Thranduil / Reader (2)
- My lady…
You heard the familiar voice from behind. You smiled, turned around and answered
- Thranduil, what a lovely surprise.
You were happy that you were well beyond the need of formality when you were alone with your close friend. You had known the king since he had been the prince and you had become his trusted counselor and companion during the years that you had spent in Mirkwood. Your parents had moved from Lothlorien a long, long time ago when Oropher had invited your family there for diplomatic reasons. You had basically become an elf of Mirkwood because you could not even remember your life in your home realm. After all you had been very young when you had moved.
- Taking a walk? he asked. His tone was deep but soft as it usually was when he talked to you.
- Yes. Such a wonderful evening, isn’t it? It would be a shame to waste it. you answered. Thranduil offered you his arm and smiled. You were happy to let him guide you through the gardens like he had done for so many times before.
- Yes. It indeed is, the last warm days before autumn. he commented.
- Tell me, my dear lady, what have you been up to lately? he asked after a moment of walking in silence. You chuckled; even after all this time he always called you “my lady” although you had given him a permission to call you with your name the first day of your friendship and after that you had told him several times to do so but he never did.
- I’ve been busy…
- With what?
- With the correspondence with the other elven realms.
- So busy that you have not had a chance to share your valuable time with me? he asked teasingly. You smiled and tried not to get affected by his subtle flirting which he had been doing more lately. Or actually not lately; earlier but then he had drawn back for some reason unknown to you.
- Yes, so it would seem. you chuckled as a response. You considered Thranduil as your friend, you shared a deep, warm bond of friendship but that was all and that was what you kept telling yourself on daily basis nowadays. What had begun as a mere-friendship for you had turned into deeper one-sided affection as the time had passed by.
You came to a dark, private corner of the garden where the trees blocked almost all of the sunlight and the air had a thick scent of exotic flowers, the last flowers of the summer. You let go of his arm and walked to a bench. You put your hands on your lap when you sat down accompanied with a long sigh.
- It is such a shame that a lady like you is still not spoken for. he said. You lifted your head and looked at him surprised. You were completely rendered speechless.
- I have a surprise for you and I am quite certain that this will make you happy. he continued.
- A surprise? you asked. The surprised look on your face never left you.
- Yes. You have been my loyal ally for a long time and I think it is time for you to be something else.
Your heart was racing and you could not believe what you were hearing. Could it be, could it actually be that the king would-
- I have arranged you to be married with a noble lord from Lorien. I bet you miss home.
“Wait, what?” you thought as you politely kept the smile on your face. The years in the Mirkwood court had really taught you to conceal your real emotions.
- But… Mirkwood is my home… you managed to stammer.
- Surely you miss your home realm. Thranduil stated and sat beside you. He took your hand, it was cold and you had gone pale.
- You wish me to… leave Mirkwood and get married? I don’t understand. Have I done something to…
- To what? he asked. You pulled your hand away and stood up.
- To upset you?
- No, not at all! I thought you would be overjoyed.
- Overjoyed? you repeated as you looked around. You could not believe what you had been just told.
- I… I don’t understand! you continued and looked at him with a puzzled look on your face.
- Clearly I was mistaken. he answered and sounded irritated. You snapped back to your place. You, no matter how close friend you were with the king, were in no position to question his judgment although in this case it was not better than your own.
- No… Not at all… my lord. you answered and faked a smile.
- When shall I leave? you asked.
- I have arranged a carriage to take you to Lorien tomorrow. I really hope you will become happy there. It seems to me that you have not been that content here for some time.
- And what is my future husband like?
- He… he is a respected and brave lord. He is… kind and subtle with a good heart. He will surely be a great match for you.
- You mean he will calm down my fiery spirit? you joked but it was a sad excuse for a cover-up-joke.
- You need someone solid in your life. Someone who can calm down the storms and be the mountain on which you can finally grow your roots.
- I had no idea that you thought that I need someone like that. I assure you I have been quite… content… navigating the storms, my lord. Surely you cannot deny that I’ve become quite skillful in that.
- Indeed, but… he commented and sounded offended.
- No, I am not questioning your decision. you answered and smiled briefly.
- I should go and pack. you added before bowing and walking away.
You did not have too many things, or you did but most of them had been gotten from the people of the Mirkwood court and you did not want to take them with you. You wanted nothing to remind you about the time you had spent there. You wiped a tear that had escaped your eye when there was a knock on the door. The king had arranged a private dinner to celebrate the new chapter in your life. You followed the maid to the dining hall where Thranduil was waiting already.
You shared a casual chat and he asked if you had packed already. He stated that he could not keep you for himself anymore and watch you wasting your life in the court as you helped him to carry his burdens.
- It has not been a burden, my lord.
- Why do you call me “my lord” all of a sudden? he asked. You chuckled. Yeah, why were you doing that? You had been calling him by his first name since the first day, even before he had given you the permission to do so. Now you called him “my lord” because you were trying to push yourself away from him so leaving would be easier.
- You are the king. you answered and emptied the glass with one long gulp.
- I have been the king all this time but now suddenly it matters to you?
- It’s just easier.
- Why is that? he asked.
- I cannot help but think why…
- You danced with that lord during the starlight –feast last year. You seemed to enjoy his company very much.
- Who?
- The lord that I’ve arranged you to marry…
- What?
- You spent the whole night out having a conversation with him… Thranduil stated. There was a hint of jealousy in his voice although he did his best not to let it show.
- Well yes… he shared some lively stories and news from Lorien…
- You have been somewhat distant after that and therefore I figured…
- You figured that I should… go and marry him?
- It was obvious that his company gave you great pleasure… I’ve been selfish to keep you here all this time.
- You should had told me that you were planning this. Don’t I have a say about anything? I had no idea that you want me to leave… you stated with raised voice and stood up.
- I don’t.
- So why you’re sending me away?
- Because I cannot watch you loving another. he shouted.
- Loving another? you asked and scoffed.
- I am not… You should know that! you continued.
- But I am leaving tomorrow because that’s what you want me to do! you shouted.
- No… It is not…
- So what are you going to do about it? you blurted. Thranduil gave you an annoyed glare but kept silent.
- That’s what I thought. you commented with a disappointed tone and turned your back at him. You walked to the door and just before exiting the room you turned and said
- It was you… It has always been you.
Then you were gone. Thranduil stood up but sank back into his chair. He was puzzled, angry and relieved at the same time however his pride did not let him to run after you.
You ran to your room hoping that you would hear the echo of footsteps after you but you did not. You had told him that he was the keeper of your heart and had always been, well you had not exactly used those words but you had said something! You had loved him secretly from the sidelines even when he was married to another. You had always wished him the best and even supported his marriage and mourned the death of his wife. How can it be that he had never noticed that your arms ached to hold him when his shoulders were burdened with the worries of the realm? Why did he not see? What made him so blind?
Your desperation turned into anger when you thought about him wanting to send you away because he could not tolerate the sight of you courting another. Ha-ha! Like you had even been interested in anyone else! He rather sends you away to the realm that was no longer your home. Mirkwood was your home now but he just could not see it; for him you were always that elf who had been ripped off her roots and forced to abandon her home. A foreigner, an outsider. If he wanted you gone, you would go and never look back.
Thranduil could not sleep. “It has always been you” kept going on and on in his head. Those words echoed in his mind and made his heart ache. He did not know what to think; should he voice his feelings or let you go? He knew that he had handled the situation poorly, hell, he had misjudged your recent state of being busy corresponding and being mentally absent as longing for the other lord when you had actually been having feelings for him.
It was morning. You had packed all night and when the first rays of the rising sun danced in the highest tree branches there had been a guard to take your bags to the carriage. You said goodbye to your room and closed the door behind you. You had been crying until you could not cry anymore. Maybe this was a good thing, maybe this was what you needed. Maybe the king saw more than you did, after all he was unimaginably wise and observant.
You said farewell to the maids and guards that were watching you leave, you even said goodbye to Legolas. Thranduil however was not there. It made you sad but at the same time it gave you closure. You looked at the sky as you walked across the yard to the carriage. Before you stepped in you turned around and tried to get a sight of Thranduil but he really was not there. With heavy heart you sat down and closed the door, signaled the elf who was sitting in the front to get going. The carriage moved.
You stared out from the window as the carriage slowly moved through the forest along the forest road. The summer was turning into autumn and the first trees had already turned yellow already. You dozed off because of the steady rocking of the carriage and the constant sound of the wheels turning on the gravel road.
Suddenly you woke up when your ride stopped moving. You had been having a dream of your parents. They had returned to Lorien after you had been educated to attend the diplomatic matters and were capable to take care of them by yourself. You had not seen them for a long time but you had heard rumors that the high elves of Lorien were leaving Middle Earth and sailing to the Undying Lands beyond the sea. In a way this was the perfect time to return “home” so you could see them once before their departure.
You rubbed your eyes and asked the elf
- Why did we stop?
There was no answer. You sighed and put on your cloak before opening the door and stepping out. The air was cool and it made you shiver as you left the warmth of the passenger space. It was a cold day and there was a chilling wind blowing from the north.
When you stepped out you saw Thranduils elk standing on the road sideways in front of the horses, blocking the way. You heard a sound of a galloping horse from the opposite direction and you turned. It was Thranduil. He was practically racing with his cloak and hair flying because of the speed. When he was just ten meters away he commanded the horse to stop and jumped off. The sound of his shoes on the gravel got mixed with the sound of his cloak swishing as he strode closer to you. Without saying a word he lifted you in his arms and carried you to his horse.
- I am taking you back home. he said when he put you down. You hopped effortlessly on the horse and watched him explaining the situation to the driver; he was to find a place where he could turn the carriage around and return to the palace. Then the king hopped on the horse to sit behind you and whispered into your ear.
- Mirkwood is your home, is it not... (Y/N)?
You smiled and turned your head. You felt his warmth radiating from his body, you felt his entire presence surrounding you and his ice-blue eyes that were usually cold and mercilessly piercing through anyone and everyone were looking into yours with such softness that you had not seen since the death of Legolas' mother. You touched his cheek gently and answered
- My home is where you are.