She hates him.
She doesn't think she's ever hated anyone before, but she hates him. Hates him for who he is. For what he did. For making her care about him. For making her become what she has become.
Fitz's hands shake, and Jemma hates Grant Ward.
She hates him for the way Fitz looks when he can't finish his sentence, the look of frustration in his eyes, the way he shies away. She hates him for what he did to them. She hates him because they're just a little out of sync now and she doesn't know how to get back, doesn't know if they'll ever get back.
Sometimes she feels like she's still drowning, kicking to stay afloat.
She killed someone. Not in self-defense, not trying to save another's life. She killed a man and that blood is on her hands. But what hurts, what aches inside her is that she is not upset that she killed him. She is upset because he was the wrong man.
Jemma Simmons has blood on her hands, and she is not satisfied yet.