Chapter 2
“What business do you have in King Granger’s castle?” the guard asked her.
Bellatrix picked up the sack of flour from the wheelbarrow and pushed it in the man’s face. “Pastries. I am the new baker.” She looked back at the two fools pushing the wheelbarrow. “And they are my helpers.”
The guard narrowed his eyes at her and said, “I wasn’t informed of any new baker for the castle.”
And that, to Bellatrix, was what truly sealed the guard’s fate. He could have easily let them through. Instead, he questioned Bellatrix, who was already operating on borrowed time trying to get to the Princess Hermione. So she had no other choice but to magick a poisonous apple from under her cloak for the man. “May I offer you an apple?”
“What? I didn’t say anything about an apple. I said no one told me about a new baker for the cast—“ Before he could finish his thought, a bright blue light flew over Bellatrix’s shoulder and struck the man square in the forehead. In its wake was a sad little pumpkin.
“Cissy!”
“Really, you were taking too long.” Cissy pulled the hood down from over her head and flicked the residual sparks of magic from her fingers. “I’ve got my own kingdom to rule over, Bella. I can’t spend my entire day waiting for an unsuspecting fool to take a bite out of your poison apple. That’s what got us here in the first place.”
“She’s got a point.” There was another spark of blue magic. Then Andy walked over to the pumpkin and placed a sign down against it. Be back soon. “And we are not your helpers. At least make us bakers too.”
“Take your sisters, mother said,” Bellatrix mocked. It would be the last time she’d enlist their help. She looked down at the pumpkin-man again. “I don’t know the spell to reverse that, so the pumpkin is your responsibility now, Cissy.”
“He turns back at midnight. Unlike you, I know how my spells work.”
“What if someone accidentally steps on the pumpkin and crushes it?”
Cissy looked almost scandalized by the question. “Don’t be ridiculous. Who would not see a pumpkin on the ground?”
“I don’t know, horses? Evil stepsisters? An evil stepmother?”
“I don’t have time for your twenty-one questions, Bella. We need to get into the castle so you could find this prince to kiss the princess, for her to wake up to meet her demise by you again.”
“Then let’s get going,” Bellatrix said.
They pushed the wheelbarrow through the castle entrance and went around the back to where the kitchen was. She instructed her sisters to stay put as to not draw attention to themselves even as they whined about it.
“Why can’t we come? What are we supposed to do here?”
“I don’t know. You wanted to be a baker so bake something!”
--
Bellatrix stood at the bottom of the stairway and listened for Princess Hermione’s heartbeat in the castle. Lup-dup, lup-dup. The Princess Hermione was in the third room on the top floor, Bellatrix realized. So she climbed the winding stairway, dodging into corners and rooms to avoid detection. After some time, Bellatrix found herself standing outside the Princess Hermione’s door. She pushed it open.
The princess was sleeping on her bed at the center of the room, still lifeless as when Bellatrix last saw her. “Hermione Granger,” she whispered, as that weird feeling came to grip her chest again. Bellatrix frowned when the princess did not answer her. Cautiously, she approached the princess' bed and leaned over her lifeless body to examine her further. It looked like the servants had put some make-up on her to give her some more color, but the lipstick color they chose for her was too garish. It didn't suit the princess' pretty, delicate complexion at all. So Bellatrix wiped at the princess’s lips, and the red lipstick smudged on her thumb.
“Let me say my goodbyes to the Princess first.”
Bellatrix was startled by the sound of someone's voice on the other side of the door. But before she could act, the door swung open and in entered a tall, blocky looking man.
“Who are you?” he asked her, equally surprised by her presence.
Scoundrel. How dare he questioned her? She shot him a glare. “Who are you?”
The man straightened his back and ran his hands down the front of his shirt. “I am Prince Phillip.”
A prince. Perhaps he was the princess’ betrothed. “Are you the one to marry the princess?”
“Yes, I am,” he said slowly.
“Perfect! Then you must kiss her now.”
The man looked affronted by Bellatrix’s request, hands crossed in front of his chest defiantly now. “You do not get to order me around, especially when you haven’t even told me who you are.”
“I am the Princess Hermione Granger’s—“ Bellatrix paused, unsure of how to characterize their relation. “I am her person.”
“Her… person?”
“Yes,” Bellatrix waved off his annoying question. She and Hermione Granger were surely not friends, as Bellatrix was trying to rid of her. And Bellatrix was obviously not going to lie and claim that she was something as lowly as her servant. “I am someone who is here to help the princess wake up.”
The stupid man looked dumb and confused.
“Now I am told that true love’s kiss will wake the princess up from her coma. Since you are the one to marry her, you must kiss her.”
He narrowed his eyes at Bellatrix and then puffed out a long breath. “Alright, but no word about my kissing the princess leaves this room should I fail.”
Bellatrix nodded.
The man approached the princess, looked down at her lifeless form and said, “My dear, fear not, I am here to wake you up from your coma. It will be my--”
“Get on with it, will you? I asked you to wake her up, not bore her to death with your words.”
He looked back at Bellatrix with an irritated scowl but said nothing else. Gingerly, he caressed the princess’ right cheek and bent down to place a chaste kiss on her lips.
Then they stood there and waited. And waited and waited and waited, but nothing happened. Not even a snap, crackle, or pop.
“Well, I guess that settles that. As you promised—“
Bellatrix pulled out her wand and aimed it at him. “You frog!” A bright blue light flowed out of the tip and struck the prince square in his chest. His face and body twisted and contorted until he was fully transformed into the green, leathery creature she accused him of being.
Ribbit.
“How dare you.”
Ribbit.
“I let you kiss her with your ugly mouth, and you couldn’t even wake her up!”
Bellatrix stepped closer to the princess and the frog jumped out of her path. “I had to stand here and watch him kiss you all for nothing,” she said, frowning down at the princess. Bellatrix stared at Hermione Granger’s pretty pink lips. “All for nothing. I must take you back to mother. She will know of a way to wake you.”
The frog came back and landed wetly on her right boot.
“You will not stop me, you ugly frog. Now be gone or I will sell you to the highest bidder in the market on my way out.”
He jumped away again.
Carefully, Bellatrix helped the princess into a sitting position. Then she took Hermione’s arm and draped it over her shoulder. The princess proved to be as light as she looked when her whole body weight fell against Bellatrix’s as they stood. Slowly, Bellatrix walked them to the door. It opened on her command and then shut behind them, leaving only the frog now locked in the room.
—
Bellatrix had never known more patience than when she carried the princess down the stairway, one step at a time. When she arrived at the kitchen after leaving the princess to rest in a hidden alcove, she found her sisters deeply engaged in their baking.
“Cissy. Andy,” she hissed at them.
They looked at her, wide-eyed, as though momentarily shocked by her presence. And then something like realization dawned on Cissy’s face.
“Oh, hi, Bella. We were just baking cookies,” Cissy said. “We felt compelled to correct the kitchen’s cookie recipe and show them how good cookies are made.”
“Charming.” Bellatrix inclined her head in the direction of the alcove. “I will be needing your assistance now.”
Irritatingly, her sisters gave the staff a very long goodbye before following Bellatrix out of the kitchen. “You two are so annoying sometimes.”
“Yes, we are the annoying ones, says the woman with the comatose princess on her hands.” Andy looked down at the sleeping princess resting against the wall of the alcove. “We’ve now relegated to abduction I see.”
“The true love’s kiss didn’t wake her, so I’ve determined that we need to bring her back to mother for help. Where’s that wheel barrow of yours, Andy?”
“You know you sound really condescending when you say things that way. That wheel barrow of yours, like it’s some kind of embarrassing crime to own a wheel barrow.”
“It is embarrassing.” Bellatrix rolled her eyes. “Now the wheel barrow, please?”
Andy grumbled and left to retrieve what would now be Hermione Granger’s vehicle of escape.
Narcissa looked back at Bellatrix when Andy was fully out of sight. “She is right. You use that tone a lot, Bella. There’s nothing wrong with Andy’s wheel barrow. You talk that way about my library too, and I would have you know that my library is not embarrassing.”
“What is this, Pick on Bella Day? Fine, I will apologize to Andy about her dumb wheel barrow, and I am sorry that I told everyone your library was ugly.”
“You said what?!”
“I’m back,” declared Andy as she pushed her wheel barrow through the alcove. She looked between a miffed Cissy and am increasingly annoyed Bellatrix. “What did I miss?”
“Oh nothing. Just that Bella here has been bad-mouthing my library to everyone she knows.”
“Don’t be so dramatic, Cissy. It’s not like your library has feelings. And everyone already knows you spend all your time tending to that thing. No one actually believes it’s the ugliest place I’ve ever set my eyes on.”
“Bella, I’m going to pretend like I didn’t hear that.”
“Good.” Bellatrix pointed at the wheel barrow. “Now help me get the princess in the wheel barrow.”
—
Their mother was very surprised when they returned with the princess in Andy’s wheel barrow.
“Normally the Prince Charming kisses the sleeping princess and wake her up. In no retelling of the story that I heard did she get ushered away in a wheel barrow,” her mother said thoughtfully.
“Mother, let’s not concern ourselves with that detail right now. I’ve brought her back to you because the cure didn’t work.”
“Yes, and she interrupted our baking and made us push the princess the whole way back.” Narcissa dramatically stretched her fingers and wrists out like Bella and Andy did not do most of the heavy lifting the entire way.
“My dear, it should have worked.”
Bellatrix threw her hands up. “Clearly it didn’t, mother.”
Her mother inclined her head. “Perhaps that’s a result of the person and not the method.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means that the prince who kissed her was not her true love,” said Cissy matter of factly, like she’d known this all along. She sat down on one of mother’s kitschy looking chaise things and gestured for the servant to pour her some tea.
“So how do we find her true love?” Bellatrix asked, exasperation lining her voice.
Her mother studied her face intently before her eyes softened. “Girls, let your sister Bellatrix and I have the room for a moment.”
Cissy sighed and stood, tea cup in hand. “Let us go, Andy,” she said as she linked her free arm through Andy’s. “Looks like it wasn’t a worthless trip, after all.”
“Huh?” Andy looked between Cissy and her mother. “What am I missing?”
“You’ll find out soon enough,” Cissy added as she pulled Andy along. “After Bellatrix is done raising hell and being insufferable about it.”
They closed the door behind them, giving Bellatrix and her mother their privacy.
“Mother, I don’t understand.”
“Bella, do you really not understand? Or are you telling yourself that you don’t?”
She pouted. Why can’t people just be straightforward with her? All these riddles and meanings between the lines.
Her mother came to lay a gentle hand on her shoulder. “Tell me why you wanted to wake her up after you tried to rid of her.”
“Because—“
“And don’t give me that same reason from before. I didn’t believe it then, and I won’t believe it now.”
“If you hadn’t believed me then, why did you put me on this path?”
“I wanted to see if what I suspected was true. And, Bella, I didn’t put you on this path. You were the one who felt like she needed to be brought back here. You wanted to save her.”
“So now what do I do?”
Her mother smiled back at her. “I think you already know.” And just like that, she said nothing else and left Bellatrix alone with the princess.
“Why is everyone like this?” Bellatrix asked the sleeping princess. “Are you like this too?”
Unsurprisingly, the princess could not respond to her questions. Bellatrix studied the princess’ face, as though her features might clue Bellatrix in on the answers. “I bet you’re not like them.” Then her eyes found Hermione’s lips, like earlier. That warm, overwhelming feeling coursed through her body again. No. Bellatrix stumbled back two steps. Absolutely not. She was not going to entertain the idea that she and Hermione Granger…
“No one’s here, though,” Bellatrix whispered to herself. She could just… give Hermione a quick peck on the lips and see if it worked, like her mother insinuated. No harm, no foul. There was no one here to turn her into a frog if it failed. And if Hermione did wake up, well, Bellatrix would just deny that it had anything to do with that storybook hocus pocus. Yes, that was an excellent plan. She should just do it instead of thinking about the hundred different ways it could go wrong. That gene belonged to Cissy, anyway.
“Okay, Hermione.” Bellatrix stepped back into the princess’ space and leaned down. Apples and parchment paper. What a wonderful scent, she thought, as her eyes fluttered shut and she closed the distance between their lips.