Kate
When Kate woke up the bed was cool and empty, the apartment quiet. It wasn’t the first time she’d woken up alone in Yelena’s bed, but it still stung. She fumbled at the side table before remembering her phone hadn’t even made it to the bedroom. Groaning, she rubbed her eyes and rolled off the bed, padding to the living room naked. Heading for the coffee table, she was surprised to find her phone wasn’t there. Turning back, she scanned the room, finally spotting it on the dining table where Yelena had dropped her knives the night before. There was a note sitting on top. ‘Therapy. Love you.’ It was unsigned, but still made her smile. Getting to say and hear those words every day felt like a gift. Kate idly traced the letters before setting it aside to pick up her phone. It was mid-afternoon; they hadn’t gone to sleep until dawn. She needed to to go work, still trying to find a solution to her Kingpin problem.
Heading back to the bedroom she eyed Yelena’s packed closet carefully. She really didn’t want to have to put back on the same clothes she’d worn the day before, but most of Yelena’s stuff wouldn’t fit her. Wondering what Yelena had done with all the clothes Kate had been leaving there before she took off after Kingpin, she crossed to the dresser and started pulling open drawers. When she reached the drawer that had been 'hers' before, it seemed untouched. Yelena had insisted on everything having a place and being organized, so all of Kate’s underwear, sweatpants, shirts were folded, socks matched and put together. Turning to the closet, she went all the way to the end and found 'her' section, including the pants Yelena had insisted on hanging, along with a hoodie. There was one missing, though - her favorite purple one. She flipped through the rest of the closet, trying to find it. She checked the floor of the closet and under the bed. Making a loop through the rest of the apartment she couldn’t find it anywhere. It wasn’t until she walked into the bedroom again that she saw there was a purple sleeve poking out from underneath Yelena’s pillow.
Trying not to cry at the sweetness of Yelena, Kate returned to the task of finding clean clothes. Once she was dressed she pulled one of Yelena’s few extra-large military surplus jackets out of the closet and slipped it on. Before she pulled on her shoes she left her own note for Yelena. She wasn’t really sure when they’d get to see each other again, but somehow, that didn’t matter. Sure, she wanted to be with Yelena all the time, preferably naked, sweat-soaked, and pinned underneath her, but for the first time it felt like they had time; time to figure things out, time to do their own things, time to grow. Leaving her own note on the table - hoping Yelena would be okay with her leaving - Kate headed out.
The long ride into Manhattan gave her time to think about things. The conclusions of the night before felt too easy almost, but every time she’d tried to talk to Yelena since Thanksgiving had left them both all twisted up. She wasn’t sure if that meant they were talking too much or not enough. They both wanted to clear the air, but was it helping them to move on?
When she walked into the crew’s headquarters Yelena and Maria were standing outside of Maria’s office chatting. Unable to tear her gaze away, Kate’s foot caught on Lopez’s chair as she went past, sending her tumbling. Just barely keeping herself from wiping out completely by grabbing the next desk, she jumped back to her feet, blushing. When she looked up, Yelena was smirking. Maria’s eyes narrowed as she looked back and forth between them. Kate tried to school her features to nonchalance while Yelena glared at Maria’s narrowed eyes. Maria turned back to her office, hooking her arm through Yelena’s. Yelena jerked back and nearly fell as Maria called for Kate to follow.
Once in the office, Maria gestured for Kate to take a seat next to Yelena, whose expression now looked as though she’d been sent to the principal’s office. Maria closed the door and walked over to lean on her desk. “What’s happening here?” she asked rather innocently, gesturing between the other two women.
Kate tried to keep her face frozen, knowing that Yelena would want to be the one to handle whatever was happening. Maria was her family, after all. “None of your business,” mumbled Yelena.
Maria raised an eyebrow. “Excuse-” A knock cut her off. “Come in!”
Natasha sauntered in, and Kate sank slowly lower in her seat. She wasn’t sure where Yelena was with their relationship, but she knew she couldn’t lie, and if Maria suspected something was up, then Natasha surely would too. “What’s up?” Natasha asked as she walked around Maria’s desk and dropped into her chair. She glanced at Yelena, then Kate, who felt herself twitch. Natasha leaned forward. Kate wanted to look at her girlfriend, but stayed frozen. “Wait… did something happen?” She glanced up at Maria, then zeroed on Kate yet again. Kate’s skin crawled. She’d certainly been faced with the scrutiny of a black widow before, the knowledge that the person across from her could destroy her in every way… but it had never been the Black Widow, and Natasha was examining her as though searching for every weakness.
“Stop,” said Yelena, standing and stepping in front of Kate.
“Ha!” yelled Natasha.
“I knew it,” said Maria.
Kate shifted so she could rest her forehead on Yelena’s back, bringing her arms around the widow’s waist. “Awww,” came the chorus from Maria and Natasha and Kate found herself grateful that Yelena was taking the brunt of it.
“Are you done?” snapped Yelena.
There was a pause. “No,” said Maria.
“Definitely not,” added Natasha.
“What happened?”
“Are you back together?”
“Was it the poker game?”
“Or teaching her to drive?”
Kate started to shake with silent laughter. She had never expected the Black Widow and Commander Hill to be this ridiculous, but they were acting like gossipy teenagers. Yelena twisted in her grip, crouching to bring her face level with Kate’s. “Are you okay, милая?” She scanned Kate’s face, brow furrowed.
“I’m fine,” she said quietly, still aware of their audience. Yelena scanned her face again. “I’m okay, really.” Yelena stood and started to turn back, but Kate pulled her down and into her lap. She let out an undignified ‘oof’, and Natasha cackled.
“So what happened?” asked Natasha.
“We talked, we are together,” said Yelena.
“This wouldn’t have anything to do with that mission in Philadelphia a few weeks ago, would it?” asked Maria.
“What would make you ask that?” asked Kate, trying to sound confident.
“We’re spies,” said Natasha with an eye roll.
“You came back and Yelena couldn’t look at you. She almost walked into a door last week in her efforts to avoid your eyes.”
“Ha!” exclaimed Kate. “I told you so.”
“So what happened?” pushed Natasha.
Yelena slid off Kate’s lap and pulled her to her feet. “Come, we are leaving.”
But by the time they got to the door Natasha was leaning against it, arms crossed. “Uh-uh. Spill.”
“Сука. You are not as young as you once were. Do you really think you could beat me?”
Natasha surveyed the pair carefully. Kate still couldn’t see Yelena’s face, but could tell she was uncomfortable, her spine rigid. Natasha must’ve seen something similar, because she stepped aside. Yelena’s hand was on the door knob when Maria cleared her throat. “We’ve very happy for both of you.” Kate turned back. Maria was still standing next to her desk, looking earnestly at both of them. “I hope that you both know we’re always here for you. Both of you. We love you.”
Kate squeezed Yelena’s hand, trying to get her to pause. They turned to face each other. She still hadn’t found a solution for Kingpin, and now that she and Yelena were on the same page, she wanted to talk to the crew and see if they could work something out together. It felt like she’d waited forever. It was rare to get the four of them together at the same time, and she didn’t want to miss out on an opportunity… but if Yelena was uncomfortable, she would leave. Even though Yelena was extremely adept at reading Kate’s emotions, she couldn’t read Kate’s mind; they needed somewhere to talk. Kate glanced back at Maria. “I actually- there’s something I need to discuss with you, Commander Hill. Both of you. Can you give me 10 minutes?” Maria nodded, serious in the face of her title.
Kate pulled Yelena out of the headquarters and to the public bathroom down the hall. When the door swung shut behind them she turned to face Yelena. “Are you okay?”
“Yes.”
“Are you sure? Because I don’t want you to be uncomfortable and if they’re bothering you-”
“My family is not your responsibility,” said Yelena with a smile. “Are you my knight in - what is it you say? - glittery armor?”
Kate laughed. “Shining armor. And, yes, if that’s what you want - or need.” Yelena stepped closer, and Kate breathed her in. “How was therapy?”
“Fine. She wants us to make sure we’re on the same page,” said Yelena, coming even closer.
“I want that, too,” whispered Kate.
“You’re wearing my jacket.” Yelena glanced down, gaze lingering on Kate’s lips.
“I missed you.”
“I’m sorry I had to go-”
“Don’t-” Kate cut herself off by leaning down to kiss Yelena.
When they finally made it back to Maria’s office it had definitely been more than 10 minutes. Natasha was sitting in one of the visitor’s chairs with her feet up on the corner of the desk while Maria worked. She cackled again and Kate leveled her a look. “Look. Do you know how hard it was to get her back here? I need to discuss Kingpin, and I need us all to act like adults. Can you do that?”
Maria’s eyes snapped up, surprised at Kate’s tone, but Natasha’s smirk remained. “But do adults really-” she started, eyeing their slightly disheveled clothes.
Yelena stiffened, stepping in front of Kate again. “Stop,” said Kate, trying to tug her back unsuccessfully. “Can you both just act like grown-ups?” She stepped around Yelena and dropped into the seat next to Natasha. “I have leverage on Kingpin.”
Natasha’s boots hit the floor as she straightened up. Maria finished what she was working on and turned to Kate. Yelena moved into Kate’s sight and leaned against the wall. Kate took a deep breath, and Yelena nodded.
Trying to keep it simple, Kate gave them the information she had on Kingpin, leaving out her conversations with both Daredevil and Yelena. When she was done, Yelena was silent. She could feel Natasha watching her. Maria was the first to speak. “What do you want us to do with this information?”
“That’s just it! Nothing! There is nothing I can fucking do.” Kate jumped back to her feet to pace the small space. “Anything I do with it would make me no better than Kingpin.” Trying to bite back the urge to ramble or wallow, she instead choked on her words. It all came back to Eleanor. It always came back to Eleanor. But she was Hawkeye and she needed to get her shit together.
“Don’t do that,” said Maria quietly. Kate straightened, trying to gather herself and figure out what Maria was protesting. “Kate.” Her eyes snapped to Maria’s. “Remember when I told you nothing would take away the pain?” Kate nodded, remembering their conversation soon after her mother’s death. “Don’t fight it. This is how we got here.” She stood up and started making her way around the desk towards Kate. Kate straightened, but Maria just pulled her into a hug. She froze in surprise, unsure what to even do with her hands. Maria pulled back before she could figure it out. What the fuck had just happened? Yelena was smiling, and when Kate shot her a questioning look she snorted. Maria sat back down. “Okay, so we have leverage on Kingpin. Anything else?”
Yelena inclined her head, giving Kate a look that she assumed meant ‘keep going.’ “I’ve been working with Daredevil. He’s been trying to bring down Kingpin for a decade, he said.”
Maria’s eyebrows went up. “Daredevil? The vigilante?” Kate nodded. “Hmm. Do you think he’d be interested in working with us?”
Kate shrugged as her hopes soared. That’s what she’d been hoping for. “I can set up a meeting.” Maria nodded. Kate pulled out her phone and sent a text to Daredevil, hoping to get it taken care of as soon as possible. When she looked back up the other three women were clearly having a silent conversation. She braced herself for whatever was coming next.
“Kate…” started Maria. She paused and glanced at Yelena.
“Милая,” said Yelena.
“Just say it,” said Kate, wanting to rip off the proverbial bandage.
“We might not be able to bring Kingpin down at all,” said Maria.
“And if we can, it could be years,” added Maria.
It was what Daredevil had said all over again. “When we choose the Avengers, we choose to let all the resentments and avenging fall by the wayside,” said Natasha with a wry laugh. “Kingpin is… a relatively minor threat-” bile rose in Kate’s throat and Natasha paused. Kate tried to fight back tears. That ‘relatively minor threat’ had killed her mother.
“Kate,” said Yelena quietly. Kate’s eyes darted to her girlfriend, who was still leaning against the wall, watching her with soft eyes.
“You didn’t deserve this,” said Maria. “You didn’t deserve for your parents to die like this. It's okay to be sick, it’s okay to be mad, it’s okay to be sad. But you have to let yourself feel it. Or it will consume you. Yelena- we- we almost lost you once…”
“Kate,” said Natasha, pausing until Kate turned to face her. They were close together and Kate suspected Natasha could read everything in her heart. “You’re not going to get to kill him. You might never see him imprisoned. We can watch him, we can wait, but he might never face justice. And you will never, ever get to pay him back for what he did to your family.”
Kate broke. The grief she’d been holding at bay since she found out Eleanor had been murdered flooded through her and suddenly she was gasping for air, drowning in tears. Natasha pulled her into a tight hug. A few seconds later Yelena was hugging her from behind, wrapping her arms around them both. They let her cry, let the tears and snot soak her shirt and Natasha’s, never resorting to faux-comfort or empty-promises.
As the tears petered out someone passed her tissues. She tried to wipe away some of the snot and tears, but the sisters’ grip on her made it difficult. “I…” her voice cracked and her throat hurt. Yelena pulled back slightly, giving Kate space, but still keeping a hand on Kate’s back. Kate leaned away from Natasha and tried to focus. Maria knelt next to them, box of tissues in her hand. Finally finding her voice, she apologized.
“No, Kate, we are a family,” said Yelena. “This is how that works, no?”
Kate looked at the three women surrounding her. It seemed unreal. She felt like she’d never have a family again, and now there were people picking her up - just like Clint and his family had after she’d been injured - and offering to be a family unlike she’d ever had. She started to crumple again, and Yelena pulled her to her feet and into a crushing hug.
“I am sorry милая. I did not mean- we are not trying to replace…”
Kate shook her head, cutting Yelena off. Yelena waited patiently as Kate tried to find the words to explain how grateful she was. “I don’t deserve this,” is what finally came out, and Yelena’s face hardened instantly at the words. Protests came from all directions. Kate thought about all she’d put them through. She remembered Maria chasing her through a train station, and imagined what Yelena would’ve seen when she found Kate injured. “I…”
“No-” interrupted Yelena.
“You’re wrong,” said Natasha.
“We have, what? 30 years? Of combined therapy between us,” said Maria. “Let us give you the shortcut we didn’t get. You do deserve a family, Kate. And we’d always love to have you as part of the Hill-Belova-Barton clan. For as long as you want.”
Tired of crying, Kate just laughed and said, “Aww… does the crew know how soft you three are?”
Maria’s face hardened. Natasha hid a smile behind her hand. Yelena’s eyes narrowed. Kate couldn’t help the giggle that escaped.
“Nobody would believe you,” said Natasha, threateningly. Kate laughed again, grateful for the teasing. It made her a little bit closer to letting them all in.
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Kate heard back from Daredevil while the sisters were busy teasing her and they set something up for that night, meeting in a back alley in Manhattan just before midnight. He appeared from the shadows before them, almost like an apparition, and Kate jumped while Yelena laughed.
“I see you found your home again, Kate,” he said by way of greeting.
Even in the dim light Yelena could see Kate’s blush. “Is okay, he already told me,” said Yelena.
“You’ve- you’ve met?” asked Kate.
“Yes, he was the only reason I found you that night. If he had not known…” Yelena trailed off, clearly caught in her memories.
“I take it you won’t be going anywhere without a partner anytime soon, then?” he asked, looking between them.
“I hope not,” muttered Yelena.
Kate laughed. “No. But I’m glad you two agree that I need a babysitter.”
“I did not-”
“I don’t think-”
“Kidding,” said Kate, cutting them both off. “I’m here to discuss the Avengers plans for Kingpin.”
“Do you always speak for the Avengers?” asked Daredevil.
Kate glanced at Yelena. Yelena sure as hell didn’t want to speak for the Avengers. She shrugged. “Maybe? I do for this, at least. Any chance you’d be interested in joining us?”
“Joining you?”
“Yes. Can I interest you in becoming an Avenger?”
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When the end came it wasn’t with fanfare. Instead Yelena was pinned down, the widow’s arm across her throat, her vision already past swimming as she scrambled for a vial of the antidote. The widow’s body was too close, and her fingers slipped on the vial as she tried to pull it free, her ribs protesting.