinking for the last nine months during her pregnancy, and her supply of wine was building up dust. Holly sucked on her tongue in consideration.
“Yes?” Jan asked over the line after a moment of silence, “I’ll text you the address.”
And before Holly could say anything, Jan had hung up. The younger woman sat on the couch in wonder, noticing the way she was so easily controlled.
And yet, she stood up and poured her glass out. Grabbing her keys and cell phone, Holly threw on her shoes and was out the door, waiting for Jans text as she got into her car.