tony as darcy's older brother
“Stark!”
Tony winced as Darcy’s voice echoed through his workshop. “I knew I shouldn’t have given her the override codes,” he said to DUM-E. The robot nodded sagely, but as soon as Darcy rounded the corner, he chirped a happy greeting. “Traitor,” he muttered. “Get back over here and hold this.” He spun around in his chair and plastered a smile on his face. “Lewis, so good to see you.”
“I can’t believe you,” she said, waving her finger at him. “The fucking audacity!”
He arched his eyebrows. “I’m sure I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
She set her jaw and glared. “Bullshit. You scared him off.”
Tony spread his hands to the side. “I am not a scary person. Now Fury, Natasha, those are scary people. I am warm and cuddly.”
“What the fuck was so wrong with Seth? He’d fucking traumatized by whatever you said to him, Tony,” she said. “He’s going into therapy. Something you should look into.”
“Lewis... Darcy.” Tony took a breath and rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I never had a little sister. Not that I’d wish my parents on anyone else, but... I didn’t want to see you get hurt. And Seth, well,” he shrugged, “Seth was a douchebag.”
She glared at him for another minute, then sighed. “Yeah, he kinda was a douchebag,” she conceded. “But you’re not allowed to give the shovel talk to any of my dates, ever, EVER again, understand?”
Tony grinned. “I’ll be on my best behavior.”
Darcy rolled her eyes. “I’ll believe that when I see it.”