“You’re in my spot.”
Dorcas looks up from her book to see Lily standing in front of her, radiant as ever, annoyed as always. Dorcas smiles brightly. Lily furrows her eyebrows.
“What are you laughing at?” Lily spits out. “You’re in my spot. Again.”
“You know I like this spot. It reminds me of you.” Dorcas says.
“Charming me isn’t going to work, move it!”
“Tough luck, darling.” Dorcas grins. Dorcas doesn’t know what exactly is wrong with her, but she’s absolutely delighted whenever Lily is in a mood like this. She thinks of later tonight and can’t help but smirk. There’s a faint blush spreading on Lily’s cheeks and she’s so breathtakingly beautiful, it’s hard not to stand up in the middle of the library and just snog her senseless.
“You’re really not going to move?” Lily asks indignantly, interrupting Dorcas from her thoughts.
“No, I booked this spot, you see, so I’m studying here.”
“You’re not even studying, you’re just reading a book.” Lily points out dryly.
“Just reading a book? Darling, I’m contributing to my intellectual property.”
Lily looks absolutely done with Dorcas at this point, and Dorcas loves it. Loves her. Lily is glaring at her, and Dorcas can’t get enough of it. Lily is yelling at her, and Dorcas just sits there and smiles.
“You are so frustrating, did you know that?” Lily begins “So bloody annoying, you make me wanna bang my own head against the wall. I don’t know why I put up with you.” Lily is still rambling and starts walking away, and Dorcas is already missing her. Missing this.
“See you tonight?”
“In your dreams, Meadowes!” Lily calls back over her shoulders.
“Fuck you, Evans!” She calls back and puts up her middle finger.
Even in the middle of the library, where everyone around her is studying, Dorcas can’t help but cackle.
-
"I swear to fucking god, this-" Lily doesn't have to look up to know that Alice is cursing while storming towards her table, followed by a exasperated Pandora, trying to calm her down.
Lily chuckles as Alice flings their bag on the table with a loud noise.
"Ah, I see you're having a good day?" Lily raises her eyebrow.
"Please don't ask them about it" Pandora comes in between, "she's absolutely insufferable today."
"I am not!" Alice scoffs.
Lily doesn't have to argue further to know that Alice is indeed insufferable today. She knows better than to get into a fight with them today.
"How are you, Lils?" Pandora continues, before Alice can go on rambling about everyone and everything that is working against her today.
"Oh, you know, the usual."
"Fighting with Dorcas again?"
"Something like that." Lily smirks.
"You know what, I'm not going to ask, I don't even want to know."
Lily smiles because indeed, Pandora does not want to know what that usually means for them.
"Do you two have something romantic planned for today? Since it's valentine's and all?." Lily asks and wiggles her eyebrows in suggestion which results in a sarcastic laugh from Alice.
"Well" Pandora begins "I personally don't believe in Valentine's. What's the point of it? I love Alice every day of the year, I don't need a special day for that. But since I'm such a good girlfriend and can pretend to be a romantic I've agreed to play along and Alice has a surprise for me tonight. Apparently."
Pandora bows over to Lily and whispers in her ears "Don't tell her, I'm actually really excited for it. I can’t wait to be properly wooed."
Lily laughs again and feels a wave of adoration for her friends.
"You think their mood will be better by then?"
“Shush, don’t risk it!” Pandora hisses and puts her hand over Lily’s giggling mouth, who tries to break out of her grasp.
“What about your plans though?” She quickly changes the subject to see that Alice is still mumbling about some professor, and is not paying attention to them.
Lily can’t help but blush.
“I’m uh-” Lily begins, and suddenly she feels nervous to even admit it. “I’m going to make it official tonight. I mean ask her. To be my girlfriend. You know.” She rambles.
Pandora looks visibly amused by this. “Finally, it took you forever! You two are so obviously gone for each other, it’s disgusting really.”
“Says you!”
“Alice and I are perfectly decent.”
“Every time the three of us watch a movie together you two end up snogging, that’s disgusting!” Lily points out.
“Well that’s all Alice’s fault, really.”
“What’s my fault?” They ask distractedly, only looking up when she hears her name.
“Nothing, dear.” Pandora muses back.
“I don’t know though” Lily continues, “I didn’t want to rush things seeing how we…started out. But I can’t wait any longer. I think I’m in love. Like really desperately in love and I want her all the time and I always miss her even when she’s with me. Do you know that feeling? It’s like I’m missing a limb. She makes me want to pull my own hair out and she makes me weak in the knees at the same time. Sometimes I can’t even properly form sentences around her because she gets me so flustered. Me! Flustered! It’s exhausting. I hate love, I hate everything about it!” She grumbles and puts her hands in her head. She hasn’t been able to properly sleep in forever because she’s always thinking of her, her her.
Pandora smiles at Lily fondly. “Lily, that is so lovely! You deserve it, you know. She’s good for you.”
“You think?”
“I know. Of course you are. Who knows you better in this world than I do, hm?”
“That’s true. I just need a plan, how I’ll ask her. I’m pretty sure she has planned to do the same thing, I know her, but I want to do it first.”
“Oh my god” Pandora cackles, “does everything have to be a competition with you two?”
“You know us, Pandora, and yes it is. And I’m going to win this one and then I can rub it in her face for weeks, how I beat her to asking it. She’ll hate that.” Lily grins. Pandora just sighs in exasperation.
“Okay, I’m back, I have processed my thoughts.” Alice suddenly announces. “What are we talking about again?”
“Lily’s soon to be girlfriend.” Pandora teases.
“Oh, she’s so hot.” Alice immediately points out, and Lily cackles. Because yes, she is. She really is.
“Hey!” Pandora calls out, “go back to whining about whatever it is that you're upset about or give me some of your adoration. Not some other girl!" Pandora pouts. "Not when your girl is right in front of you. Manners, Alice, come on."
Alice just laughs fondly and presses a kiss to Pandora’s cheek, and soon all is forgotten. They chat, they laugh, they hug, they’re alive and Lily sits back and absorbs, happy and grateful to experience these moments with them.
-
Lily doesn’t bother knocking anymore, she knows she is expected and she always just walks into the dorm at this point. She looks around the room and sees her soon to be girlfriend hunched over her desk, completely caught up in her studies. Lily sneaks over to her, and hugs her tightly from behind.
“It’s you!” She squeals and turns around to take Lily properly in her arms, “Finally. Been waiting for you.”
Lily looks at Dorcas, takes all of her in, and realises how in love she really is with this girl.
“It’s me.” Lily murmurs as she strokes Dorcas’ hair behind her ears. “It’s always me.”
And then Dorcas surges forward to kiss her, and when their lips connect, Lily forgets about everything. It’s just the two of them in this world, tight in an embrace and kissing each other, because they can now. Because they are fools in love.
Dorcas pulls back and grins. “I’ve been thinking about this all day. About you. Kissing me. It drove me crazy.”
“I know it did.” Lily smiles back. “I know you get all worked up when I act like that. When we fight. I can feel the sexual tension too you know” She points out. “So really, I did that for myself, knowing I’d see you tonight.”
The grin on Dorcas’ face is still so wide it must be hurting her cheeks. But it’s when she sees the look in Dorcas’ eyes, full of adoration and admiration, her eyes glimmering like Lily is the only person in the world she really sees, that Lily decides she’d much rather be asked by Dorcas to be her girlfriend, to let her make it official. Lily can see how much Dorcas wants her, and it’s almost dizzying, and Lily is so full of love for her, that this time, this one time, she’ll let Dorcas have it. Lily doesn’t care. All she wants is to make Dorcas happy. She wants Dorcas. If she has Dorcas, everything else is enough.
Later that night, when it’s been made official, and Lily couldn’t help but whisper ‘I love you’ and Dorcas had smiled so insanely brightly that drove Lily absolutely mad, they’re in bed, and Dorcas is all over her, and Lily can’t get enough so all she can do is kiss Dorcas back, touch her everywhere, desperate to show her how much she cares.How she’s the only one that matters.
When she’s drunk on love and desire, Lily realises. There are worse ways to lose.