Thranduil / Reader (13)
Deep in the Mirkwood forest, there was a forest lake, a lake that looked from afar like any other, but hid a secret like no other. The water in the lake was crystal clear, so clear in fact that it looked unnaturally blue compared to the other forest lakes in the Woodland Realm; in other ponds the water was murky from debris from the surrounding forest but in this one nothing ever decayed or faded away. The lake was surrounded from one side by steep wall of rock that was partially covered with deep green moss and other types of plants such as vines and white flowers that glowed in twilight. The lake was enclosed by tall trees that stretched out their massive roots into the lake almost as if they had been hungry for the life force that resided in the water. The wild, overgrown nature hid the lake from curious eyes, making it hard to reach… yet one narrow pathway remained. It led to a beach of small white stones that were round and smooth, soft under bare feet, inviting to take a swim. The water in the lake was always refreshingly cool and therefore the place was perfect spot to spend a hot afternoon in the summer. The pathway, winding and not wide at all, was paved with the white stones, leading to the beach and further into the lake. Almost as if it was calling people and filling their minds with comfort as well as curiosity; look, come closer… take a swim… dive a little deeper… reach the bottom and…
There was a secret world, a realm within a realm, right beneath the surface of that small forest lake. The lake, more like a pond though, not deeper than seven meters at the deepest point, yet when one dived below few and tried to reach the bottom that was covered with the white smooth, round stones, sparkling in the sunshine like starlight gems under colorful, fallen leafs, one suddenly found themselves at the doorstep of another world; a dangerous world where beautiful, yet deadly creatures lived. The water spirits, some called them sirens, never crossed this border, it was forbidden because they couldn’t exist in the world of the mortals, like a single drop of water couldn’t take the heat of the afternoon sun. The water spirits existed in their world without caring about the events of the world above… but sometimes they sang their songs and lured people who were completely unaware of the lurking danger, into their hidden realm, never to be seen again.
When the border between the words was crossed, it was nearly impossible to get back to the surface; anyone who dived that deep found themselves in the middle of blue vastness, a lake without a bottom, the shore that had been there just a moment ago fading away and leaving the person floating seemingly alone as water plants swayed in the middle of the glowing world of eerie melodies, whispers and aquamarine. Some of them would panic and try to swim back to the surface, but get so badly confused that instead of swimming up, they swam down to meet their end and some surrendered themselves willingly to the otherworldly beings. Mesmerized, hypnotized and profoundly fascinated, reaching out to the sirens and did not resist the kiss that filled their lungs with water and sealed their fate. The sirens claimed these poor souls, trapping them beneath the waves into their realm where they would haunt the waters without a physical form until the end of time. Their bodies kept sinking down forever and ever until they reached the bottom covered with smooth, white stones and settled on top of corpses – the corpses of people that had been tricked to dive too deep before. Their bodies never rot, but remained, like they had been just sleeping, but still… they were dead.
The sirens, ageless and not bound by time, had always been there, coexisting with the creatures of Middle Earth in their own endless world that was filled with mysteries and tragedy even though the sirens did not feel grief. No, they did not really feel anything, neither love nor hate, they were one with the water like the elves were one with the forest, but they were nothing alike. The sirens couldn’t be seen, they couldn’t be felt, if one tried to grab one, it was like grabbing air or water, since they had no real physical form, no feelings… no thoughts, no dreams or plans. Only at the moment of death they showed themselves to the unfortunate person who had dived too deep. It was at the final second, as their lungs filled with water from the siren’s kiss, they were able to see a crowd of ghostly beings floating motionlessly around him or her, just waiting and staring with their glowing turquoise eyes.
The sirens wore no gowns or garments of any kind, they swam and floated in their borderless realm freely, their long hair swaying in the water and their figures humanlike, although they did not have bodies, just… shapes and forms. Their skin looked translucent and it glimmered like when sunlight touches the bottom of the lake that is covered with white, smooth stones. Their voices echoed all around in water and filled the mind of any creature from the world above once they had crossed the border between these two worlds. Then one could hear them, singing… calling… urging them to dive deeper, just a little deeper into the glowing blue that had its own sound and atmosphere like any other place that existed, even though one might have assumed that the borderless and bottomless ocean would be silent and have no ambiance at all.
The world beneath sounded similar to a big hall made of stone, it had the same feel, the same texture – you were able to hear the eerie vastness of the place. It was like there had been wind constantly humming in the background, or subtle roar of waves, low rumble, like when you press a seashell against your ear. The world below was breathing, vibrating, pulsating… it was alive. The voices of the water spirits, sounding similar to delicate flutes, echoed there but not in the way when you shout in a forest and your voice returns to you as an echo, oh no, this echo was an echo of a place without boundaries, more like… a feeling, remaining yet constantly changing while staying the same.
You were one of these sirens, you had always been one… or perhaps you had just forgotten everything that had been before. You sang your songs as you floated weightlessly in the clear, cool water, sometimes swimming to the border to stare at the rays of the sun, never close enough for them to actually caress your face, and then you let yourself to sink down into the darkness. Sometimes you witnessed random travelers diving too deep into the lake and crossing the border between the world above and the world below. You saw the water spirits gathering around this person, the sirens singing their songs until he or she gasped for air and their lungs filled with water. A new siren was born and the body sank lifelessly to the bottom of the bottomless ocean. You had never claimed anyone’s soul and seeing it happen made you feel… sad.
One summer day when you were floating as close as the surface as you could, just few meters below the surface, you felt the water stir and saw an elf swimming in the lake. You took notice of him immediately because he was surrounded by an aura of grace and control, an old elf, probably noble by birth and highly respected due to his actions and deeds. The elf was tall and quite muscular for an elf, his shoulders as well as chest were broad, he looked very strong yet delicate, dangerous and safe at the same time. His arms and legs were long but perfectly proportioned to his body and the two dimples on his lower back, on the both sides of his spine, made his backside look very attractive, like had been sculptured by the finest artist. He had long blonde hair that shimmered in the sunshine and floated all over when he dived into the clear blue water, almost like it had been made of rays of moonlight and silver, weaved together by some greater power, carefully forming this magical, ethereal being. This elf had ice blue eyes that were framed with long, dark eyelashes and fair, light complexion. He looked old, but not in the way of the mortal beings like humans but in the way of the elves who only got more beautiful as they got older. His eyes were filled with hidden grief and mysteries, wisdom and longing.
The elf had impressive eyebrows as well as beautiful pointy ears and the way he moved in the water… it was… magical. He dived few times, never getting astray too deep, but momentarily you were so close to this beautiful creature that if you had reached out… you might have been able to touch him. You stared at him from a distance that was less than two meters while he held his breath and enjoyed being submerged in the refreshing, rejuvenating water, his eyes closed, just floating there like you, weightless. Then he opened his eyes and stared right at you.
No, sadly no. He was staring right through you because he couldn’t see you, even though for a moment it felt like he had sensed your presence, like he had known that you were near. Then he kicked few times and returned back to the surface, leaving you mesmerized and stirring something inside you. The elf swam to the shore, got out from the water and lay down on the white rocks so the sunshine combined with the warm, gentle breeze could dry his delicate skin before getting dressed. You followed the man from a distance, the water distorting the image of him but you did not care; you just needed one more glimpse of him, just one more look of his beautiful face and then you would sink down again, to join your kind in the eerie twilight that was always a bit too far for the rays of sun to reach, like a word on the tip of your tongue… right there… but not quite there enough.
The tall, handsome elf started to visit this forest lake quite regularly, sometimes just dipping his toes into the water, letting it heal the injuries as well as soothe the aches and sometimes he spent entire afternoons just swimming and diving in the pond, never getting too deep almost like he had known how dangerous it could… or would be. However your favorite time was when he came to you at night, to swim in the lake in the silver moonlight with millions of stars twinkling above and elf glowing and bringing light into your dark world. The sight was so majestic and beautiful that it was nothing you had ever seen before. Nearly too much to take; if you had had a heart, it would have burst for sure.
You found yourself waiting at the border of these worlds almost every day, even though he did not come daily, oh no, sometimes it took weeks and this not-knowing if you were going to see him ever again was killing you slowly from inside… or it would have, if you had been alive in the first place. You kept growing slowly more and more desperate with your feelings as the years passed despite the fact that sirens did not normally feel anything. Yes, you had started to feel something for this elf and therefore every winter was nothing but sheer torture for you because it was the time when the lake froze over and you knew that it would be many months until the next time you would see the elf again.
Those slow, silent months you cried, your tears burning your cheeks and sinking down into the freezing cold darkness like pearls as you waited for the spring to arrive. You swam to the surface, even though it was forbidden and felt the ice with your fingertips. During the first days of the winter you stared through the ice at the sky that slowly filled with gray clouds. It would snow soon and you would be completely trapped into the darkness. First there were only few snowflakes covering the clear layer of ice but as the days passed and the world above plunged into the winter, the ice got covered with snow, robbing you from the only window you had. Your only source of light was now gone.
The winters always lasted too long, although you had never noticed this before. Oh no, you had not felt anything before, just existed, but now that you had laid your eyes upon the elf, you had started to feel lonely, desperate and also a bit bitter… especially during the silent winter months when the lake was dormant and forgotten. Then a new spring arrived and you became hopeful again, counting down days until summer and hoping that the elf had not forsaken the lake, that he still remembered it and would soon return.
And he always did, always on the first day of summer, almost as if it had been scheduled, a reunion, even though surely he did not even know that you existed. During the moments when you swam with the elf, yet you always kept your distance, you were happy, the feeling could be described as a sensation of having sunshine caressing your skin for the first time, or what you imagined it to feel like, not that you knew what sunshine even was. It was a thing that you dreamed about now, sunshine and a breeze. Yes, the soft, warm breeze that played with the elf’s hair as he sat on the shore and waited for his skin to dry… you wanted to feel that too, you wanted your hair dance in the wind as you ran on the grass barefoot, across the vast plains, under the stars, side by side with the faintly glowing elf.
Oh, how you longed to leave this place and to have a body… a body that could embrace him, a body that could feel his touch… a body that would enable you to live in the world above. Yes… you wanted to live in the world above, walk in the forest during summer rain, feel the flower petals with your fingertips and sing songs with the birds that lived in the tall trees surrounding the lake. You had loved water, you were one with it, it was you and you were it, but now it was turning into a cage that kept you away from the thing that you had grown to love even more.
“I wish nothing more than to be with you, my love. You’ve captured my mind and now I cannot think anything but you and how our life would be, together, walking under the night sky and listening to the wind rustling in the trees. I would tell you each day how precious you are to me, I would share your hopes and dreams and help you to carry your sorrows when the world turns murky and loses its colors. You’ve freed my soul and now I’m able to feel again… to dream again… to have a purpose, even a life perhaps. I am no longer just a spirit in the water, floating around singing songs while the world above changes. This is not enough. It has never been enough.”
If only you had a chance, you would leave the world below and never return. You would miss water, of course, it was your element after all, but as long as you would get to share a life with the beautiful elf, you would be fine. It would be one tiny sacrifice, a small price to pay for freedom… for love. But you knew that it was impossible, just a foolish dream because no one ever left; after you fell down to the bottom, you would never… leave. It was forbidden to cross the border between the worlds, although you knew it was possible because you had done it many times during the winter. However since you were nothing but a spirit without a physical form, there was no way you would survive on dry land. And if you left, if you crossed that border and left the lake, you would be banished and doomed to fade into mist by the next time the first snow covered the earth. Then you would be trapped between the worlds and haunt the forest until the end of time, completely alone.
“No, it is not the fate that I desire and therefore I’ve decided to abandon this daydream even though it rips my spirit apart and if I had a beating heart, it would break, shatter into thousand little pieces and the pain would kill me for sure. This is the reason, my beautiful stranger, why I’ll leave you. I’ll come to see you once more, on the first day of summer and after I’ve said my goodbyes to you, my love, I’ll sink down, float into the abyss where there is nothing but darkness, freezing cold water and corpses that will never decay. There I shall stay until I’ve forgotten you for good. Please leave my mind, let me be, never return to this lake again… because if you’ll do… I’ll fall in love with you once more and this pain is too much to take twice.”
It was the first day of summer, nearly hundred years after you had seen the elf for the first time. You were swimming in the shallow water, hoping to get the final glimpse of the handsome man before letting yourself to sink down into the motionless depths and remain there until you forgot why you had decided to isolate yourself like that in the first place. Almost as if it had been scheduled, you felt the water move above when the elf dived into the crystal clear blue. He was as beautiful as ever, gliding in the water so gracefully, making no splashes at all unlike many who had bathed in the lake during the years. Then the elf stopped, his eyes fixed on something, but you were not quite sure that that something was. Perhaps he had seen something glimmering in the bottom of the lake, an unclaimed treasure that he would now gladly claim. What a horrible mistake it would be!
The elf took a quick look at his hand and realized that he had lost a ring. He scanned the bottom of the lake and noticed it resting on the white smooth stones in the bottom of the lake. The elf kicked himself to the surface and took a deep breath after which he dived straight down, deeper than ever before as he tried to locate the ring once more. It was one of his favorites and therefore he was most determined that he wouldn’t leave it behind. The elf dived deeper than ever before and reached out his hand when he assumed that he was close enough to grab the precious gem. However he found himself grabbing nothing but water, time after time, despite his best efforts to reach the bottom. It was always a bit out of reach, taunting him, teasing him, challenging him to dive deeper.
“Just a little bit more, you’re almost there.”
Suddenly the elf recoiled from his obsession to retrieve the ring and when he did, he realized that there was no bottom anywhere, no shore at sight and the surface was too far away. He turned back to face the surface, kicked few times but then stopped. The songs, the whispers, they had filled his mind and he was mesmerized. The elf scanned his surroundings as he floated in the vast ocean of clear blue, twilight and aquamarine, taking in the sight and trying to understand what this place was. It made no sense, it was not possible, yet here he was, slowly sinking further down into the dark depths.
He noticed eerie shapes swimming closer from the distance, their glowing turquoise eyes staring at him while waiting for the beautiful elf to gasp for air and fill his lungs with water. This one was resilient, though, unlike the others… but… there was no way he would reach the surface anymore. Oh no, it was only a matter of seconds now. Just wait and sing your songs. The life in his eyes is already passing, soon he will take his final breath and he’ll be trapped here forever. He’ll swim in the twilight and sooner than he’ll know, he has forgotten who he once was and he’ll too think that there is nothing else than this world… the world below.
“You’re swimming too deep, my love. Let it go, don’t try to reach the bottom. Leave it, do it now and you can still swim back to the surface. But no, you cannot hear my warnings, you cannot see me waving at you… you cannot feel me pulling your leg as you dive deeper. Now you’re in my world and it is too late. Oh, why must you be so vain and stubborn! Look around and see the lake disappearing around you and turning into a vast ocean. Stop! Let it go!”
You tried to grab the elf’s leg, first failing miserably as your hand seemed to be unable to hold onto anything tangible. Then suddenly you managed to wrap your hands around his ankle and wake him up from his state of daze. The elf stopped and finally realized that he was not where he assumed to be – in the shallow forest lake, deep in the woods of the Woodland Realm of Mirkwood. Oh no, he was somewhere entirely. You swam right in front of him and stared deep into his gorgeous, yet slightly glassy blue eyes as he stared into yours, or perhaps through you, you were not sure. He kicked few times as he attempted to return to the surface, clearly not ready to surrender to either; to the water spirits or panic, but soon he stopped kicking and the expression on his face changed from determined to mesmerized.
He had heard the sirens’ call and was no longer fighting. You grabbed his shoulders and shook him few times as a frail attempt to wake him up from the hypnoses but it was too late. He saw the water spirits that surrounded him and you, he heard their voices, so comforting and reassuring, singing their songs and luring him to take a deep breath, to let go and to join them. Now he saw you too, his gorgeous eyes drowning into yours, examining your hauntingly beautiful face.
A small smile appeared on his face as he reached out to touch your cheek with his fingertips. The elf traced your delicate features and wiped away the tears that rolled on your cheek and fell down into the abyss like delicate pearls. He leaned closer, closed his eyes and pressed his lips on yours, such soft, warm lips, far better than you had ever dreamed about. You wrapped your arm around him and sank the fingers of your other hand into his silver hair that floated around like rays of moonlight. You closed your eyes and parted your lips, but when he parted his as a reaction, he suddenly gasped as he surrendered to the overwhelming need to breathe. The elf shook violently as water filled his lungs, his hand falling off from your face, no longer cupping your cheek like it had. For a moment, you had been real to him, for a moment… he had… loved you.
“Should I keep you here, my love? Floating eternally in this blue world where there is no time, no seasons, no troubles… but no life either. Would you love me still after you have forgotten who you are… who you once were? Would you be able to feel or would you just become an emotionless spirit like everyone else here? Would I hate myself for my selfishness? Did I cause this? Did I sing to you and you followed me down? Did you know what would happen? Perhaps this was what you truly wanted… Maybe you want to float here with me for an eternity... until the end of time.
Should I keep you here for myself… or should I try to save your life so you can return to the world above and forget about me?”