Burnt Eggs and Ham

Marvel Cinematic Universe Marvel
G
Burnt Eggs and Ham
author
Summary
Its a widely accepted fan-canon that Bruce is an amazing cook. Here's what happens when there's a universe in which he isn't. One-shot.
Note
I was talking with Camikila, and I realized that it seems like a widely accepted fan head canon that Bruce cooks wonderfully, and loves curry and other spicy middle eastern food. I myself accept this as a head canon, and am writing it into my own series "Nadine's Coffee." I decided to do something a bit different, and mess with this widely accepted fan head canon. Enjoy!

Burnt Eggs and Ham

 

It had been a long time since Bruce had had a kitchen to actually cook in, and while on the run, it was hard to make time to settle somewhere and be able to cook. He'd often times traded work for food, or what little money he recieved for an already cooked meal, or food that didn't need to be cooked. 

Moving into Stark tower with Tony and Pepper had been a challenge. He and Tony often would get involved in projects and word forget to eat. Tony was a master coffee maker, and he could make smoothies, but he didn't cook more than a simple sandwich or a bowl of cereal. 

This became a problem when Pepper decided that Bruce and Tony were eating entirely too much take out and banned Jarvis from letting them order food, but supplied them instead with fresh produce and meat to cook for themselves. So Bruce and Tony tried, and it ended up being a disaster.

Let's just say that it was a good thing that Dum-E was trained on how to use a fire extinguisher. 

Pepper had returned from her meeting to see Tony and Bruce covered in soot, the kitchen covered in white foam, and the two of them sitting on the floor in the corner eating burnt eggs and ham sandwiches while tinkering with a toaster. Pepper assumed they were trying to improve it. Why it needed improving, she didn't know. 

Bruce and Tony were banned from cooking with the stove or anything that wasn't a toaster or coffee maker ever again.