You're Moving on / to Far and Beyond / While I'm Standing Left Behind
Kaori was dead. Thats all that Shizuku knew that morning when she woke up.
Her angel finally returned above, and as selfish as it was, she didnt want that.
Shizuku had hope, something Kaori taught her, and it failed her.
For the next few days, her beloved's death was the only thing on her mind.
Most days she cried her eyes out, as though it could bring her back to life.
It couldnt and Shizuku knew that.
Thats what made it hurt even more.
Of course, she ended up visiting at some point, reading Kaori's diary and letter to her, everything.
Kaori didnt want Shizuku to follow her, that was clear.
Shizuku knew that and yet, the only thing her mind said was to do exactly that.
Sure, she was doing better now, but without Kaori, she was nothing.
Without her sun, she was simply a cloud, withering away.
It didnt matter if she could have another sun.
It didnt matter that she had plenty of other clouds with her.
She needed the sun more than anything.
Even if it meant she had to give up her life.
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
That night, Shizuku wrote her letters.
To everyone out there, even to Seri and Ruri.
She explained to them everything, from when she initially thought of this, to now.
Maybe if they knew everything, they wouldn't be saddened by her passing.
If they knew this couldn't have been prevented, maybe they wouldn't care.
She made sure to wrap her letters nicely.
Shizuku left them neatly on her desk.
Was there anything she even had to live for?
Maybe for Kaori, maybe for Shizuka and her mother.
But what was the point?
Shizuku was a selfish girl, after all.
So, she crept into the kitchen, hopefully not waking anyone up, and grabbed the sharpest knife she could find.
And with that, she had completed her mission, and crept back upstairs, gently closing the door behind her.
Shizuku brought the knife to her stomach, hesitating as she held it out in front of her.
It would hurt, wouldnt it?
But she deserved to hurt, she couldnt even see Kaori on her funeral!
What kind of girlfriend was she, to miss Kaori's funeral?
A bad one.
And a even more pathetic one.
That simple thought ended Shizuku's hesitation.
She stabbed herself, aware of the almost shocking pain, before pulling out the knife and stabbing again.
It hurt.
Badly.
It brought tears to her eyes.
But she kept stabbing, until she didnt have the strength to go on.
One last time, she pulled the knife out, suddenly aware she had fallen to the floor at some point and slit her throat.
She wouldnt be found alive at any costs.
And with that, Shizuku closed her eyes, hoping that when she opened them once again, her Kaori would be welcoming her, with the wings and halo she deserved.