Chapter 2
Ava felt giddy as she twirled the rose around in her hands. She had to contain herself to not downright skip into the living room.
Mary was still in the position she was in when Ava left to open the front door. Hanging on the couch, scrolling on her phone.
“Who was at the door?” Mary asked, only looking up when Ava didn’t reply. She noticed that Ava was focused on something in her hands, but she couldn’t see what it was. “What’s that?”
Ava held up the rose with a huge grin on her face. She walked closer to Mary so she could see it better.
“Where did you get that?”
“Beatrice.”
“She gave you a rose?” Mary asked confused. “Why would sh-… Oh she asked you out?!”
Ava nodded excitedly.
“Damn, okay, I didn’t know Beatrice was such a romantic.” Mary laughed.
“Right? I would be swooning if someone did this for me. You know, for real and not just fake.” Ava explained.
“From where I’m sitting, it kind of looks like you’re already swooning, babygirl.” Mary teased.
“Oh, shut up, you’re just jealous.”
“Yes, I’m definitely jealous.” Mary said sarcastically. “I’ve been dating and living with the love of my life for years, but I’m jealous that you got a rose from our friend.”
“Okay, well.” Ava tried to think of a rebuttal. “When’s the last time you got flowers?”
“Last week.”
Shit, Ava was out of ideas. She said the only thing she could think of.
“Your mom!” She yelled and sprinted to her room.
“I’m telling her you said that!”
“Nooo!!”
“Admit your defeat!”
“Leave me alone!”
Ava made it to the top of the stairs when the sound of Mary’s booming laughter reached her. She slammed her bedroom door for dramatic effect, but not so hard she would do actual damage.
Once safely in the comfort of her room, she checked to see if she her rose hadn’t been harmed in her frantic escape from Mary. It seemed to look fine, and she smiled again.
She had told Camila she wanted to be wooed when she was drunk, but she thought she had been joking at the time. Maybe she had wanted to feel loved more than she realized.
It was no secret that Ava went on a lot of dates and didn’t mind some casual hookups here and there, but it had been a long time since anyone had made her feel wanted. It had been rare for anyone to make it to a third date.
For a while, she had been content like this and she loved the meeting new people part. But eventually it had started weighing on her. She saw the people around her in happy, loving relationships, ready to settle down and realized that maybe this was what she wanted in life as well.
Obviously, she knew that Beatrice had only asked her out this way for educational purposes and such. And maybe because Camila had told her that Ava would like it.
It felt bittersweet to know that she was helping Beatrice find love when she wasn’t even sure if she could find it for herself. But that’s what friends were for, right?
During her contemplating, her soft smile had turned a little sad. When she noticed this, she shook her head to try and physically rid herself of her melancholy.
She had just received a beautiful flower from someone she cared a lot about and it was a nice gesture, no matter the cause. It should be honored accordingly.
Ava loved flowers.
She found beauty in the complexity of all the colors and lines of the rose, yet also in the simplicity of a single flower.
She liked bouquets as well, but they could overwhelm her and the beauty of the details would often get lost in the masses.
She found a small vase for the rose and set in on her nightstand. She admired it for a moment longer, before taking a picture of and posting it on her story.
---
Beatrice texted Camila as soon as she came home.
Beatrice – I did it
Camila – Wait is the rose yours?!!
Beatrice – How do you know about the rose?
Camila – Check her insta
Beatrice was confused as she opened the app to do as Camila said. Ava’s story was the first to show on the top of her screen. When she clicked on it, she was met with a picture of the rose she gave Ava.
The single flower was placed in an elegant small vase and the colors matched well with the woodsy vibe of the background. Beatrice had to admit it was a very aesthetically pleasing picture.
She was a little surprised that Ava would post it, but she didn’t mind. She felt a little flattered even. She swiped up to reply to the story.
bea.young – So I take it you like it?
Beatrice opened her texts to Camila again.
Beatrice – I didn’t expect her to post it
Beatrice – But yes, after I left the office, I bought the rose and went to her place. When she opened the door, I gave her the rose and asked if she wanted to go on a date with me
Camila – Damn Bea, I didn’t know you were such a romantic
Beatrice – You don’t think it’s too much?
Camila – I think it’s just enough Bea :))
avasilva_ – I love it
Beatrice’s heart skipped a beat when she read Ava’s message. She had been a little scared that Ava would feel like she was overstepping. She repeated her question to Ava.
bea.young – It’s not too much?
avasilva_ – It’s perfect
avasilva_ – Your future girlfriend will be a lucky girl ;)
Beatrice let out a nervous laugh. It felt a little weird to be reading that.
---
Not too long after posting the rose, Ava’s phone buzzed with notifications of her friends.
Camila was the first to reply to her story. The girl seemed to have some kind of sixth sense, or maybe she just had her post notifications on, either was equally likely.
camilaleon – Damn bitch?!!?!
camilaleon – You reallymanifestedthis!!
Ava was confused for a moment until she realized Camila was referring to her drunkenly telling her she wanted to be wooed.
avasilva_ – You mean when I told you in confidence and you told everyone 2 minutes later???
camilaleon – …. I can’t read suddenly I don’t know
avasilva_ – Yeah I’m sure hahahaha
Soon after, she received another notification, this time from Beatrice. They texted back and forth a little. She felt a little wistful thinking about what an incredible partner Beatrice would one day make. She just wished she could find someone as good as her friend for herself someday.
She felt herself slip away into the melancholy again, but she wasn’t going to let that happen. She decided to take charge of the situation.
bea.young – That’s really nice of you to say
avasilva_ – So when are you taking me out? ;)
Maybe it was a little too forward, but she needed to feel something other than this gloominess.
bea.young – I was thinking
bea.young – Would tomorrow be too soon?
bea.young – I just want to get it over with asap
Ouch.
That had the exact opposite effect.
She shouldn’t have relied on this so much.
Weird how the same thing that made her so happy half an hour ago, kind of crushed her now.
avasilva_ – Oh yeah sure
bea.young – I was thinking about going out for coffee, if that’s okay with you?
avasilva_ – That’s fine
bea.young – Would you prefer in the morning or the afternoon?
bea.young – Dumb question, I know you don’t like to wake up before noon on Sundays haha
avasilva_ – Either is okay
God, why did she feel so dejected all of a sudden. It didn’t make any sense.
She hated this rollercoaster of emotions.
Maybe a nice shower would wash away these stupid feelings she was having. Nothing like a good crying session in the shower, right?
She grabbed some clean clothes and left to the bathroom. She put her phone on ‘do not disturb’ and queued up some sad songs. She turned on the shower and connected her phone to her speaker.
Ava stepped under the water and flinched when she felt how hot it was. It was near scalding and she was sure her whole skin would be irritated and red later, but she couldn’t care less at the moment.
She alternated between standing motionless under the shower, letting her emotions take over and singing along to the painful lyrics of the music.
She knew that Mary was still downstairs and didn’t want to alarm her to her current emotional state, so she couldn’t scream out the lyrics the way she wanted. Her whisper shouting was still extremely cathartic, though.
By the time her playlist ended and she emerged from the shower, she felt infinitely better. She had just needed to get it out of her system.
She put on her comfy sweatpants, oversized sweater and fuzzy socks she had picked out earlier.
When she looked into the mirror, she noticed that her skin looked fiery red like she had predicted. At least it meant that it wasn’t obvious she had been crying.
She grabbed her phone and turned off ‘do not disturb’. She walked out of the bathroom and towards the stairs, maybe she could convince Mary to watch a movie with her. She just hoped the girl wouldn’t think anything of it.
She checked her notifications on her way down and saw that she had a few missed calls and texts from Beatrice. The first few messages had a few minutes in between before they followed in rapid succession.
bea.young – Are you okay, Ava? You sound different
bea.young – Did I say something wrong?
bea.young – Oh shit
bea.young – Is it the ASAP thing?
bea.young – I didn’t mean it like that
bea.young – I swear I only meant that if I wait too long, I’ll start overthinking and stressing out
bea.young – I didn’t mean that I wanted to get it over with bc I don’t want to go or anything
bea.young – Bc I do want to, it just makes me so nervous
bea.young – Ava pls reply or pick up
bea.young – Okay, I’m coming over, we need to talk
Ava looked up from her phone when she walked into the living room. She saw Mary and Beatrice sitting at the table, they weren’t talking, and Ava couldn’t describe the silence as comfortable.
Beatrice was sitting on the edge of her chair, all tensed up. When they made eye-contact, Ava could see the regretful and anxious expression on her face.
Ava tried to smile at her, but she knew it didn’t reach her eyes.
Mary looked a little puzzled between the two of them, but she didn’t say anything.
Ava nodded her head towards the stairs, quietly signaling Beatrice to follow her to her room.
Neither of them said anything until Beatrice closed the door behind them.
“Ava, I’m so sorry if I-.” Beatrice started to apologize.
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Beatrice.” Ava interrupted, sighing.
“I’m still sorry.” Beatrice tried again.
“Please don’t apologize.” Ava could feel the tears forming again behind her eyes. Apparently, she wasn’t as cried out as she thought.
Beatrice looked at her for a moment, trying to read her.
“Can I give you a hug?” She offered.
Ava was a little taken aback. Beatrice didn’t usually initiate physical contact.
“Do you want to give me a hug?” Ava checked.
When Beatrice nodded, Ava nodded as well. The taller girl stepped closer and wrapped her arms around her.
“I always want to comfort you when you’re hurting Ava. Especially when I’m the cause.”
Ava buried her face in Beatrice’s shoulder and circled her arms around her waist, melting into the embrace.
“I already told you, you didn’t do anything wrong.” She mumbled; her voice sounded muffled against Beatrice.
Beatrice winced and Ava tried to pull back.
“Doesn’t mean I didn’t inadvertently cause it.” Beatrice stopped Ava from pulling away by tightening her arms around her shoulders. “Don’t leave yet.”
“You flinched, Bea, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Ava explained. Beatrice’s shoulder twitched again, emphasizing Ava’s point.
“I’m not uncomfortable, Ava.” Beatrice clarified. “My neck is just very sensitive and when you speak or breathe against it, it tickles.”
Ava laughed quietly and turned her head slightly when Beatrice winced again. “I’m sorry.”
“You’re good.” Beatrice rested her head on top of Ava’s.
Ava didn’t know how long they stood like that, but after a while she felt okay again and drew back from the embrace. Beatrice trailed her hands down Ava’s arms and grabbed her hands to stop her from completely moving away.
“Better?”
Ava nodded. “You?” Beatrice nodded as well.
Ava let go of one of Beatrice’s hands but held on to the other to pull her towards her bed. They sat down on the edge.
Ava pulled Beatrice’s hand into her lap and cradled it with both of hers. She looked up questioningly at Beatrice to check if it was alright for her.
Beatrice smiled at her reassuringly. “Do you want to talk about it?”
Ava shrugged helplessly. It took her a moment to get passed the lump in her throat.
“You giving me that beautiful rose this morning kind of sent me into a spiral.” Ava admitted and looked up at her friend. She saw the beginnings of Beatrice’s guilty expression returning.
Ava shook her head. “It wasn’t because of you, Bea. It just made me realize no one had ever gotten me flowers before.”
Beatrice nodded, a little unsure about how that lead to Ava being upset.
“And it made me wonder if there was someone out there for me. Someone who would give me flowers and make other nice romantic gestures. Someone to love me unconditionally.” Ava confessed.
“There has to be, Ava. You’re wonderful and you have such a big heart. Personally, I think anyone should be lucky to love you like that.” Beatrice looked at her with so much care. Ava knew she meant every word.
What Ava didn’t know, was that Beatrice wanted to say so much more.
In that moment, Beatrice decided she was going to show Ava everything she deserved. This little arrangement they had could be mutually beneficial.
“I mean, you’re putting up with a basket case like me, so you’re definitely racking up some good karma points.” Beatrice joked lightly. “They’re probably closer than you think.”
“Don’t call yourself that.” Ava scolded her softly.
Beatrice smiled. “I’m serious though, Ava. Not everyone would do this, you’re a good person and a good friend. You deserve to find your great love just as much as me.”
Ava looked down at their joined hands when Beatrice gave hers a squeeze. She decided she would believe her. At least for now.
---
Beatrice had gotten home a few hours ago, after making things right with Ava. Before leaving they had agreed on the details of their date the next day. They had decided on meeting at Beatrice’s favorite coffee shop.
It was in a place she was extremely familiar with, with social rules she didn’t have to worry about not knowing. A coffee date would also provide the opportunity to leave whenever she wanted.
Not that that last item would be an issue tomorrow.
Beatrice had gone to bed early to try and be well rested for the next day. It hadn’t worked. She had been tossing and turning for over an hour. She couldn’t seem to get settled.
Her phone buzzed on her nightstand. She reached over to check. It wasn’t like she was getting any sleep anyway.
Ava – I’m excited for our date tomorrow
She had seen the girl twice that day and was seeing her again the following day, but she was still glad to be receiving her message.
Beatrice – Are you really?
Ava – Of course!
Ava – I’ve never been on a mock date before
Ava – I want you to have a good time
Ever the considerate friend.
Beatrice – I’m kind of extremely nervous
Ava – Why???
Ava – It’s just me
Ava – Your friendly neighborhood Ava
Ava – But that’s also sort of why I texted
Beatrice – Oh?
Beatrice stared at the blinking dots as Ava typed out her reply. She was curious.
Ava – I know we talked earlier but I wanted to ask about your boundaries. Especially touch, bc I know you’re not always comfortable with it and I don’t want to assume it’ll be the same tomorrow as it was today. Bc earlier we were ‘good friends ava and bea’ but we won’t be on the date
Ava – So where do you stand on casual touches and ~romantic~ handholding and such?
Beatrice felt touched by Ava’s thoughtfulness. Her heart grew for the other girl.
Beatrice – It means a lot to me that you thought of that, so thank you
Beatrice – If it were a real date with someone else, I don’t think I would feel comfortable with being touched at this point
Beatrice – But it’s you and I’m generally used to it and comfortable with it
Ava was the exception. Ava offered physical contact so easily and without expectations. Beatrice never had to worry about how much she would reciprocate or allow, because Ava would be okay with whatever she could offer, even if it was nothing at all.
Beatrice – I’m not sure about the handholding
Ava – Okay, we’ll play it by ear then? :)
Beatrice – That sounds perfect
Ava – Also, if at any point in the date, you want to talk to me or ask me something as Ava, your friend, instead of Ava, your date, just tell me
Ava – I’m your friend before anything else
By now, there were small tears of happiness/relief/gratitude streaming on her face.
Beatrice – You don’t know how much that means to me, thank you so, so much, Ava
Ava thought she had a pretty accurate idea of how much it meant to her friend. She knew her.
Ava – Go get your beauty sleep, Bea
Ava – (not that you’ll need it)
Beatrice – Goodnight Ava, sleep tight
Ava – Goodnight Bea, don’t let the bedbugs bite ;)
Beatrice laid her phone back down on her nightstand. She felt considerably more at ease now.
She drifted off with the thought of Ava on her mind.
---
Beatrice had been jittery all morning. The nerves ava had managed to calm down the night before had returned in full force.
Yasmine took one look at her when she walked into the kitchen and laughed.
“Why do you look constipated?”
Beatrice grimaced. “I’m seeing Ava later.”
It didn’t seem to clarify anything for Yasmine, because she only looked more confused.
“Okay…”
“Remember that date thing I told you about? It’s our first date today.”
“Oh, yes, I remember!” Yasmine’s face lit up for a moment before she frowned again. “Didn’t your friends come up with this idea to make it less stressful for you? It doesn’t exactly seem like it’s working.”
“Yeah, well, tell that to my brain.” Beatrice was pacing back and forth through the kitchen.
“You both have phones, Beatrice, just text her.” Yasmine rolled her eyes fondly.
Beatrice stopped dead in her tracks. “Oh”
She feels stupid all of a sudden. Ava had told her to text her if she needed too. It was really that easy. Why didn’t she think of that?
She pulled out her phone and shot her friend a quick message. Ava replied almost instantly.
Beatrice – Ava?
Ava – Bea
Beatrice – I’m nervous
Ava – You want to meet now? Less time to be nervous
Oh shit.
She did have a point.
Beatrice – Sure, sure, great idea
Ava – I’ll be at the coffee shop in 15
Beatrice – Cool cool
Ava – Very cool cool ;)
Beatrice – Shut upp
Ava – Hahahah
“Oh shit.” Beatrice stood frozen on the kitchen floor.
She raced back to her room to finish getting ready.
They had agreed to treat this as much as a real date as possible and she wanted to look good.
She was wearing an oversized teal polo with the top buttons open to show off a thin silver chain and some off-white pants with the ends cuffed. Her hair was slicked back in a low bun. She topped her outfit off with some silver rings.
She looked at herself in the mirror and figured she looked good. She was as ready as she’d ever be.
She grabbed her stuff and had to stop herself from running out of her room. It only worked a little as she basically powerwalked to the door.
“Good luck!” Yasmine called to her from where she was reading on the couch.
“Thank you, see you later!” Beatrice all but slammed the door shut. She heard Yasmine’s amused laugh from inside follow her down the hall. She didn’t care.
She patted her pockets to make sure she had everything she needed and took the stairs down to the front door. It was another beautiful day outside and Beatrice smiled as she felt the warm sun hit her face.
She rounded the corner to the coffee shop and saw Ava in the distance walking in her direction. When they were about 50 feet apart, she noticed Ava open her mouth to greet her, but she quickly lifted her hand to stop her.
Ava’s sweet smile turned into a confused expression. Beatrice took out her phone and she quickly typed out a text.
Beatrice – One more question
Ava read it and nodded at her to continue; her eyebrows raised in curiosity.
Beatrice – Does the date start now or do we say hi as friends first?
Ava – Maybe starting it now will make it less awkward
Ava – Bc yk if we say hi first and then switch it might be a little… strange?
Beatrice nodded resolutely and pocketed her phone. She gave Ava a double thumbs up, very cool of her. It made Ava laugh and they started walking again, meeting each other halfway.
“Hi Beatrice, you look really nice.” Ava stepped forward to give her a hug.
When they pulled back, Beatrice gave Ava a quick once-over. She didn’t want to stare and make her friend uncomfortable, but what a sight she was.
Ava was wearing a white shirt, only half buttoned to show a sliver of a black top underneath and a loose-fitting pair of jeans. The cuffs of her shirt were messily rolled up to her elbows and she had opted for gold accessories. She looked beautiful.
“You look incredible as always, Ava.” She trailed her eyes back up to Ava’s face and was met with a brilliant smile. She felt her heart skip a beat as she met Ava’s eyes.
It was probably the nerves.
Beatrice held the door open for Ava as they made their way inside. They made small talk as they ordered and waited for it to be ready.
Ava automatically walked over to Beatrice’s preferred table when their drinks were ready. This didn’t go unnoticed by Beatrice and she felt her nerves settle a little. Ava knew her, she was safe, this was going to be okay.
“Why are you looking at me like that? Smiling all mysteriously?” Ava asked as she looked over her shoulder.
Beatrice pulled out of her musing, she hadn’t realized she’d been staring.
“No reason.” She smiled.
Ava hummed, still a little suspicious. Beatrice sat down on her usual spot in the booth and Ava sat down in front of her.
“You know, I seem to be doing all the talking here.” Ava remarked. “You asked me out, maybe I should let you lead the conversation.”
Beatrice’s eyes widened as she felt a mild shot of panic course through her.
“Oh uhm,…” She stuttered. Het head was empty all of a sudden. Zero thoughts. Perfect timing.
“I’m kidding, Bea.” Ava laughed. “I’m just teasing you.”
“Oh, okay.” Beatrice sighed, relief flooding her system.
“Besides, knowing you, you probably prepared a mental list of questions to ask me. Always prepared.” She winked.
Beatrice flushed and averted her eyes. Maybe there was a downside to doing this whole thing with someone who knew her so well.
“Not just mentally.” Beatrice muttered.
“What was that?”
Beatrice scraped her throat and repeated herself.
“It’s not just a mental list.” She pulled a folded note out of her back pocket.
Ava nearly choked on her coffee.
“Oh my god, you’re so predictable.” She laughed.
The whole of Beatrice’s face was bright red. She knew Ava was only joking, but that didn’t stop her from feeling incredibly embarrassed.
“Maybe this dating thing isn’t for me.” Beatrice started to get up from her seat. Ava hastily grabbed her wrist to stop her from getting up completely.
“No, no, Bea, wait. I’m sorry.” Ava looked at her with wide eyes, no longer laughing.
“I don’t know, Ava. I think this was a mistake.” The whole buildup to this moment, all of the nerves and stress and uncertainty and even the excitement was getting too much for Beatrice.
By now, she had gotten so overstimulated that she was about 2 seconds away from crying.
“It’s not, Bea. I’m sorry.” Ava repeated. “You were just so tense and I was trying to use humor to try and make it better.”
God, this was supposed to make it easier. It didn’t feel like it was working.
“Please don’t leave, Beatrice. I’m also a little nervous, if it makes any difference.” She tried again. “It was bad timing. I didn’t mean to treat it as a joke. But I can’t help it. It’s my default.”
Ava looked at her apologetically.
When Beatrice didn’t say anything, but didn’t leave either, Ava took it as a good sign. Beatrice still wouldn’t look her in the eyes, but she hadn’t pulled her hand out of Ava’s grasp either.
“Would you prefer it if I read your questions, or do you want to ask them?” Ava asked softly. She squeezed her hand lightly before letting go.
Beatrice took a sip of her tea, prolonging the silence. She looked around to avoid eye contact, letting her gaze settle on a nearby couple. The guy had his arm around her shoulders and the girl’s hand was placed on his knee.
“How much physical contact is appropriate for a date?” Beatrice asked. She was still looking at the couple. They looked happy, mumbling things in each other’s ears every once in a while.
“It depends.” Ava started. “On the people, the situation, the place, lots of things.”
“But then how would I know when it’s enough? And what if I don’t want to be touched?” Beatrice frowned.
“I don’t know how to answer your first question. For me, it’s kind of intuitive.” Ava replied and Beatrice’s frown deepened, she was nothing with that answer.
“If you’re not comfortable being touched, you just tell them.” Ava continued. “I think clear communication from the start is always good.”
“What if I do want to be touched?”
“Then you tell them that as well.” Ava smiled as Beatrice finally looked at her again.
“Okay, but isn’t that weird?” Beatrice asked. “Always having to say it? Because I also don’t want them to feel like they have to touch me when I say that I want to be touched. Or what if they’re very physical and I’m not?”
They both knew that Beatrice was overthinking it, but ava was used to this when Beatrice worried about something.
“It won’t always be like that. They’ll learn how to read you. Like I did, remember? And if they really care about you, they’ll respect your boundaries either way.”
Beatrice was still a little skeptical. If she ever did start to date someone, who was to say that the girl would stick around long enough to actually care about her?
Beatrice chose to let it go for the moment. Those were worries for future Beatrice. Besides, Ava did have a point.
She and Beatrice couldn’t be more opposite when it came to physical touch, but somehow, they had figured out their dynamic and it had worked out in the end.
Beatrice continued with her next question.
“What if the date isn’t going well and I want to leave?”
The question made Ava laugh.
“Ever the optimist, Bea.”
“Can you just give me an answer, please.”
“Well, I usually give them the benefit of the doubt and still try to make the best of it. But worst-case scenario, I fake an important text or call and leave.”
Beatrice promptly took her phone out of her pocket and checked the screen.
“Oh no, would you look at that. My friend really needs me, I have to go!”
She got out of her seat and started to walk towards the door.
Ava gasped. “Oh, wow! Rude!”
Ava stopped Beatrice as the girl tried to walk past her and pushed her back into her seat in the booth.
Beatrice laughed. “I’m kidding, obviously.”
Okay, Beatrice was teasing her, Ava took that as a good sign. The girl in front of her seemed to have relaxed considerably compared to a few minutes earlier. They were grinning at each other. They had found their dynamic again.
“Any other questions for me?”
“Those were my main concerns about dating that I was able to come up with. But I still have some general questions.”
“Hit me.” Ava smiled encouragingly.
“Awkward silences. How do I avoid them or end them?”
“In my experience, silences don’t always have to be awkward if you’re with the right person. Then they feel more like breaks in the conversation. I know it sounds the same, but it really isn’t.”
Beatrice wasn’t convinced. Prolonged silences almost always felt awkward to her. She would still take Ava’s word for it, though.
“As for ending the silences, you can always just start a new conversation or something.” Ava shrugged.
“How do I do that?”
“How do you start a conversation?” Ava asked and Beatrice nodded. “You can ask them a question about an interest they have or talk about the weather. It can be anything.”
Beatrice nodded again.
Ava had answered a lot of her questions and although she wasn’t sure how things would be on an actual date, she felt a lot more at ease with the idea.
“Do you have any questions for me?” Beatrice asked at last.
“We’ve already covered a lot with your questions, but they all kind of focused on the negative things.”
Beatrice hadn’t noticed, but Ava was right.
These were just the things that caused her the most stress whenever she thought of dating.
“There are other boundaries left we should maybe discuss before we go any further.” Ava finished.
Beatrice wasn’t sure what Ava meant by ‘going any further’.
“It sounds so serious when you say it like that. Should we sign a contract?” Beatrice joked.
“Oh my god. Yes!” Ava laughed.
Ava grabbed some of the napkins on the table and looked through her purse to find pens. She gave a pen and napkin to Beatrice and kept one of either for herself.
“Very romantic, signing a contract on a first date.” Beatrice joked. Though, the lawyer in her was somewhat amused by this.
“Let’s agree on some ground rules.” Ava nodded seriously to herself.
“Okay.” Beatrice mimicked Ava’s determination. “What’s the first rule?”
Ava bounced her pen against her lips in thought. “How about total honesty? We promise to be completely honest about everything regarding this.” She waved her hand between the two of them.
“Yes, that’s a good one.” Beatrice approved and they both wrote it down on their respective napkins.
~ Fake date contract ~
- Complete honesty
“Do you want to come up with the next one?” Ava asked.
“How about if either of us wants to back out, we stop this, no questions asked.”
“That seems reasonable.” Ava agreed. “But isn’t it kind of a contradiction to our first rule?”
Beatrice tilted her head in thought.
“It doesn’t have to be. It can be the exception.”
- Either can break it off, no questions
“Anything else?”
Both were thinking of one other thing to add, but neither of them said anything. Instead, opting to keep the naivety going.
What if either of them caught feelings?
“Not that I can think of at the moment.” Beatrice replied.
“We can always add to it as we go on.” Ava said.
“That’s not really how a signed contract works, but okay.” Beatrice scrunched her nose.
Ava knew Beatrice’s tells, she laughed when she saw her expression.
“I know it’s not how it’s supposed to be, but in this case, we make the rules, so we can change it whenever we want.” Ava concluded.
“Fine.” Beatrice rolled her eyes in fake exasperation.
Read and approved
Beatrice Young
She looked over her tidy handwriting and couldn’t help but laugh at the foolishness of it all. She slid it over to Ava, who did the same.
Ava’s handwriting definitely wasn’t as neat as hers, but it was legible enough. She had added a little heart after her name.
Beatrice added her name to the other napkin as well and stared at it for a moment.
“It looks so official.” Ava said, not entirely unserious.
“I’m not sure it would hold up in court, but it’ll do.” Beatrice folded the makeshift contract delicately and placed it in her breast pocket. She made a mental note not to forget to take it out before throwing her shirt in the laundry.
Their drinks had been long finished and Beatrice considered asking Ava if she wanted another drink. But when she saw how beautiful the weather was outside, she quickly changed her mind.
“Would you like to go for a walk with me?” She asked instead.
“Yes, I’d love to.” Ava carefully stashed away her napkin in her purse and got up to leave.
The sun had hit its highest point in the sky and Ava sighed as soon she could feel the rays hit her skin. She closed her eyes and turned her face up to the sun, reveling in its warmth. It didn’t take long for her smile to turn into a grimace.
“Okay, abort mission, I think I’ve gone blind.” She blinked rapidly to get rid of the blind spots in her vision. Beatrice laughed and took her shades hanging from her shirt.
“What did you think was going to happen? Do you want my sunglasses?”
“I don’t know! I wasn’t thinking! And don’t you need them?”
“I’m good. I know not to look directly into the sun.” Beatrice teased.
“My eyes were closed!”
“Still.” Beatrice rolled her eyes.
“Okay, thank you, I love you.” Ava gratefully took the offered sunglasses and put them on. She immediately felt better. “You’re actually the best, Bea.”
“I don’t know a lot about dating, but dropping the l-word on a first date seems extremely fast, ever for lesbians.” Beatrice noted dryly.
Ava laughed and lighlty bumped her shoulder. “That was a friend Ava I love you and you know it.”
They walked towards the nearby park. The trees would provide some cover against the burning sun.
“So, there’s no u-haul waiting for us around the corner?”
“Ha ha, very funny, Beatrice.” Ava rolled her eyes.
Ava had been talking for a while when they reached the tree line, but Beatrice had only been paying half attention. She was watching the other couples out for a stroll in the park.
Most of them were holding hands. Some determined couples even had their arms around each other despite the heat.
“Bea?” Ava asked, pulling her out of her thoughts.
“I’m sorry, I got distracted.” Beatrice said sheepishly. “Did you ask me something?”
“It’s okay, I wasn’t saying anything important. What were you looking at?”
“Oh...” Beatrice’s cheeks colored slightly. “It’s nothing.”
“Rule number one, Bea. I feel like you’re not being honest with me right now.” Ava playfully nudged her arm.
“They’re holding hands.” Beatrice stated, nodding at a couple walking by.
Understanding dawned on Ava.
“Do you want to hold hands?” Ava asked carefully.
“It’s a date thing to do.” Beatrice said matter-of-factly, not exactly answering the question.
“True.” Ava nodded, both of them looking at the couple until they passed.
“I would be okay with it, if you wanted to hold hands.” Ava added when Beatrice didn’t say anything.
“It’s hot and our hands would get sweaty.” Beatrice pointed out.
“I wouldn’t mind. If it gets too much for you or you don’t like the feeling, you can always let go.” Ava assured her.
Beatrice said nothing more, but after a moment, she effortlessly caught Ava’s hand mid-swing and interlaced their fingers without missing a beat. As if she’d done it a hundred times before.
They walked on in companiable silence for a while. Simply enjoying the day and each other’s company.
“So, lovely weather we’re having, eh?”
Ava laughed, recognizing the sentence she said to Beatrice on their previous walk.
“Nice conversation starter.” Ava teased.
“Thanks, I learned from the best.” Beatrice grinned back.
“Ooh, flattery, I like it.” She winked.
“Good to know.”
“That actually reminds me of another thing I wanted to discuss with you.” Ava swung their hands back and forth as they kept walking.
“Go on.”
“How do you feel about flirting?”
Beatrice could feel the hand holding Ava’s starting to sweat and she resisted the urge to let go and wipe it on her pants.
“I hadn’t really thought about it, to be fair.” She admitted.
“Would you want to try it? Some light flirting?”
Beatrice could feel her nerves getting worse by the second. Ava flirting with her?
She had seen the way Ava could make even the most confident of people get flustered when she wanted to. She wasn’t sure if she would be able to handle it.
Would she even be able to flirt back? She had never tried to.
“Yeah, I think I’d be open to it.”
“Are you sure you could handle it, Beatrice?” Ava dropped her voice, apparently immediately diving in.
“Hmm, why don’t you find out?” Beatrice matched Ava’s tone.
She sounded a lot calmer than she felt.
Fake it ‘til you make it, right?
“Oh my god, this is going to be so much fun!” Ava exclaimed, pulling on Beatrice’s hand.
Beatrice laughed along with her. She had been doing a lot of that today.
“You’ll tell me if I go too far though, right?” Ava asked.
“I will, I promise. Don’t worry.” Beatrice confirmed.
“Maybe we should agree on a safe word or something.” Ava mused.
“A safe word? Isn’t that for like sex and stuff?” Beatrice asked, confused.
Ava gasped.
“Miss Young! Talking about sex on the first date?! Scandalous!”
“Shut up, stupid.” Beatrice snorted. But she could feel a blush creeping up her cheeks.
“Damn, now you’re calling me stupid too. I think we should break up.” Ava dramatically wiped away some non-existent tears.
“Oh darling, no!” Beatrice played along and tugged on Ava’s hand until she stood in front of her. She grabbed her other hand as well and lifted them to her lips. “Please forgive me! How could I ever make it up to you?”
The overdramatic look in Ava’s eyes switched instantly. Ava’s hands shifted, one made its way to the nape of Beatrice’s neck and the other one to the front of Beatrice’s pants. She hooked a finger around her belt and pulled herself closer, leading with her hips. She tugged on Beatrice’s neck to bring their faces closer together.
“I can think of a few ways you can make it up to me.” She whispered in into Beatrice’s ear with a sultry voice. She was so close that Beatrice could feel her breath on her neck.
Beatrice shot away from her as if she’d been burned. Her heart beating about a million miles an hour. Ava burst out laughing. Ava 1 – Beatrice 0.
Uhu, yeah, okay, maybe she wasn’t going to survive this.
“A safe word might be a good idea, yes.” Beatrice could feel her face burning hot red. Ava looked at her and started laughing even harder.
“Your face! Bea, it’s priceless! Oh, I wish I had filmed it. Camila would’ve loved this.”
“Okay, great, yes, let’s make some more fun of me. Your favorite activity, apparently.” Beatrice glared at Ava.
The girl wasn’t fazed, though. She knew it was an act.
“Come on, you big cry baby.” Ava chuckled, trying to keep her laughter under control. “I couldn’t resist.”
“Fine, maybe it was a little funny.” Beatrice relented. Now the moment had passed, and she had calmed down, she could see the humor in it. Though she still felt somewhat self-conscious.
And a little turned on. Only natural when your smoking hot friend flirted with you, right?
“Yeah, it was.” Ava beamed.
“I must warn you, though. You won’t catch me off guard again.”
“Is that a promise, Bea?” Ava challenged.
“You’ll see.” Beatrice smirked at her. She vowed to herself to rise to the challenge next time Ava tried something like that again.
Two could play this game.
Or at least try.
But maybe not right this instant.
“Explain this safe word thing.” Beatrice tried to get back on track. “And before you start, I don’t mean that kind of safe word.”
Ava had already started to open her mouth to tease Beatrice again but shut it after Beatrice finished her sentence.
“You’re no fun.” She pouted.
Ava smoothly slid her hand back into Beatrice’s as they continued walking.
“What I meant was that maybe we should agree on some kind of cue when one of us goes too far or is uncomfortable, you know? Or when we want to talk to our friend instead of date when we’re out.”
Beatrice thought about this for a moment. It wasn’t a bad idea.
Once again, she was amazed by how considerate her friend was.
It made her smile.
“That’s… actually a great idea, Ava.” She admitted.
“I know.” Ava beamed.
“Any suggestions?”
“What about spaghetti?”
“Spaghetti?” Beatrice snorted.
Ava nodded.
“Why spaghetti? And isn’t it supposed to be a word you barely use?” Beatrice was still laughing.
“Why not spaghetti? I love pasta.” Ava happily declared.
“Okay, weirdo, spaghetti it is.”
They sauntered around for a while longer until they ended up in front of Beatrice’s apartment.
“Thank you for walking me home.” Beatrice smiled at the girl next to her.
“Thank you for a wonderful date.” Ava replied, mirroring her smile. “You’re not going to ghost me now, are you?”
“I’ll get back to you in about 3 to 5 business days.” Beatrice replied with fake seriousness, earning a shove from Ava. “No, of course not, I wouldn’t dare.”
“You better not. I know where you live.” Ava narrowed her eyes at her. Beatrice didn’t feel the least bit threatened.
Ava let go of her hand.
Beatrice was rocking back and forth on her feet, suddenly feeling a little nervous.
What now?
This was the end of their date. What was the etiquette for the end of a first date?
Do they hug? Do they wave goodbye? Do they… kiss?
No.
Definitely not that.
Beatrice startled when Ava wove her hand in front of her face. She had totally zoned out.
“Where did you just go?” Ava chuckles.
“Nowhere.” Beatrice said hastily.
Ava looked a little skeptical but didn’t prod.
“I was saying how I had fun today and I hope that you did too.”
“I did.” Beatrice nodded, not finding the words to accurately describe how she felt.
“Don’t be a stranger, okay?” Ava urged.
“I won’t.” Beatrice shook her head.
“Alright.”
They stood in front of each other a little awkwardly. Neither of them sure on how to proceed.
“I’m going to hug you goodbye now, is that okay?” Ava asked eventually.
Beatrice nodded rapidly.
Ava embraced her tightly for a moment. The hug didn’t last long as Ava could feel how Beatrice tensed at the contact.
When they let go of each other, Ava turned around and started walking away.
Beatrice turned around as well and unlocked the door to make her way inside.
When she made it to her floor, her phone buzzed with a notification.
Ava – Don’t overthink it, Bea
Beatrice let out a shaky laugh. Was she really that easy to read?
Beatrice – No promises
Beatrice – But I’ll try
Ava – <3
Beatrice let herself into an empty apartment. Yasmine must have left while she was out.
When she got to her room, she took the napkin-contract out of her pocket and safely placed it in the top drawer of her nightstand.
She let herself fall flat on her back onto her bed. She didn’t usually allow outside clothes on her bed, but she couldn’t care less at the moment.
She replayed her entire day in her head, feeling strangely bubbly.
When she got to the part where Ava hugged her goodbye and she had stood there stiffly, she couldn’t help but think back to the first time Ava had hugged her.
---
Beatrice sat behind her desk, trying and failing to focus on the material in front of her.
She sighed in frustration and leaned back in her chair.
“You okay there, Beatrice?” Mary asked.
“I need a break.” Beatrice turned her chair around.
“Do you want to join me and my friend for dinner? She should’ve been here already, but she’s not exactly punctual.”
Before Beatrice could reply, there was a knock on the door.
Mary went to open the door as Beatrice stood up.
“I know, I’m late, but it’s not my fault. I saw this lady walking her puppy on the way here and I just had to pet it, it was so cute.” The girl talked a mile a minute.
Mary took a step to the side as the girl walked in without waiting for an invitation and gave her a hug in greeting.
“Oh hi!” She said when she spotted Beatrice over Mary’s shoulder.
“You must be Beatrice! I’ve heard so many good things about you from Mary. She was always complaining about her previous roommates, but now she’s constantly talking about how you’re a dream to room with. It’s so nice to finally meet you.”
The girl quickly crossed the room to give Beatrice a hug as well. The moment Beatrice realized what the girl was doing, she completely froze.
She didn’t like being touched and especially not by a stranger.
“No!” She said and pulled back quite forcefully.
The girl visibly startled by Beatrice’s reaction, clearly not expecting it.
“No.” Beatrice repeated, her gaze firmly fixed on the door behind the other people in the room. “I’m going for a walk.”
Beatrice quickly grabbed her keys, phone and noise canceling headphones and rushed out of her dorm.
She could hear the girl ask her roommate what just happened right before she placed the headphones on her head.
By the time she came back to her dorm, she felt a lot calmer than when she left. It had gotten dark outside and there was no trace of Mary or the other girl. She went to sleep not long after.
The following days, nothing out of the ordinary happened. One day she returned from classes to someone sitting in front of her dorm.
Their hood was pulled up and they were leaning their head against the door.
When Beatrice got closer, she saw that it was the girl from a few days before. Mary’s friend.
Her steps halted a few feet away, she didn’t want to get closer.
She was debating whether she should turn around and go to the library to study or risk a confrontation with the girl. She would’ve gone to the library immediately after class, but she had forgotten her laptop charger that morning.
It didn’t matter, she could use the notes she had taken by hand after her laptop had died.
She started turning around to walk back, but that was the exact moment the other girl looked up.
The girl noticed her intention to make a quick escape and she scrambled up.
“Wait!” She called.
“Mary has class, she’s not here right now.” Beatrice fought the urge to flee as the girl slowly walked towards her. She glanced at the staircase behind her.
“I know, I was looking for you.”
That made Beatrice look up at the other girl.
She stood about 10 feet away from her, not getting closer.
“Oh. Why?” Beatrice asked, confused.
“I wanted to apologize to you.” She explained.
Beatrice nodded slowly, still not understanding.
“Okay… why?”
“Because I made you uncomfortable.” She started as she stepped to the side of the hallway, making space so Beatrice could pass her if she wanted to.
Beatrice didn’t say anything, but she did cautiously walk around the other girl towards her door.
“After you left, Mary explained how you don’t like to be touched. I shouldn’t have just hugged you like that without checking if you’d be okay with it. I’m sorry about that.”
Beatrice unlocked her door and stood awkwardly in the doorway, not sure what to do.
“Do you want to come in?” Beatrice asked haltingly.
She could feel the girl’s gaze on her face as she waited a few feet away. Beatrice had meticulously avoided eye contact since the girl had started talking.
“Are you asking me because you want me to come in or because you think it’s the polite thing to do?” The girl answered her question with another question.
This made Beatrice finally look at the girl’s face.
“The latter.” Beatrice admitted with a slight blush.
The other girl laughed softly and some of the tension in Beatrice’s shoulders eased a little.
“I’ll keep it short then.” The girl smiled at Beatrice and Beatrice quickly averted her eyes again.
“Like I said last time, I’ve heard nothing but great things about you and you’re my best friend’s roommate, so I would love it if we could become friends as well.
“I’m naturally a very touchy person, you can ask Mary, but I sometimes forget that not everybody likes that. So, I’m sorry again for making you feel uncomfortable. I hope you would give me a second chance to make a better impression.”
Beatrice could hear the nerves in the other girl’s voice as she explained. At some point when the girl was talking, Beatrice’s gaze had wandered back to her face, somehow drawn to it.
She had a very expressive face and Beatrice could clearly read the sincerity written all over her pretty features.
Beatrice wasn’t sure how to reply to all that. Nor did she understand how her feelings towards the girl had done a complete 180.
Where she had felt reluctant to see her a few minutes ago, she was now comfortable in her presence.
“I think it would be nice to be friends.” She said hesitantly.
“Are you saying that because you mean it or because it’s what you think I want to hear?” The girl tilted her head, an amused smile playing on her lips.
“The former.” Beatrice finally smiled back.
“Well then, it’s nice to formally meet you, Beatrice. I’m Ava.”
Ava stuck out her hand in front of her.
Beatrice stepped forward to gently shake her hand.
She has soft hands, Beatrice thought as Ava let go of her hand.
“Well, I won’t hold you. I hope to see you soon, Beatrice.” Ava said as she stepped back.
Ava waved and smiled at her enthusiastically before she turned around and walked away.
Beatrice felt a lot better as she closed the door behind her. Her day had brightened significantly.
--
Beatrice didn’t usually like to go out, but when Mary asked if she wanted to join her and friends for a few drinks on Friday, she accepted the invitation.
The bar they went to wasn’t far from their campus, but not so close that it was filled by drunk college kids. It wasn’t too busy and the place was pleasantly lit.
They made their way to a table in the back of the bar where there were already a few people waiting for them.
A few guys and Mary’s new girlfriend, Shannon, were already seated around the table with a few drinks in front of them. They welcomed them heartily as Mary introduced her to the group.
She had already met Shannon, of course, and the girl gently smiled at her in greeting.
She sat down as Mary got them drinks. A coke for Beatrice and a beer for herself. The group talked amongst each other.
Beatrice had gotten about halfway through her coke when Ava showed up, apologizing profusely for being late, again.
She swiftly went around the group, giving everyone a hug. When she got to Beatrice, she was careful not to enter her personal space and instead opted to wave eagerly from about 5 feet away.
It caused Beatrice to laugh and wave back. A little less enthusiastically, but no less happy to see the other girl.
She felt some happy tears pricking behind her eyes. The way the other girl adapted so easily to Beatrice’s needs without treating her any different, made her feel more accepted than ever before. And they barely even knew each other!
She didn’t want to ruin the moment by letting her emotions show and having to explain without things getting heavy, so she refused to let the tears fall.
Beatrice had stayed out a lot longer than she had planned to. The group had tried to include her in their conversations without forcing anything and she had truly enjoyed the evening.
The bar eventually had to kick them out at closing time. They talked a little more until Ava started shivering.
The group hugged each other goodbye as Beatrice stood a little to the side, waiting for Mary to walk back to their dorm room.
When Ava had finished hugging her friends, she raised her hand to wave goodbye to Beatrice again, but Beatrice lightly shook her head.
Ava’s hand stilled halfway into the air and Beatrice tilted her head, silently trying to convey a message to Ava.
Ava raised her eyebrows in question, as if to ask if she was sure.
Beatrice wasn’t certain where this feeling came from, but she wasn’t about to question it. She nodded.
Ava took a few steps closer, slow enough for Beatrice to step away at any moment or even stop her if she wanted to.
When Beatrice opened her arms a little, Ava stepped in between them and gave her a light hug. Ava was careful not to overstep or hold on for too long.
Not a word was said between them, but they understood each other perfectly in that moment.
What Beatrice didn’t notice was how Mary had watched their entire exchange with glossy eyes and a fond smile on her face.
Beatrice waved to the others and everyone parted ways to go back to their own places.
She and Mary talked about Mary’s friends as they walked back. Beatrice told her how she liked them and was glad she had gone out with them.
But she couldn’t stop thinking about one of them in particular.
Beatrice didn’t know it yet, but Ava would become very important to her. She barely knew her, but the girl had already had an impact on her.
Ava gave away touch so naturally, that for the first time in her life, it only felt natural to Beatrice for her to accept it.