Kanade adjusted her position in her chair, preparing to send over the file of the latest song. She didn't show it, but she couldn't contain her excitement- This latest song seemed to be the best of them all by far.
She has near perfected the use of guitar and other string instruments in her song, which made the song move much smoother. The percussion was on-point, and she set up such a entrancing melody- it could put almost anyone to sleep. She also added a few heavier parts, like the weight on one's shoulders growing as the song progresses, yet the melody repeats as to convince themself that everything will be fine. And nearing the end, everything goes quiet, as if to show how nothing was alright in the end and they've trapped themselves at the depths of despair with no one to look for them. Yet, a soft melody will still play, which symbolizes the hope for their life to grow and get better.
And Kanade is ecstatic that she gets to share this with her group members; her confidence is peaking. She might even reach the heart of Yuki with this song. She decides to test her theories and answer her questions by playing the song for all of them.
But for some reason, as the song goes on, she felt a bit more.. uneasy.
And then the song came to an end.
"So.. What do you guys think of this?" Kanade asks. "I've tried my hardest to bring out the emotions within the song, but I want to know what you guys think so I can make more proper revisions-"
"Pfft! You call this your hardest?" Amia cut her off unexpectedly. "To be honest, K, I expected more from you!" She laughed at her mockingly. "I bet Enanan could make a song better than that, and yet she's the group's artist!"
"You're making that sound like a bad thing, Mizuki! It's not bad to be an artist!" Enanan argued. "Though.. It is bad to be like you, Kanade. It's like you've downgraded.. I don't think I've heard something so horrible from you in years..!" Kanade could make out some sort of weird laugh from Amia's side, as the two spouted even more insults at her work.
"What did you even see in this that made you think it was your best, anyway?!" Enanan almost shouted from the other side of the screen, she probably woke her brother with that type of noise.
Kanade was lost in confusion. Have I really gotten that worse? She asked herself. She almost didn't want to believe it, but then again, even the two members that spouted the most praise to her work on the daily had agreed that this song was awful.. But if that's the case, then she can't even imagine what Yuki has to say. She's almost afraid to speak up, But she has to know.
"..Yuki?" She calls out, trying to ignore the mockery and laughter of the two other members. "Please, be honest: What do you think of the new song..?"
"...It's not that bad, is it?" She says quieter, she subconsciously hides her face behind the microphone.
Suddenly, the laughter went quiet, as if all attention was drawn on the two. It made Kanade feel even worse than before, which Kanade didn't even think was possible at first. Finally, Kanade could see the muted icon disappear from Yuki's spot on her screen as she spoke up.
"Oh, K..." Yuki said, her voice was sweet like honey. It was that voice that made her stomach crowd with butterflies at that moment, even if she was about to face either rejection or acceptance: rejection being most likely.
"...It seems you can't save me after all."
Kanade's eyes widened in shock. Out of all the words of rejection Kanade was expecting to hear, that phrase wasn't one of them. "..I can't?" Kanade asked, her voice cracking as her throat tightened. "Surely I can make another song! One that can help all of you--"
"But it won't be enough." Yuki finishes her sentence, which leaves Kanade even more dumbstruck. "None of the songs you made has truly reached me, they've only gotten worse by the day. Now, I can confirm this for sure:"
"You aren't enough."
And then the laughter came back up again, mixing in with even more words as the song replayed itself in the background. Kanade could feel the burning sensation from her throat spread to her eyes, but when she tried to reach over to mute her microphone, her arms were shaking. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't mute herself, and she gave up.
Her sobs could hardly be heard underneath the noise that echoed throughout her headset. Her tears burned against her skin and dropped to the carpet and her chest got heavy. The noises only got louder, and Kanade wanted to throw off the headset and leave her life behind right then and there.
"No way- Is the 'legendary K' actually crying tears of shame right now?" Mizuki asked in a mocking tone. "How embarrassing!~"
The voice ringed in her ears and kept mocking her as she closed her eyes and hid her face between her legs. She just wanted it all to be over.
"You aren't enough."
She could hear Yuki say inbetween the madness, which only made Kanade's tears flow even more. She could barely move her arms or legs, so she held herself tightly in her chair and squeezed her eyes shut as she could feel the darkness all around her..
"You aren't enough."
"Huh. Seems K fell asleep with her mic on." Mizuki stated.
Right now, everyone was working on preparations for the newest song. Kanade said that she was close to finishing it up and that she needed a few more minutes of concentration, something that the other members were willing to provide while also working alongside each other. Everything seemed to be operating smoothly, which they were all thankful for.
However, it seems that Kanade has worked herself a bit too hard and she's fallen asleep with her microphone on. "It happens to the best of us." Enanan adds on. "One time, I accidentally slept with K on mic, and she had to hear my dumb brother- Wait, that's irrelevant!"
"Oh, come on!" Mizuki nags. "I wanna know what happened!"
"Nope, not this time!" Ena says. "I have to wrap it up for now, anyway." Mafuyu could hear the cluttering of items from Ena's side of the screen. "We'll see each other next time at 25:00, correct?"
"Yes." Mafuyu says. "Take care, Ena."
She saw Ena's icon disappear as the artist disconnected from the voice call and went offline. "Yeah.. Sorry Yuki, I've gotta head out as well.." Mizuki said sheepishly. "I'll see you and K later, okay? Bye now!"
"Bye." Mafuyu responds as Mizuki's icon disappears next, they followed Ena out of the voice chat. It seemed that it would just be Yuki and a sleeping K within the voice chat now.
And while Mafuyu could leave the call as well and everything would be fine, she does want to wait for Kanade to wake up so that the two can get a proper goodbye and K sleep properly once she's gone. Not only that, but Mafuyu gets a certain warm feeling from being alone with K, and even just being in the voice call alone is no exception to this. So, something about hearing a soft snore or two from K's side of the screen makes Mafuyu's stomach clench with this weird feeling she can't yet describe. Kanade tends to have a lot of ways to make Mafuyu feel many emotions. It's a good thing about her, in Mafuyu's opinion.
Mafuyu's brow furrows as she listens closer to K, however. It seems she's started mumbling in her sleep, and she doesn't seem to be going through something pleasant.
"Have I really gotten.. that worse..?" She could hear the soft voice from her monitor, and from there she also heard her shaky breathing.. had she always been breathing like that?
Mafuyu had finished listening when K started sniffling, she could almost hear a sob.
"K.." Mafuyu tried to call for the composer. "K, wake up. Please." No matter how much calling Mafuyu did, it didn't change the fact that she was still asleep and crying. Mafuyu didn't want to leave Kanade like this anymore, but if she couldn't reach her by the voice chat..
..She hopes that her mother doesn't notice her absence.
As she steps out of her window with her phone in tow, she scrounges her brain to try and remember the route to Kanade's home- something that her phone wouldn't provide for her. It shouldn't be too far from cram school or the academy, correct? She thought as she climbed down from the household's roof. "Perhaps it's north from there. I've seen a neighborhood around there. The style of the homes seem familiar to Kanade's home I saw that day." She didn't feel much, but she did feel a bit 'lucky' to have some form of memory when it came down to important details like these. If not, she probably would've been lost a long time ago.
Sooner or later, Mafuyu arrives at the Yoisaki household's doorstep. Instead of bothering to knock, she gently pushes on the door.. it's unlocked.
Kanade has to be careful. Mafuyu thinks to herself, locking the door behind her as she stepped into the home. As much as she'd like to inform Kanade on the many things that would be better for her health instead of looming in an empty room and making music, it's not like Mafuyu was any better herself. At least for now, that conversation will have to wait.
When she ensured the door was locked, she immediately bolted for Kanade's room and workplace. She hoped that the composer isn't suffering too badly..
The door swung open with relative ease, yet the slight squeak of the door hinges caused Kanade to flinch within her sleeping position. Her head was bundled in her arms on the table. She let out a small groan, it seems that Mafuyu's entrance had awoken the girl.
Mafuyu spared no time in rushing to Kanade's side, whose face was smeared with tears. From there, she attempted to lift Kanade to her bed.. But that ended up in a slightly painful dragging of Kanade's body to the bedframe, the person in question still attempting to regain her consciousness.
"Mafuyu? What--" She winced a bit as her hair caught on something and pulled on her scalp, causing Mafuyu to stop dead in her tracks.
"Sorry about that." Mafuyu said calmly, approaching the source of pain and delay and detangling Kanade's hair from it. Once freed, the long-haired girl stood up from her position on the floor.
"..What are you doing in my home, Mafuyu? Aren't you supposed to be with your parents?-"
"Don't worry about that, I've got it under control." Mafuyu said, before taking Kanade's hand over to the bed. "From what I can tell, I assumed you needed comfort. Thus, I came to support you."
Kanade's eyes glistened a bit, shining even more after they had been wet with tears. "..You left your own home and family to come here and.. comfort me?" Kanade felt warm, especially after once being surrounded by the cold of a nightmare.
Mafuyu dragged Kanade into the bed, following her into it after. "Yes. Now, It'd be preferrable if you didn't cry like that from your dreams this time." Mafuyu said, inching a bit closer in the bed and intertwining the fingers of the two. "You wouldn't mind if I got close like this?"
Kanade could only feel a overwhelming warmth as she softly nodded her head, snuggling it into Mafuyu's shoulder without warning. Mafuyu jumped by the action, but didn't object.
Mafuyu felt so many emotions once again, emotions that would usually keep her up at night. These emotions would race straight to Mafuyu's heart and pull at it's strings, animating it once again and making her feel more alive. This mainly occured whenever Kanade was present.
It hardly felt real for Mafuyu, for a strange reason. While Mafuyu had her fair share of surreal reality experiences, one of the things she wouldn't imagine reality to bring to her would be these feelings that rushed in with the warmth of Kanade's heart. She was so close to her, too. She could hear her heart's soft beating, and Kanade had relaxed into her. She could feel Kanade's breath on her neck, which slowly dragged Mafuyu into a slumber.
If it weren't for the immense fatigue settling in from the travel she had to do to get here, Mafuyu would've stayed up longer to frolick within these feelings. She wanted to know why such feelings gather and occur. For example, why her heart hurts and stings everytime Kanade creates another song for her, or sacrfices herself for her. Or even, why one of her signature soft smiles brings a heat wave to Asahina's face and causes these emotions to throw her for another loop.
She wonders if Kanade knows why these feelings occur. After all, she is the one who vowed to help her discover more about her feelings, and these emotions that have been pulling at her heart aren't excused.
But a wonder like that would have to wait for tomorrow, when the sleepy composer is well-rested and ready to compose once again.