Loki / Reader (3)
- What is the matter, little brother? Thor asked when he saw Loki sitting alone in the garden. Loki did not answer. It was a beautiful evening and festivities for yet another battle won was about to begin. Thor, Loki and a handful of warriors had traveled through the nine realms defeating the enemies and securing the lives of the innocent people. For Thor it all was more or less just a bit of fun, but Loki took part to the travels because he was hopelessly in love with one of the warriors.
- Nothing! he scoffed and walked away.
Loki thought that she was the most beautiful lady in the court and her fighting skills were almost as good as Thor’s. When she entered the room, everybody went silent for a moment, mostly because of respect but some also because she was also feared for her strength and good kind of stubbornness. She was wise, witty and funny, sometimes a little reckless but she knew the boundaries of her skills very well. There was one thing that annoyed Loki though, it was the way she was always so strong and flirting with the men of the court.
You were not that flirty, or in your own opinion at least. You liked to challenge men and sometimes that was misread as flirting besides you had no idea of Loki’s attraction for you. You did not know how his heart screamed enviously when your laughter filled the great halls but he was not the one who was laughing with you. Loki had never told you about his feelings or even showed you that he had some.
You liked Loki. He was not like the warriors that you mostly spent your days with. Loki did not usually take part to the adventures but sometimes he did. He preferred reading and practicing his magic to fighting. Fighting after all was very tiring and messy; he liked his royal attire clean and spot on. You had been attracted to Loki when you had arrived to the court but soon you had learned that Loki did not have any feelings for you, although you had misunderstood.
You had been new to the court and you had tried so hard to fit in. You had been raised by a high lord and lady who were close friends with Odin and his wife but then one night the enemies of Asgard had attacked and killed your parents. That was the reason why you had been taken into the court. Your life had not been about fighting, but science, arts and beautiful things but since that life had been so brutally stolen from you, you had started to train to be a warrior so one day you could defeat the ones that robbed your parents away from you.
It was a long ago. You had been full of sadness and rage back then, but with time you had managed to let it go. You had been attracted to Loki and then one night after countless of hours of practicing and self-prepping in front of the mirror of your chambers you had dared to ask him for a dance. You had however caught Loki on his bad day and he had rejected you publicly and broken your heart in the process. You had smiled but it was had only been a smile that you had learned to cover your real emotions. You were a lady after all.
Loki had not been even able to guess the damage he had done with his despising glare and annoyed tone. He had not meant to be so rude and cold but he was having a bad day and therefore he had not been filtering that much. He had never apologized to you and since he was the prince, he had not really felt that he had needed to apologize. Besides, he was the god and you were not. You were immortal and from a noble background but you were not a god.
You had not excused yourself from the party neither you had gotten yourself drunk but the next day you had found Thor and asked him if you could join the fighting practices. He had said “no” the first 10 times you had asked but then accepted your request since you had not given up. You had learned fast and very soon you had been welcomed to participate to the quests that took you to the far corners of the nine realms and lifted your ranks in the court. Suddenly you had transformed from a silent library-girl to a celebrated warrior. That was the time when Loki had noticed you.
He had cursed him for not noticing you sooner because it started to seem that now it was too late. People were talking that you were going to marry his brother Thor someday although Loki knew that if it was up to you, you would not marry Thor. You after all were a thinker who had forced herself into something else to forget the embarrassment that Loki had caused and also to forget the grief that losing your parents had caused. Thor had never mentioned anything and you suspected that he did not even have feelings for you but sometimes it seemed to you that Thor did not even understand love or care about such things. Maybe he would ask your hand in marriage just to get a strong queen for himself. He knew after all that you were smart and he thought that you were quite beautiful.
When you had become a warrior you had gotten many fans in the court and outside as well. That had been the time when Loki had noticed you. He had sometimes spied on you when you had been alone practicing your singing skills, the artistic side of you that you had forgotten because it reminded you about your life before becoming a warrior. He had sometimes witnessed you crying alone in the garden but when he had come to comfort you, you had faked a smile and told him that everything was fine.
That had annoyed Loki greatly. The fact that you had the nerve to lie to him, the god of mischief and lies, had turned his stomach around. The irritation had turned into jealousy with time since it was apparent that he was not the only admirer you had. You were surrounded by handsome warriors almost all the time and just to make things worse, you had started to flirt with them.
You had started to laugh at their stupid jokes even though you had not considered them as amusing in any way. You had started to dress a bit flashier manner and slightly more daringly although never with bad taste. You looked always graceful so it was easy to forget that you were actually pretty dangerous to mess up with. Loki had not had courage to ask you for a dance although he would had wanted to, but he was worried that you would have your revenge and refuse him, besides you were always busy dancing with other men so there were no real chances for Loki to ask you anyway, without seeming desperate or too emotionally attached anyway. He was worried that you would look at him with the same pitiful look in your face and then laugh coldly as he had done. “Why would I want to dance with you?” he had asked and caused people around to burst into laughter. You had been confused but the smile had never failed you.
Jealousy. Loki was well familiar with that feeling, although he had been jealous at Thor for the fact that Odin seemed to favor him, however now he was jealous for a different reason and the reason was you. The feeling burned his insides and made him lose his sleep sometimes. It made him participate on his brothers quests and then talk to you rudely when he did not know how to otherwise light a spark in your cool exterior. That caused massive verbal fights between you and him sometimes and you were completely sure that Loki hated and despised you, although the situation was entirely opposite.
Loki had even started to mock your popularity among the men to the point that you had done two things; firstly you had started to flirt even more just to annoy Loki and secondly you had started to avoiding the situations when he was left alone with you up to the point that those situations became somewhat nonexistent. If you were in a room alone and Loki entered it, you left immediately, that annoyed Loki and sometimes he wanted just to either grab your hand and make you stay or follow you to the end of the world if he had to.
Loki in a way hated himself for being so soft when it came to you. He hated that you had such a strong influence on him. He could not stand being apart from you but neither could he stand being close to you knowing that you most likely hated him for doing what he had done. Therefore he had now started to spend also time in the library, trying to find a spell that would mute his feelings and kill the longing he had for you. He could not live with it anymore.
It was a rainy afternoon in Asgard. You were in the library studying for the quest that you were going to participate later that day. You wanted to know your enemy before going to the battle so therefore you rather hid yourself among the books than took part to the fighting practices with the other warriors. This was something that Thor always scolded you for but you always told him to remember how you had saved lives many times by knowing the enemy and prevented many casualties from happening. You had for example known that one certain enemy always hid in the trees and then attacked all of a sudden by dropping nets over the warriors and then jumping, or when you had known that the enemy used traps so the warriors had been able to look for the triggers in the forest.
You were deep in your though so you completely missed the sound of the door opening and footsteps approaching the table. You jumped slightly when a heavy spell book was dropped on the table. You raised your head a little and saw Loki sitting down opposite from you. This time you did not leave. No, learning the enemy was more important. If Loki had a problem with your presence, he was more than welcome to leave himself, besides you were there first.
After an hour of self-control your eyes however got distracted from your book when Loki, the handsome prince who was sitting right in front of you with his majestic black hair and that charmingly thoughtful look on his face, sighed and turned the page. You noticed the title and managed to read it although the text was upside down from your perspective.
- The spell to banish love. you mumbled barely audible as you read the title. Loki heard you and lifted his gaze from the book. He looked at you silently and let his greenish blue eyes drill holes into your exterior that was always so cool and controlled, like lady should.
- So tell me, prince Loki, who are you in love with and why are you trying to banish it? you asked casually as you returned to glance through the text in front of you. Loki was annoyed. This was not the time to start arguing with you, he was not in the mood.
- I do not think it concerns you, my lady. he answered with a cold, distant tone.
- I see. you said turned a page. You had been reading about your enemy now for an hour and half but you had not gone to the part that told you how they fought when they were outnumbered.
- I did not know that you are capable of such feelings. you stated with a tone that was equally cold and distant. Loki was boiling on the inside. Your arrogance had no limits and he had to put a stop to that.
- You. he stated.
- What about me?
- It is you whom I love, but do not worry, my lady, I am going to crush every bit of warmness that my cold heart might have towards you. he answered with an irritated tone that carried a hint of sadness as an undertone. You lifted your eyes from the book and stared at Loki who was seemingly concentrated to the book again. He however was painfully aware of your stare and fought the urge to meet your eyes with his with all his willpower.
- Why? you managed to ask. You were suddenly hurt and your mind was anywhere but in the forthcoming battle that you should had been concentrating in.
- I cannot live like this anymore. he answered with bitter voice.
- I see. you commented. He still did not raise his gaze from the book.
- I cannot stand seeing you flirting with the other men… You are so disgustingly easy, I bet you have visited the chamber of every man in this court already.
- Are you jealous? you asked. You felt terrible that he even thought such things. Loki groaned. Then there was a messenger for you, delivering a word from Thor, telling you that it was the time to go. You glanced at the book and realized that you had never gone into the battle so ill prepared and with your mind so unfocused. You left the book open and stood up. You were walking away already but then you stopped.
- Loki… you said with a silent voice. You did not bother to turn to look whether he was paying any attention or not.
- I have never even kissed a man. I always hoped that you would be my first kiss. you said and then left. You felt tears rolling on your cheeks but you wiped them away and calmed your mind before you met with the other warriors. Then you left.
You went to the furthest realm and fought there, but your mind was distracted and you were making many terrible mistakes that almost got you killed far too many times. The enemy was getting outnumbered and their strategy changed completely. Suddenly you found yourself stranded from your battle mates, seemingly alone in the forest. You had managed to read up to that point, so you knew that this was what they did, but then you had not read further and it made you nervous.
Suddenly you felt an arrow hitting you on the left side of your stomach. You were wearing armor of course but the arrow had been shot from a rather close distance so it pierced the leather armor and penetrated your flesh. You had never felt such pain before. Mostly because you had never gotten seriously hurt during your previous battles. You felt another arrow hitting you and time slowed down. You touched your stomach with your fingers and then raised your hand in front of your eyes. It was red and sticky and you felt the warmth dripping away from your body. You fell on your knees and then on your side on the ground that was covered with moss and other plants. The last thing you saw was your battle companions attacking and the last thing you smelled was the wet moss that had a strong scent of all things rotting in the forest.
In the meantime Loki was still reading about the spell. He tried to ignore what you had said and he tried to forget the look that you had had on your face when the messenger had called you. He had never seen you so distracted and scared, entirely unprepared. Loki put the spell book away and walked to the other side of the table. He glanced through the page and realized that the enemy that you were facing was a cunning and resilient one and their nature was the most dangerous when they were outnumbered. They waited that their enemy thought that the battle was over and then they fired their crossbows from close distance, from their secret hiding places. This made Loki nervous. He did not know whether you had gotten that far or not.
After a couple of hours he heard the guards shouting something about getting the healers. Loki was walking in the garden trying to clear his head and then he saw Thor carrying you. Your arm hung limp and lifeless and there were 2 arrows sticking victoriously on your stomach, declaring how you had been defeated. Loki ran to Thor and exclaimed
- What happened, brother?
- Lady (Y/N) got ambushed. We are all very shocked because usually she sees these things from far distance.
- Why did you not keep her safe? Loki exclaimed and looked at Thor with accusing flare in his eyes.
- (Y/N) got stranded from the rest of us. She walked into the trap and there was nothing we could had done, little brother. Thor answered and lay you down on a table. The healer came and ordered both Thor and Loki to leave the room. Loki took one glance at your pale face that looked almost dead and recited a spell which sent your spirit to rest in the most beautiful place that he had ever visited. There, he hoped, you would be safe from the darkness, death, pain and fear.
The healers removed the armor and the arrows. They stopped the bleeding and tied the wounds. Loki was walking in the hallway nervously when the healer came to ask him for some help.
- Can you please carry Lady (Y/N) into her chamber to rest, Prince Loki? she asked. Her hands were covered in deep red blood since she had not washed her hands yet. The sight made Loki’s heart ache. That red stuff was supposed be running in your veins and not covering the hands of the healer. Loki nodded and entered the room.
He saw you on the table. Your clothes had been changed and you were now wearing a light gown that covered the bandages. You looked almost dead because there was no color on your cheeks and even your lips were gray. The only thing that made you look somewhat alive was the fact that your chest was rising and falling slowly although the motion was so weak that it was easy to miss if you did not pay attention.
Loki took your hand and brushed his thumb over your knuckles softly. He was surprised about the softness of your hand and shocked about the coldness of it. He would had wanted to touch your cheek but you looked so fragile that he was afraid that you would break if he did that.
He lifted you into his arms and then carried you into your chamber, where he had never been before. He was surprised to find it filled with books and flowers, there were musical notes on the table and there, right in the back was your bed. He walked there and lay you on the silken sheets, took his own cloak off his shoulders and spread it on you. He lifted an armchair next to the bed and sat down. After a while Thor entered the room.
- Brother, I thought I might find you here. he said. Loki greeted him and then turned his focus on you again.
- She was making mistakes even before she got lost in the forest alone. We thought that the battle was over and started to look for any survivors. Then we found her laying on the ground with arrows on her chest. Thor explained. Loki closed his eyes and tried to keep his anger from boiling over. He blamed his brother who was sometimes blind to everything else that was going on around him.
- Well… I came to tell you that the healer believes that (Y/N) will survive and wake up in a couple of days. Loki did not answer, neither did he shift his eyes from your face. He only nodded as a sign that he had heard and understood what Thor had told him.
After a couple of days you finally woke up. Surprisingly you did not feel pain. It was due to Loki’s spell that kept the pain away and replaced it with a feeling of strange calmness and warmth. Loki was reading a book but he put it away immediately when he heard you asking for water. Your wounds had almost healed already, thanks for the Asgardian medicine and your noble bloodline; although you were not a god, you still had some of their qualities, healing quickly was one of them.
Loki immediately poured some water to a glass and then sat on the edge of your bed. He helped you to sit up and even to drink.
- Thank you. you said with a weak voice. Loki put some pillows behind your back so you could sit comfortably.
- What… happened? he asked. You had never heard him so worried or concerned.
- I was not prepared. you said and tried to smile, since you did not want Loki to know just how scared you had been. But the smile left your face and your breathing changed.
- I thought I was going to die. you said and broke down to cry. For your surprise Loki wrapped his arms around you and stroked your hair slowly. He listened to your silent sobbing and kept whispering into your ear that you were now safe and how you would never be in danger again because he would make sure that no harm would come to you anymore. His voice was soft and his embrace was calming so you fell into a peaceful state of sleep almost immediately.
Loki held you for a couple of hours and then lay you down. He was going to leave the bed and return to the armchair but you grabbed his hand and mumbled “please stay” in your sleep so Loki encouraged his mind and lay down next to you. He took you into his arms and allowed himself to fall asleep as well. He had not slept for a couple of days and he needed the sleep just as badly as you did.
When you woke up you felt almost as good as new. Suddenly you realized that you were not alone. You sat up and noticed the familiar looking cloak that was keeping you warm. It was black and green and there was only one person in Asgard who loved those colors above every other. You gathered your courage and turned your head and saw Loki sleeping next to you.
You were confused about what was going on. As far as you knew, Loki wanted nothing to do with you… but then you remembered that he had said that he loved you. Well, he had not really said that but he had wanted to banish the love he had for you, so it meant, in other words, that he loved you. You hoped that he had not managed to do it yet.
You left the bed and went into the bathroom, got undressed, washed your face and wiped your skin with a wet cloth before getting dressed in different dress. When you came out from the bathroom you found Loki standing at the window, looking out, dressed in the cloak that had kept you warm just a moment ago. It was still raining and the day was gray and gloomy. He turned immediately when he heard you opening the bathroom door.
- You are aware of how improper this is for you to be in my private chamber, aren’t you? you asked with a shaky voice.
- Yes. Loki answered.
- But I could not stay away. he continued before you managed to say anything. You walked next to him and stared into the garden. It had never looked so unfamiliar and depressing.
- There is one thing I should ask you. Loki began. You turned to face him and shivered a little as there was a wind blowing from the open door filling the room with cool, humid air. Loki noticed that you were shivering so he took the cloak off his shoulders and put it on yours instantly. He examined your form trying to decide whether you were alright or not.
- So ask me.
Loki took your hands and stepped a bit closer, still keeping a proper distance as a gentleman should. He seemed nervous and even shy, which was very uncharacteristic of him.
- I would like an honor to court you formally… and I wanted to ask if you could forget our disagreements and accept my heart as I offer it to you. If you cannot, I understand and I will go through with the spell-
- Stop. you said and Loki stopped talking immediately.
- Are you sure that it is what you want? You broke my heart once…
- And for that I am so sorry. There are only few things that I regret and that is one of those… things. he said and looked into your eyes with a sort of urgency in his. He had to know what you felt and thought, if he had any hope. Suddenly you squeezed his hands and smiled. Loki sighed relieved. He wanted to wrap his arms around you but he was too shy to do something so intrusive.
- Can you forgive me? I shall never repeat the same mistake. he asked.
- It is all forgiven and forgotten. you answered with a smile on your face.
- May I… kiss you? Loki asked. You chuckled a little and blushed slightly. Many had tried, none had succeeded. However no one had ever asked you before. You raised your head and closed your eyes. You looked serene and breathtakingly beautiful there waiting. Loki let go of your hands and placed his on your cheeks. He brushed the skin with his thumbs and then leaned closer. He had kissed plenty of ladies before but he had never wanted kiss anyone so much as he wanted to kiss you.
He brushed your cheek with his lips, just softly and closed his eyes. The anticipation was almost killing you; your first kiss ever was about to happen with the man you had spent years and years dreaming about. His nose touched yours and soon he pressed a soft kiss on the corner of your mouth. You smiled and soon felt his warm breath on your lips as his hovered over yours. You sighed and tried not to breathe so much.
Finally he pressed his lips on yours, just softly at first. He did not dare to move until you moved a little. Then he started to explore your lips gently and slowly. You mirrored what he did and soon you dared to wrap your arms around him. You got lost into his warmth as he moved his other hand behind your back and with other he tangled his fingers into your hair and gently pressed you closer as the kiss grew slightly deeper and more intimate, although it still remained very modest. Loki was the prince and a gentleman after all, and despite the fact that he was sometimes driven by lust, vanity and greed, he wanted your first kiss to be sweet and gentle, like it should.
He drowned you into kindness and affection until you were out of breath. When he parted his lips from yours, he still stayed close, smiling against your lips. He pressed a couple of soft kisses on them before really drawing back and stepping further away from you. He smiled and then bowed slowly as a sign of goodbye. You walked him to the door of your chamber. He took your hand and pressed a kiss on your knuckles before asking
- Will you accompany me to the dinner tonight?
- Do you think that your father accepts me to join?
- Of course and if he doesn’t… I shall dine with you.
- Very well. I shall meet you in the grand hall at the time of sunset. you said and smiled shyly. Loki bowed and kissed your knuckles again. Then he let go of your hand and turned away. He walked gracefully along the long corridor and you watched him until he turned a corner and got out of sight. Then you closed door and leaned onto it. Your heart was about to burst and all you could do was to smile.