A New Nickname (Nami's POV)
As you and Nami are heading down the hall after exiting the classroom, a hand grabs onto Nami’s shoulder and shakes it a little. Nami insists that she’ll meet you in the locker room in a few minutes, pushing you lightly until you continue making your way down the hall on your own. The owner of the hand is none other than Luffy, of course, so she greets his frown with a sly smile. She expected this, considering how he was looking over at his two friends longingly like he was a kicked puppy the entire class period.
“Who’s Y/N and why didn’t she save me and Zoro seats?” he asks with a pout. “You answered your own question there, Luffy, she doesn’t know you. I’ve known her just as long as I’ve known you, she’s my running buddy,” she replies.
“Then why did she save Usopp a seat, too, of all people?” he whines, clearly still feeling left out. “They met through Kaya, I think at some art show thing?” she says, letting the lie slip easily from her lips. Even if she wouldn’t be there from tomorrow on, she now had to come up with some kind of lie in order to keep the three other girls' food safe. Luffy could not find out you guys all had the same lunch, or else Usopp’s attempt to keep Kaya’s food out of Luffy's hands would turn out to be useless.
“Hmmhm,” he grunts. Then like a lightbulb going off above his head, his frown turns into his characteristic wide smile, “Mhmm! She’ll just have to become my friend then, and then you guys will move over to where we’re sitting, right?”
“Fat chance Luffy. We honestly have the best seats in the class. Plus, Robin said to stay in the same seats from now on so it’s easier to take attendance,” Nami replies with a bit of satisfaction.
She will hold off the doofuses from you as long as she is able to spare you. Unfortunately, she couldn’t spare you from Sanji already, but maybe she could do some damage control.
Nami opens the locker room door with much more force than necessary, announcing her entrance quite abruptly when the door crashes against the door stopper with a large thud.
“Tell me what happened with Sanji,” she says, opening the locker next to yours. “Oh I- uhm,” you stutter out, “-er, he sat next to me in my third block,” you manage to say averting your eyes with an interesting look on your face. Nami’s known you long enough and dished enough tea with you to know you’re trying to hide your disgust, meaning her assumptions were correct.
Let’s just say you aren’t the most observant when it comes to other people’s affections towards you. However, when it’s too obvious for you to remain oblivious, you kind of end up just standing there looking like a deer caught in headlights. Nami’s seen it before, but knows that underneath that look of utter shock, you would rather be ripping your eyeballs out and throwing them at whoever was causing you to exist in such a state of distress. Honestly, with how Sanji flirts, she’s surprised you showed up to lunch with your eyeballs intact.
“No need to say anything more; girl, your face says it all . Don’t worry, I’ll tell him to leave you be,” she says with a small smile while squeezing your shoulder to comfort you. “I actually told him to tone it down to zero because it makes me feel uncomfortable,” you replied. “Before that though, I thought I was gonna spontaneously combust,” you say in a humorous tone.
Since you’re in a joking mood now, you give Nami a brief synopsis of just how miserable 3rd block was for you. “Huh, I’m impressed you didn’t come to lunch as a burnt corpse then! Now you just gotta keep it up for the rest of the semester,” she says with a sarcastic smile and a thumbs up.
“...Maybe a little warning from you would help, he still called me ‘dear’ immediately after the whole ‘I’m uncomfortable’ thing,” you reply with a slight scowl.
“No problem, I got you. He’s gotten his fair share of welts from his attempts to flatter me ~if you can even call it that~, and you know I can take a compliment or two,” Nami says with a confident smile and a wink. She knows she kind of serves as a mean guard dog towards boys when she’s around her friends, especially around your oblivious ass, but she doesn’t mind.
“So, the king of the doofuses is the kid with the straw hat, right?” you ask. “Yup, just don’t call him that in front of him or the others, ‘kay?” Nami says in return, but more as a warning than a question.
“Gotcha,... is his name seriously Luffa? Like the shower thing?” you ask looking up to Nami for a second before returning to finish repacking your school clothes into your backpack.
Oh, that’s a new one. It’s also rich, because this is quite literally gold. Nami knows she’s going to have so much fun with this. You guys won’t interact for a little while as long as she can help it anyway. What’s the harm in affirming your assumption that his name is actually Loofah?
She starts nodding her head with a mischievous smile, before she realizes you’re still occupied with your bag. ‘Okay, you got this Nami, just play it off normally, like it’s a normal question and not the most hilarious thing you’ve ever heard,’ she thinks to herself.
“Mhm,” she hums in confirmation to your humorous assumption. “Huh, well that’s an interesting name, at the very least,” you joke as you and Nami both finish up changing, ready to head out of the locker room.
‘Oh, this is going to be so fun,’ is all Nami can think while smiling to herself all the way to practice.
About a week has passed into the new semester so far. And somehow, you still had not caught on that his name wasn’t Loofah. To be fair, it wasn’t really brought up at all, surprisingly.
Nami told Usopp, just to make sure he didn’t randomly correct you or Nami when incorrectly saying Luffy’s name. He thought it was hilarious, too, and didn’t want to get on Nami’s bad side anyway, so he’d keep up the little farce for the time being.
Also, Robin stopped taking attendance verbally after the second class, and Luffy interrupted her even quicker the second time around, so no need to worry about that. Nami just hopes that a substitute ends up ruining the running gag before the pay off.
Excluding the first official practice of the season, you really didn’t ask anymore questions about ‘Loofah’ or the group. Nami figures she must have gone pretty in depth about how they became a friend group in middle school because for once, you didn’t have any questions. Or maybe she had warned you enough about the doofuses for you to be generally uninterested.
Usopp is the exception, of course, especially since you found out you had a lot more in common with than you thought, despite his anxious tendencies. The art show thing Nami made up on the spot wasn’t too far out, both of you ended up placing in the same art festival this past spring, even though you didn’t end up meeting. They didn’t hand out awards individually like with a podium like they do for races, just hanging the ribbons on the works of art to commemorate them. Nami thinks it’s kind of funny to see how you’ve existed in parallel to the group for so long but never actually interacted.
Nami sometimes wonders about the time period in 7th grade where you two were practically ‘frenemies.’ At the time, you both kind of just pissed each other off. Something she’s realized since then, though she’d never admit to it, was that she was jealous. She wasn’t sure if she was jealous of you or your best friend that you talked about so much, but it pissed her off to no end. Not only that, but at first you didn’t take running seriously at all, until all of a sudden, you shaved minutes off your time and were faster than her. What the hell? She was supposed to be the prodigy… how could she make a name for herself (and make some berry along with it) if you were outshining her while praising some blue-haired bimbo.
She praises the lord that she has matured enough to realize her hatred of you was stupid. It was short lived anyway, she just couldn’t stay hateful of you when all you did was be kind to her and talk about normal everyday things. Nami isn’t sure what reasons you had for lowkey hating her at the time, but maybe you just noticed her bitchiness standoffish behavior, internalized it, and it manifested itself that way? You did always joke about how the beef between you ‘was for no reason at all,’ so maybe you truly didn’t have any problem with her? If you did notice her behavior, have you forgiven her for it? It seems like you had, but Nami wasn’t even sure she could forgive herself for hating you for such childish reasons.
Meeting Vivi didn’t help her overcome her guilt either. No wonder you talked about her all the time. If her best friend was as smart, as kind, as beautiful as Vivi, she wouldn’t have shut up… ever. At least you had the decency to talk about other topics besides the girl with blue hair. Nami just can’t believe she ever harbored so much hatred for the concept of a person who, in all actuality, is just so… perfect.
Even though she didn’t have lunch with you, Vivi, and Kaya anymore, you all still met up at the same bench each morning before the first bell. Nami found herself urging Nojiko to leave earlier and earlier as the days went on, just so she could spend more time with her new group of friends. She didn’t mind that you only showed up a few minutes before the bell because you took the bus, or the fact that Kaya mostly kept to herself. It just meant more time to talk to Vivi.
Just because you didn’t ask about him doesn’t mean Nami didn’t notice things. Like the way Luffy glanced at you throughout class, especially considering how obvious it was since you were in the opposite direction of the board. She had noticed how you could sense someone looking at you, just to look up from your notes to find everyone paying attention facing the board, while he would be absentmindedly picking at something in his teeth. She could tell that Luffy gave up on the seating arrangement ordeal, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t going to try to be friends with you anyway. Maybe he was just biding his time. 'Is that even possible for him?'
She just wanted to be there when it happened. ‘It’ being when you evidently call him “Loofah” to his face. Oh she couldn’t wait. Although Luffy’s ego wasn’t enormous like some people’s, she still couldn’t wait to see him deflate like a balloon when ‘it’ eventually happened.
Another thing Nami couldn’t help but notice was that Luffy was pretty out and loud with his jokes. The fact that it seemed he didn’t mind that Robin could hear him from behind the teacher’s desk was pretty bold. In middle school, if he thought of something funny, he’d say it just loud enough for his friends to hear. Nami suspects that it’s probably because Zoro isn’t that captive of an audience alone- maybe giving a slight exhale of a laugh or a small smirk at most. Maybe he’s adding volume so that Nami and Usopp can join in? But then why is he looking to you for your reaction first? Hmmm…
Nami decides to leave it alone for the time being. Then, a few weeks into class, Robin asks the class if there are similarities between the historical figure the teacher was just covering and anyone else throughout history. You raise your hand, of course, since you actually read the assigned reading and a full hard drive filled with knowledge for a brain. Before Robin can call on you, someone else’s hand raises excitedly. Then, without being called on, Luffy shouts, “do you know who else has staged a coup after wrongfully convincing people to lose faith in the current leaders? MY MOM.”
Nami sees your hand shoot down, just to see it… cover your mouth? Were you really that shocked about his outburst? There were a few chuckles and giggles around the room, but what you’re doing is unprecedented. Then you put your face in both of your hands, and she thinks she hears your breath start to sound choppy. Are you crying? Over something so stupid? She turns to you, about to put a hand on your shoulder before she realizes… you’re trying to stifle your laughter. Not a little giggle or snicker as she’d expect from you, but full on laughter. It honestly looks painful how much you’re trying to hold it in, almost like you were trying to stop yourself from throwing up.
You manage to pull yourself together, surprisingly, but still let out a small giggle. Wow . Nami didn’t expect that, least of all from you. Your hands shift away from your face, one returning to pinch the bridge of your nose, and wait… did you really laugh so hard you cried and are now trying to wipe your tears nonchalantly?
She may have not really understood what the joke was, but one thing she knows for sure, Nami is not going to let you live this down.
Practice is anything but normal. You are trying to convince Nami that the joke was actually funny enough to deserve a real laugh, and she’s not buying it. At least that’s what you think ~ or that’s what she lets you think.
On the other hand, Nami is sure it was funny- to you at least. But she has a scheme to make your life a tiny bit more miserable. Despite the fact that you still complained about Sanji and his advances on the daily, it had actually toned down quite a lot, especially after Nami's threats of castration on your behalf. Maybe you needed a little more boy drama in your life. Or maybe Nami just wanted to pick on you for something other than being a know-it-all. That is how you got the joke anyway, she was sure of it. Your pleas include some sort of explanation of some cartoon called ‘Regular Show,’ along with something about world events, and she thinks she heard you say something to do with Alabasta?
Honestly Nami didn’t know or really care at the moment, she was pulling some strings. She’d already managed to convince most of the people on the team not to say anything about you or her calling him ‘Loofah,’ but this was going to take a little more finesse.
Her plan was to convince the girls team that you had a crush on him. “Why else could you be laughing so hard at such an unfunny joke, huh?” It basically wrote itself, and with your desperate pleas for her and the others to understand the joke, you were kind of just digging the hole deeper.
As a cherry on top, she just needed to convince the girls to not let anyone outside the girls know, because if either brother found out, Nami would most likely have hell to pay… but more so “that they should get together naturally, with no meddlesome teenage boys trying to intervene for them. What do they know about love anyway?” God it was so easy to spin this. Should Nami consider a life in journalism? She could honestly kill in a spin room. ‘Spinning drama is a side hustle, not a full time gig, at least for me,’ she thinks.
Nami knew you were literally dying inside. Hell, you genuinely still believed his name was Loofah for heaven’s sake. You also hadn’t exchanged a single word with him. You didn’t know a single thing about him except for what she had told you herself. You probably didn’t even know Ace was his brother either.
All of that didn’t really matter though. She couldn’t help but find a bit of joy in tormenting you about a crush you didn’t have on a boy you didn’t know. The teasing from the girls team was expected. Nami even joined in from time to time, but mostly she just sat back with a smile watching the chaos she caused ensue.
It’s even worse on the mile cool-down. The girls shout your name at the start of the chant, “... & STRAW HAT SITTING IN A TREE…” Honestly, Nami’s impressed with the team’s ability to just ‘run’ (lol) with it. “K-I-S-S-I-N-G,” they spell. Nami hears your pleas, begging them to stop. “FIRST COMES LOVE, THEN COMES MARRIAGE,” before being interrupted by you, “FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, STOP! I DON’T EVEN KNOW HIM.” “Ok, but don’t come crawling back to us when you end up with a straw hat baby in a baby carriage,” one of the girls says, finishing the chant. Since you’ve reached the half mile point, you turn around rather than finishing the lap around the school’s campus with them continuing to tease you. It looked like you had tears in your eyes. Nami is about to follow, until one of the only girls who didn’t join in stops her, “I’ll go. I don’t know what you intended, but I hope it wasn’t this. This got way out of hand Nami.”
At this point Nami wasn’t sure what she expected. Maybe some light teasing, maybe a ‘running’ (lol again, sorry) joke for the season, maybe you calling him Loofah in front of the whole team, maybe for you to be a little annoyed at her, but this? It stung that she actually hurt you. This went too far. She didn’t expect that. Just like she didn’t expect the girls to dub you the nickname “straw hat girl.” And least of all did she expect for the new nickname to actually stick.
She could do nothing at this point but urge them to stop, knowing they wouldn’t. Honestly, it got out of control the second she started scheming. She hoped you would see her regret and forgive her. Maybe not right now, but eventually... and maybe when that day comes, she'll be able to start forgiving herself for all the trouble she's caused you.
In the meantime, she needed to rack her brain to think of a damn good apology to you before tomorrow.