What You Want
“Bucky, it’s been 12 days since we all seen you.” The voice continues to knock on Bucky’s door. “At this point, we don’t know if you’re sulking or dead, so can you please open the door?” Bucky groans as he gets out of bed and opens the door
“What do you want?” Bucky mutters when he opens the door. Dum Dum, Gabe, Jim, James, and Jacques all look at Bucky outside his door. He knows they’re trying to help, but he doesn’t want their help. He’s perfectly fine.
“Wow, you look like shit.” Jim says. Gabe smacks him in the back of the head.
“We want to help you. You can’t be stuck in there for the rest of your life.” Dum Dum implies. Bucky just rolls his eyes. He feels bad for being mean, but he just can’t help himself. Bucky’s life was over, so why care? Everything was useless.
“Why not? I’m perfectly happy staying in my room. It’s cozy.” Bucky frowns into his words.
“Listen Bucky, we all know that’s bullshit. Come on, you need to get fresh air. That room is filled with sadness, it’s not healthy.” Dum Dum grabs Bucky’s wrists and drags him down the stairs, despite Bucky’s protests. As soon as they get down to the living room, Bucky flops down onto the couch, face first, groaning.
“Dude, get up.”
“No.”
“Bucky, I swear to fuck.”
“No. I refuse.”
“Fine you know what? Suit yourself. Smother yourself by the couch.” Yes, Bucky knows he’s acting childish, but he just can’t help it. Everything sucked. He didn’t want to face the real world.
The TV plays a news gossip show in the background “Ryan Rumlow just married Muffy Vandervile this weekend. Their wedding was classy with their-.” Bucky immediately perks up from his previous sulk.
“That’s Brock’s older brother. I meet Muffy, she’s a lawyer.” The thought sinks into Bucky’s mind. “This is someone Brock wants. Someone... serious. A lawyer. Someone who wears all black suits when no one is dead.”
An idea suddenly pops into Bucky’s head. Automatically, for the first time in a while hope seems to appear. Maybe it’s a crazy idea, but at this point, things can’t get worse, right?
“If Brock wants some “serious”, then I will fucking become serious. Brock obviously loves me, but he needs to see me in a new light. That I’m not just shopping, parties, and body shots. I can be smart and serious. I mean I’m the totally package, all I need now is the brains. All I need to do is to get accepted to Harvard Law and he’ll actually propose and we'll finally get married!” Bucky shots up with excitement and newly found ambition.
“Oh shit. Wait woah, calm down Bucky. You wanna got to Harvard Law School?” James speaks up with a worried tone.
“Well yeah! I have a 4.0 GPA.” Bucky says nonchalantly. It’s a total full proof plan.
“Sure you do, but in fashion merchandising. I doubt knowing the difference between Valentino and Gucci will help you in law school. What makes you think you can realistically accomplish this?” James says
“Anything can be possible in the name of love.” Bucky points out. He might be a tad delusional but if Bucky wants it, Bucky always gets it. There’s no way he’s going to back out, over a minor hiccup.
“Dude, it’s not going to be easy to get in, you know that right? No more going out to parties. You’re going to need to do a lot of work by even getting a chance to be considered to get accepted. For starters, you need an LSAT score of over 174, letters of recommendations, and a personal essay on describing why you should be accepted to Harvard.” Jacques adds.
Okay yes, that sounds like tons of work, but Brock is worth it. He’s everything to Bucky. He can’t lose him over a smidge personality flaw. It’s what Bucky wants.
*
“You want to go to Law school? Jesus fuck. Law school is for sad, boring, ugly people. Why on earth do you want to go to Harvard? Just stay here. Maybe become an actor or a model. You have my genes, so you obvious are beautiful.” George looks over at Bucky.
“Why don’t you just buy a Rolex watch? You always say shopping takes the pain away, sweetheart.” Winifred adds
“Plus why would you want to go to the east coast anyways? It’s cold, it always rains, and their winters are terrible! What’s at Harvard that’s not here?”
“Brock is, dad. I love Brock; I can’t just let him slip away. I need to prove to him that I’m serious about our relationship. He makes me happy; don’t you want me to be happy?” Bucky looks at both of his parents, praying to God they understand how important it is for him.
“Yeah sure whatever, if you get accepted I’ll pay for you.” George finally gives in.
*
“SPRING BREAK!” Jim yells throughout the house, all the other boys jump up with excitement. Finally, Bucky needs a break from all this studying. Bucky get’s up and rushes into his room, and then he hears a voice.
“Where do you think you’re going, Barnes? Remember, no parties. Go on, back to studying.” Jacques scowls Bucky. He lowers his head is slowly walks back to the table filled with books.
This was the big moment, Bucky’s first LSAT score. He feels extremely confident about it.
“You got 134.” Jacques slams another test down on Bucky’s desk “Not good enough. Try again. Starting now.”
Okay, this time, Bucky has it in the bag. Perfect score probably. He can feel it.
“151. Still not Harvard material. Try harder, you dip shit. You can do this. Do it again. Go.”
Oh god. Bucky failed it. He did awful, he knew it. How could he think he could get into Harvard? Bucky is a failure that’s going to die alone. He tried so hard for the love of his life, but he obviously can’t even take a fucking test right without failing it.
“Bucky! You did it! 179! That’s great!” Jacques comes in, smiling cheek to cheek.
“Wait really? Please tell me you’re not fucking with me. My heart can’t take it.” Buck says, immediately snapped out of his depressing thoughts. His hearts to begin to swell with hope.
“Yes!”
*
When Bucky opened his acceptance letter, he cried and screamed. Happy tears.
*
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