Part One
Loud singing filled the dormitory the next day, or at least an attempt for it. Had Lily not been a bit too tired when they woke her up, she would have laughed at the terrible sound that varied from Dorcas's loud voice to Marlene's exaggerating singing as Alice and Cassie jumped up and down on her bed singing along.
It had been Alice's idea, or well, rather it was a tradition that had occurred ever since first year. A tradition that had started as Alice's idea. The birthday girl would sleep in while the remaining four would wake the girl up by singing the birthday song before showering her with presents.
"Come on, come on." Marlene urged excitingly, "You have to open the presents."
"You're not even going to give me a chance to wake up properly before you ambush me?" The birthday girl arched a brow, her eyes still tired but unable to mask the silent amusement.
The blonde shook her head in protest as she leaned down and pulled up a present at the size of a shoebox, wrapped in red paper with a golden bow. Very original, Cassie wasn't able to help herself as she chuckled.
"I'm just trying to spread some house love," Marlene said, hearing her friends chuckles.
"Certainly nothing wrong with that." She grinned, sharing a look with Alice, who had to bite back a smile.
As if her patience had run out, which didn't usually take long since Marlene was a rather impatient person. She placed the box on Lily's lap, who had managed to, despite the intense longing to go back to sleep, raise herself in a sitting position leaning her back against the headboard.
Lily only grinned as her eyes shifted from the present to her friend. "You know... maybe I should start with Alice's present." she joked, earning a pair of wide eyes.
"No, no, no. I was here first. Besides, she hasn't even found her present yet." She eyed the brunette sitting on Cassie's bed. "Come on, Lily, I've worked so hard on this," Marlene whined, causing the four girls to erupt in laughter.
"Alright, alright. I was joking with you." Lily laughed as she pulled the golden bow off. The other girls watched in curiosity as the red paper came off, not knowing what their friend had gotten her.
Marlene had been unusually quiet about this year's birthday present, so much that whenever the other three had talked about it, she had shut up and not said an entire word. Normally Cassie wouldn't have thought much about it, but when she asked Dorcas, who said that her girlfriend had been just as tight-lipped with her, she couldn't help the curiosity.
Lily shot her friend a playful look before throwing the paper to the floor and opening the lid of her box. Her brows furred for a moment as she saw a book lying in it. It was wide but not particularly long. She sent Marlene a questioning glance as she lifted the book from the box.
The cover was made of a dark reddish-brown leather, and it was quite thick, not as thick as some of the books she had read, but thick enough for her to think twice about it. On the middle of the front cover was a beautiful golden design.
"It's beautiful," She said, admiring the work of art in front of her.
"That's not the best part," Marlene replied smugly. "Open it."
As she opened the book, she saw an old picture which caused a soft laugh to appear. "Oh, Merlin.." her fingers caressed the photo of five girls huddled together in their dormitory, no more than eleven years old.
It had been one of their first days together. They had all been a bit nervous around each other, not saying much at the start, apart from certain small talk. It wasn't until Lily had pulled out a muggle camera she had gotten from her parents for her eleventh birthday that Cassie had managed to start a proper conversation when she had wondered just what sort of device that had been. While Lily was seen holding the camera at arms reach away from her, Cassie and Marlene had been on each side of her while Alice and Dorcas stood on their toes behind, all of them smiling.
"We look so young," Cassie commented while her eyes trailed over every one of the first years.
"We were young," Dorcas said, "Can you imagine that it's been six years already?"
Alice shook her head in disbelief as she smiled. "Somehow, it still feels like yesterday, though."
As Lily turned the page, she was met with another picture of her friends. A picture appeared at each page she turned, some from well-remembered memories while others from a time almost forgotten. It had been photos of all sorts of things happening throughout the years.
Pictures taken from their birthdays, trips to Hogsmeade, the times they managed to spend together during their vacations, such as their trip to London.
"Oh, I remember this." She snorted at the sight of a blue-haired Marlene and a green-haired Alice. It had been a prank they had tried to do a few years ago, the two had originally planned on dyeing Dorcas and Cassie's hair a different color, but unfortunately for them, the prank backfired.
"Oh god," Marlene cringed, burying her face in her hands, "I think it took at least a week to get the blue out of my hair."
"At least your color matched your eyes. I looked like a troll. A big green troll." Alice huffed, showing every bit of frustration on her face.
"According to Frank, you were a cute troll," Cassie grinned. "That ought to count for something." she giggled softly, earning a glare from her friend.
"Oh, what about this," Dorcas called out, her eyes pinned to a photo as Lily settled on a page.
The photo had been one of the most recent ones, being taken only last summer before they had gone home for the holidays. It had been after the final quidditch match, in which Gryffindor somehow had managed to win. The match had been long and extremely tiring as well, as James had been out of commission, occupying a bed in the hospital wing.
Though that didn't matter, as soon as the match was over, the entire house had gathered in the common room, music blasting as it echoed from the walls. High from their victory, the party had lasted long after sunset, and with red and gold paint decorating their faces, Alice had managed to get Frank to take a picture of the five girls, all huddled together with blinding smiles as happiness and pride shone brightly from their eyes.
Flipping the page, the next photo that appeared was a rather familiar one that had been taken just a month ago, that day in Hogsmeade when they went looking for dresses for the Christmas party. Thinking it was the last photo, Lily started to close the album as she turned her gaze to the blonde next to her.
"This is amazing, Marlene, truly. Thank you."
A knowing smile graced the blonde’s lips as she tipped her head back for a moment. "Why don't you turn the next page? Just because that's the last picture we took together does not mean that there aren't others."
Lily furred her brows in confusion as she eyed her friend strangely before turning to the book, taking notice that she hadn't even reached half of the pages that filled the thick album. As she flipped the page, her eyes widened, and her face went pale. Right in front of her, in the very album she had just received from her friend, was a picture of her and James during one of their study sessions. Seeing as they both were so caught up in their homework and the book that was laid open between them, it was clear to see that none of them had been aware of their sneaky friends.
"What th-" she stopped abruptly as she turned the page and landed on a picture taken in the common room. A picture that sent her face flaming with the deepest shade of red. How they had managed to take it, she had no idea, after all as far as she could remember, not that it was much, they had all been incredibly drunk. Though at some point, Lily could have sworn that she had seen Peter fiddling with a small black box, not too different looking from a camera now that she thought about it, but being as drunk as she had been, the redhead hadn't bothered given him any further attention.
Looking at the picture in front of her, Lily suddenly regretted that decision. Truthfully, as terrible as it sounded, she still couldn't remember kissing James. While Cassie and the others had filled her in the best they could, it was like hearing a story about a completely different person because as much as it was true, it didn't feel like it. At least not until her eyes landed on that picture.
Whatever she had painted for herself when laying alone in her bed, letting her curiosity wash over her, paled in comparison to the moving picture in the book. James's arms gripped her waist, holding her tightly, his eyes wide opened as he looked up at her in surprise. For a moment, Lily wasn't able to recognize herself. Despite the obvious redness that decorated her cheeks and the way she gazed almost lazily at him, a bright smile shone on her features. Her eyes flickered briefly before leaning in, letting the smile fade from her face as she kissed him.
James's eyes doubled in size, if that was even possible. He looked completely caught off guard, almost as if Professor McGonagall had told him that quidditch had been banned indefinitely.
"Oh god.." She mumbled slowly. "You didn't.."
"Peter did, but he was kind enough to give me a copy." Marlene grinned proudly. "I figured it would be a good opportunity to try and jog your memory." She leaned slightly forward, her eyes gleaming with excitement. "Did it work?"
Lily stared at the picture for a few moments, watching as the scene replayed itself over and over again. As she wrapped her arms around his neck, a stupid smile, she had never seen before spread across her features before leaning in, capturing his lips with hers. Her cheeks warmed softly as she couldn't help but think just how strange it was to see something she had no recognition of doing. "Sorry to disappoint you but no." A soft giggle appeared from Alice as the disappointment only seemed to grow on Marlene's face.
"Oh well..." The blonde shrugged.
The next few pages were filled with a few other pictures of the two taken by their sneaky group of friends. Most were taken when the two of them studied through two, in particular, stood out from the rest. It had been around the time of Slughorn’s Christmas party, just before she, along with James, Remus, and Cassie, had left the common room. She remembered it briefly as the moment they were about to leave, Alice had come flying down the stairs, panting deeply as she gripped a muggle camera in her hand. It didn't take long until she had managed to gather up the four friends. A bright smile danced on her face as Lily stood closely between Cassie and James, who both bore a similar expression.
Though she wasn't able to remember how his lips had tasted, the feeling of his warm hand lingering on her upper back, the moment the picture had been taken, burned vividly in her mind.
After a few turns of pages, she noticed the photos had stopped. As she closed the album, there was no denying the temptation that arose within her, how she just wouldn't like to look at them all again and study each picture and reminisce from the days when they were running around doing all sorts of things. Lily didn't think about it often, but it was moments like this when looking at the pictures she came to notice just how much time had passed and just how little they had left there.
"Thank you." Lily looked up, meeting Marlene's smile. "Truly, Marlene. Thank you." She fought the tears that started to gather in her eyes and leaned over to the blonde, wrapping her arms around her.
Marlene couldn't do anything but smile as she hugged her friend closer. "You're welcome." she smiled, unable to hide the happiness that masked her face. Although it had taken her many hours, if not days, to make this, it was all worth it just by seeing the look on Lily's face, especially when the redhead saw the moving picture of her drunken kiss, though she would keep that part to herself.
The moment they entered the great hall a little over an hour later, Lily was desperately aching for something to eat. She had barely made it out of their dormitory before a loud rumbling had erupted from her stomach, causing Cassie to burst out laughing, at least until a similar sound came from hers, which immediately shut her up, sending a fiery heat to her face.
The entirety of the walk had consisted of Marlene and Alice eagerly coming up with suggestions for things they could do for the remaining day, such as spending the day outside having snowball fights and building a whole quidditch team of snowmen. Spend some time in the common room playing exploding snap and just laze around, sneak off to the kitchen in hopes of convincing the house elves to whip up a cake for the birthday child. However, the last one was mostly Cassie's suggestion, who had been having a rather bad sweet tooth these past few days.
"You know, I wouldn't be surprised that the moment Lily turns her head, you'd pounce right on the cake," Dorcas smirked as she sat down at the table, keeping her eyes at her dark-haired friend.
"I would not." Cassie protested, "I would have at least waited until her entire body was turned away from the cake so she wouldn't see me."
"I don't think that sounds any better." Alice chuckled as she reached for a piece of toast.
Having witnessed this conversation for quite some time now, the corner of Lily's lips tilted upwards as a smile spread on her face. They all knew that Lily was never one to deny sharing her food, unlike Dorcas. After all, there was no way the redhead would be able to finish a whole cake by herself. Cassie would, and so would Alice. When it came to Marlene and Dorcas, it depended on the day and what they had eaten earlier. But no matter how many times Lily had tried, because she had, she always got sick when nearing half.
"You know what would be better than cake?" Marlene joined in excitedly.
Cassie looked up from her breakfast, not an ounce of amusement on her face as she retorted seriously. "There's nothing better than cake." Her voice was so serious it caused Lily to arch a brow.
"Not even Blue Delight?" She asked with a smug smile, already knowing what her friend's reaction would be.
A grimace passed Cassie's features as she furred her brows and flinched, almost as if the question had physically pained her. "I- Well, I didn't say that."
"Won't you look at that," Marlene grinned, "Apparently, there is something better than cake."
Cassie shot the blonde a look as she could only silently grumble to herself. Whipping the smug look off of her face, Lily leaned slightly forward, resting her elbows on the table as she looked at Marlene. "What were you about to say?"
"Well, what I was about to say before being so rudely interrupted." She grinned playfully at Cassie before continuing. "What would be better than cake would be some big mugs of warm, delicious butterbeer, or better yet, like Lily said, alcohol."
"Really, Marlene?" Dorcas sent her girlfriend an amused glance as she raised a brow. "It's not even ten o'clock, and you already want to start drinking?"
"So what? It's five o'clock somewhere." She smiled innocently, causing Dorcas to shake her head while grinning. After seeing the disapproving looks given to her by all her friends, except for her girlfriend, she couldn't help but add. "Of course, I'm not talking about now, in this particular moment, but later. You know, sometime tonight perhaps."
"Oh, I'm down for that." Alice smiled as she turned her attention to Cassie. "I don't think we've had a decent night of drinking together since your birthday. It would be fun."
That was, in fact, true. Though Lily and Cassie had been invited to Slughorn's Christmas party, the others hadn't. Even if they had, the Christmas party wouldn't have been equally as fun as the twins' birthday.
"I agree. I think It would be really fun."
A snicker filled the air as Dorcas raised her cup to her lips before saying. "Oh, I'm sure you do, Lils." Her eyes twinkled with a certain look that made Lily question herself if she should ask her friend to elaborate. However, there was no need, as the curly-haired girl suddenly added. "After all, I think we can all remember just how much fun you had last time, huh."
At that, Lily's face burst in colors, and her friends though some tried not to, burst out in laughs. "Oh, Merlin, you don't need to remind me." She groaned while burying her blushing face in both of her hands.
"You know, I'm almost sad that we weren't able to film it-" Lily's breath hitched as Cassie spoke. "I mean, how many times do you get to see Remus go all out and start dancing on the table. Not to mention Frank, who was sitting in Alice's top."
Lily's shoulders lowered as relief filled her. For a moment, she had been terrified that Cassie would bring up her drunken deed. After all, she already had a picture of it; there was certainly no need for a video. Though, there was no way Lily could deny that she wouldn't have liked to have some sort of replay of that entire night, mostly so that she would be able to remember what happened after she started passing around a bottle of firewhiskey with Dorcas and Cassie.
She could remember playing truth or dare with the group and the rest of the quidditch team, and she did have a brief recollection of daring Sirius to let everybody write something on his back with a marker and singing terribly off-key while twirling Dorcas around. What she couldn't remember, apart from the one incident that sent her face flaming and heart racing, was Remus, who had been dancing rather passionately at the table. Or the fact that they had to drag her up to the dormitory after passing out from her drunken deed.
"Besides Dorcas, don't act as if you've never done anything when drinking and forgotten about it the next day. You know, like that time last year when you started sprouting all sorts of things like Marlene was the most beautiful girl you had ever seen, that her smile shone brighter than Hogwarts at Christmas, not to mention that she could walk all over your face and you'd thank her. You know I'm pretty sure that you even said that you wanted to ask her out." The smug grin on Cassie's face as she spoke said everything, even Lily's lips curled upwards at the sound of the curly-haired girl choking on her breakfast while her face heated.
"I think the best part of that was the fact that it was Marlene you told all those things to, without even knowing it was her." Alice giggled, earning a smile from the blonde herself.
Marlene smiled as she remembered the moment her girlfriend had unknowingly admitted her feelings. "I thought it was cute. I mean, I didn't even know that she liked me before then. I remember being so confused the next day because she was acting as if nothing had happened, which of course made sense since she didn't remember it." She eyed her girlfriend before smiling amusingly while wiggling her finger. "So you, my dear, shouldn't go around teasing Lily too much when you did the same thing."
Even though Dorcas rolled her eyes, soft color decorated her cheeks while she smiled lovingly at the blonde across her. "Had I not been drunk out of my mind, I would have done something much more romantic than that." For a moment, it seemed like the two slipped into their own dreamy world of romance. In the meantime, their three friends shared a look and bit back a snort at what Dorcas had said.
"Anyway," Dorcas reluctantly looked away and met a pair of green eyes as she continued. "The reason why I keep bringing it up is so that you can stop running from it."
"I'm not running from anything." Lily quickly shot back. "Besides, there's not even anything to run from."
"Now that my friend is where you're wrong. I thought so too, but had it not been for Marlene, who kept bugging me for days after it happened, I'm not sure we would have gotten together then. What I'm trying to say is that, so yes, you kissed James, now's your chance."
"My chance for what?" her voice dripped heavily of suspicion as her eyes narrowed slightly.
"To tell him how you feel, of course."
Had Lily been drinking her pumpkin juice at that moment, she would have spit it right out. Surely she must have heard Dorcas wrong. "I'm sorry, for a moment, it seemed as if you implied that I have some sort of romantic feelings for- for him."
"Oh, you don't? My bad." Dorcas retorted as she rolled her eyes.
A snicker came from Alice, who quickly lifted her toast to her mouth and took a bite to hide her growing laugh. Marlene watched with pure amusement while Cassie was busy fighting off a grin. "Are you really going to gang up on me on this?"
"We are not ganging up on you on anything. We are not even saying anything." Cassie quickly defended them, which earned her a pointed look.
"That's pretty much the same as ganging up on me."
"Who's ganging up on you?" A voice much deeper than any of them spoke, and suddenly Lily felt every hair on her body rise as she felt caught off guard for a moment. The voice was painfully familiar as it rang through her ears, causing her to straighten her back.
As she looked up, the warm hazel eyes of the boy they were just talking about met hers, and suddenly something turned in her stomach. How long had he been there, she thought, just how much had he heard before deciding to speak up.
"James... I didn't see you there." Her voice wavered slightly as she spoke, though she covered it quickly up with adding. "Where are the rest of you?"
A certain light shone in his eyes as he grinned slightly. "They will be coming soon. Peter and Sirius forgot something at the common room."
"Unlike them, I'd rather not go all the way back before a proper breakfast, that is," Remus added in as he appeared behind his dark-haired friend. "Oh, by the way, happy birthday Lily." He said, smiling warmly as he sat down next to Cassie, who immediately held a hand towards him under the table.
A red brow rose slightly as Lily couldn't help but watch the two friends. Remus's eyes trailed around them for a moment before he sneaked his hand into his pocket and pulled something that looked very much like a bar of chocolate, and handed it to Cassie.
"You are my hero Remus," she said while unwrapping the paper and discreetly started to break off pieces and put them in her mouth. "What would I do without you."
"Suffer endlessly, no doubt." He grinned deviously while starting to pile his plate with food.
"How did you even know that she wanted chocolate?" Alice tilted her head as she gazed curiously at the taller boy and shorter girl, who shared a look.
"I'm just that good." He joked, earning a smile and a disbelieving shake of the head from the person next to him.
A snort appeared next to Lily, and it was first then she noticed that the other boy had taken his seat right next to her. Though trying not to, she couldn't help but study him for a moment, as discreetly as she could, of course.
Her eyes trailed over his face as he laughed along to something Alice had said. There was something different about him, she thought, though she couldn't quite place it. It wasn't the way he dressed. That was pretty much the same as always. A pair of jeans and a dark blue knitted sweater that most likely was made by his mother. She trailed his chin, the curve of his smiling mouth, and his nose that was occupied by his familiar pair of glasses. For a short moment, Lily almost felt frustrated. There was something different, but she didn't quite know what it was, that was until her eyes landed on his hair.
"Did you brush your hair this morning, James?"
His face flushed as he looked at her though he looked slightly surprised that she had even noticed it. "You almost make it sound like I've never touched a hairbrush in my life."
"No, it's just that it seems tidier this morning, that's all."
"You see, James, brushes his hair every day. It is just that he hasn't had the opportunity to run his fingers through it yet. Just wait a few hours, then I assure you it will be like normal." Remus said, sending a sly grin to his best friend.
"By the way," James suddenly spoke up, fully ready it seemed to change the subject surrounding his hair. Though even so, his gaze still lingered on Lily as he smiled softly. "I don't believe I said it, but happy birthday."
The beginning of a smile worked its way to her face. "Thank you."
"So, how does it feel being one year older?" His eyes gleamed with amusement as he spoke.
Lily toyed with her lower lip for a moment willing herself to bite back the small chuckle that was building inside her.
"I don't feel any different. I mean, it's not like I'm a year older than yesterday, technically speaking. Besides, it's not the years that count. It's what you experience between them."
"Bloody hell, it seems that a seventeen-year-old Lily Evans is wiser than the sixteen-year-old. Are you just trying to show off now that you're a year older?"
"Oh, shut it, Dorcas." Lilly retorted with a playful glare. "Just because the number of your age changes doesn't make that person immediately smarter or wiser. I mean, look at Cassie." She said, giving a slight nod in her direction.
"Wow, thanks," Cassie answered, staring bewildered at the redhead before adding. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing," Lily quickly stressed. " I'm just pointing out that on your seventeen birthday, you sent off a drunken letter to your fiance, calling Marlene a demon goblin mutant."
"We were all drunk. Anyway, I don't think I should be all that embarrassed about the letter. After all, I think that in a way, it might have helped us."
James's hazel eyes twinkled as he leaned slightly forward in his seat so that he could see her properly. "How so?"
"Well-"
Lily tuned out of the conversation as she noticed or rather felt a strange sensation crawl from her neck and spread all over her body. She eyed her friends briefly, finding them all caught up in their own things or conversations, with Cassie and James talking about her and Rabastan, Remus who listened closely at their conversation and added a few comments here and there with a knowing smile, Alice who had now been joined by Frank sat chattering with Dorcas and Marlene, while Sirius and Peter were still not to be seen.
The feeling nagging her grew so intense after a while that she was half tempted to get up and leave, hoping that wherever she went, it would know better than to follow her. Her eyes gazed down at the plate filled with nothing but a few leftover crumbs from her breakfast, which had only been a slice of toast she had managed to sneak in between the conversations with her friends. Even as a lingering feeling of hunger lay about in her stomach, it wasn't enough to convince her to stay as the uncomfortable feeling of someone staring at her almost seemed to grow with each second.
"I think I'm gonna head back now." Lily smiled gently, though struggled immensely with keeping the clear discomfort from showing on her face.
"Are you sure?" Cassie asked as she looked up, "you have hardly eaten anything,"
"I'm just not feeling all that hungry anymore. I just want to go over my charms essay one more time before we have to deliver it tomorrow, as well as take a shower. Besides, I'm almost certain that in two-three hours tops, we'll be sitting in the kitchen eating cake." The lie rolled off her tongue so easily you'd think she was telling the truth. Though in some cases she were, Lily had, after all, wanted to look over her essay as well as take a nice warm shower to loosen the tension that had been weighing her down for the last days, but those were just small excuses for why she wanted to leave.
As she gave them a final smile and left, Lily was positive that though she might have been able to fool some of the others, Cassie had not been one of them. The way her friend's brow tilted upwards before the redhead left all but indicated that the older girl knew there was something up. Cassie didn't know what it was, but something was definitely up.
The feeling followed her the entire way from her seat at the table until she reached the great hall and stepped outside. As she entered the hallway, an undeniable sense of relief filled her, causing her shoulders to drop significantly. It was almost incredible that she hadn't noticed how tense she had been; truly, it was no surprise that she hadn't been able to fool Cassie as her shoulders had been tense almost all the way up to her ears.
Lily couldn't help the deep sigh that somehow managed to make its way out of her mouth, though as if suddenly remembering something, her shoulders tensed slightly once more, and there was an urge in her steps that drove her faster from the great hall and to the common room. If it had been who she thought it had, who's to say that he wouldn't show up on her way back. Her steps picked up their speed as the thought appeared, wanting nothing more than to get out of the danger zone as quickly as possible. It was ridiculous, it truly was, but she could already imagine what would happen if he caught up with her, the argument that might very well break out between the two of them, and for one, she wasn't sure she even had the energy for that. Not today.