chapter nineteen
Chapter Nineteen
.
You wasted no time in finding Ronal and Tonowari once you had completed your gifts. You dressed in your favorite clothes, a simple top with shells, and the matching loincloth. You took your hair out of it’s braids, letting it fall in its natural curls. Tsonu’e watched you with an amused smile, offering you a wave as you finally darted off with your gifts.
It was early, the passing of the eclipse casting an orange cast over the ocean.
You found Tonowari first. He was speaking fairly intensely with some of the younger warriors, a hard look on his face. You held back a little, your ears pinned back as you tried to look casual. His gift was safe in your satchel, and you found yourself pulling at a loose threat on the bag, digging your toes in the sand while you waited for him to finish.
His eyes fell on you while one of the warriors was speaking, and something shifted enough in his gaze that the younger Na’vi trailed off, turning to see what he was looking at. You shrunk a little under their gaze, even as Tonowari approached you.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” you said. “You can finish your conversation. It can wait.”
“I am glad you came,” he said. “The conversation was not one I was enjoying.”
“Oh?” you asked casually, mostly to put off giving him the necklace. You’d missed him too, and it was nice to see him. Talk with him. Tonowari was insightful, tactical. You enjoyed hearing his thoughts.
He exhaled slowly. “The Sky People have killed another tulkun. No one we know, but it is clear they have no intention of stopping.”
Your heart sunk. “Oh,” you whispered.
His hand came to your shoulder. “It is not something to concern yourself with,” he said.
“No,” you said, disagreeing. “I know them better then most. If you need anything, all you need to do is ask. I’m not… a warrior. But I know them.”
“Thank you,” he said sincerely. “We will protect them. What happened to Äa—we will not let this happen again.”
“I trust you,” you told him. Before you could lose your nerve, you shoved your hand into your bag. “I made you something.”
Carefully, you pulled out the bundle with the necklace. You’d wrapped it carefully that morning, determined not to tangle any of it. “I finished it last night,” you said. “I wanted to give it to you then, but eclipse had already passed.”
“You may come to me anytime,” he said, taking the package. He opened it carefully, his mouth dropping a little as he saw it. “These are akula teeth.”
“Yes,” you said, smiling slightly. “You are olo’eyktan. It seemed fitting that you would wear the teeth of such a dangerous creature.”
“You made this, for me?” he clarified.
You buried your foot a little further into the sand, and told him shyly, “I wanted you and Ronal to know, that, I’m still interested.” your tail curled a little, your ears flicking and you continued, “As long as you are too. I mean.”
“Hana,” said Tonowari. You looked up, locking eyes with him. “I have known few things to be true in my life. I know the passing of night into day. I know my duty to my people, and I know Ronal.”
You swallowed, bracing yourself for rejection. He tucked your hair behind your ear. “The other is you.”
Oh.
Oh.
“Oh,” you said, feeling relieved. “That makes me very happy.”
“Tonight,” he said suddenly. “Will you meet me?”
“Yes,” you said. “Of course.”
He nodded, pleased. Before you left, he said, “When you find Ronal, bring her too.”
You beamed at him, your eyes crinkled and your teeth showing. You darted forward, grabbing his hand to stop him from turning away. You stood on your tippy toes, tugging on his arm to make him lean down a little as you kissed his cheek quickly.
“Tonight,” you promised, stepping back, ready to find Ronal and extend the invitation.
“Tonight.”
.
Ronal had barely stepped out of her marui when you found her.
“Ronal,” you greeted gently.
“It is early,” she noted, not unkindly.
“Yes,” you agreed. You reached into your bag, not wanting to waste any time. “Here.”
“What is this?” she asked curiously, unwrapping the package to reveal the headband.
“It’s for your hair,” you explained quietly. “You said it kept falling in your eyes, and I know you don’t like to wear braids very much.”
Her face softened, something affable settling over her face.
You went on before she could speak. “I made Tonowari a necklace, a nicer one then last time. I wanted to let you know that I am still interested. That is, if you are too.”
“Yes,” she breathed.
You looked down timidly. “Tonight, Tonowari is meeting me over there,” you pointed to a spot on the horizon. “Ikni ultxarun taw’tskxe.”
Where the mountain meets the moon. The translation wasn’t perfect, but the sentiment was there. The spot where Polyphemus intersected with the mountains, so close one might be able to touch it.
“Will you come?” you asked her.
“Yes,” she said.
.
With the Metkayina, when you looked for love, you saw it everywhere. You saw it in Tonowari, in the way he wordlessly helped others with their chores—they way children in Awa’atlu never knew anything but warmth, how they were loved and scolded by anyone. You saw it in how Ronal slipped the children treats, her face never cracking. You saw it now, as Tonowari grabbed Tsonu’e’s basket in his arms and assisted her in carrying it.
You felt something in your chest, in the very depths of your soul. You loved him, in a thousand, tiny, unspoken ways. You felt profoundly connected to him, in a way you were terrified you would never experience again.
The tenderness you felt toward him was raw and unfamiliar, so different from the love you felt for Ronal, but no less powerful, no less intense. You loved him the way only a child could love, foolish and maybe a little selfish, but never lacking in intensity or earnestness. Beside you, Ronal’s eyes sparkled, her smile crinkled her eyes as she laughed. Abruptly, every love song you’d ever heard was about her.
You were twitchy and nervous, even as Ronal wore your gift to her, the shell resting against her forehead. She was sitting beside you, carefully preparing a salve of some kind.
Tonight, you and her would meet with Tonowari. You weren’t certain what you expected to happen, if you were expecting anything to happen at this point—but you were happy to be with her, in her space. Ronal sought you out shortly before your morning meal. She had tentatively offered you a paste for your tattoo, gently scolding you for having gotten it wet while it was still so fresh.
Honestly, it was fine—but you liked having her fawn over you a little, so you accepted the salve bashfully, offering a quiet thanks.
You must have looked at her for a little too long, because her eyes met yours.
“What?” she asked quietly.
“I don’t know,” you said, looking away. What you wanted to say, was that she was beautiful.
.
You fiddled with your hair, your clothes, until it was time to leave. You wore the earrings Ronal had gifted you, and were careful to slip away before anyone could see.
You arrived first, your stomach rolling with nerves as you paced nervously. Your heart nearly leapt out of your chest when you heard Ronal approaching. She was beautiful, and your heart kept racing as you took in the sight of her.
“You look beautiful,” you said, finally voicing the words you felt too shy to say earlier.
She smiled. “You do too.”
She kissed you, her lips soft and tangy. You wanted to consume her, to crawl inside of her and taste her. You pulled back, feeling something bubble inside of you—something intense, something raw.
“I want a simple life with you, I want to eat berries and raise babies with you. I want to hold your hand and tell you I love you every morning and every night,” you confessed to her. Ronal inhaled shakily.
“I think about you,” she said. “You and Tonowari. I have picked out the names of our children already.”
You kissed her again, tangling your fingers in her hair. Heat looked in your stomach, your tswin tingled, and you felt hot, feverish as her hands wrapped around your waist and pulled you close.
That was how Tonowari found you, your legs entangled as you kissed each other deeply. His approached broke you apart, and it was Ronal who said, “I will not live a life without either of you.”
“Okay,” he said, taking her offered hand. You smiled softly at his look to you.
“I chose long ago,” you admitted. “I choose you, I choose Ronal.”
You had learned, in the moments you had stolen with them, that Tonowari was bolder in was that Ronal usually wasn’t. Where she remained more reserved, Tonowari was more passionate. It did not surprise you when he kissed her and you in quick succession, grabbing his queue and bringing it around quickly.
Ronal looked at him, her eyes a little apprehensive, even as you copied his movements a little slower. She looked between you both, her pupils blown and eyes wide.
“I am not certain,” she began slowly, and your heart sunk. “How I fit.”
You laughed, relieved. You grabbed her hand, dropping your tswin. “I will show you,” you promised.
She smiled back, lips parting slightly as you gently grabbed her queue and yours. You moved closer to Tonowari, looking at him for permission. He stared back, his gaze hooded.
You made the bond.
The connection was intense, and you’d never experienced a three way connection before. You felt Tonowari’s heart, Ronal’s, your own. Your breaths evened out, syncing together. Ronal lifted her hand shakily, placing a hand on your cheek, on Tonowari’s.
It was difficult to tell where you began and they ended. In some ways, it was like your bond with Ame—but in other ways, nothing like it. It was intense, spiritual in the same way your bond with Ame was, but something more intense in other ways.
You were Ronal, and she was you. You were Tonowari in the same way he was you and her. Your sense of self was lost. You were you, but, in many other ways, you were one being in three bodies—come together at last.
The love you felt for them; the burn, it quickly ignited into a flame. Tonowari was everywhere, his hands, his lips, his fingers. You removed Ronal’s top, feeling her breathing as if it were your own, the touch of your hands as if it was her touching you. The love she carried for you both overwhelmed you. Tonowari’s hands were in your hair, her hair. You gasped, your heart racing as Ronal’s warm hand cupped your breasts, squeezing them gently.
You wanted them.
It went very quickly. You had never been with two people at once, but this, this was never awkward. You kissed Ronal, burying your fingers inside of her as she cried into your mouth. Tonowari worked his way inside of you, turning your head away from Ronal as he pulled her into a kiss, clutching her to you both. You were sandwiched between them, Ronal riding your fingers desperately.
“Let me see your eyes,” Tonowari managed. You forced yourself to look over your shoulder at him, locking your eyes together as he buried himself inside of you completely. He pushed further, his fingers digging into your side as he rocked you up and down, smushing a withering Ronal against you.
You whimpered.
You felt him shudder, from yourself, and from his. He grunted, the feel of you around him overwhelming, the feel of Ronal’s touch, her soft skin, the clenching of your body.
Ronal came first, curling her toes as she pressed as close to your as possible, Tonowari’s fingers on her clit. She cried, a breathy moan escaping her as you followed quickly, right behind Tonowari.
You stayed there for a while, catching your breath. Tonowari and Ronal cradled against you. You felt warm, content as your hearts slowed. You deranged yourselves slowly, Tonowari’s cum dropping down your leg as you stood. You broke the bond gently, shuddering slightly. Ronal laid down beside a heavily breathing Tonowari—resting her head on his chest as she closed her eyes. You watched them for a moment, feeling peaceful.
Tonowari looked at you, his eyes hooded, desire in his gaze. He held out an arm, and you accepted the offer, laying down beside him, resting your head on his chest. Ronal’s fingers found yours, gently threading them together. You looked at her; at him, and said simply, “I see you.”
You had never felt so exposed before. So known.
“I see you,” said Tonowari quietly, looking at you and Ronal softly, affectionately.
Ronal smiled. “I see you, my loves.”
.