Chapter 6
Cinnamon.
I smiled. PJ's flat always smelled so nice, and I swear, every week had a new scent. I guess this week it was cinnamon.
It was strange, I thought, considering I had been here so many times but never once saw Phil. Although it does make sense. He himself said that him and Chris had grown apart. But still, shouldn't I have at least heard about him?
And now that I think about it, Chris and Peej had brought up some guy named Phil in conversation once; I never did know the name of the guy at the ceremony. So, yeah, it makes sense that I wouldn't have connected the two.
While we were deciding shower schedules, I, being the ever-so-kind person I was, volunteered to shower last, which was a bad decision on my part. In the time it took for everyone else to shower (and no, Chris did not shower with PJ), the pink paint in my hair took it's time to dry.
So when I had gotten out of the shower, despite how many times I washed and shampooed and scrubbed my head raw, there were vibrant pink flecks streaking my hair. Chris burst into laughter when I entered the room, and even PJ had a difficult time stifling his. Phil giggled a bit, giving a small apology,
"Alright," PJ announced, clapping his hands together, "so where is everyone planning on sleeping? We've got two rooms only, so I guess it's two to a bed? Or someone could sleep on the couch."
I head been expecting Chris to spill out some weird innuendo about him and PJ, but he was surprisingly quiet,
"Would it be alright if I shared with you? I mean if not, I'll sleep on the couch." I asked Peej,
"Yeah sure, that's fine!"
"I guess that means Phil's with me," Chris smiled, "but don't get too jealous, PJ, you're still my favourite." he winked for like the fifth time today before we all left to go sleep.
It was pretty dark in PJ's room, but I was used to it. Of course this wasn't the first time I'd slept in his bed. We've been friends for years, but it's never been anything more than that,
"Dan?" he whispered. I jumped a bit, thinking he was asleep,
"Yeah?"
"What do you think of Phil?"
I paused. What did I think of him? I mean, of course I thought he was amazing. And really cute. Very cute. But why was Peej asking this now? He knew what I thought of Phil. I mean, I always talked about the "guy at the ceremony". So much, in fact, I nearly got a slap in the face because I wouldn't shut up about him,
"He's alright."
PJ smiled,
"Alright, Dan? Come on. You must be freaking out! I mean I knew you were sharing with one of Chris's friends ... but when he opened that door.." he laughed, "you should've seen your face."
My eyes widened, "Was it bad?"
PJ only laughed harder,
"So what's it like living with him so far? The lover of your dreams."
I elbowed him,
"Shut up, Peej. It's not like that."
"It totally is! Don't think I didn't catch you giving him heart-eyes earlier today."
I sighed,
"I hardly even know him, PJ. I just think he's really cool is all."
He chuckled,
"Okay." and I practically heard him rolling his eyes.
After another few minutes or so, PJ piped up again. But this time, on a different topic,
"Do you think he means it?" I heard him say, barely a whisper, but it was there,
"Who?"
"Chris."
I turned my head so I could see Peej. He was lying flat on his back, staring up at the ceiling. The faint light in the room was just enough to outline his features, delicate as they were,
"Means what?" I asked softly,
"You know ... all the joking about me and him. Do you think there's apart of him that wants that?"
I thought for a moment, before replying,
"Is there apart of you that wants that?"
He let out a long breath,
"I don't know. I don't know, Dan. And it's so frustrating because," he brought his hands up to his face, the palms of them digging into his eyelids, "because I love him. But I don't know if I love him as a friend, or like properly love him, or if all his joking his just getting to my head-" he emitted a short growl,
"I - just," PJ sighed, "I'm sorry, just go back to sleep."
And with not know what to say, I did.
The morning came earlier than expected, the white light burning from the outside of my eyelids. I groaned, rolling onto my stomach and bringing the duvet with me. I was prepared to stay there all day.
That was until the smokey smell of bacon wafted into the room, putting on my senses on high alert.
There was food! There was food.
And fuck, was I hungry.
I reluctantly pulled the covers off, hissing at the cold air that immediately overwhelmed my body. I shuffled into the kitchen, stretching my arms over my head,
"'Mornin' sleeping beauty. Rest well?" Chris asked, shoving a mouthful of pancake into his mouth,
"Yeah. You?"
"'Twas hard to. This one," he stated, jabbing his fork in Phil's direction, "tends to snore."
"It's not my fault!" he said, his voice going about ten octaves higher, "I can't control what I do when I sleep."
I pulled a chair out from under the table, cringing at the screech that echoed through the kitchen when I did so. I sat in it and fixed myself a plate of bacon and pancakes,
"Where's PJ?" I asked,
"Went to the shop." Chris replied, popping the 'p'.
"Oh." I replied.
He nodded, picking up his bowl and putting it in the sink before darting off to his room,
"What's up with him?" I asked Phil, biting into a piece of bacon.
Phil just shrugged. A click followed by a creak directed our attention to a very flustered PJ entering the flat. He slammed a bag on the counter and ran a hand through his hair,
"Dan," he huffed, "I need to talk to you."
"What." I murmured, my mouth stuffed with food. He let out an exasperated sigh and trudged over to me, grabbing me by the forearm and yanking my body up,
"Now."
I whimpered, PJ's grip pulling me to his room. He shut the door behind him and turned to me. I hastily swallowed the food I had been eating before he interrupted and opened my mouth to speak,
"PJ? Is something wrong-"
And once again, I was interrupted.
PJ shoved me up against the wall and pressed his lips to mine in a bruising kiss. My eyes grew wide and I squirmed under him before finally being able to push him off. I gave myself a few seconds to catch my breath,
"Um, what!?" I gasped at him, still breathing heavily, "What the hell was that!?"
He gaped at me, and I realized that this probably was not the reaction he had been expecting.
I stared at him, my eyes wide with confusion,
"So... all that stuff you were telling me about Chris last night? Was that just bullshit?"
"Huh?" he said, out of breath.
"You said you loved Chris! And now you're in here.. rubbing your lips all over my face."
"I-" PJ gripped at his hair and stared at the floor, "I thought about it.. while I was out. I only love Chris as a friend. I thought what I was feeling was for him but-"
He looked up,
"Shit, Dan. I'm in love with you."
I pressed my lips together and shook my head, storming out of PJ's room, and out of his flat, and out of the building. Nobody protested.
PJ was crazy. He wasn't in love with me. He's just confused.
A thought crossed my mind, that PJ might just be feeling like he's losing me. He's always been incredibly protective over me, especially since what had happened with my mom.. he was the person who was there for me when no one else was, mostly because there wasn't anyone else. PJ was my only friend, and now that I'm moving away from him and in with someone else (especially the person who I've been fawning over for years) he could just be afraid that I'm going to replace him. So, he's acting out on his feelings...
Or, he really is in love with me.
It was while I was wandering the streets of Manchester did I realize how incredibly stupid I was.
My phone was left at Chris and PJ's flat, I was still in my sleepwear, and I had no idea where I was.
Not to mention, my hair was pink.