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Fleeing was not something he enjoyed. It wasn’t dignified and it certainly didn’t work half of the time. However, desperate times called for desperate measures and all that, so Loki figured it was a good time as any to swallow his dignity and boot it the hell out of their to the lab with Dr. Banner and Mr. Stark.

Never let it be said that Loki didn’t know when to retreat. Thor wouldn’t be working with Dr. Banner or Mr. Stark, so it was safe ground, and he fled easily and quickly. It was a good thing that Director Fury had only said an agent would be joining the two of them.

If he had specified, pointed in the direction of him, he would have been screwed. He couldn’t blot out his entire existence. The spell was minor, meant to drag the least amount of attention from anyone sensitive to his seidr like Clint and Natasha.

It only made him harder to notice, not invisible.

There was a difference—a very large difference.

He thanked the Norns that Fury was smar6t and considerate and one hundred times better than Odin.

Blessed be the Nine…

Lurking in the corner, he merely observed Tony and Bruce working, watched the billionaire and the scientist goof off a bit because they were in the company of Tony Stark. The man seemed to utterly fail at being serious even when times were dire.

Tony Stark was a man of many words, but Loki had never heard the word serious be used with him. Now, Bruce banner was the opposite. The man got his life ruined by his dedication to his work, but Loki knew a thing or two about having something in your blood you’d rather not.

He could relate to both men, to some degree, and watching them work only seemed to enforce that. However, his mind seemed to helpfully forget after a moment that sharp was a word used to describe both men—sensitive to detail and all that.

“What’s your story?” came Tony’s voice and Bruce looked up at the same time Loki did, but he didn’t look at Tony, he looked over at Loki. He was perched on the counter in the corner, legs crossed Indian style and slouched forward, fingers twisting a thread of visible magic.

Both pairs of quizzical brown eyes on him left him feeling more than a little out of his depth, but he remained neutral in expression. Tossing a cursory glance around the room as he shrugged his shoulders noncommittally, he allocated the exit—he had already knew exactly where it was, but he needed something to do.

“Which agent are you?” Tony asked and Loki cringed inwardly. Of course the billionaire liked asking questions—he probably enjoyed listening to himself talk, but something told him there was more to the billionaire than he let on typically.

“Agent U235.”

Bruce coughed, cocking an eyebrow in response and Loki returned the expression in full, straightening and rising from his spot, arms coming up to cross his chest.

“Like, as in uranium?”

Loki nodded his head.

“Why7?”

“I’m in charge of blowing things up.”

Tony sputtered, fingers pressing into the keys of his board before he quickly let up, deleting the accidental letters and numbers. Typing in what he needed to, he turned once more, leaning his hip against the table he was standing at and crossing his arms over his chest.

“So, every other agent just goes by their least name and you get an element? Are you special?”

Loki shrugged, walking over and gazing over the numbers Tony just entered into the database, watching as they were scanned and results popped up, twisting lines of green numbers and he could tell why Tony was certified as a genius.

“You could say that.”

He turned sharp emerald orbs on Tony before letting loose a smile.

“Do either of you want something to eat? According to your files, you both tend to forego meals.”

Bruce blinked, checked his watch and blinked again, eyes slowly widening while Tony seemed to mull over the question as if it were something of great importance, like whether or not Stark Industries should go back to manufacturing weapons.

“Sure.”

“Why not?”

Loki nearly rolled his eyes as the two scientists spoke at the same time, a broad grin stretching across Tony’s lips as he got into the groove of the idea of food.

All three of them exited the lab, the two following Loki’s lead as he headed to a lower level on the helicarrier that had the lunch room.

According to Clint, it reminded him of high school. Natasha said it was more like college. It had taken five minutes before the argument had been settled to it could be either or. He smiled fondly at the memory.

Striking up a conversation with Stark turned out to be rather simple, Loki found out. The man could talk, but he didn’t ramble; let you get a word in edgewise and always made sure to stay on topic. Banner was a bit harder to get on board, but Loki figured living with the need to keep your heart rate in check and avoiding people close to constantly could that to you.

Eventually, though, the doctor fell into a rhythm and he joined in steadily as well. Loki watched as they both slowly let loose and it was like looking at two kids talking about what they wanted to be when they grew up.

Heart-wrenchingly adorable was what it was, Loki mused softly, nodding his head in acquiescence to what Tony said on the possible mutation of the energy of the tesseract now that it wasn’t in its formerly controlled location.

“What do you mean, darling?”

“I mean, I have no desire to become a bumbling oaf like Thor and the rest of these soldiers on the battlefield. I desire not to be cut down where I stand because I followed a plan that was doomed to fail from the start.”

“Loki, this is not a matter up for discussion. You play your part like you are supposed to or so help me, I will—”

He tuned out.

The threats that close to constantly fell from Odin’s lips were paid no mind. Why would he pay attention to a man that couldn’t do much to their own son for doing absolutely nothing wrong?

“Father—”

“This is the strategy we’re going with. When your fight, you fight with honor, not schemes.”

And he was promptly shoved from the room.

He glared at the golden door’s, tamped down the rising rage that made his blood fill with ice and the floor beneath his feet start to cool.

“Brother—there you are!”

Thor’s voice was loud and almost—relieved?

“I have been searching for you everywhere.”

He tried to hide his surprise, succeeded just barely in time as Thor skidded to a stop in front of him, thick arms coming up and enveloping him in a bone crushing hug.

“I am afraid I do not comprehend what is happening. Is something the matter, brother?”

The blonde shook his head, his hold tightening as he pressed his stubble covered cheek against the top of the raven’s head. “Stay by my side today, brother. Please. I can’t—something feels off.”

“With you,” Loki questioned, hands reaching up to push strands of wheat blonde hair aside and look at his brother’s eyes. They seemed darker than normal.

A brusque nod was his response.

“Very well, then, Thor,” he agreed quickly, pulling back and placing a reassuring hand on Thor’s shoulder. He could visibly see the blonde sagging in relief and it worried him. How off must Thor feel to be relieved to have Loki—of all people—at his side during a battle?

Turns out, something was off, and as Loki struggled to keep the binds of magic around his brother, struggled to keep his voice calm as the blonde writhed and roared in his binds, he thanked the Norns that the blonde had the foresight to keep him close.

“Thor, listen to me—listen to me.”

He tightened the bindings as he stepped closer. Storming blue eyes focused on him, teeth bared. It was a feral look, primal, hungry, and Loki swallowed before taking another step closer.

“Thor, listen to my voice.”

He crouched, heard the roiling of thunder as rain pounded down on his back and washed away the blood and grime staining both of their faces and he reached a pale hand out, dodging Thor’s teeth that tried to clamp down on his wrist.

Animalistic, beastly—

Berserk…

“Calm down,” Loki soothed as he finally got his hand on Thor’s head and ran his fingers through the wet locks, fingers undoing the braids, easing tangles and he pulled his magic back to him. He was tired.

Odin’s plan had been dangerous and had failed, even more extremely than Loki had guessed.

There were far more deaths on both sides that was necessary and then Thor had lost control and the amount tripled.

Powerful hands lashed out and grabbed at his sides, fingers pressing painfully into his ribs, but Loki continued stroking wet hair, kept whispering about mindless things, talking about how he loved it whenever it rained because it reminded him of Thor—mentioned that one time when they were kids and Thor crawled into Loki’s room to sleep with him ‘just in case the storm scares you’.

The pressure increased, he was almost certain his heard a crack or two and then Thor’s eyes cleared up from the clouded haze they were in, widening at the sight of his brother clutched tightly in his arms. His fingers lessened, but Loki could tell Thor felt the shifting of broken bone because horror crossed his face and the rain pounded down harder.

“Are you calm now, Thor?”

The blonde stared at him, eyes wide; mouth slightly agape before curling his arms gently around the raven and tugging him close. “I’m calm, I’m calm.”

The words were repeated like a mantra—as if Thor thought that if he said it enough, Loki wouldn’t go.

Loki didn’t leave, though.

He never could.

“Man of Iron and Banner, where are you headed?” A booming voice from behind called and Loki didn’t think twice about pulling his seidr around him and shrouding himself from sight.

“Point-break,” Tony called in greeting as the thunder god walked up to them and Loki stepped back, slowly moving away from the group. “We were heading to get something to eat with agent,” he paused, wide brown eyes looking about, “over here. Bruce, where did he go?”

The doctor scanned their surroundings eyes wide and curious before shrugging his shoulders, brow furrowed. “I don’t,” Bruce stumbled backwards as agents rushed by, shouting for someone to get some liquid nitrogen, “know—what’s going on?”

Tony frowned, fingers curling as a shudder ran down his spine. “I have no idea.”

So, when he teleported away, he once more was only thinking of somewhere safe, somewhere on the helicarrier that was safe.

Unfortunately, that was his mistake because he ended up in one of the rooms on the helicarrier, which was fine, until he realized he wasn’t alone.

In regular circumstances, he would have gotten out of there, fled, but that had been too close and he was so not mentally prepared for that storm and the panic was rapidly settling in and there was no way he was stable enough to teleport once more. In this state, he’d probably teleport different body parts into different locations, or maybe he’d end up leaving his spine in the room and teleport to Coulson and promptly die without the support of his backbone.

It was unlikely any good would come of it.

So when the good captain crouched down next to him, asking if he was fine, what he needed, he managed to rasp out a weak “LN2” before he was busy trying to claw enough air into his lungs. He heard the blonde run to the door and shout for someone to get him some liquid nitrogen before rushing back to Loki’s side.

It was a relief that the captain didn’t question the odd request.

“Agent—agent, can you hear me?”

Steve was gripping his shoulders tight, holding him close, trying not to move him too much, but Loki couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t move. The cold fingers of panic and anxiety wrapped around his throat and squeezed.

He could hear Steve chanting a soft, panicked ‘oh god, oh god, oh god’ above him and the steady stream of noise brought him back from the brink long enough that when the agent burst in to toss a syringe full of the familiar substance, Loki managed to catch it and stab it into his arm, let the icy liquid fill his bloodstream and fell limp onto his side.

Steve’s ‘oh god’s’ got louder as he fumbled above Loki’s still form, pulling out the needle and tossing it aside before fingering his pulse. “Isn’t this stuff poisonous? Oh my god, I just killed a man. Oh my god—agent, talk to me. Say something. Oh Jesus, by the love of god, are you alright?”

Maybe if he had been a bit more aware, he wouldn’t have laughed over the captain’s concern because he could only imagine what this looked like. A man appearing out of nowhere and then injecting himself with liquid nitrogen—this probably looked pretty damn bad.

“Close the door and call Director Fury.”

“Right—okay—oh god.”

The ensuing conversation sure was something. Steve had dutifully listened, face straight once Fury clarified that ‘no, Agent U235 will not be dying’. Apparently he had only needed the assurance of that before he began questioning nearly everything that happened.

Fury’s explanation was brief and to the point.

“What you just experienced was a panic attack. I’m sure a lot of soldiers used to get those before and after the war.”

Steve nodded.

“Agent here has endured some emotional trauma during his childhood. A recent situation has reversed the progress he had made on overcoming them.”

And then who he was began to be explained and Loki merely slouched next to Steve as the nitrogen was swept out of his system.

He didn’t need to hear this—he already knew this, obviously.

So, with the time now offered, he let himself slip into his thoughts, take time to finally process all this. All he had needed this entire time was just a moment to get his mind together, to truly and wholly take this all in.

Thor was here.

Asgard would know where he was soon.

Amora was loose on Midgard.

Amora had the Tesseract.

He had used three syringes of liquid nitrogen today.

He had suffered two panic attacks today.

Captain America now knew who he was.

Inhaling shakily, he pressed his fingertips together, lips pursing and mind whirring. He was safe, though. Coulson was right. Thor couldn’t take from him anything he didn’t let him. He just had to calm down and get his bearings. That was all.

Thor didn’t know he was here yet.

He couldn’t run away next time.

He needed to face this.

Ice prickled at his fingers as the lingering effects of the nitrogen finally ebbed away. Breathing slowly, he let the tips of his fingers turn blue, right where they were pressing together. A stream of air escaped his nostrils as his head tilted downwards.

He had to face this.

Thor was just a person.

A god to the mortals, but to Loki he was just a person.

Besides—it’s not like his feelings were a secret to Thor anymore.

Except for they were because Thor was an oaf and probably hadn’t seen the situation at all like Loki had that year and a half ago.

The situation just seemed to want to string itself into a more complicated mess than it actually was.

“Loki—as in like from where Thor’s from? He’s Thor’s brother?”

Director Fury nodded.

“I just injected Thor’s brother with liquid nitrogen. Okay,” the blonde breathed out slowly, rocking up onto his feet, “I think I need to lie down for a bit.”

And then the captain fell forward.

“I think that’s an information overload for someone from the twentieth century, Director,” Loki softly mused, looking at the fallen blonde before tugging himself to his feet as well. “I’ll take care of him.”

So, he might have lied. He had honestly no idea how to take care of an unconscious super soldier who had just gotten an information overload. After getting the Captain onto a transfigured bed, he took care of him like he would Natasha or Clint and hoped it was fine.

Did super soldiers have different needs?

Probably not, he concluded as he settled down on the floor next to the blonde to start a silent vigil till the man woke up. He probably needed a moment. He knew he would if that had been him.

Watching the unconscious man, though, Loki couldn’t help but remember the time he had taken care of Natasha. It had been completely silent while he fixed her suit. The first time he had met Natasha, the first member of his family on Midgard.

He wouldn’t lose them—he couldn’t lose them.

He didn’t want to start over again, didn’t want to live in a world where he was just the brother of Thor to people, the lost son of the Asgardian realm.

Loki had probably been lost in his thoughts too long because there was a sudden heavy hand on top of his head and when he looked up it was to see a newly conscious Steve Rogers looking down at him with a slightly furrowed brow.

“Chin up, soldier.”

It was odd, probably something Steve said to the Howling Commandos if memory on the man’s report served him right. However, that one simple line seemed to somehow brighten Loki’s entire day.

When they flounced into the cafeteria—well, Clint flounced, Natasha walked; like a regular human being—they had both been expecting to at least see Loki. What they encountered was a scientist, a billionaire, a god, and a very tired looking Coulson.

There were other agents scattered about, but no Loki and a frown instantly pulled on Natasha’s face. Clint seemed just as confused and slightly upset as they walked over to Coulson, one on either side of him, bodies tilted inward as if to signalize that the conversation was exclusively for them.

“How’s everyone doing?” Clint called as he walked over to the table, grabbing a bag of chips from the rack on the way and plopping himself down on the bench next to a certain Asgardian god. Natasha’s eyes narrowed, but as she stalked over, she noticed the slightest twitching of the agents fingers as he fingered through his chips, the slight dip where he chewed the inside of his cheek.

Slinking over, she slipped into the seat next to him as Stark began talking about how the energy of the tesseract should be easily tracked after the adjustments Bruce and he had made and then his rant turned over to the captain and then to the director and then to SHIELD in general.

“And then that agent from before—what was his name?”

“Agent U235,” Banner supplied, taking a bite from his ham sandwich as Clint straightened almost imperceptibly.

“Who is this agent you speak of?” Thor questioned and really; she could finally understand what Loki had meant whenever he described the blonde’s voice as booming.

“You Midgardian people call him the god of thunder.”

“Is he not?” Natasha looked up from where she was curled up against the raven’s chest as his fingers halted in her hair as he tilted his head down to look at her with a slightly raised brow and a kind smile. It was what she enjoyed about the raven. His kindness was near unparalleled.

“No, he is, very much so. His voice booms like thunder, as well. I remember I used to know he was coming in my direction even when he was on the other side of the castle. Absolutely useless on stealth missions, he was.” A weak laugh left him and when she tilted her head up again to look at him, she saw the faraway look in those green emeralds, the way his lips were pulled in a smile, but the corners turned down in sadness.

There was always a certain fondness and grief in the god’s eyes whenever he spoke of his adopted brother.

“How can a voice sound like thunder?”

“I don’t particularly know. Why don’t you ask him?”

She blinked in confusion and he laughed, chest vibrating with the soft sound as he carded slender fingers through his hair with a warm grin. “Eventually you will probably meet him. Asgard will eventually find me.”

She snorted delicately, folding into his embrace a bit more.

“Well, when they do, we’ll be there to greet them with McNuggets and a ‘please leave’ card.”

“Please tell me you actually got my McNuggets, though,” Natasha warned and he laughed, shaking his head.

“Nope, sorry; I stopped at Wendy’s instead. Ran into it first on the way back here; I got you a lot of nuggets, though.”

The red-head sighed, but smiled as she slowly straightened, reluctantly leaving the complicated cool warmth of Loki’s arms. “Come on, Lo; time to eat.”

“He was the guy helping us in the lab, though he didn’t do much other than lurk there. We hardly noticed he was there except for when Tony happened to be standing there and we saw him.”

Thor’s brow furrowed in confusion and then his lips pressed tight, eyes darkening slightly as if he had just remembered something.

“What’s wrong, point-break?”

The blonde jerked, shook his head and smiled at them as if he hadn’t just suddenly gone all morose on them. Natasha could see the appeal in him. At least she knew Loki didn’t have shabby taste in men.

“Nothing; it just reminded me a bit of my brother.”

Bruce cocked a brow. “Your brother?”

“Yes—he was a trickster of sorts; had a knack for making himself unnoticeable.”

Natasha grimaced and resisted the urge to hiss that ‘maybe Loki didn’t make himself invisible—maybe people just made him seem invisible’.

“He left a few days back.”

Clint had to grab her hand to keep her from lunging across him and strangling the god of thunder as he flashed another bright smile at those around him.