The Secret Visit
The echoing of her footsteps bounced off the walls of the narrowed tunnels. The flames flickering in the sconces as she passed by, her pace brisk and purposeful.
She turned another corner, whereupon she saw a burly guard at his post. As she approached him she removed the hood of her cloak, revealing her identity to him.
The guard stammered as he addressed her, a clear indication of his surprise in seeing her here,
"My, my Lady..how can I-"
Sif held up a hand to silence his questioning,
"I have come to see the prisoner"
The guard blinked and looked uncertain.
"Kindly let me pass"
She instructed.
"But, but Lady Sif the Allfather clearly stated that no one is to visit this prisoner."
Sif took a deep breath before she spoke again, she was not at ease with having to lie in order to gain access to the man she sought out but desperation spurred her on.
"I am aware of the Allfather's wishes. However it is Odin himself who has sent me here."
The guard was visibly even more confused but thankfully he moved away from the door where he'd been keeping vigil,
"Oh, well..in that case My Lady.."
Sif breathed a sigh of relief as he fumbled with the keys on his belt.
Clearly security here was far too lax, she found herself thinking. If the gaurds could be so easily fooled into disobeying Odin's strictest of orders. Still, right now she was grateful for it.
At last the heavy door creaked open and hesitantly Sif stepped into the small space. Her eyes took a while to adjust to this dimly lit cell, only a small single candle burned in the corner.
It was then she became aware of the dark figure clad entirely in black, sat on the floor in the corner. It didn't move or make a sound and for a moment Sif wondered if he was in fact still alive. She took a small step closer, before finally uttering the name she hadn't spoken for so long...
"Loki?"
Another moment passed before the figure slowly began to raise it's head. She wasn't sure of what to expect, having not seen him for such a long time, but as her eyes fell on his ghostly pale face, sunken eyes and demonic glare the breath caught in her throat.
His hair had grown longer from when she had last seen him, his raven locks now flicked out where it touched his shoulders. The blackness of his clothing and hair in the dark room accentuated his pale complexion.
Did he not recognise her? She couldn't understand why he remained so silent and impassive.
She cleared her throat and tried again
"Loki..it is I Sif"
Still nothing, not a murmur passed his lips.
"Loki why do you not speak?"
Slowly he lowered his head back to the stone floor, causing Sif great irritation.
"Do not ignore me trickster. You at least owe me an explanation!"
At that Loki's head snapped up again, his eyes burning into hers, and his jaw set tight.
For a moment Sif felt as if this wasn't Loki at all, she could not recall ever seeing him look at her with such pure animosity before.
Finally he spoke, his usually smooth voice nothing more than a low growl,
"I know it is you. I've not completely lost my wits. However I fail to see why you seem to believe that I owe you anything!"
Sif was furious at this,
"Well I knew an apology would be too much to ask for but an explanation as to why you purposefully tried to destroy us-"
"Us?"
He interrupted, looking blankly at her.
"Yes us....myself, Fandral, Volstagg and Hogun...as well as Thor..."
Loki bristled openly at the mention of the Thunderer's name. Sif ignored it and persisted,
"Why would you do such a thing? You sent the destroyer to kill us all, even your own brother!"
Suddenly he was on his feet, towering over her, his face merely inches away from her own,
"He is not my brother!"
He spat angrily.
Sif was suddenly gripped by panic, his movements had been too quick for her to even register. She swallowed hard, and shakily tried to stand her ground,
"You still tried to kill us.....why would you do that?"
"You acted as traitors, you defied the orders of your King!"
She could feel the coolness of his breath on her, instinctively she backed away slowly.
"You betrayed me, for him!"
He was saying now.
Sif frowned,
"We could not just leave him alone on Midgard, powerless.."
"Oh but he wasn't alone, was he Sif?"
He jibed. He was smiling now, but not a warm genuine smile. It was a sneer, a vindictive smirk.
"He had his midgardian woman to keep him company. Your betrothed was busy courting a mortal. Yet still you ran to him!"
Sif closed her eyes to shut out his sneering expression,
"I did not go running to him....it is Thor's business whom he.."
She faltered slightly,
"...I mean I cannot expect him to feel for me when it is not his choice to be betrothed to me. We live separate lives and our betrothal only still stands as it is not for us to question the Allfather's bidding."
Loki began to laugh, a mocking laugh. He looked for a moment as if he almost pitied her. This angered her greatly.
"Nothing you speak of explains your actions Loki!"
she pointed out.
Loki looked bored now, as if he could no longer be bothered with the conversation. But after a lengthy pause he replied,
"You would think that Sif!"
He hissed,
"You have always had a habit of being blind to what is around you."
Sif frowned at his proclamation. She didn't understand, and she was about to question him again when he supplied the explanation for her as if he had read her thoughts,
"Surely you have learnt that every action has a reaction, to which there is then a consequence?"
"So you are telling me that because we went to Midgard to find Thor you tried to destroy us?"
He had turned away from her now and was walking back to his preferred corner,
"This has nothing to do with those other fools! You came for an explanation, you alone....it is your actions I am speaking of not theirs!"
"Alright, so it is because I disobeyed your command when you took the throne-"
"It was my birthright!"
He yelled in anguish, making Sif physically jump
"My mother was in attendance when I was presented Gungnir, she reminded me that the line of succession fell to me. I did not usurp Odin. I was merely doing my duty for Asgard. But you wouldn't think of that would you? You who have always sought to make me the villain and less of a man than the mighty Thor!"
Sif could not believe what he was saying, his words completely baffled her.
"Loki, you have always been envious of your br- I mean Thor.."
she corrected quickly,
"Why am I to blame for that?"
Loki turned and gave her a meaningful look over his shoulder,
"As I said before, you have always been blind to what unfolds around you. I am saying no more. Now leave me be."
He slumped back down into the corner, as if exhausted by his own emotions. He hung his head and she could hear his breath coming in short, shallow gasps.
It was then that Sif took notice for the first time, the squalid conditions of this 'hidden' cell. Unlike the others in the main prison complex, it was cold in here, dark and the air seemed almost thin.
She had previously noted the bruises and scars on his face when he'd been close up to her. He most definitely needed a treatment session in the healing rooms. It was clear now she looked closely at him that he really wasn't well. Physically and possibly mentally too.
His mind was unbalanced, his actions on Asgard and then more recently on Midgard were not that of someone in their right mind. She should feel pity for him and forgive his past acts of lunacy.
For some reason she found herself walking towards his slumped form, and crouched down beside him,
"Loki you are unwell. Is there anything I can do to help ease your discomfort?"
She spoke gently.
Slowly he looked up at her, his expression different again. This time he looked sad, his orphans' eyes held a vulnerability in them that made him look almost lost.
"I am quite well thank you. I need nothing..."
He paused briefly for affect before adding quite poignantly
"....from you."
Sif couldn't quite explain why this hurt her feelings like it did. Loki was nothing to her.
Then she realised, is that what he was trying to point out?
"Loki, why speak so aggressively towards me? I am merely trying to-"
"What Sif, comfort me?"
He cut in abruptly, his expression changing again. He now looked offended and defensive
"I do not need your pity Lady Sif. I would much rather you vent the anger you feel towards me, and be on your way."
Exasperated she made to stand, when suddenly he reached out and caught her firmly by the hand,
"Have you not listened to a word I've said? You came here for an explanation, I've given it to you so it is not my fault if you cannot comprehend it!"
His touch was alarmingly cold and he pulled her closer towards him, making her gasp,
"You stated earlier that it is not for us to question the great Odin's bidding, yet you disobey him by coming here to question me. You seem to make a habit of disobeying the orders of King's!"
Sif was gasping for breath now, her arm caught in his vice-like grip, which held her close to him. She knew she could attempt to fight free but something deep within made her powerless against him.
"So you came seeking answers..."
He continued to rant,
"...well I shall have to assist you being as you are blind to the truth!"
He reached up with his other hand and placed his fingertips on her forehead. As before his touch was cold, but then a warmth began radiating across her brow, and suddenly she began to feel dizzy.
"What are you doing? Stop it!"
She protested and pulled away from his touch.
He let her free of his grasp.
"I am merely helping you to understand what it is you so desperately wish to know."
He said calmly.
Sif blinked, suddenly feeling tired and very confused.
As if knowing this Loki called out,
"Guard, the Lady is done here!"
The door creaked open and the guard stood waiting for her to leave.
In a daze she turned back to look at Loki one last time. He stared back at her, and for a moment it was as if she could hear his voice, softly speaking inside her head...
"Do not fear me Sif....I would never truly intend to harm you."