Divinity

Camila woke up naturally and gradually, although she refused to open her eyes to try to go back to sleep and be able to rest a little more; however, when she wanted to make another position, she could notice that her head was not resting on a pillow, but no something firmer; but no less comfortable.

Opening her eyes, Camila was surprised to learn that she was lying on Lilith’s shoulder and panic quickly set in. She concentrated on analyzing her situation better; one of her hands rested on Lilith’s chest, which kept rising and falling steadily and slowly, and Lilith’s right hand was on hers; she also felt Lilith’s left arm pass under her and embrace her around the waist, keeping her close.

Camila made sure to raise her head slowly to avoid waking Lilith, she looked up and found the calmest expression she had ever seen on her friend’s face, this made her consider going back to her old position and let her sleep on, but she noticed the thin line of sunlight at least five centimeters wide illuminating Lilith’s lips.

Eventually, as the sun got higher in the sky, the line of light would reach Lilith’s eyes and that would wake her up; according to Camila’s calculations, that would happen in a few minutes, maybe ten at the most.

After a few seconds of consideration, Camila decided to risk waking Lilith by moving away from her and closing the window curtains tightly so she could continue sleeping as long as she wanted, so she began the difficult task of slipping out of Lilith’s strong arms.

She first slowly slid her hand from the top of Lilith’s chest downward so as not to lift Lilith’s right hand and be able to free her own left arm; Camila tried not to think about her hand passing in the middle of Lilith’s breasts.

As soon as her left hand was free, Camila grabbed the sleeve of Lilith’s arm that was over her waist and slowly pulled it until she was able to place it on the surface of the mattress behind her.

Camila let out a sigh of relief that she didn’t know she was holding back when she looked back up at Lilith’s face to se that she was still asleep.

With the first part of her plan done, Camila slowly and carefully moved way to the other end of the bed, jumped Lilith’s arm and turned around to get out of bead; however, just as she was about to sit on the edge so she could get up, Lilith let out a low growl, lay down on her left side and reached out her right arm to wrap around Camila’s waist and pull her back to her.

A small cry of surprise escaped Camila’s lips as she felt a hand on her abdomen that pushed her back until her back collied with Lilith’s chest.

“Let’s go back to sleep some more” Lilith murmured against the back of Camila’s neck.

A rush of heat shot up from Camila’s chest up her neck to her cheeks and ears; she was thankful that her face was hidden from Lilith’s view because she was sure her whole face was completely red from the shiver that ran down her spine as she felt Lilith’s breath against her neck and with the husky tone of voice she had from just waking up.

“I was just going to close the curtains tightly to keep out the sunlight” replied Camila after taking a couple of seconds to take a deep breath and try to relax.

Lilith responded with another low growl and putting a little more force into her grip on Camila’s waist, showing that she disagreed with that idea,

Before Camila could decide if it was a good idea to stay where she was or make an excuse for Lilith to let her go, the door to the room suddenly opened.

“Look what I found” said Mary with an enthusiastic tone.

Camila feels Lilith let go of her and she breaks aways from her almost instantly to sit on the bed.

Turning around so she could look at the other two women in the room, Camila sees Mary still standing by the door holding a travel bag in one of her hands.

“For God’s sake, Mary, knock before you come in” Lilith complains as she shakes her hands in an attempt to make the claws on her fingertips contract again. “You can’t wake someone up like that”

“They were already awake before I came in, I heard them talking” Mary pointed out. “So put your claws aways, Catwoman”

“Morning to you too, Mary” says Camila to avoid the potential fight that could develop between her friends. “What is that?” she asked confused when she saw the travel bag again.

“Oh, right” Mary answered as she followed Camila’s gaze over what she was holding in her hand. “I was hungry, there was nothing in the kitchen, so I decided to check the van and besides the protein bar in questionable condition that was under one of the seats, I fond this in the trunk”

“What’s inside?” Lilith questioned, looking uninterested.

“Clothes” Mary announced with a victorious smile. “Apparently we stole the van from a man who was visiting town, so at least we can take a shower and put on some clean clothes”

“Finding food would have been better at this point”

“I can get food for all of them” commented Camila.

“You’re an angel” said Mary relieved. “I’ll go shower and change in the meantime” she added before leaving the room without bothering to close the door again.

Lilith took a couple of seconds to observe her hands, the claws had already retracted, but she still looked a little uneasy; she turned to look at Camila and just when it seemed she had found something to say, a small cry escaped her lips as she brought her hands to her head.

Camila closed the distance between them quickly and placer her hands on Lilith’s face without knowing what to do to help her.

“Lilith? What’s wrong?” Camila asked worriedly, letting out a fearful tone in her voice. “Lilith, please talk to me”

Lilith’s hand stopped exerting force on the sides of her head and the rest of her body also seemed to relax as her breathing began to regulate again.

“Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse” Lilith muttered to herself.

“Hey, look at me” Camila pleaded, gently pushing Lilith’s face so that she looked up. “Are you okay?”

Lilith took a second to respond, she simply looked into Camila’s eyes as she seemed to be thinking about something, this made Camila feel a little nervous.

“Yes, I think I’m all right now” Lilith sighed still looking a little lost.

“What was that?”

“I don’t know yet”

“Is it still getting worse?”

“Just a little” Lilith replied, her voice wavering even before Camila looked at her disapprovingly at the obvious attempt to lie to her. “I can take it”

“I know, but I wish I could help you”

“You’re already helping me”

Camila didn’t know what she was referring to, not until Lilith placed her hand over one of Camila’s that still held her face firmly.

With Lilith’s gaze on hers, Camila didn’t know how to respond or if she should say anything in the first place; it was hard to think clearly about anything when Lilith was looking at her with her piercing dark eyes like that, especially having her as close as she was at that moment.

Lilith seemed to realized something a couple of seconds later because her eyes widened a little more at her own surprise and she let go of Camila’s hand begore quickly walking away.

Camila tried to suppress se slight feeling of disappointment at the loss of physical contact and, even in the midst of her daze, she wasn’t sure if she actually heard Lilith mumble an apology very softly or if she just imagined it.

Deciding to ignore everything that just happened in the last few seconds and what possible didn’t happen, Camila flashed the most convenient smile she could manage and looked at Lilith.

“Go back to sleep, try to get some more rest, maybe it will help”

“I doubt it will work”

“You don’t lose anything by trying”

Camila could see Lilith’s intention to argue as she looked at an unspecified point in the room, but when she turned to look at her, her expression softened a bit and she ended up nodding silently before responding verbally.

“I guess I can give it a try…”

Without being able to help it, the smile on Camila’s lips became winder and more honest; after a couple of seconds of looking at each other, not knowing if she should say anything else, she got out of bed, took the phone that was on the bedside table, closed the window curtains tightly and got ready to leave the room.

Just before closing the door, giving Lilith on last glance, Camila could have sworn she was about to say something to her, wanted to, but seemed to forced herself to keep quiet and look away.

Camila walked to the small living room of the house, sat down on one of the sofas and ordered through an app on her phone the only food she could get at that time and in that area,

When her mind found nothing else to keep herself occupied, her thoughts immediately went back to Lilith; it wasn’t something she could avoid, she knew it would eventually come to that point, but Camila hopes she can delay it for longer, at least a couple more days, not when they have to sleep together in the same bed.

Being attracted to women was not new to Camila, she had felt this way before, both for men of women, but she did not finish defining her sexuality until shortly after joining a convent.

Discovering herself as pansexual felt good, liberating to some extent even though she never felt she had hidden from anyone, her own faith had no conflict with that, she didn’t believe she was as abomination or committing any sin unforgivable by God.

In the end, while it was good for herself to accept that part of herself, it didn’t affect Camila’s new found purpose in life, she took her vows after that and was fine with that.

That didn’t mean that she had suddenly become completely blind to the beauty of other people, after all, she was still human and knew how to appreciate the beauty of other in a respectful way.

Camila knew she was surrounded by objectively attractive people and she was fine with that, no one ever made her doubt, not even in the slightest; at least she didn’t until she met Lilith.

It was a little funny the first time Camila thought it through, she thought it had to do with her name and everything connected with her and that Lilith’s natural beauty just didn’t help her to let it go as easily as she always did.

Then everything became more complicated she began to get to know Lilith better, the real person behind the high walls she had built around herself, and just before Camila reached the point of no return something happened.

She still wasn’t sure exactly what happened, but one day Lilith put up her walls like never before and did everything she could to keep anyone away; that version of Lilith was the one she interacted with the longest before she was considered dead.

Despite Beatrice, Mary and Shannon’s attempts to find out what was wrong with Lilith and try to help her, none were successful and everything went into a tailspin after Shannon’s death and Ava’s appearance as the new Halo bearer.

Camila was completely unaware of that last version of Lilith before her supposed death, she didn’t know who she was, she wasn’t the person she had originally known; however, the version of Lilith after returning from hell was more like what she remembered and that was making it almost impossible for Camila not to start falling again when she thought she was over it.

“Are you all right?” Beatrice questioned with concern.

The sudden interruption took Camila by surprise, even managed to startle her and make her jump a little.

“Yes, everything’s fine, I’m still a little tired” Camila answered while showing a small smile that she hoped would look natural and not as fake as her answer.

“I understand you” Beatrice declared before returning her smile and taking a seat next to her on the sofa, “It will take us more than one night to fully recover, especially Mary”

The bathroom door opened just then, as if Mary had waited for her name to be called before coming out.

“I didn’t expect this place to have hot water” Mary commented, walking over to another of the sofas.

“Where did you get those clothes?” Beatrice asked confused.

“I found a travel bag in the trunk of the van”

“That’s good, it will help us go unnoticed”

“You can be next” suggested Camila.

“Really?”

“Of course, you were in the catacombs, you need a shower more than I do”

“She’s right” said Mary.

“Thanks, Cam” Beatrice replied taking Camila’s hands and giving it a little squeeze before getting up from the couch.

Hearing the little nickname made Camila remember the night before, when they were in the middle of the confrontation with the possessed and Lilith called her by the same name, even though she had never called her that before.

The way Lilith had looked at her and the tone in which she had spoked to her on that occasion was also different, only she hadn’t been thinking about that at the time, she was too preoccupied with keeping Lilith from getting close to Adriel to pay too much attention to that.

“What is your brilliant little brain thinking now?” Mary interrupted.

Camila gave a little jump in place and looked at her friend as if she had caught her doing something she shouldn’t have.

“I was just thinking about…” Camila was silent in the middle of the sentence because she didn’t know what to answer and didn’t think to admit to Mary who se was really thinking about. “What will we do now?”

“We’ll stay hidden, contact Mother Superior and put together a plan with the information she gets from the Vatican”

“How bad do you think it is?”

“Well, I bet Duretti has a public relations nightmare after we blew up part of the Vatican catacombs and let something out of its cage that was definitely not an angel”

Camila was silent for a couple of seconds as she looked down at her hands in her lap. Going over in her mind the last thing that happened at the Vatican before they had to flee. “Do you think Ava is right?” he murmured without looking up. “Is he a demon?”

“I’m not sure, probably…” Mary answered, dropping her head on the back of the sofa. “We should have listened to Lilith”

“What do you mean?” Camila questioned, finally looking up.

“Lilith said Ava shouldn’t go into the tomb”

“Why?”

“I don’t know, she seemed disoriented, she didn’t seem to be thinking clearly, that’s why we didn’t think she was right” Mary ran a hand over her face in frustration. “But we were wrong, we should have listened to her”

“Don’t worry, we’ll figure it out”

“I hope so, because we are responsible for Adriel getting out”

[…]

Camila was next to take a well-deserved shower, the hot water didn’t help much with the muscle pain in most of her body, but getting the dirt off her made her feel a little better.

The clothes in the bag belonged to a man with a slim build, that made it easier to find something she could wear.

After choosing shorts that were originally meant to be below knee length, but for Camila were even longer, and a Hawaiian shirt that she was sure Mary and Beatrice had avoided at all costs; Camila left the bathroom and went straight to the room she had shared with Lilith.

Opening the door, Camila found Lilith in almost the same position she had left her in before leaving the room.

“Breakfast hasn’t arrived yet, but the shower is free if you want to take it” Camila informed, trying to decipher the expression on Lilith’s face in the partial darkness of the place.

Lilith didn’t fully react until she heard Camila’s voice, as if before that, even when she saw her enter the room, she couldn’t let go of one of the thoughts in her mind.

Lilith’s response was not verbal, she merely nodded slightly with a small smile on her lips before standing up and walking towards the door.

Camila was about to let it go, it wasn’t unusual for Lilith to be quiet and distant, but now things felt different, their relationship had changed in certain ways and she couldn’t help but worry, so she placed her hand on Lilith’s chest as she was about to weigh next to her under the door frame.

The expression on Lilith’s face went from somewhat neutral to confusion as she saw the hand that had stopped her on her chest and then looked up to meet Camila’s gaze in search of an explanation.

It was hard on Camila’s brain when Lilith was looking at her with her intense dark eyes from so close, she went blank for a moment.

Luckily for Camila, Lilith realized why she had stopped her in the first place and showed her a small smile that, despite nor looking entirely sincere, managed to distract Camila even more.

“I’m fine” Lilith affirmed in a not very convincing tone. “I was just thinking”

Camila was sure that was a half truth, she was about to groan until she realized that Lilith’s eight hand was on top of hers, holding it against her chest, this made her even more aware of how close they were to each other.

“Lo siento” Camila murmured as she slipped her hand out of Lilith’s grip.

It took her a second to realize that she had spoken in Spanish, something that only happened from time to time if she was nervous and Camila was sure Lilith knew it, she had missed some Spanish words or phrases when they had little time to know each other, something that also happened to her with Shannon, Mary and Beatrice, and especially with Mother Superior.

The smile on Lilith’s lips widened, confirming to Camila that she knew the reason for the unconscious language change and that caused her cheeks to start feeling hot.

Just as Lilith was about to say something, Mary’s voice from the living room interrupted her.

“The food arrived!”

Camila thought she saw a small hint of disappointment on Lilith’s face, but if so, Lilith was quick to hide it.

“Go get something to eat with them. I’ll take a shower” Lilith said before finally walking past Camila and out of the room.

Camila rested her head on the door frame and sighed with relief that she was out of the situation; she knew she had to be more careful, if Lilith had noticed so easily that she had become nervous, it wouldn’t take her long to figure out the real cause behind it and she didn’t want things between them to become awkward… she didn’t want Lilith to walk away from her.

After a moment’s respite, Camila walked to the kitchen where she found Mary opening a box of donuts with one hand while holding a coffee in the other.

“I’ll wake up Ava” Beatrice declared before walking down the hallway.

“Quick, grab the chocolate donuts before Ava devours them all” said Mary when she saw her.

Camila smiled at the genuine concern on her friend’s face, picked up the phone she had left on the table and sat down next to Mary before taking her advice and grabbing a chocolate donut for herself.

Ava and Beatrice joined them a couple of minutes later; Ava want straight for the donuts as soon as she saw them, while Beatrice took a moment to turn on the living room TV to watch the news about what happened at the Vatican.

“What are you doing, Cam?” Ava questioned as she munched on a donut.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full” Mary scolded.

“Sorry, mom”

Camila smiled without looking up from the phone screen in her hand, she could perfectly imagine Mary’s frown at that moment.

“I’m entering a secure network so I can send a message to Mother Superior” Camila reported.

“Does Mother Superior have a phone?”

“It’s for emergencies only” Beatrice clarified before turning to Camila, “Do you thing it’s safe? Father Vincent knows about it?”

“Don’t worry, I’ll make sure we can’t be traced” Camila replied with a small smile.

“Since when did you become a technological genius?” Ava asked in surprise.

“Mother Superior saw Camila’s potential and sent her to the computer division before joining our team” Mary reported. “She knew she would be a great help in the missions”

“Is there a computer division in the order?”

“We have an armory full of high powered weapons, and you´re surprised we know how to use a computer?”

The conversation was interrupted by a video on television taken from outside the Vatican jist at the moment of the explosion in the catacombs.

“What are they saying?” Ava asked.

“No one from the Vatican has given any statement” said Beatrice without taking ger eyes off the television. “They say there are rumors of a terrorist attack”

Ava’s spirits dropped noticeably when she heard that they were considered the bad guys in the story, the conversation ended and Camila went back to work.

About ten minutes passed when the bathroom door finally opened and Lilith came out to join them in the kitchen.

Camila nearly choked on the last bite of her donut when she saw Lilith wearing a sleeveless sports shirt with her arms flexed as she arranged her wet hair.

It wasn’t the first time she had seen Lilith’s bare arms, they had similar training attire to help them with mobility in combat, but it was the first time Camila had seen Lilith in lees clothing than usual after accepting her growing attraction and possible feelings for her; plus, there was also the detail of the loose, messy hair that made her loke more attractive than Camila could have imagined.

“Any news?” questioned Lilith as she entered the kitchen.

“Camila is about to contact Mother Superior” reported Beatrice. “She might have a clearer picture of the situation at the Vatican”

Mary took the leftover coffee and handed it to Lilith as she passed by her and Camila took the opportunity to give her the last chocolate donut from the nearest box.

Lilith thanked her with a small smile and walked a couple more steps to the kitchen counter to lean her back against it and stand there even though there was more than one free chair at the table.

“How sure are we that Duretti will be on our side once he knows what happened?” Lilith questioned before drinking some coffee. “He could arrest Mother Superior for helping in Adriel’s release”

“Or he could be on Adriel’s side” Mary added.

“So the options are:” Ava interrupted, “that he hates us for freeing Adriel, that he hates us because he’s on Adriel’s side, or that he doesn’t hate us enough and helps us fight Adriel”

“Basically” Beatrice said.

“Two of those three options are not good for us”

“I hope it’s the third options because I just send the message” commented Camila, leaving the phone on the table.

They all focused on the news videos on the TV, except for Ava, she stared at the phone on the table waiting for an answer that did not come as quickly as she expected.

“How long is this going to take?” Ava finally asked after almost two full minutes.

“She could answer right now or it could take a few hours” Beatrice reported.

“It could take a few days” said Mary. “She might not even respond at all; we don’t know what her situation is”

“And what are we going to do in the meantime?” Ava asked with a mixture of concern and worry.

“Wait”

“That’s all we’re going to do? Wait?”

“We can’t do anything else” said Beatrice.

“Even if we found him we couldn’t do anything against him” said Mary. “He already kicked out asses once”

“Language” Beatrice chided. “But Mary’s right, we couldn’t beat him”

“Well, then let’s train to kick his ass” Ava seemed to remember that most of them were in no condition to train, not after the beating they had received less than a day ago. “What do you say, Lilith? You can beat me as many times as you want and I won’t complain… Not too much”

The rest turned their attention to Lilith, keeping silent waiting for her to give an answer to Ava’s proposal.

“No”

Lilith’s answer was terse, in a slightly harsh tone, she didn’t seen upset, but left the donut untouched on the kitchen counter and walked out the front door without another word with the coffee in her hands.

“Strange… she always wants to hit me” Ava mentioned.

Mary and Beatrice exchanged a look that showed a bit of concern for their friend.

“I’ll take care of it” Camila declared before either for them could go after Lilith.

She stood up, picked up the donut on the kitchen counter and headed for the front door; as she left the house, Camila followed Lilith without bothering to quicken her steps to catch up, she was sure Lilith already knew she was following her and the fact that she didn’t stop to tell her to leave her alone was a good sign.

Lilith stops at the top of a small hill and takes a seat on the grassy ground with elbows resting on her knees as she absentmindedly swings the coffee.

Camila walked a little slower as she saw Lilith sit down, giving her the opportunity to ask Lilith to leave her alone if she really wanted to, but not getting even the slightest reaction from Lilith, Camila decided to sit next to her.

“I managed to save it before Ava stole it” commented Camila holding the donut in her hand closer to Lilith.

“I’m not hungry” Lilith muttered without looking away from the landscape in front of them.

“You need to eat”

Lilith finally turned to look at her, she seemed to be about to say something to continue refusing to eat, but when she met Camila’s gaze she decided not to put up any more resistance and ended up taking the donut.

“Happy?” Lilith asked before taking a bite of the chocolate donut.

“Yup” said Camila with a smile before looking ahead and appreciating the scenery. “It’s a beautiful view”

“Very beautiful…”

They were silent for a couple more minutes while Lilith finished eating and drinking some more coffee.

Camila didn’t want to ask Lilith again how she was doing, she had done it before and received a half truth at best, but she still cared and needed to know more than anything else at that moment.

Before Camila could find a way to start a conversation, she heard a small grunt leave Lilith’s lips as her back hit the grass.

Camila moved on instinct, worry taking over and in less than a second she was practically on top of Lilith.

“What’s wrong?” questioned Camila trying to stay calm. “Are you all right?” her left hand went from resting against Lilith’s chest to holding her face, looking for any sing that something was wrong.

“I’m fine, it’s  just a normal headache” Lilith assured with a small smile on her lips, laughing a little at the shorter girl’s reaction. “Maybe I’m thinking too much”

Camila sighed in relief when she heard that answer, her hand slid over Lilith’s cheek and now rested between the taller girl’s shoulder and neck.

“What are you thinking about?” Camila questioned with a hint of insecurity in her voice.

Lilith tore her gaze away from Camila’s and her attention was directed to the sky above them, possibly lone cloud out there.

“All over…”

Camila nodded silently accepting the vague answer because she knew at least she was honest and didn’t want to pressure Lilith to talk more than she felt safe to share.

Lilith decided to close her eyes a few seconds later and Camila almost let out a groan of dissatisfaction as she missed the spectacle was Lilith’s eyes bathed in sunlight from that angle.

They stayed in the same position for a few more minutes, with Camila resting her right forearm on the grass to help her stay partially on Lilith’s body.

Camila knew she wasn’t being subtle at all as she closely observed every minute detail on Lilith’s face, but she allowed herself to do so by making an excuse to herself that after that she would take care of repressing any attraction to Lilith and never see her that way again.

She gave herself permission to admire Lilith’s beauty in a non platonic way one last time.

Camila’s attention was so focused on Lilith that she didn’t even notice someone else approaching them until that someone spoke and nearly gave her a heart attack.

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” Mary declared a huge smirk on her face that she could hardly contained even if she had tried, “but Mother Superior has already responded”

Camila was glad to hear the news, it even made her forget about the growing blush on her cheeks and helped her concentrate solely on taking Lilith’s hand and getting then both to their feet before returning to the house with Mary.