Chapter 8
Lydia
2:20
Watching Mateo and Rufus is strange to me. I’ve never seen Mateo look at someone like that. He’s had crushes at school, but none of them lasted more than a week. He’s never been the type to pursue any kind of romantic relationship, so seeing him in one.. Is different. He must really like this guy.
It’s even weirder watching them pretend to not be dating in front of Mateo’s dad who just woke up from a coma. What a fucked up situation!
Though, I’m sure that his dad already knows. The way they look at each other isn’t even the biggest clue that they’re dating. It’s the way their voices change when they’re talking to each other; their voices lose tension. When they talk to each other, it’s like they’ve known each other for years.
It’s not even just that..it’s the way they know exactly what the other is feeling. I suppose almost stepping into the afterlife with someone brings you closer to them. They both know exactly how to comfort each other. They know how to handle situations that the other can’t handle. For example, when Mateo couldn’t speak earlier, Rufus took over the conversation for him. They’re cute together in the saddest way possible.
I’m happy that they found each other, but I can’t even imagine what they were going through. When Christian died, I was devastated. I felt broken beyond repair. I didn’t have to watch him die, though. I can’t imagine having to wait for the person you love to die. I can’t imagine not knowing which one of you was gonna go first. I don’t think I could do that..but they did.
For that reason, there’s an aura of sadness and grief that surrounds the two of them when they’re together. I don’t think they realize it, because at the end of the day, that aura is just the bond that they built yesterday. The rest of us see it. There’s so much about this that I don’t understand.
Maybe I don’t understand it at all.
I don’t want to understand it.
Mateo is happy, and so is Rufus. Rufus and Mateo. Mateo and Rufus.
‘Here lies Mateo Torrez’
‘Rufus Emeterio.’
Would they get graves next to each other?
I shiver at the thought. God damn it, this whole thing is all too poetic. I’m starting to get flashbacks to high school theater class. Before I dropped out, I loved theater. One time, our teacher let us write our very own play. I was stoked. We ended up writing it about a couple during the Civil War. The husband went to war, as most men did, but he kept in touch with his beloved wife back at home. In the play, he got shot in the stomach. With this injury, he still found a way to write one last letter back home.
After performing the play, I kept the script just to have it.
I didn’t look at it again until after Christian died. Flipping through the pages, I found a line that was underlined and highlighted in neon green highlighter. This line was from the very end of the letter.
“We’d love each other till death did us part, for which it did. I’ll still forever love you, my dear. The world is cruel; it pulled us together, then proceeded to tear us apart. Fret not, my love, it’ll put us back together again. I’ll find you.”
Is that how they felt? Torn apart by an outside force?
If that’s how they felt, and my play predicted it, at least it predicted something right.
The world brought them back together.
“Yo? Lydia?” All of the sudden, I snap back into reality to see Rufus, waving his hand in front of my face.
“Shit- sorry! I guess I’m still pretty tired.” I laugh, nervously.
“You okay? You can always go home if you need to.” Mateo says, pulling a water bottle out of his backpack. He tosses it to me. “Here.” God, he’s always so prepared.
“Thanks. I’m good, though. I can stay.”
“If you say so.” Rufus shrugs.