1. The first mission
Natasha was staring blankly at the files in front of her, trying to study them but failing miserably. She scoffed and tossed them away. "Why do we have to do this?"
Clint, who was lounging on a big couch opposite of her, put his newly made arrows aside and looked up at her. "Well, you have to do this. You know nothing about SHIELD and the procedures we have here. You need to learn some things before your first mission with us."
"I know that they have an archer who in his free time likes to play the spy." She murmured, smirking slightly.
Clint faked a smile. "Very funny. You're welcome, by the way... You know, for saving your life and not killing you even though I was supposed to."
Nat rolled her eyes at him. "For how much longer will you keep mentioning that?"
He chuckled. "Oh, I haven't even started yet, Widow." Natasha sighed and turned back to papers in front of her. "You need to study these papers, you don't know who your next partner is gonna be. Not everyone here is as easy-going and charming as me."
She laughed. "That was even better than my joke, Hawk. Good job." She teased him. "And, oh, I really hope my partner will be the exact opposite of you."
"Well, then I'm afraid you'll be disappointed, miss Romanoff." Nick Fury stated.
Both agents turned their looks at the Director. "How long had you been standing there?" Clint questioned furrowing his eyebrows.
"Long enough to realize that you two have started to bond."
"Yeah, being given a second chance in life can do that to a woman," Romanoff commented sarcastically. "By the way, is he always so quiet?" She asked Clint, getting a positive nod as a response.
Nick suppressed a smile. "I'm glad you feel comfortable with Agent Barton because you'll work with him for the next two months."
Clint sat up. "Wait, what?" He widened his eyes at Nick.
"Is there a problem, Barton?"
"Yes!" Clint replied quickly. "Are you sure this is a good idea? Considering the fact that, you know, I was sent to kill her?" He added.
"As much as I hate saying it, I think Barton is right. Look, I want to fit in here and disagreeing with you isn't the best option for me, but teaming up with the only SHIELD agent that I have a decent relationship with, isn't either. Don't you think that I have to get to know the other agents, too?"
"I do, Agent Romanoff. But, as you can imagine, most of the agents here are..." He paused. "I don't know how to say it nicely..." He cleared his throat. "They're terrified of you. Nothing personal, it's just that your reputation here hasn't been the best. And I believe that you have to go to a few missions as a SHIELD agent first with someone that isn't scared of you." He paused and gave the two agents a glance. "So, Coulson is on his way here to tell you more about your first mission. I hope you haven't planned anything on Valentine's day, agents."
...
Clint was pacing up and down their hotel room, checking the time each time he took a turn. "Will you stop checking the clock every five seconds? Time isn't gonna pass faster if you do."
"I just want this mission to be over already," Clint replied bitterly.
"Aww, does our little hawk have a date and doesn't want to be late?" Natasha teased him.
He stopped his frantic pacing and turned to look at her. "No, I'm just bored of this mission. My missions aren't so... dull usually. And this one is killing me." He complained.
"Stop grumbling. It'll be over soon, we just need to get the files as soon as the guards have their lunch break. And then you can make plans for today with a not-so-lucky lady."
He arched an eyebrow at her. "And, why exactly wouldn't she be lucky?"
"Being on a date with you? Oh, please. I'd rather spend an eternity with Coulson."
Clint smirked and took a seat next to her. "Oh, is that so?" She nodded in reply. "Then I can arrange that." He stood up and took his phone.
"Wait, what?"
"I mean, I can't guarantee it will be an eternity, but a first date is certain."
"No, stop it!" she protested.
"Oh, I can already feel the excitement of a new romance radiating from you, Romanoff." He commented as he started dialing Phil's phone number.
"Barton, I swear I'm gonna kill y-"
"Hey, Phil!" Clint exclaimed happily. "Um... You know I was wondering... Do you have any plans for tonight? Because I just found a lady who is eager to spend Valentine's day with you..." He suggested, winking at his partner. Natasha gave him a death glare. "Perfect, sounds like a plan. Oh, no. I'm not gonna spoil the surprise and tell you who she is...
But she has big plans for you two, so get ready. Okay? Yeah, sure. Bye." He hung up and placed a victorious smile on his face.
"I hate you so much," Natasha muttered.
"Well, next time you'd better think twice before you talk." He replied smiling at her.
2. Netflix and kill
Natasha had been into SHIELD for more than three years. She was finally able to gain her fellow agents' trust and be one of the best SHIELD agents. She had already accomplished making many friendships into the organization. But her best friend was that certain archer who had spared her life and given her one more chance to become someone better. They had come to a point that they even stayed at each others' apartments now and then, mostly after a common mission. They cared for each other and enjoyed each other's company. They even had their own 'Friday movie' habit.
Natasha reached her couch and placed a huge bowl of popcorn between her and her fellow assassin. "So what are we watching?" Clint asked.
"Well, to honor the day I think we should watch a romantic movie. And I chose the worst."
"What day is it?" Clint furrowed his eyebrows.
"It's the 14th of February. The oh-so-overrated day for the oh-so-much-in-love couples." She replied sarcastically.
"Oh, yeah. I had forgotten about it."
"So, are we watching my extremely cheesy movie?"
"I hate romantic movies so much. Of course we will."
"Great, I can't wait until the good part starts. Nothing is funnier than a romantic movie."
Natasha hit play and sat back to enjoy her choice. The two spies spent the next two hours laughing and commenting every scene they thought was ridiculous. After the movie ended, Natasha hit pause and closed the TV.
"So, why don't you like this kind of movies? I thought girls like that." Clint wondered.
"Well, when you're raised to be a cold-blooded assassin without any kind of emotion, it's hard to like the most emotional movies ever made in the history of mankind. So yeah, not a big fan." Clint's phone started buzzing. He took a glance at it and put it away without bothering answering it. Natasha raised an eyebrow at him. "Anything you wanna share, Hawkeye?"
Clint shook his head negatively. "No, not really."
Natasha sat back and took a sip out of her beer. "C'mon, Barton. Say it."
He left a groan as he scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. "There's this girl. And she... She kind of likes me, I think. And she keeps calling me and talking to me. But she's not my type and I can't get her to stop flirting with me." He admitted.
"You want me to take her out?" Nat offered coldly.
Clint widened his eyes at her. "Kill her?"
"No, Clint. Take her out on a date." She teased him. "I mean... Do you want me to take her out..."
Clint squinted at her. "You're... kidding, right?"
She couldn't keep herself anymore and burst into laughter. "Of course I do, but it's always amusing watching your confused face." She replied. "But seriously, though... You have to give her a chance. What do you have to lose?" She suggested.
"You think so?" Clint asked back, taking a shrug of her shoulders as a response.
"What's her name?"
"Laura."
Natasha smiled. "Nice name. Call her, Barton. But not today, it's a dangerous day for this kind of calls." She consulted him, giving him a smirk. Clint's phone started ringing again. "Is it her again? Well, that's some strong will."
"No, that's Coulson. They need Strike Team Delta."
"Well... That was a hell of a Valentine's Day."
3. Mission Gone Wrong
It wasn't the first time a mission had gone south. It wasn't the first time they had to get separated during a mission. And it definitely wasn't the first time one of them was in danger. But it was the first time one of them was in seriousdanger.
Natasha was running down the halls into a building, being chased by two agents. "Barton, do you copy? I took out three agents, two of them are still after me. Where are you?"
She called out. "Clint? Clint, do you copy?" She let out an irritated sigh. "You're such an asshole, Barton. Answer me!" A muffled groan came as a response. "Are you there, Clint?"
"F-Four..."
"Four what?" She asked again, sliding beneath a desk in an attempt to hide from the agents.
"Four agents, Nat. I'm... I'm surrounded."
Natasha held in a curse. "Are you hit?" She whispered.
"Yes."
"I'm coming, Clint. Don't move." She stated and ran away as soon as the agents lost her.
"No, Nat..." He mumbled. "Get the hell out of here, there's no way we can both make it out alive."
"Shut up, Barton." She said harshly. "I'm not going anywhere without my best friend."
A laugh followed by a hissed groan sounded. "I thought I was an asshole."
"You're my asshole who also happens to be my best friend, so shut the hell up and save some energy 'cause I'm coming for you."
In a couple of minutes, Natasha was finally able to find the room Clint was hiding in, trying her best not to be noticed by the guards and trigger an alarm. She gracefully slid behind them, reaching her partner who was struggling to stay awake.
"Nat..?" He whispered as soon as he felt her hands on him.
"Shh... I'm here." She responded, her hands wandering all over his body, trying to find which one of his wounds was the worst and most dangerous. "Damn it, Clint. You've lost too much blood." She said under her breath. With a quick move, she tore a piece of her suit and swiftly wrapped it around his abdomen, applying pressure to the gunshot wound that wouldn't stop erupting blood.
"Hey, Nat... Stop it, there's-" He let out a dry cough. "There's no point."
"Shut up." She muttered as she kept pressing her hands against the wound. "You're going to be fine. There's no way I'm letting you die. Okay?"
"Just let go, Tash," Clint whispered weakly. "You need to leave now."
"I will. With you. You're not dying, Barton. Not today." She replied. "I contacted Coulson, you just need to hold on and we'll be fine as long as we keep quiet."
He put his hand on top of hers, brushing his thumb over her trembling hand. "Listen-"
"No, you listen!" She muttered, trying her best not to be heard from the guards. "If you die today, I'll kill you. You get that? I'll find you wherever the hell you'll go after you die and I'll make sure that you're gonna die again in the worst way possible! Now shut up and stay strong because the extraction team is coming to get us and you'll be just fine."
He rolled his eyes, letting out a sigh in response. "I can't even die in peace..." He mumbled, a tiny grin escaping his mouth.
Natasha smirked back at him. "Jerk. You're not going to miss that date, Barton. No matter how much you're afraid of it."
"Shit, I thought you'd forgotten about it."
"Yeah, right. Did you really think I would forget about my only chance to get rid of your stupid ass?"
Clint let out a chuckle, wincing immediately in pain. "You can't get rid of me, Romanoff."
She ignored him. "As soon as we're back at the HQ, you're calling Laura, it's Valentine's Day. Be a gentleman."
Clint smiled. "If you say so..."
"And you're going to that date, Barton." She smiled at him but as soon as she glanced at her bloody hands she exhaled deeply. "I'll make sure you will." She mouthed.
4. The perfect suit
Natasha was pacing outside the fitting rooms.
"Could you stop that?" Clint's voice asked her from the inside.
"Stop what?"
"Stop walking up and down outside my fitting room. It kind of drives me crazy!" He replied.
"Sorry, I'm just nervous." She replied, biting her bottom lip.
"You're nervous? I'm the one who's getting married!" Natasha just shrugged in response. "Did you just shrug?"
"How can you even see what I'm doing?"
Clint felt out a chuckle. "Did you forget who I am, Romanoff?"
"Just get out, Barton." She muttered.
"Why the rush? Do you have any plans?"
"I don't like the tone, Barton. Besides, you know how I feel about Valentine's Day."
"Oh, yeah yeah... I know your hatred towards the day." He peeked his head out of the curtain. "Maybe if you meet someone special you'll stop being so bitchy about it." He teased her.
Natasha laughed. "Yeah, right... Shut up and get dressed. I want to see how you look." She told him as she continued wandering around the shop, staring at the tuxedos and wedding dresses around her.
"I look like I normally look when I'm wearing a tux, Romanoff. It's nothing special. I don't see the point of trying it out."
"Just get out here, Hawkeye."
"You know, it would be nice if you didn't shout my code name when we're not on missions."
Natasha laughed. "No one is here, your secret is safe." She said playfully.
"Here I am." Natasha turned around and glanced at the archer. He was right. It was nothing special. The tux wasn't any different than the other costumes he had worn during missions. But he was different. Natasha found herself staring at her friend, her stomach feeling sick as a wave of panic hit her. And suddenly, everything she thought she knew, everything she thought she felt changed. And in front of her wasn't her best friend standing.
"Terrible." She teased him, brushing off her mind her thoughts.
Clint furrowed his eyebrows. "You think?"
Natasha let out a chuckle. "You look great, Clint." She reassured him. She turned around again and glanced at the wedding dresses. "How can people wear these?"
"Oh, c'mon Nat. They're beautiful." He approached her.
"Not my type of clothing, though." She muttered.
"I bet you look great in it," Clint stated, taking one dress out of its hanger.
"I highly doubt that." Clint raised an eyebrow at her, making her roll her eyes. "Fine, I'll try it." She mumbled and grabbed the dress out of Clint's hands, heading to a dressing room. "Just to show you how ridiculous I'll look!" She added.
Clint waited right outside her dressing room, leaning on the wall, hands inside his tuxedo's pockets. "Are you ready already?"
The curtain moved and Natasha walked out, looking more gorgeous than ever. "Yes." She muttered.
Clint shifted, taking his hands off his pockets and staring at her, words failing to describe how flawless she looked with her messy red hair falling on her shoulders and her toned silhouette showing as the wedding dress hugged her body, cupping every curve and leaving her whole back uncovered.
"Wow, Barton. You could at least say I don't look that hideous, I'm taking it off."
"No, Tash." He grabbed her hand, pulling her back as she was heading back to the fitting room. He pulled her closer to him, his hand brushing a strand of hair out of her face. "You look..." He stopped for a moment. He couldn't find the right words. She looked up at him, right into his warm eyes. "I think I'm in love." He whispered.
Natasha opened her mouth to respond but was cut off by the woman who worked in the shop. "Whoa, look at you two! I think you're the most beautiful couple that has ever come in here! And you look so in love, I'm jealous!" She exclaimed happily.
The two spies almost immediately pulled apart. "Oh, no!" Natasha said. "We're not..."
"We're not a couple," Clint said.
"Yeah, yeah. We're not. I'm his friend. And he's getting married." Natasha tried to explain.
"I am. And she's helping me pick a tuxedo." He added.
"And we were kind of messing around with the dresses here."
They glanced at each other. "Yeah, we're... we're definitely not together," Clint repeated.
5. You're mine
Clint kicked the door open and entered his apartment, holding Natasha in his arms. He softly put her on his couch, before heading swiftly to the bathroom to grab his first aid kit.
"I'm fine." She choked out as she tried to sit up.
"Shut up and stay down," Clint replied. "You're certainly not fine, Nat." He whispered, trying to make her stand still so he could patch her up.
"Barton, it's okay. I can take care of myself." She grabbed his hand to stop him, but he brushed it off.
"In this condition, I highly doubt it." He muttered, giving her a glare. "You should've called me earlier."
"I was fine."
"Nat, you were surrounded by eight agents, all of them armed. And you were out of ammo. You should've called me for backup." He said, clenching his jaw.
"I called for backup."
"You didn't call me." He pointed out, avoiding eye contact with his partner.
"So you're mad that I called for backup and it wasn't you?"
He stopped taking care of her wounds and looked at her. "Why didn't you call me?"
"I didn't need you." She answered.
"Nat, you-"
"I didn't need you." She cut him off. Clint sighed and grabbed a bandage. "How did you find out, anyway? And what did you do to the extraction team Coulson sent?"
"The extraction team he sent was me." He muttered, keeping himself focused on stopping her bleeding. "Coulson was frantic. He was yelling at SHIELD agents, he was cursing himself for being too stupid to let you go on your own and he practically begged me to step in and save your ass. After firing me."
"He did what?"
"Well, he didn't know what he was doing. I think he fired a bunch of people, but he later hired them again. It was..." He paused. "It was weird. He was very worried about you."
Natasha lowered her head, not knowing what to reply to that. "So, I got a call informing me that my partner was dying." He added.
"I'm sorry, Clint."
"You scared me, Nat." He whispered.
She cupped his face in her gentle hands. "I'm really sorry."
"Why didn't you call me? Why the hell did you decide to go on that mission on your own?" Natasha opened her mouth to answer, but Clint interrupted her. "The truth, Romanoff."
She let out a deep sigh. "It's your first Valentine's Day with your wife, Clint. And I know how I feel about this stupid day, but I also know how you feel about it. You should spend it with your Valentine."
"Now I am." He replied quietly. Natasha squinted at him. She tugged his sleeve, urging him to continue. Clint took his eyes off of her wounds and looked up at her. "You're my Valentine, Nat." He told her, staring deep into her eyes. "Your Valentine isn't the one you're dating or are married to. Your Valentine is the one you can't live without. And today, when I got that call, I realized who that person is for me." He explained.
"Clint-"
"Don't make me live without you, Tash. Today... Today I thought I lost you. It was the worst feeling I have ever experienced. Don't make me go through this again. And I know there's Laura, and I swear I love her, but not... Not like that. Not like this. We should stay friends, stay at this point because Laura is great, but I just need you promise me that-"
She pulled his face closer to hers and gave him a deep kiss, one he willingly returned, tangling his fingers through her hair. Once they pulled apart, she stared into his eyes. "I won't leave you alone as long as you promise me the same thing."
He nodded, giving a peck to her hand. "I promise."
6. Broken
"You fucking promised me, Barton!" Clint tried to stay awake, but his own body was betraying him. He couldn't open his eyes, he couldn't move his arms, he couldn't understand what was happening. The only thing he sensed was Natasha's arms wrapping around his body, her muffled whimper and the tiny pecks she left all over his face. No matter how much he wanted to respond to her, to tell her everything was gonna be okay, the words failed to escape his mouth.
"Don't do this to me, asshole..." Natasha begged him, but even though he wanted to stay awake for her, he just couldn't.
"I'm sorry, Tash..." He mumbled before his let out a final breath.
"Clint!"
...
It was extremely sunny that day. It was hot and humid, definitely not like February was supposed to be. It was a short ceremony, with not many people, only his closest friends. Natasha took a few steps closer to Laura, but Steve's hand grabbed her arm to stop her. He gently pulled her closer to him and wrapped his arm around her waist.
"You have supported her enough. Now you need some support, too." He whispered in her ear. She didn't reply, she just nodded in a silent agreement.
"We're heading to the farm, will you join us?" Tony approached them.
"We're coming, Stark," Steve replied. Tony nodded and left them alone. Once everyone else had left, Steve gave a soft kiss on Natasha's temple and let go of her. "I'll be waiting a few steps away." He whispered and took a couple of steps backward.
Natasha took off her heels and sat on the grass, next to the archer's gravestone. "You're such a jerk, Barton." She muttered.
And she stood there.
Her mind wandering back in time when she had first met Clint Barton, in a way best friends don't usually meet each other. She recalled the moment the arrow passed right next to her face, leaving just a scratch on her left cheek. When she had looked up, Clint had already lowered his bow. That moment she knew. She knew he just gave her a second chance, a chance she was determined to exploit and be who she really wanted to be.
They had always been close, closer than the rest of the Avengers. They knew each other for more years and their bond was stronger than the others'. No one ever understood how the two assassins worked, but they always seemed to have a secret communication code, something unknown to the rest of the team. It always looked like they had entire conversations together while sitting with the rest of the team quietly in a room, just by exchanging stares. And it drove the rest of the Avengers crazy. Mostly Tony.
They were close. But she never really trusted him. Deep inside, she always feared that someday Clint would understand that he had made a serious mistake by saving her and he would kill her in her sleep someday. Or when they would start to build a strong friendship, when her guards were down he would just slit her throat or stick an arrow through her heart. She had always been afraid of that.
So, yeah... She never actually trusted him entirely. But she loved him. Oh, she loved him so much. She didn't quite understand when it happened, her brain was telling her it was some time during his wedding arrangements, but she knew it was earlier than that. But she probably understood it at that moment. When she knew she would lose him forever. They would still work together, of course, but everything would be different. Because he would be married to someone else.
She never wanted to hurt Laura. She liked her, very much. She thought Laura was everything Clint needed. She just couldn't stop herself from loving him. And then someday he said he loved her. It didn't matter that Clint thought she didn't hear it, he had said it. He had whispered it, in such a soft tone that she wondered if he had even heard it. It was during a mission in Paris, they were trapped in a tiny room for two days, until an extraction team was finally able to track them down and save them. She was curled up in his embrace, trying to fall asleep, when she felt his warm breath on her neck as he mouthed the three words before placing a kiss on her forehead. Maybe what made him say it was the fact that they thought they'd be dead soon, maybe because he didn't realize she wasn't asleep, it didn't matter to her.
And he never cheated on Laura. Yes, he had returned the kiss she gave him that night in his New York apartment, but that was it. Nothing else. It was like they were together, but they weren't. Because what Clint felt for Natasha was something different, but he still loved his wife. And he always would. So they just kept it that way. Two people who cared for each other deeply, two partners who would do anything to protect each other, two friends who stubbornly ignored the fact that they obviously were more than that.
Secret I-love-you's, when the other wasn't paying attention. Clint watching Nat while she was sleeping late at night just to be sure he'd be there for her in case a nightmare woke her up violently. Natasha making sure Clint had always enough arrows with him, sometimes she even left some of her weapons back to carry some extra arrows for Clint. Distant glances during SHIELD meetings. That was their everyday life.
Until it wasn't anymore.
Because on that 14th of February, Natasha had woken up by a nightmare, but when she reached out to her phone to call Clint in the middle of the night she took a look around her and saw her black dress on a hanger and remembered that Clint couldn't help her anymore.
Because later that day, when the sun was up, she dressed up and went to the cemetery close to the Barton farm.
Because Clint wasn't there to laugh at her for doing the same mistake over again and locking herself out of her own apartment when she left.
Because Laura was crying.
Because Steve and Tony weren't teasing each other and Thor didn't care about his human-phone doing crazy things.
Because she was sitting on the grass, next to his gravestone.
"Happy Valentine's Day, asshole." She murmured before grabbing her heels and standing up, walking away and leaving behind the most important person in her life forever.