Chapter 5
"You said you'd try," Loki accused softly.
"Right. 'Try,'" Tony said, irritated. "Look, she came back to get a few boxes. I needed closure,"
Loki laughed darkly, running his hands through his hair. "So you fucked her. In our bed..." He was hurt beyond words. He'd known better than to trust Stark with his heart. Better to have it happen now, after a few months, than years down the road; though he doubted the pain would be any greater the more involved he got. "I've gotta go," he said, through a choked sob.
"Where?"
Loki shook his head. "Doesn't matter,"
Tony put a hand firmly on his shoulder. "Yes, it does!" he said, voice breaking.
"To whom?"
"To me," Tony whispered, breaking down. "Loki, I...I love you. I know I did a shitty thing, the worst thing a person can do to someone else. I betrayed your trust, I knew you were scared and instead of having the balls to tell you how fucking terrified I was, too, I ran. I turned around and did the one thing I knew would fuck everything up. I'm a fucking disaster, but if you don't take anything else out of this mess, please...know that I love you. Please," he whispered plaintively.
Loki had stopped when Tony began speaking but hadn't turned around. His shoulders were shaking as he quietly sobbed, trying to absorb everything that had happened. He still couldn't get her scent on the sheets out of his mind. It was almost as if Tony had wanted..."You wanted me to find out, didn't you," It wasn't a question. Loki was the most intelligent being Tony had met. The god turned around, eyes filled with tears, reflecting the pain he clearly felt. "Why?"
Tony hung his head in shame and felt his own tears spill over. "I'm scared. I wanted to see if you'd leave. I was right to be scared. You're leaving,"
"That's not fair, Tony. You can't intentionally hurt me, knowing full well how terrified I am, as well, then accuse me of leaving. It's just not fair,"
Tony looked at him, lower lip trembling, for what felt like forever to Loki. "Then please stay. I'm sorry," the billionaire pleaded, dropping to his knees. "Please. I'm so, so sorry, Loki. I love you. Please. Give me another chance. I swear to you that I'll never hurt you again. Please. I swear on your mother's grave,"
Loki's head jerked at the mention of Frigga. Tony knew how sensitive he was about her. She was his one and only truly soft spot. "If you ever do anything like that to me again, Anthony Stark, I promise you that I will turn and leave, even if it kills me to do so,"
Tony nodded as he sobbed and held his arms out. Loki enveloped him in a warm hug and they clung to one another as they wept. "I'm so sorry, Loki, I'm so, sorry,"
"I know," Loki crooned soothingly. "It's OK, we don't have to talk about it anymore. But can we please get our own bed?"
Tony sniffled as he said, "JARVIS, get someone to deliver a new bed. I want it here and set up in an hour,"
"Yes, sir," the AI replied as Tony still clung to Loki.
"I love you, Loki. I really do,"
"I know, Anthony," Loki said simply. "I love you, too,"