Nothing is Sacred

Loki woke up to the sound of someone yelling “Thor! Breakfast is ready!” Really loudly.

Loki tried to cover his face but it was too late because Captain America was marching into the room.

“Thor!” He said cheerfully.

He froze when he saw Loki on the couch. He must have only seen the hair because he asked, “Tony? What are you doing on Thor’s couch?”

Loki lowered the blanket and glared at him. “Please do not mistake me for that man.” He said. “I am actually intelligent.”

“Who are you?” Captain America asked. “Thor! There’s a man on your couch!”

Thor was striding out of his room then. He wore the stupid armor and had the hammer on hip.

“Aye, Steven this is Loki. Loki, this is Steven.”

Steve’s eyes narrowed at that. “Loki? Like the God?”

Loki stood up quickly. “No. Not like the God.” Loki said and sent a pointed cold glare in Thor’s direction. “Like the world famous scholar and Atheist.”

“Really Thor? An Atheist?” Steve asked.

“Loki is having a difficult time remembering. But yes, he grew up in my world. I know not how he came to be here. I wish to have Dr. Banner look him over.”

“No.” Loki said sharply. “You said you would take me back. I don’t want to be your stupid lab rat.”

“I just want to figure out what ails you Loki.” Thor said. “Surely you will at least let the Doctor examine you.”

“I know he’s not that kind of Doctor!” Loki said sharply.

“Okay.” Steve clapped his hands nervously. He looked like he wasn’t even sure about what he was witnessing. “How about breakfast? I made enough pancakes for everyone.”

“Steven is right. Let us go Loki. We can discuss the matter over a hearty breakfast.” Thor said.

Loki’s stomach growled. “Fine.” He said miserably and followed them.

Breakfast, turns out only to be Steve (who is busy trying to work the coffee machine) Natasha Romanoff, Thor and Bruce Banner.

“I can x-ray you.” Bruce Banner said some time later after they had all eaten. “I’m not a total expert in neuro science though. But I can definitely look you over.”

“I don’t think that will be necessary.” Loki said. “Thor has deluded himself into thinking I’m some sort of God. He will get over it soon enough.”

That earned him a few raised eyebrows.

“What?” Loki asked sharply.

“I just think it’s odd.” Natasha Romanoff said. “We have Thor, one Norse God who has all the abilities he should have, and is from another world. And then we find you. You have the same name as one of the Gods. It’s just too much of a coincidence.”

“I don’t believe in Fate.” Loki said.

“I thought it over last night.” Thor said quietly. Everyone turned to listen to him. “I think you should come to Asgard with me.”

Loki raised an eyebrow. “You want me to go to your fantasy land? No thanks. I prefer reality.”

“Asgard is real. We both spent our youths there.” Thor said. “The Queen of Asgard, Frigga, is a very talented seidr mage. I believe that she can help you remember.”

Loki raised an eyebrow. “And how are we supposed to get to Asgard? A flying carpet?”

“Don’t be ridiculous.” Thor laughed. “We shall ride the rainbow bridge.”

Of course.

Loki agrees to go to Asgard. Only so that Thor will leave him alone for the day and let him go teach his class.

But when Loki stepped into his religious studies class he almost drops his books when he sees Thor sitting in the back. The bastard.

It is an awkward lecture. Because before Loki’s very eyes he sees Thor pull a notebook out and start taking notes. He even asks a pretty girl near him to borrow a pencil and Loki can’t help wondering if Thor has seen high school movies.

After the lecture Loki goes up to Thor’s desk and all but pulls him out of the room.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Loki asked spitefully.

“I thought to see you teaching. I must say, you are a very talented teacher.” Thor said with a cheesy smile. “And I wanted to take you to Asgard now.”

Loki looked down at his teacher outfit. But then he shrugged. What did he care? He had yet to see if this Asgard was even real.

“I did promise you. Let’s go.” Loki said.

Thor led Loki out of the building and before Loki could stop him, he grabbed him and they took off.

Thor made them land in a field outside of New York and Loki almost emptied his stomach upon impact. Loki was kneeling on the grass when Thor just picked him up. “Are you well?” Thor asked.

Loki glared. “As fine as I’ll ever be.” Loki looked around the field. “This doesn’t look like a magical realm.”

“You shall see it soon enough. It will welcome you.”

And then Thor stepped a little away and said, “Heimdall! Open the Bifrost!”

The name Heimdall rings a bell. From Norse myth, he hated Loki.

Before Loki can think it over further light explodes around them and he feels like his skin is ripped off. They hurl through the stars and they pass galaxies and stars. Loki’s eyes widen when they see distant quasars and the luminous lights of a sky he’s never seen before.

There are so many astrophysicists who would love to see this. But yet here he is, some guy who happens to share the name of a Norse God.

They land in a golden room Loki has never seen before and this time he actually spits up some bile.

“You will grow used to it again.” Thor said as he rubbed Loki’s back.

Loki pushed Thor away grumpily. “Stop that. I’ve never had to do that before. I know I would remember that.”

Thor gives Loki space. Until Loki’s stomach settles and then they leave the room. A dark skinned man is standing outside the door. His eyes are white, unseeing and Loki guesses he must be Heimdall. Or at least maybe some alien who thinks he is Heimdall.

Maybe they are all deluded. A sad group of humanoid beings who think themselves the people of Norse myth. And maybe Loki is going to live out the Allegory of the cave and save them.

Although that sounds too fanciful.

Thor has them both climb on a horse and they ride on a rainbow bridge toward a golden castle.

Loki looks around and sees how desolate everything is. Beneath them, stars and galaxies spin on their expansive quests and above them is only darkness. Ahead of them is the castle, and it is unlike everything Loki has ever seen.

He has studied European history and none of the castles have ever resembled the one Thor was taking him to.

So Asgard appeared to be real. But nothing was jogging Loki’s memory. It looks like a hallucination honestly. Like something he had seen in dreams, and forgotten in waking.

Loki was filled with questions honestly. What was this place? How was Thor involved? And how could Loki even possibly be from this place?

They rode through a city and a few people waved to Thor. Loki didn’t know what to make of anything. The people in Asgard looked human. Yet they claimed to be Gods. How could that be?

They reached the castle and Thor took Loki’s hand and led them up a set of golden steps. Loki’s eyes were wide as he looked around. A cool wind whistled through the halls, and everywhere all around them was gold. Everything he saw was gold. What in the world…

“Thor!” A woman’s voice called. “You have returned.”

A woman approaches. In ridiculous armor like Thor and with dark hair like Loki. Her face is so pointy that it could hardly be considered beautiful, but Thor looks glad to see her. She stops in her tracks and even takes a step backward when she sees Loki. She looks him up and down and turns to Thor. “Thor, I thought—“

“I did as well. But you see him as I do. It is Loki. Clear as day.”

She nods. “It’s good to see you Laufeyson.” She says. That last word has some meaning to it. And Loki can’t tell if she’s trying to bait him or not. But the word Laufeyson doesn’t stir any recognition. It is just a word.

“Sif.” Thor admonished. “Loki is back after so long. Treat him with respect.”

“I always will.” Sif said.

“We are seeking an audience with the King and Queen.” Thor says meaningfully.

Sif’s face pinches in confusion. “But—“

The look on Thor’s face shuts her up and she is nodding. “I will notify them.” She said. And Loki had no idea what it was that Thor silently told her.

“I will get them myself.” Thor said. “If you could take Loki to the solar.”

Sif nods. And Thor goes.

Loki wonders what the secrecy is about.

The room Sif takes him to is garishly beautiful like the rest of the place. A plush couch and several chairs stand around, and Loki opts to look out the window.

“Are you well?” Sif asked awkwardly into the silence.

Loki turns to her. “I am on a strange world full of people I do not know. I don’t think well is the right word.”

She steps forward and looks at him strangely. “But you know me Loki.” She says and she picks up a strand of her own dark hair, “It is your hair that grows out of my head.”

In the silence of the room Loki can only hear his own heartbeat.

Because he knows the myth. Loki was jealous of Sif, and cut her hair in the night. And replaced it with his own hair. He wanted her to be ugly.

He has black hair. His name is Loki.

She has black hair. Her name is Sif.

He feels sick.

“I have never met you before in my life.” Loki’s voice is choked.

Sif’s eyes are wide. “How can you say that? We’ve known each other since we were children. I’ve known you for eight hundred years Loki. We know each other.”

Loki is shaking his head. Eight hundred years? Where did she even get that number? Loki is twenty seven. Not eight hundred. She can only be mistaken.

“That is enough Sif.” Thor says.

They both turn and see that Thor is flanked with two people. Loki has never seen them before, but Sif is deferential to them. Bowing just slightly and then taking her leave.

They are both older. The man on Thor’s left has white hair and white beard and is missing an eye. And the woman has long long blonde hair and is breathtaking. They must be the King and Queen.

The woman sweeps in first. “Thor tells us that you are having difficulties remembering.” She says as she looks him over.

One of her hands reaches out to touch his arm but Loki just steps away. “I remember enough.” Loki said. “I know that I haven’t been here before.”

She nods. Then turns to Thor. “Come with me, we must gather some supplies.”

Thor goes with her. Leaving Loki alone with the old man. Loki has never been in the company of royalty. He won’t squander the opportunity.

He just sits and looks up at Loki with his one eye. He doesn’t look much like a King to Loki. He just looks old and tired.

“Do you have a family on Midgard?” He asks.

“No.” Loki said with crossed arms. He sits on the arm of one of the chairs. “I do not.”

Silence lapses again. And Loki scrutinizes the man.

“You look at me with hatred.” The man says. “Why?”

“I do not hate you.” Loki says. “I do not know you. But I hate monarchy. It’s horribly archaic. An old King just gives his Kingdom to his son even though his son is unworthy of ruling.” And Loki turns his head then and smirks. The look on the old man’s face is priceless. He has probably never had anyone say this to him. “And I know Thor is your son. You’ll just give him the throne, worthy or not. And you could doom this place.”

“What would you have me do instead?”

“That is not my place to say. I am not from here. I do not have a Father to give me a throne.” Loki shrugged and smiled to himself. “You lot here think yourselves Gods. And all I see is some advanced technology and a lot of natural resources. I am going to figure this place out.”

“If anyone figures it out it will be you. You have hardly changed.” The man said. He looked sad now. Bone tired and weary, but there was a melancholia to him that Loki hadn’t seen before.

But before Loki can examine it further Thor and Frigga return.

Frigga steps to Loki and reaches an arm out like she’s going to touch him, hug him, ruffle his hair, Loki can’t quite tell. But she aborts the motion when she remembers that Loki doesn’t like touch.

“If you lie down I can examine you.” She says with a warm smile.

Loki nods. For some reason he feels compelled to do as she asks. He can’t explain it, it’s like her presence exudes trust. Loki has never felt anything like it.

When he is laying down she sits above his head. He looks up at her and she smiles down at him. “You are safe Loki. All will be well.” She says and brushes a hand through his hair. Loki’s breath catches when he remembers Thor doing the same thing to him. He had so many questions.

Loki feels her place her hands at his temples. “I am going to use seidr, it might feel strange.” Frigga murmurs.

“What is—“ Loki begins but before he can finish gold ribbons of light are obscuring his vision. He violently tries to shoo them away, fend them off, but Frigga just shushes him and keeps smiling at him.

“That is my seidr.” She said. “It will not hurt you.”

Loki takes a deep breath and with wide eyes he lays back down. Her hands resume their placement and more of the gold ribbons glimmer to life.

The gold lights are pretty. They flit around him. Brushing against his skin and almost kissing him with small pinpricks of sensation. And Loki thinks that he has calmed down sufficiently.

Until green lights begin to bloom from his skin and float upward.

“What the hell!” Loki yelled as a large band of green light wrapped around his hand. He tries to shake it off, and instead the rug in the room catches fire.

Frigga whispers some words and Loki feels his heartbeat slowing. Whatever she just said made him calm down.

“That was your seidr.” Frigga says. And even though Loki is pretty sure he just caught her expensive furniture on fire, she sounds happy. “You still have it. All of it is still with you.” She sounds so relieved. “I thought you had lost it with your memory.”

“So his memory can be saved?” Thor asked.

“Thor, I told you to remain silent. Loki needs to be calm for this.” Frigga chastised.

Thor shuts up.

Frigga eases Loki back down and he closes his eyes and lets her work the seidr around him. He is beyond disbelief at this point and very likely in shock.

“Oh.” Frigga says a few moments later.

“What?” Thor asks in panic. And even the old man looks concerned.

“I cannot return Loki’s memory.” Frigga said. The lights faded around them and Loki looks up at her. Why? Why can’t she help him?

“Because the one who locked them away was Loki. And I cannot undo the spell.” Frigga said sadly.