Loki / Reader (5) - Part 6
- King Loki. you said immediately after stepping away from the swing and turning around to face Loki. Your tone was polite but it was apparent that you were surprised to see Loki. Yes, that you indeed were; you had not expected him to follow you and it raised many questions, one of them being
- What are you doing here? you asked and realized that you had not dropped a curtsy yet, which was a matter that you repaired instantly without any hesitation. You were a lady after all and even when your mind was baffled your upbringing kicked in and all the polite manners, like curtsying for example, came to you naturally, as an automated reaction.
- I heard that you left the court. Loki stated with a neutral yet somewhat thoughtful tone.
- Yes, as you can see I came to see my family. you replied and then added “It has been such a long time since I-“
- You did not even come to say goodbye. Loki said and this time his voice sounded a bit offended. “You just… sneaked out without telling anyone” he continued and stared at you with a puzzled expression in the darkening twilight. You knew he was right; it had not been too polite of you to just leave like that but you did not want to admit to Loki so you just commented
- I told my maid and asked her to forward the messa-
- But you didn’t tell me. Personally. Loki stated and then asked “Didn’t you think I would want you to? Didn’t you think I would care?”
What the hell was that supposed to mean? No, you had not thought that Loki would care because it was pretty obvious that Loki did not like you! Had the God of Mischief forgotten what he had said and done? All the mean words and then… bending you into his will and offending your privacy? You scoffed involuntarily and wiped a runaway tear off your cheek hoping that Loki had not seen it. You however didn’t know what to comment so after a rather long, awkward silence you dropped a curtsy and said “I must announce your arrival to my parents.” You walked to the door that led into the sitting room, Loki following you and just as you were about to step inside, Loki said “I’m sorry-” You froze completely still and held your breath as the words echoed in your mind.
- …for what I have said… for my behavior. Loki continued, staring at your back while standing behind you, a bit further away from you. “Please accept my sincerest apologies” he pleaded with a desperate tone. You gasped for air and fought your emotions to take over; you couldn’t allow yourself to break down now.
- Please, follow me in. you said without glancing at Loki over your shoulder.
- Mother, father… King Loki is here. you said and when Loki had stepped into the dining room where you parents were still eating dinner, you left the room and walked quickly into your own bed chamber. You listened to Loki talking with your parents for some minutes and after that there were footsteps in the corridor, getting closer to the door that led into your bedroom. Then Loki knocked the door softly and asked “May I come in?”
- As you please. you replied and waited Loki to enter your room. He walked in and closed the door behind him.
- Why are you here? you asked with a baffled, slightly shaky voice.
- I came to take you home. Loki replied instantly with a soft, warm voice.
- But I am home. you commented and rolled your eyes involuntarily. You crossed your arms and twisted your injured wrist a little which made you gasp a little. You instantly shifted the position of your hands and rubbed your wrist to soothe the sting with a light massage. You never rubbed your wrist when someone was watching but now you did it without actually realizing it yourself… it was the weather… maybe it was going to rain soon because your wrist, the injury of the wolf-bite always ached the worst before the rain. Loki noticed that you were in pain and asked “Does it hurt?” He walked closer and took your hand, brushed your wrist with his thumb and before he managed to get into your mind to take a look how you had gotten the injury, you pulled your hand away and said “Don’t” with an assertive, cold and slightly threatening voice.
- I miss your… friendship… your company. Loki stated to lift the mood a little bit, to create some kind of connection with you since now you seemed to be just mentally as well as emotionally light years away. “I miss you” Loki admitted with a shy voice.
- I just got here! you snapped and then added “You cannot possibly miss me already.”
- You never came back. Loki said and shook his head.
- I beg your pardon? you scoffed bitterly. At that moment Loki pressed his hand on your heart and the other on your forehead. His actions were so surprising that you froze completely and therefore were unable to react in any way, you couldn’t even step back… although you weren’t even sure if you even wanted to reject the kind gesture.
- There is a wall around your heart and your mind is locked away. Loki spoke with a soft, friendly voice but he still sounded quite sad and disappointed even. A tear rolled to your cheek from the corner of your eye and that was the only reaction that you were able to muster. The sight made Loki’s heart ache, so he moved his hand from your forehead to your neck and cupped your face. He wiped the tear away with his thumb while searching anxiously answers from your sorrow-filled eyes. “I will get that key… I will fix what I have broken” he spoke with great confidence and stepped further away from you because he didn’t want to make you feel pressured, cornered or uncomfortable in any way.
- Take your time. But… come back… when you’re ready. Loki spoke and then added a soft, hopeful “Please.” You nodded with a sorrow-filled smile on your face and watched Loki walking out from your room, listened to the sound of his footsteps getting further away… the door opening and closing and then… he was gone.
After two and half months you returned to the court and from that moment on Loki treated you in a very warm and friendly way. He made sure that you sat close to him during the dinners, asked you on walks with him and through these small gestures he tried to show you constantly that he wanted you in his life. He was always courteous and polite towards you and you could see the change in his attitude; he didn’t assume to know what was best for you and he trusted you to make your own decisions… it was something that he had struggled with before. He also stopped the rumors by telling the people to “get a life” and defended you when he heard someone talking ill about you.
However Loki constantly battled with his jealousy because he assumed that you loved the innkeeper… that your heart was taken by someone else. He wanted to make you forget the mortal man and encourage you to fall in love with the king instead but what he didn’t realize was that you were not in love with the innkeeper and your feelings for Loki had never died… you had just learned to hide them well… so well in fact that sometimes even you forgot that they existed… especially because you kept avoiding smiles and long looks… all those small things that had made you fall in love with Loki in the first place… and his laughter… yes, one thing that you tried now to avoid.
You were fairly happy in the court and eventually your heart started to heal as well… slowly but surely. You enjoyed spending time with Loki who was clearly trying to make amends and fix things between you and him… but still you couldn’t let him close; it was not that easy to trust him as unconditionally as you had before and the other thing was that you were unconsciously worried about making a fool of yourself once more and therefore you kept your reactions and behavior as subtle and well-mannered as you possibly could… which made you appear quite lifeless compared to the person you had been before shit had hit the fan.
This made Loki a bit sad although he never pointed it out to you. He was worried that he had hurt you so deeply that the damage couldn’t be repaired even though Loki was constantly trying to fix the friendship that he shared with you. The God of Mischief wanted you to be happy but despite his best efforts, he couldn’t make you smile… not genuinely at least… which led him to believe that you were still in love with the innkeeper and missed him… and as a result Loki tried even harder to impress you… to make you fall in love with him.
You appreciated Loki’s efforts of course although you didn’t know why he was doing it. It puzzled you profoundly and finally you came to a conclusion that Loki really wanted to be your friend and was truly apologetic for the things he had said and done. It has been almost a year already since he had snapped at you… so maybe it was time to let it go and move on… and to truly move on meant that you had to forgive Loki and open your heart to him; if he wanted to be your friend… especially now that he had been kind towards you and you could feel that his kindness was sincere and came from his heart… you started to run out of the reasons why you should keep your distance to the king.
It had been exactly five years since you had been lost in the forest and during this time of the year... every time there was a chilly wind blowing from the mountains your thoughts got astray from their usual paths and you found yourself pondering around your struggles… especially because the humid wind made your injured wrist ache a little, reminding you that it most likely would never heal perfectly. This very evening Loki had organized a party to celebrate friendships but the real reason for the party was that he had noticed that you got always a little melancholic when the anniversary of your ordeal approached and this time he had wanted to distract you from the painful memories.
It was a beautiful evening, a wonderful party with plenty of dancing and good food as well as beverages. You had gotten a gorgeous gown, made of the finest silk and decorated with small gemstone beads as a present from Loki just a couple of days before today and you were wearing the dress now with precious jewelries that you had gotten from him a year ago. Your heart had finally healed entirely and if the timing of the party had been any other you would have been looking forward to dancing with Loki… but since it wasn’t… you didn’t really feel like partying… not tonight.
You honored the king of course by attending the celebration and hiding your melancholic mood like a fine lady should but when it started to get late and you got slightly tired, you found yourself getting some fresh air in the garden almost constantly… just to hide the fact that your mood was not as cheerful as one expected it to be. You liked parties very much but this time there had been rumors in the court that the king had thrown the party in your honor… or… more specifically... for you… and this normally would have made your heart burst from joy, taking in to consideration that you were still secretly in love with the king… but today your heart was filled with hidden sorrow.
- Shouldn’t you be inside? you asked you when you heard the familiar footsteps getting nearer behind you; it was Loki who was walking deeper into the garden, to join you in the darkness.
Loki had been looking for you because he wanted to dance with you but for his disappointment no one had seen you for a while, hence your constant breaks for fresh air outside the palace. Yes, tonight you felt like there was no air in the crowded room and no amount of alcohol great enough to make you feel pleasantly intoxicated… so you had decided not to drink at all. Anyway, after basically searching everywhere for you in the palace Loki finally had shifted his attention to the garden; the last place where he had not looked… yet.
When Loki had walked into the garden he had seen you standing alone in the darkness, staring at the sky and hiding away from the world. He had been watching you secretly for a moment before walking to you and tried to read your mood so he would not upset you even by an accident. You however knew that Loki had been standing in the shadows for at least five minutes because could have recognized Loki’s presence anywhere… the presence that made you feel nowadays calm, safe and warm. You smiled a little at the starry sky as well as the distant galaxies glowing right above you while listening to the sound of the wind melting into the sound of Loki’s footsteps.
- I could ask you the same thing. Loki stated and chuckled a little after he had walked to stand next to you. He raised his chin and shifted his eyes from you to the skies as well because he didn’t dare to stare at you… although you looked so beautiful tonight that the sight would surely haunt Loki’s dreams from now on.
- Ah, no one misses me there. you commented and after a small pause you added “Besides I do not feel like celebrating tonight” with a tone that was filled with suppressed melancholy.
- I see. Loki sighed and hesitated whether he should ask the following. He decided to ask you and after a quick inhale he spoke with a tone that was both worried and slightly jealous “Do you miss him?”
- Who? you asked with a clearly confused tone.
- The innkeeper. Loki replied, trying to sound as neutral as possible.
- Why would I miss… him? you asked and this time Loki could hear that you were somewhat amused.
- Because… Loki said and swallowed his jealousy before continuing. “…You love him and you haven’t seen him since I brought you back” Loki stated and then added “It has been five years now.” His statement however made you laugh harder than you had laughed in a long-long time.
- What amuses you so? Loki asked with a confused and surprised voice.
- I’m not in love with him! you exclaimed and continued laughing. “I never was” you admitted and enjoyed the feeling of laughter just pouring out from you. It made you feel livelier as well as lighter and lifted your mood instantly.
- So you… Loki said and paused for a moment. “…Lied?” he asked with tone that made it clear that he couldn’t believe it; he was the God of Mischief and Lies… and you had managed to fool him. He was both offended and impressed… but mostly just profoundly relieved.
- Yes. I guess I… did. you commented after calming down. You continued chuckling a little and took a quick glance at Loki who just commented “Oh.” You however you couldn’t interpret his tone at all. Was he… angry? Insulted?
- Loki, I was embarrassed, heartbroken and humiliated. you explained and turned to look at the tall king beside you. “I didn't want to love you so…” you said and stopped to gather your thoughts because now that you were finally looking at Loki, you got constantly lost into his eyes and were rendered speechless because of their soulful, mysterious depths. You cleared your throat and shifted your gaze from Loki’s eyes to the flickering candles that framed the pathways in the garden. “…I thought that if I convinced myself well enough that I didn't have those feelings for you...” you said and chuckled before adding “…It would eventually come true.” Your voice sounded bitterly amused and slightly disappointed. You were bitterly amused because despite your all best efforts you had not been able to fall out from love with Loki during the past seasons… past years.
- So… you’re not… in love. Loki asked. He sounded very confused and surprised.
- No, not with the innkeeper. you replied casually and sighed.
- Really? Loki exclaimed. He sounded enthusiastic although it was obvious that he tried to hide his happiness.
- Gosh Loki, I don’t even know his name. you stated and burst into laughter again.
- It means there is hope after all. Loki spoke with a barely audible tone, like he had been thinking aloud.
- Wait… if you have assumed that I am in love with another man… you spoke and inhaled before continuing. “…Then why have you… been so nice to me?” you asked. Loki did not say anything and therefore you listed with a confused tone “All the flowers, private dinners, walks in the garden… gifts.”
- I tried to win your heart. Loki admitted with a barely audible tone, like he had been embarrassed to say it aloud.
- It is not a competition, Loki. you commented, shifted your eyes back to the king and shook your head.
- Yes-yes. Loki muttered and then explained with a slightly hesitant and shy tone “But I wanted to show you that…” Loki said, took a deep breath and continued “I am better than…” however he stopped suddenly because he realized that he sounded quite bitter and very envious. “…Him” Loki mumbled. It was apparent to you that it was not the easiest subject for Loki to talk about.
- Him? You mean the innkeeper? you asked. You couldn’t believe it; was Loki actually jealous at the innkeeper? It had been five years! Had he been jealous at a mortal man all this time?
- Yes. the king admitted and rolled his eyes.
- So you were jealous. you mumbled, still trying to wrap your head around this revelation.
- If you want to put it so bluntly, then yes. Loki confirmed and added “Yes, I was jealous” with an annoyed tone. He inhaled sharply and mumbled to himself “Which is ridiculous because I am the king of Asgard.”
- I never loved you because you were the prince or because you’re the king. you commented and sighed as you tried to decide whether you should admit your feelings or not. It was now or never, you had to do it… you had to match Loki’s honesty with openness and sincerity. “I love you because you’re…” you said and placed your hand on Loki’s shoulder as you sighed “…You.”
- You love… me. Loki asked and shifted his gaze from you to your hand. He couldn’t believe it; such small gesture… but it had such a deep meaning… it meant that you were ready to let him close. You however mistook the glance as a sign of disapproval and removed your hand immediately.
- Yes, a silly girl is a silly girl. you commented and took a step back casually. You scolded yourself for such boldness but just as you were about to apologize and excuse yourself, Loki cleared his throat and offered his hand to you gracefully.
- Would you… accompany me for the rest of the evening? he asked and bowed deep, keeping his hand extended towards you and waiting for you to accept or decline his invitation. It was midnight already but the Asgardian parties were known to last until the sunrise and sometimes when there was plenty to celebrate, the festivities lasted for few days until the beverages and food were gone… so in that sense the party had barely begun.
- Thank you for the invitation… you said and dropped a curtsy before continuing. “…But I am quite tired” you said and added “I think I will retire early.”
- Oh, of course. Loki said. He had actually noticed that you looked a bit weary and if rest was what you needed then he wouldn’t make you stay awake for his sake. “May I walk you to your room?” Loki asked shyly.
- I would like that. you replied and added “Very much.” Then you took Loki’s hand and squeezed it a little. Loki lifted your hand up to his lips and pressed a soft kiss on the back of your hand. Loki walked you slowly through the garden to the door that led into your bedroom.
You and he walked hand in hand without saying a word. It was strange but it felt like you both had known what the other was thinking and therefore there was no real reason to speak. The garden was silent and for your surprise you managed to ignore the sounds of the party which made it seem like the whole world had been made for you two. Loki’s hand was large and soft, so warm and the way he held yours was filled with kindness and love, he led you gracefully in the darkness, making sure that you wouldn’t fall and even carried you over the wet grass so the hem of your dress wouldn’t get dirty. The moment was filled with sparkles and magic… and when you saw the door of your chamber at the end of a pathway paved with smooth stones, you felt your heart ache; you were not ready to let this go… to let Loki go. Not yet.
- So… this is it. you said when you reached the private terrace of your bedroom.
- I guess it is. Loki sighed, clearly trying to hide his disappointment. You knew that you had been walking in the garden much slower than you could have and taken some unnecessary detours as well… but despite all your efforts not to arrive to the destination… you had managed to do exactly that.
- Would you… like to come inside? you asked knowing that it would be very inappropriate but you didn’t really want the magical moment end so abruptly. You just wanted it to spend a bit more time alone with Loki now that you had a strong feeling that Loki felt something towards you… something deeper than just friendship.
- I should get back to the party. the king commented and took a quick glance at the direction where the music and the sound of lively chatter was coming from. You noticed the music now too… yes, the party. You were not the only people in the world after all.
- Yes. you sighed and nodded. “Your guest must be wondering where you are” you stated with a brief smirk.
- Perhaps I could… Loki said and after going through his options quickly in his mind, he continued “…You’ll get to bed and I will appear to you when you’ll call me.”
- Very well. you said and dropped a curtsy. Loki bowed, kissed your hand once more and then disappeared into the dark garden. You stayed in the doorway until you couldn’t hear his footsteps anymore and then got in. You got undressed, washed the party off quickly and sneaked into your bed after putting your sleeveless nightgown on. It was made of the finest silk and quite open from the back as well as the front which made it very light and easy to sleep in.
“Come to me, Loki” you said in your mind and waited for him to reply. “Are you in your nightgown and under the bed sheets?” you heard Loki asking in your mind with soft, deep voice. “Yes” you sighed and instantly saw Loki appearing into your candlelit bedroom. He looked real… so very real even though you knew that he was just a mirage… one of his illusions. But you enjoyed his presence even like this… and oh man was he gorgeous! Loki was wearing his favorite green tunic, black trousers with black leather boots and a regal, festive coat made of black leather and decorated with golden clasps. His hair framed his pale, handsome face and his eyes looked mysterious in the dim room.
- So, what happens now? you asked when Loki walked to your bed and lay down beside you. You rolled on your side to face him and stared deep into his soulful eyes.
- Nothing, my lady. I am not physically here. he answered and smiled a little. He looked so real, sounded so real… and you could imagine feeling his breath on your face since he was laying so close.
- This is almost appropriate then. you commented with a sincere smile and for the first time in many years there were small crow’s feet in the corners of your eyes to declare that your smile came straight from your heart.
- Oh, there it is. Loki sighed with adoring tone. “I have missed that” he added lovingly.
- What? you asked and chuckled a little.
- That smile. Loki said and traced your lips with his fingertips. You tried your very best to imagine how it would feel and smiled even more. “Hm” you sighed and rolled on your back, put your arm above your head on the pillow and closed your eyes.
- Do you know that you look absolutely gorgeous? Loki spoke softly. “Laying in bed, your chest rising and falling slowly… hair framing your beautiful face… slightly messy on the pillow…” he described and then added “…The hair, not the face.” The statement made you laugh and suddenly your bedroom was filled with loud giggle. “Oh, no-no, don’t laugh” Loki said, clearly amused as well. The truth was that he had hoped to make you laugh even though he knew that you were supposed to calm down and preferably fall asleep soon. You after all needed rest. “I wish I could kiss you now” Loki whispered after he had raised himself to hover above you.
- Maybe you’ll sneak here after the party ends. you suggested with your eyes closed. You knew that you couldn’t feel Loki because he wasn’t really here, but still your mind was playing tricks on you and therefore you could feel his lips brushing yours… his breath on your cheek, his hair… nose touching yours every once in a while.
- Well that is an intriguing invitation. Loki whispered and closed his eyes. He knew that he couldn’t really feel you because he was not physically there but… due to the gentle intensity of the moment, the God of Mischief could have sworn to feel your breath on his lips… the warmth of your body surrounding him… your lips trembling against his, so soft… so inviting… so beautiful.
- Uh-uh? you sighed and inhaled, held your breath for a moment and then relaxed completely as you emptied your lungs with one slow, deep exhale.
- Now sleep, my… love. Loki whispered.
- Have fun, dear Loki. you mumbled and then he was gone. Loki was back in the party, both physically and mentally, and continued mingling with his guests. He cherished the image of you falling asleep and found himself smiling seemingly without a reason almost constantly which then made the guests speculate what was going on.
After some hours you felt the mattress shift; it was the last hours before the sunrise and Loki had finally managed to excuse him from the party. Loki got closer to you as you slept on your side, facing him. He ran his fingers from your bare shoulder, along your arm to your wrist, stopping to trace the scar that the wolf’s bite had left. Loki knew that he could have read your mind easily and discovered all the secrets you were hiding but he decided to trust you; you would tell him everything when you were ready and therefore he did not even try to get into your head now. You had trusted Loki enough to invite him into your room and therefore Loki didn’t want to ruin everything by abusing that trust or by crossing any boundaries, neither mental nor physical.
- What took you so long? you asked with a barely audible tone.
- I got caught up in a conversation... Loki answered and then added with an amused tone “…With your parents.”
- Oh no. you sighed.
- They made it perfectly clear that I have their blessing to court you formally. Loki stated and tucked himself in. He also made sure that you had plenty of blanket and weren’t cold.
- Hm. you commented without opening your eyes. You were barely awake and even though you would have loved to see Loki’s face, you had no strength in you to do the physical work to actually open your eyes.
- Which is good because I am going to make you my wife... Loki spoke and run his fingertips on your arm higher, all the way to your shoulder and finally finding a trail of sensitive skin via your neck to your cheek. “…My queen... soon” he said and brushed your hair to reveal your gorgeous features.
- Hm. you commented again, this time almost inaudibly.
- If that is what you want. Loki added.
- Hmm. you mumbled.
- Thor wore a dress in the party... Loki stated with a smirk.
- Hm. you responded.
- ...and he fell into the fountain. he continued to test whether you were actually listening or not.
- I love your voice, dear Loki... you mumbled and after a sigh continued by saying “…But shut up and get some sleep.” Loki chuckled a little, got as close as he could and slid his hand on your back so he was able to hold you close as you both slept on your sides, facing each other and breathing calmly in the same peaceful, slow rhythm.
It was almost noon when you woke up. The sun was shining into the room, the golden rays caressing Loki’s face gently as you watched him sleeping carefree next to you. This was the sight that you had been dreaming about for such a long time and it was almost too good to be true. Therefore you shifted your hand from the pillow to Loki’s cheek and traced the features of his handsome face with your fingertips, barely daring to touch him. You didn’t want to wake Loki up because he was like a work of art… except better… he was a living, breathing person… so… perfect with all his flaws and imperfections. Suddenly he opened his eyes and smiled at you. His eyes sparkled like precious gemstones… or like a mysterious sea… as the sunlight hit them but as you drowned into the mesmerizing depths Loki suddenly rolled you to lay on your back against the pillows.
- So… Loki whispered and told you to close your eyes. You smiled, did as he asked you to and soon you felt Loki’s lips on yours. He drew back to brush his nose against yours playfully and then reached to kiss you again. The God of Mischief pressed a soft kiss on the corner of your mouth, let his lips get familiar with yours with light brushes and slightly mischievous nibbles. Loki chuckled against your mouth when he managed to make you sigh or even moan even though he had not even kissed you properly yet. He kept teasing you, waking up your senses like this and when you were fully awake, he finally wrapped his arm around you, lowered his chest on yours and started to kiss you properly.
His lips dominated yours but he was gentle at all times. Loki was surprisingly modest and sweet but occasionally he surprised you with intense hunger and passion. He deepened the kiss, devouring your mouth with his, using his lips, tongue and even teeth to make your head spin and your breath turn into sharp gasps and needy moans. You tangled your fingers into his raven-black hair as your other hand caressed his back under his light undershirt. Loki felt safe and strong, he was careful not to put too much of his weight on you even when you pulled him closer and demanded him to lower himself on you entirely.
Loki and you kept kissing each other, rolling in bed and declaring love towards each other until it was late afternoon. Sometime you pulled the light sheets over your heads and pretended that the surrounding world didn’t exist at all. You cuddled silently, found ways to be kind towards each other and sometimes you just joked and filled the room with laughter… but whatever you did in your private world, you always did everything with deep respect and in mutual understanding; there were some boundaries that couldn’t be crossed yet even though sometimes in the heat of the moment you could feel your patience wearing thin… especially when Loki kissed you with his entire being, moving his body against yours in the perfect unison, his lips leaving you breathless and his mind calling you and seducing you to fall madly in love with him.
Loki was both strong and gentle; he surprised you with light brushes when he explored your skin with his fingertips as well as his lips. He never slid his hand under the fabric of your nightgown and even during the times when the neckline of the open dress revealed a little bit too much, he was the perfect gentleman about it. You had stripped the king from his shirt and explored his lean but strong chest with your lips, memorizing every detail… as well as every sensitive spot that made Loki either laugh or moan. You sat on his lap, slid the nightgown down to your waist and took Loki’s hand, pressed it on your heart and kept it here so he could feel your heart drumming very fast under your ribcage.
Loki admired your soft, feminine curves for a moment and let his other hand caress your knee as well as your thigh. Suddenly Loki sat up and wrapped his arms around you, pressing his chest firmly against yours and hiding his face into the crook of your neck. He started to devour the skin with great hunger, using his lips, tongue and teeth to satisfy your need to be touched. He nibbled your earlobe and murmured into your ear how he wouldn’t be able to restrain himself much longer if you continued moving your hips so deliciously against him… and in fact you were able to feel his aroused, kingly manhood pressing against you through his trousers.
Loki guided you to lean back and when you did, he pressed kisses on your collarbones, tracing them with his tongue and without any sign he rolled you back to bed with one fluid motion and nested himself between your legs. Loki lowered himself to kiss your breasts, softly at first, just teasing and making you even needier and then finally he dared to intensify his actions. He planted hot open-mouthed kisses, nibbled, sucked and adored every inch of your chest, after which he returned to kiss your lips again. He caressed your leg with his fingertips, finding the sensitive spot of the back of your knee, adoring your ankle and massaging your calf with relaxing motions.
You wrapped your legs around Loki’s hips and enjoyed all the new sensations that this intimate closeness and his movements provided you. You caressed the muscles of his back and moaned into his ear how good he felt and how much you wanted him, adored him and loved him. You promised him that you would show him whatever he wanted to see… and you would keep no secrets from him. “I trust you, I’m ready” you said as Loki drew back to stare deep into your eyes. “I want you to know… everything” you added and brushed a strand of Loki’s hair behind his ear. Loki stopped his movements completely and after realizing what you had said, he smiled to you and nodded as an agreement.
From this morning on Loki and you started to court formally and after a couple of days you and Loki traveled through the portal to Midgard, walked in the forest where you gotten lost five years ago. You told him about the wolves, described how you had fought one with a dead tree branch and gotten injured. Then you also shared with Loki the embarrassing truth that you had almost given up; you let Loki into your mind and shared the memory of mental and physical exhaustion that had been enough to push you over the edge… which was something that you had never dared to admit… even to yourself.
Then you walked out from the forest and headed to the shore. You and Loki stood side by side by the half-frozen waterline of the fjord as big snowflakes floated down all around you and him into the water from the gray clouds. There was a little bit of mist like there had been on that very day and the scenery looked exactly how it had looked before. Loki took a glance at you as you stared at the mountains on the other side and listened to the calming sound of the tiny waves kissing the shore, the find blowing from the mountains and the sharp pieces of ice grinding against each other. All the sounds… the sight… you could even smell the freezing sea water in the air… everything was the same… but this time you had Loki beside you and it made you feel warm… like nothing could ever hurt you again.
You took Loki's hand and opened your mind for him but this time the memory of your attempt to drown yourself was not painful anymore; you had moved on. Loki placed his hand on your forehead and closed his eyes. He saw your struggles and finally he saw how you had chosen to die… but gotten saved in the very last moment. The God of Mischief felt the water filling his lungs like it had filled yours and he surrendered himself to the memory completely even though it shocked him as well as caused him physical pain. However Loki believed that he would never truly understand you… he would never get truly close to you if he didn’t open his mind to the painful memories that you carried with you and lived with every day.
Then you walked into the fishing village, found the innkeeper as well as the fishermen who had saved your life and rewarded them with gems made of gold and precious stones. It had been five years but they still recognized you… and Loki as well… mostly because there were very rarely strangers passing through in the village. You and Loki stayed a night at the inn and spent this little runaway planning your life together, imagining that nothing existed outside the small room in the inn. You ate a modest dinner, although it was a festive one by the local standards, took a long, warm and very relaxing bath together and then crawled into the bed, knowing that tonight you and your fiancée would surrender yourselves into a passionate embrace that would unite you mentally as well as physically for the rest of your immortal lives.