Day 1 - Holding Hands
You couldn't always win.
You just couldn't. Tommy was of the belief that, ninety percent of the time, he lost, regardless of the situation -- He just couldn't seem to get a proper foothold in the world. It was particularly frustrating for him, since he always had good footing in a more literal sense. He just couldn't seem to find his metaphorical balance, and it was...defeating. Frustrating. Infuriating. Any of the above.
Right now, though, it was definitely infuriating.
When he was upset, he went running. It was just what he did. So, he took off, ran for hours, weaving between cars and buildings and trees and darting across the ocean. He ran without a destination, without a purpose, trying to figure out where exactly he was trying to go. He couldn't figure it out on his own, so he resolved to let his feet decide for him.
When he finally slid to a stop, he was...surprised, and then a little mad at himself, deliberately turning his back on the scene. What the hell? Why would he end up here, in front of this stupid spaceship, rather than somewhere a little more... Well, shit, he didn't actually know what he was looking for, so it was hard to be mad at himself, but he could be angry with himself if he wanted to be, dammit, so he was going to be. He scowled, trying to decide what the next step was, because he definitely did not want to just walk up to the ship and knock on it and talk to--
"Tommy?"
He tensed, his shoulders bunching up a little, and then turned around, his expression still sour. Well, that solved the problem of him having to knock, at least.
"What?" He asked, trying to sound as nonchalantly annoyed as possible, but even he could recognize the sharp, tense tone of his voice. Noh-Varr just quirked an eyebrow at him, in the stupidly elegant way he did damn near everything, and somehow it only frustrated him more. He crossed his arms, as if Noh-Varr was imposing on his time, which, in a way, he was. He was busy trying to figure out what in the hell he was trying to accomplish in this moment, both from running around aimlessly and sitting there steaming in front of the ship.
Noh-Varr watched him for a long moment, and Tommy felt himself heating up under his gaze. He almost felt as though his anger should be infectious, and Noh-Varr's complete immunity to it agitated him. It didn’t take him long to grow fully agitated, nearly boiling under the calm gaze of the Kree in front of him. “What do you want?” he snapped, curling his fists at his sides. Noh-Varr seemed to smirk, and it only drove him crazier.
“...You’re the one that ended up at my ship, Tommy.”
He faltered, realizing that Noh-Varr was entirely correct in that. “...Point, but, how did you even know I was here?” he countered, determined not to lose this little stand-off completely. “I was literally standing here for like fifteen seconds.”
“You set off the proximity sensors on my ship.”
“Ah.” His scowl was still set firmly in place, his mood soured further. Still losing.
“...So what exactly brought you here?”
“Nothing!” Noh-Varr had barely finished asking his question before Tommy snapped back with an answer. He sighed, trying to backtrack a little and not seem so…touchy. “I just… I don’t know. I went for a run and I…ya know.” What was he supposed to say, that he decided to let his feet lead him and he ended up outside of Noh-Varr’s home? That may have been the truth, but there was no way in hell that he was about to say that.
Noh-Varr’s reply was as calm as his demeanor, and Tommy could swear the guy looked amused. “No, I don’t.” Tommy wanted to scream in frustration. He couldn’t just let him off easy here, could he?
“I don’t know! I just sort of…ended up here.” He was frustrated, nearly vibrating with a contained angst that was threatening to burst out of him. Maybe he just needed to blow something up. That could be nice.
Noh-Varr watched him for another long moment before finally budging from his spot, stepping back so that the door was more open. “Well, if you ended up here, would you at least like to come in?”
Tommy paused, his lips pursing in thought. “I…sure, why not?” He gave an almost defeated sigh, and then trudged up to the ship, hopping inside of it and moving towards the cockpit, flopping down to sit in the co-pilot seat. He propped his feet up on the dash, feeling an odd surge of satisfaction when Noh-Varr wrinkled his nose slightly at his lack of manners. He reclined in the seat, crossing his arms behind his head and silently daring the other to tell him to take his feet off the dash, but he received no such direction. Instead, Noh-Varr sat in the pilot’s seat and pulled up the commands, bringing the ship to life.
Tommy sat up slightly, peering at what he was doing. “...Are we going somewhere?”
“Nowhere in particular. When I’m upset I generally like to just set the ship on cruise and watch what happens.”
Tommy relaxed back into the chair, suddenly feeling a little less belligerent. He huffed a small sigh, but otherwise kept quiet, watching as they rose into the sky, the ship silent but almost humming with a sort of contained energy. It was barely noticeable, but, relaxing the way that he was, it was almost like a sort of pleasant background noise that helped calm his raw nerves. As they started to rise higher, he took a deep breath, closing his eyes and moving his arms so that they were loosely crossed over his chest instead, allowing himself to relax a little. It was nice to fly away like this, to leave the problems of the world below him, where, in his opinion, they rightfully belonged.
“...So, are you going to tell me what’s wrong?” Tommy cracked an eye open, a brow raising to signify his displeasure. In doing so, however, he realized from his peripherals that they were leaving Earth’s atmosphere, and the sight was enough to make him open both eyes and turn his gaze forward, slightly entranced by the odd beauty of it.
“...It’s nothing.”
“Apparently.” Tommy heaved a sigh at Noh’s response. Of course the stupid alien couldn’t just leave well enough alone. He rolled his eyes dramatically, working his jaw lightly as he mulled over whether or not he actually wanted to humor him with a reply.
He let out another long exhale before answering. “...Let’s just say that my parents and I still don’t get along well, after, what, four years?” He refused to look at Noh-Varr after speaking, not wanting to see that stupid look that Noh always gave him when he spoke about his personal life, as if it were some uncharted territory waiting to be explored.
He didn’t receive a reply after a few moments, though, and so he finally spared a glance towards Noh-Varr, surprised to find the other looking out the windshield as well, though his calm demeanor was nothing close to unexpected. He pressed his lips together and turned his gaze forward once more, scowling a bit. They sat in silence for a few long moments, and Tommy felt his irritation begin to ebb away once more. He felt himself start to relax again, the irritation from admitting his problem seeping away into a familiar calm that came with cruising amongst the stars.
Almost as if on cue, Noh-Varr spoke up again. “...And? What happened?”
Tommy faltered, unprepared to take on the question now that he wasn’t agitated, and ready to pop off with some sarcastic and likely rude remark. He fumbled for words for a moment, but decided to keep quiet, inhaling deeply. He let the peaceful environment they had built envelop him for a few moments longer before he worked up an answer.
“I just…” He paused, his eyes downcast as he searched for the words, feeling oddly vulnerable as he tried to explain the reason for his previous angst. “I talked to my mom,” he admitted, his voice quieter than he would have liked for it to have been. “It…didn’t go well.”
This time, there was no extended pause before Noh-Varr answered. “What did she say?”
He took a deep breath, swallowing thickly. “She, uh… She told me I belonged in prison, and uh…” He lifted a hand to push through his hair and then wipe down his face, propping his chin in it after so that he was shielding a little bit of his face from Noh. “I was telling her, like, the stuff that they were…doing, there. She… She, uh…”
Noh-Varr remained quiet as he struggled for words, keeping his gaze on him, though it was soft. Tommy pushed his hand through his hair again, agitated at the mere thought of what she had said. “She told me...that she signed off for ‘experimental surgeries’ so that they could try and get rid of my mutant gene.”
He couldn’t sit still. He shifted, letting his hand dangle off the armrest, and leaned the opposite way in the seat, lifting his feet from the dash and then sitting up a little more, only to slump down and press his face into his other hand. He felt nearly ashamed, admitting as much. Hell, who wouldn’t? He didn’t even know if his mom hated mutants; he was pretty sure she just hated him. There had just been this small, stupidly hopeful part of him that thought that, just maybe, if he reached out to her after no contact for years, she would have responded with something a little less…spiteful. He didn’t feel like going into details about what she said during their conversation, because he was pretty sure that if he did, he would just end up wanting to blow something up again.
Noh-Varr didn’t respond, which didn’t surprise him. What did you say to something like that? Hell, he certainly didn’t know. He hadn’t been able to reply, himself. He just started running. He had felt so overwhelmed with nerves, so incredibly anxious and angry and upset, he hadn’t known what to do with himself. If he were honest with himself, the only reason he felt the need to make something explode was to try and alleviate the feeling that he was going to do just that if he didn’t find some sort of outlet, and yet, upon boarding the ship, he had managed to find peace. He honestly wasn’t even sure why he had decided to tell Noh-Varr in the first place; he certainly hadn’t intended to tell anyone, let alone some stupid half-roach alien boy he’d been spending all of his time with recently.
He covered his eyes with his hand, not wanting to look at Noh-Varr after admitting what had happened between him and his mother. “I mean, how fucked up is that, right?” he croaked out, clearing his throat and not budging from his position.
He felt something touch his free hand, and he almost flinched away, but soon he realized that Noh-Varr was twining their fingers together, obviously attempting to give him some sort of comfort. He allowed him to, though he kept his own hand limp -- that is, he did until he felt Noh give him a reassuring squeeze. He slowly wrapped his fingers to curl against the hand of the larger man, shifting so that the hand covering his eyes was covering his mouth instead, if only to keep him from spouting off anything he shouldn’t, and glanced at the stars outside once more.
He felt like he lost in most aspects of his life, but this time, at least, it was made a little easier to bear.